how to get doctors to not call me anorexic?
IdcShrimp
Posts: 71
Look, I made a very adult decision this month and am VERY proud of myself.
I looked up some internal medicine doctors in my area, found one, left my pediatrician (I'm 20 now) and ventured over to her in the hopes of asking how to gain some weight and if she knew a nutritionist i could go work with. I told her i wanted to build some muscle and thought she would respect my decision to fix my underweightness. heres the thing, i'm underweight cause i have no clue what I'm doing, I've been using bro-science and google for three years to diet, so i lost a lot of weight very slowly. the past year i dropped to a weight that i saw no issue with, until i started looking in the mirror and being like '**** i look like I have pencil arms and my shoulders are creepy bony'.
so i went to the doc and the first thing i said was "help me gain weight? and i told her everything" she had the GALL to literally label me as anorexic. she used that term. i said, no, I'm not afraid of eating, i eat quite a lot, and i told her everything i eat. i also asked her how someone who seeks out a doctor to gain weight because they SEE a problem with being to skinny would be considered anorexic. she literally ignored me and made me cry. yeah, i cried in front of her, it was so embarrassing. because i took myself to my first adult docs appointment seeking to gain weight out of my own free will without any influence of friends or family. i just wanted to get healthy. and she insulted me and called me anorexic. even after i told her i wanted to gain weight and wasn't afraid of eating, she labeled me, just like that.
it was like one of those nightmares where nobody believes you, ya know? when you're screaming and nobody can hear you or they ignore you or you're paralyzed and can't move. it was so horrific and I'm mortified. how can i get her to stop treating me like a crazy person? i was able to get a nutritionist appointment for tomorrow so I'm gonna go talk to her. if nothing else, how can i get this nutritionist (and my doc of course) to treat me like a human being without a mental problem? an eating disorder is a mental state. and i don't have a mental state where i want to lose weight, or that i see a fat girl in the mirror. no, i see a skinny girl who needs muscly arms and some increased calories.
she mortified me by calling me anorexic. she is wrong. i want to gain, so how am i anorexic? that terminology was used incorrectly! there are fat anorexic people! there are also skinny underweight girls who want to gain weight! that does not make them anorexic since they are skinny! that is a state of mind!
proof:
Definitions of anorexia:
"Anorexia nervosa is an eating disorder that makes people lose more weight than is considered healthy for their age and height. Persons with this disorder may have an intense fear of weight gain, even when they are underweight. They may diet or exercise too much or use other ways to lose weight."
I DONT FEAR WEIGHT GAIN I ACTIVELY LOOKED FOR WEIGHT GAIN WITH THE HELP OF MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS
I DONT DIET/OR EXERCISE. AT ALL. I SIT ON MY COMPUTER ALL DAY. IT"S MY JOB.
another definition:
a lack or loss of appetite for food (as a medical condition).
an emotional disorder characterized by an obsessive desire to lose weight by refusing to eat.
I EAT ALLLL THE TIME AND ALOT! I ate 1800 cals yesterday! I'm only 5'2 and female! WHAT THE HELL SHE THINKS I DONT EAT!
Help i feel like nobody believes me! My mom even said if the doctor doesn't believe me she will take pictures of me eating every meal and shove them in her face. its so unfair and she's making me out to be a crazy person who starves themselves! should i never see this quack doctor again?
I looked up some internal medicine doctors in my area, found one, left my pediatrician (I'm 20 now) and ventured over to her in the hopes of asking how to gain some weight and if she knew a nutritionist i could go work with. I told her i wanted to build some muscle and thought she would respect my decision to fix my underweightness. heres the thing, i'm underweight cause i have no clue what I'm doing, I've been using bro-science and google for three years to diet, so i lost a lot of weight very slowly. the past year i dropped to a weight that i saw no issue with, until i started looking in the mirror and being like '**** i look like I have pencil arms and my shoulders are creepy bony'.
so i went to the doc and the first thing i said was "help me gain weight? and i told her everything" she had the GALL to literally label me as anorexic. she used that term. i said, no, I'm not afraid of eating, i eat quite a lot, and i told her everything i eat. i also asked her how someone who seeks out a doctor to gain weight because they SEE a problem with being to skinny would be considered anorexic. she literally ignored me and made me cry. yeah, i cried in front of her, it was so embarrassing. because i took myself to my first adult docs appointment seeking to gain weight out of my own free will without any influence of friends or family. i just wanted to get healthy. and she insulted me and called me anorexic. even after i told her i wanted to gain weight and wasn't afraid of eating, she labeled me, just like that.
it was like one of those nightmares where nobody believes you, ya know? when you're screaming and nobody can hear you or they ignore you or you're paralyzed and can't move. it was so horrific and I'm mortified. how can i get her to stop treating me like a crazy person? i was able to get a nutritionist appointment for tomorrow so I'm gonna go talk to her. if nothing else, how can i get this nutritionist (and my doc of course) to treat me like a human being without a mental problem? an eating disorder is a mental state. and i don't have a mental state where i want to lose weight, or that i see a fat girl in the mirror. no, i see a skinny girl who needs muscly arms and some increased calories.
she mortified me by calling me anorexic. she is wrong. i want to gain, so how am i anorexic? that terminology was used incorrectly! there are fat anorexic people! there are also skinny underweight girls who want to gain weight! that does not make them anorexic since they are skinny! that is a state of mind!
proof:
Definitions of anorexia:
"Anorexia nervosa is an eating disorder that makes people lose more weight than is considered healthy for their age and height. Persons with this disorder may have an intense fear of weight gain, even when they are underweight. They may diet or exercise too much or use other ways to lose weight."
