The Dangers Of A Little Bit Of Success... :-)

ewhip17
ewhip17 Posts: 515 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I'm proud of what I've accomplished so far. Since January 1st I've lost 63lbs and am definitely living a much healthier lifestyle. People notice and comment on it and that feels good. I've bought smaller clothes - some of which are now too big - and that feels good.

But...... I'm really finding myself fighting off complacency. You know how it goes... you feel better, people tell you how you look better, and all of a sudden you start to feel like you've accomplished your goals when really you haven't. In reality I have at least 37lbs to lose before I reach my long term goal and it's getting harder and harder and harder. I'm ok with weight loss going more slowly as I was anticipating it and have tried to set myself up for it mentally and emotionally. But that complacency is creeping in and it has me on edge.

So I think I'm going to shake things up a bit. I have to refocus my efforts. My main goal was to take 2014 - the entire year - to reach a goal of losing 100lbs and developing a healthy lifestyle, and I'm still on track for that. But I can't let it slip away in the glow of a little bit of accomplishment....

Anyway. I lurk here quite a bit but don't post much but this AM I just thought many of you could relate. Phase 2 starts today. :-)
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Replies

  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    Yup...in May of 2013 I was there...I had lost down to a size 10 (from a 14/16) and I thought ...I look good...and I kind of was good with where I was.

    I was still 178lbs...

    Then...I found MFP through looking at success pics of a workout DVD I was thinking of doing.

    That kicked me out of that spot and I moved forward with more weight loss...and I got to my goal weight of 165...but I found the complacency wasn't there even at "goal" so I altered it...another 10...

    I ht that a couple weeks ago and I am happy to be at maitenance for the summer but at the same time still not quite satisfied..and I have set more goals...

    If at the end of the summer I am not totally happy with how I look I will do another cut...down to 145...but that is my cut off.

    I think as humans we need goals to strive for...and with weight loss/health/fitness that are always new goals to hit which is nice as it keeps the "aw that's good enough" attitude at bay.

    Congrats on seeing it and not letting it take over...and on the weight loss thus far.
  • ewhip17
    ewhip17 Posts: 515 Member
    Yeah that is great input and I totally agree. This thing is all about "mindset" - the right one will get you there but the wrong one won't. I know from experience.. haha.

    Going to mix up my workouts a bit but mainly I want to go back to focusing on smaller goals and just try and hit those. Make enough of those and the big one will take care of itself.
  • ktroiano1983
    ktroiano1983 Posts: 12 Member
    Sending motivational thoughts your way! That's been an all too common story for me. 10 pounds gone and one compliment from someone at work? Then I deserve a reward of cake! Just remember how many more compliments you'll get losing the rest of the weight.

    It might help to try to shake up your routine for the summer.
  • yankeedownsouth
    yankeedownsouth Posts: 717 Member
    Your post made me think of this: https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10152454189886648&id=334634416647

    I struggle with complacency too, especially in the summer.
  • almondize18
    almondize18 Posts: 15 Member
    Couldn't have read this at a better time. 32 pounds down and a couple of compliments from friends and suddenly I feel like the healthiest, fittest person in the world (even though I have a long way to go).

    Really pushed myself to get off my butt and go to the gym today - even though I didn't do very much - just to keep the habit going.
  • 40andFindingFitness
    40andFindingFitness Posts: 497 Member
    I can relate to this. I've gone down 60+ pounds (45 since being on MFP), and I feel great. I know I need to lose A LOT more weight but I'm not feeling it. It's terrible because I know I need to get motivated again but it's really discipline that I'm lacking. I've got to step up to the plate again.
  • hannahbergam
    hannahbergam Posts: 9
    First of all- congratulations! It sounds like you're doing amazing so far.

    I read a blog post yesterday about redefining your "Why". I think it's an amazing point. When we are all feeling a little complacent, it's good to remember why we started the journey in the first place. Having lost that much weight, I'm sure you're much healthier and have a higher quality of life- is it possible you need to adjust your "why"?

    I have found myself happy with where I am recently too, and needed to come up with new motivations. It isn't just about being at a goal weight anymore- it's about being the best version of myself. I'm getting there, and you will too:)
  • Pirate_chick
    Pirate_chick Posts: 1,216 Member
    I felt that way too. Been a slacker for about a month. Just got my groove back and ready to get back to fighting round 3 of 7. I sat up a reward system, for every 25lbs I lose,I get something that is just for me. I am working towards my third goal out of the 7 . I should have hit it by now, but oh well. I enjoyed my little "break"
  • HappyTravels
    HappyTravels Posts: 22 Member
    Yes Its Dangerous Those Compliments And Loose Clothes Can Break Your Convictions.
  • ewhip17
    ewhip17 Posts: 515 Member

    I read a blog post yesterday about redefining your "Why". I think it's an amazing point. When we are all feeling a little complacent, it's good to remember why we started the journey in the first place. Having lost that much weight, I'm sure you're much healthier and have a higher quality of life- is it possible you need to adjust your "why"?

    Yes - this is a great point. I need to get back in touch with that. When I started this whole thing I actually put together a giant spreadsheet that had a lot of data like calories, weight, measurements, etc, but it also had tabs just dedicated to "why". It's been a while since I looked at that but obviously I need to revisit it.

    And thanks for the responses - it's all very helpful.
  • JeffInJax
    JeffInJax Posts: 232 Member
    When you make a big stride it can be difficult to get back into the swing of things. I dropped from 380 to 275 and felt better, was enjoying life and got very complacent even though my goal was 225. I kept making excuses then did the whole on again off again, making no progress. Until one day just like it hit me with my first major loss, i woke up and was like "Im going to get to my original goal and thats all there is to it" Its all about the proper mindset and motivation AND making things a habit again. Before i eat anything its just habit to log onto MFP and log it in now, when i used to think calorie counting would be a pain and some people consider it obsessive, it literally takes nothing out of my day except maybe 5 minutes, 10 if MFP is being a pain and i cant find what i need to lol.
  • jeannemarie333
    jeannemarie333 Posts: 214 Member
    Excellent topic and thanks for posting!!! I can totally relate :) You are doing an amazing job - congrats!!
  • runningforicecream
    runningforicecream Posts: 89
    Can definitely relate. I lost about 28lbs (relatively little but then again I am short) in 2012 and was rather close to my GW. I then got complacent, thinking I've got it. The weight creeps back on. Not all the way but still. So this time, I am not going to just reach my goal and that is it. Instead, I am setting goals to work towards after I reach my initial ones. A lifetime of achievements and goals, so to speak. :happy:
  • ShellF415
    ShellF415 Posts: 182 Member
    A quick BMI check usually gives me a good kick in the butt when I get too comfortable.
  • DebbieLyn63
    DebbieLyn63 Posts: 2,654 Member
    I can so relate. After I lost the first 50 pounds, I felt so much better. And buying new clothes was fun again. I know I still have over 25 left to lose to get to my Healthy weight range, but just can't find that desperation motivation I had in the beginning. I have been at maintenance for almost a year now. I keep trying to get that mojo back I had in the beginning, but haven't been able to long-term yet.

    I have a birthday coming up in 2 months, and I am trying to just lose 10 lbs by then, but it's not going too well so far. I keep telling myself that at least I am maintaining, but that excuse is long overused.
  • ggeise14
    ggeise14 Posts: 387 Member
    I so needed this today. A good reminder to think about why I started this four+ years ago. Lost 30 lbs and have since regained about 10. Started to think "good enough" -- NOT. It's time to recommit and get this done!
  • marekdds
    marekdds Posts: 2,234 Member
    A quick look at my fat pics helps me not to get too complacent. I also have given myself the mindset that exercise is not an option, it is a requirement, as is staying off the junk (mostly, we are human after all). Instead of mulling over whether I feel like it, I just do it, part of my life now. Can't go back to fat. Congratulations on your progress so far and hang in there, you can do it.
  • Will_Thrust_For_Candy
    Will_Thrust_For_Candy Posts: 6,109 Member
    I have found that setting fitness related goals rather than just scale goals helps a lot too. The nutrition component often goes hand in hand with the fitness component to achieve your goal and honestly, in my experience, that's where the magic happens. It's less about just "losing the weight" and more about changing your life :smile:
  • emmanap91
    emmanap91 Posts: 300 Member
    It's hard for me because I only had 20 pounds to lose to begin with, and once I started losing even a few pounds people started saying I'm getting too skinny.

    My boyfriend's mother commented on how she could feel my ribs when she hugged me this past weekend, but I'm only down 5 pounds and my ribs have always been visible/feel-able, even at my highest weight (I'm pear-shaped, all my weight is in my hips/thighs/butt).

    I get discouraged by my slow loss, and then people say I'm too skinny. It's double-discouraging.
  • 0somuchbetter0
    0somuchbetter0 Posts: 1,335 Member
    I've been there too. I look at how far I've come and think "wow, I'm awesome!" but then I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I know I still have a long way to go.
  • ksy1969
    ksy1969 Posts: 700 Member
    Oh my gosh can I relate. I have been there now for the last 9 months. Basically ever since vacation last summer. I was looking good, in my minds eye, in a tank top and shorts and it went to my head. I just couldn't get fully back on the wagon after that. I found my "mindset" again a few weeks ago, but the 9 months since last summer I gained over 20lbs back. So now I have to take that off and still meet my goal weight. I believe I have the mindset to finish it now. Also going to do things different this time. I am going to do a less severe cut so I don't have to feel deprived. I am going to do it right this time :happy:
  • Slashnl
    Slashnl Posts: 339 Member
    Good topic! I've felt this too, but I caught myself and now I'm pushing hard again.

    I like the way you put it, that you're starting phase 2. I'm stealing that.
  • 1HappyRedhead
    1HappyRedhead Posts: 413 Member
    All I have to do is take a picture of myself..... that always kicks me in the butt! :sad:
  • ewhip17
    ewhip17 Posts: 515 Member
    Yeah the profile pic I have posted is of me when I was nearly at my heaviest - about 7lbs from it. I kind of leave it up on purpose. It's not flattering and I can see how unhappy I was.

    I'll admit that what kicked started this thread was the realization that I was making excuses again - just like I had for the last 10 years. You know: "not enough time", "stressed", "back hurts", "treadmill is broken", etc. And food related ones: "Hey, I've lost 63lbs, I can go over my calories today" (did that THREE times last week..). I didn't go to the gym this am for all of those reasons and it just made me realize that I was slipping.

    Fall down 7 times... get up 8!
  • JeffInJax
    JeffInJax Posts: 232 Member
    It's hard for me because I only had 20 pounds to lose to begin with, and once I started losing even a few pounds people started saying I'm getting too skinny.

    My boyfriend's mother commented on how she could feel my ribs when she hugged me this past weekend, but I'm only down 5 pounds and my ribs have always been visible/feel-able, even at my highest weight (I'm pear-shaped, all my weight is in my hips/thighs/butt).

    I get discouraged by my slow loss, and then people say I'm too skinny. It's double-discouraging.

    To be honest even at my size of 250 with a goal of 225 i get negative things like that from everyone. It almost feels like people know they wont do it themselves so they dont want to know someone else is able to. I deal with people at work trying to get me to stop eating right and working out or saying "you're tall and a big guy you shouldnt worry about weight" or lately everyone makes fun of me for plugging in my calories around lunch time. Its discouraging but you arent doing it for them anyways its for yourself and just remember that =)
  • notsochunkeymonkey
    notsochunkeymonkey Posts: 16
    63 pounds since January is really fast, congratulations!

    And warning, after it comes off so fast, it plateaus. It took me almost a year to go from -70 to -110. And then? Complacency kicked in and now I need to loose 29 pounds again. I'm big time changing it up this time, bought a FitBit One, a Core-Body Reformer and am actually going to track properly this time. Let's see how this keeps me motivated. :)
  • rrlwelter
    rrlwelter Posts: 40 Member
    I had multiple surgeries for several reasons 4 1/2 years ago, and wound up losing 134 pounds due to all the complications and results. My comment, from the first, has been that "If I can keep my head out of my &*(*&(), I can stay this way."

    And for me, that's my big reminder. Every so often I get stupid, and that's why I'm here at the moment: I got stupid again. I'm almost out of the stupid range, but need to keep that head up and out EVERY day.
  • HobbitSithLord
    HobbitSithLord Posts: 34 Member
    I know how this is. This combined with depression turned a 26 pound loss into a 9 pound loss and now I've got to do it all over again.
  • Fitnin6280
    Fitnin6280 Posts: 618 Member
    I think I could have written this. I am struggling to get back on track right now. I feel great, but know I would feel better if I just lost those last 25lbs or so. Glad to know I am not alone!
  • Iwishyouwell
    Iwishyouwell Posts: 1,888 Member

    And warning, after it comes off so fast, it plateaus.

    The rate of loss has nothing to do with a plateau. If it "comes off fast" and then plateaus, it means the person is eating at maintenance for their new weight.

    Plateaus typically happen because people fail to adjust their caloric intake to their new weight, not realizing that weight loss is about a constant lowering of calories throughout the entire process. People forget that the deficit that was doing just fine at 250 will cease to be effective at say 200.

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