I DONT FEAR WEIGHT GAIN I ACTIVELY LOOKED FOR WEIGHT GAIN WITH THE HELP OF MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS
I DONT DIET/OR EXERCISE. AT ALL. I SIT ON MY COMPUTER ALL DAY. IT"S MY JOB.
another definition:
a lack or loss of appetite for food (as a medical condition).
an emotional disorder characterized by an obsessive desire to lose weight by refusing to eat.
I EAT ALLLL THE TIME AND ALOT! I ate 1800 cals yesterday! I'm only 5'2 and female! WHAT THE HELL SHE THINKS I DONT EAT!
Help i feel like nobody believes me! My mom even said if the doctor doesn't believe me she will take pictures of me eating every meal and shove them in her face. its so unfair and she's making me out to be a crazy person who starves themselves! should i never see this quack doctor again?
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Replies
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Get a second opinion?0
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Definitely find another doctor.
There are a lot of doctors around who don't listen to their patients. Don't waste your time trying to change their minds. Just move on until you find one that will listen.
To be fair to your doctor, I'm sure he/she has seen severely underweight people before that swear they are not anorexic (though they are) just because they don't want to be labelled. And anorexics are notorious for coming up with all kinds of reasons that they are not anorexic - though they also usually will not admit they are underweight, either. But if you truly don't fit those symptoms, he/she should be willing to hold off on a diagnosis of anorexia for at least one visit until he/she sees what you do with proper nutritional information.0 -
Find another doctor.
You need to be able to be heard by your doctor and I would also copy and paste what you wrote and write a review on this doctor. She is unprofessional.0 -
give them your food diary0
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Hmm, your topic title suggested that more than one doctor called your anorexic, but the story says only one did.
Go see another doctor.0 -
Definitely find another doctor.
There are a lot of doctors around who don't listen to their patients. Don't waste your time trying to change their minds. Just move on until you find one that will listen.
To be fair to your doctor, I'm sure he/she has seen severely underweight people before that swear they are not anorexic (though they are) just because they don't want to be labelled. And anorexics are notorious for coming up with all kinds of reasons that they are not anorexic - though they also usually will not admit they are underweight, either. But if you truly don't fit those symptoms, he/she should be willing to hold off on a diagnosis of anorexia for at least one visit until he/she sees what you do with proper nutritional information.
This. Exactly this.
While yes, it's upsetting to you and I understand that. Anorexics typically refuse to admit they are until they are ready to get help and even then, sometimes they relapse.0 -
Obviously track all your food here to see how many calories you're getting. Think about adding some higher fat options. Heck, you could just down a tablespoon of coconut oil everyday just for the calories, although there are probably more enjoyable and nutritious options. Eat nuts. Eat more whole grains. Have a protein shake or meal replacement shake as a snack, not to replace a meal but as something additional.0
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I totally agree, anorexics tend to deny they have a problem and the doctor probably thought thats what you were trying to do. If you know deep down that you are mentally healthy, than that's all that matters. If I were you, I'd get advice from a personal trainer and dietition to start moving towards muscle gain.Definitely find another doctor.
There are a lot of doctors around who don't listen to their patients. Don't waste your time trying to change their minds. Just move on until you find one that will listen.
To be fair to your doctor, I'm sure he/she has seen severely underweight people before that swear they are not anorexic (though they are) just because they don't want to be labelled. And anorexics are notorious for coming up with all kinds of reasons that they are not anorexic - though they also usually will not admit they are underweight, either. But if you truly don't fit those symptoms, he/she should be willing to hold off on a diagnosis of anorexia for at least one visit until he/she sees what you do with proper nutritional information.0 -
You just posted another topic in the gaining weight forum because you want to gain muscle but NO FAT AT ALL. You called yourself "skinny fat." You were upset over eating 540 calories over maintenance.
I wouldn't worry about the doctor's label as long as it's going to help your insurance company pay for the help you need.0 -
Hmm, your topic title suggested that more than one doctor called your anorexic, but the story says only one did.
Go see another doctor.
Did the pediatrician call you anorexic too?0 -
I think the term 'anoriexic' is sometimes used by medical professionals to describe someone with a BMI of under 18, my sister was described as anorexic for her low weight by a doctor and it didn't mean she was suffering from actually suffering from anorexia.
I'd never heard of it before my sister told me, she could be just describing you low BMI - not saying you suffer from anorexia nervosa0 -
This is your second post on this exact same thing.
I'm not quick to call TROLL, but I smell something cooking.
Eat more protein and lift weights. You want to gain muscles without working out. That will never happen.
If you want to be rich do what rich people do.
If you want to be fit do what fit people do.
If your not willing to put in the work, then accept responsibility for where you are0 -
Even though your weightloss might have not been triggered by a mental disorder, we don't exactly know how did you lose so much weight yet. If you happened to lose enough weight to become "very underweight" (as I think you said in another topic), that might mean that your behaviour towards food hasn't been the most healthy, even if you didn't realize it. There is not only anorexia nervosa in this world. I think you should definitely go to a doctor for a check so that you know if your weightloss has been caused by a medical condition or not (which I 100% hope isn't your case).
Anyway, did you tell your doctor you didn't want to gain fat as you stated in the other topic? Because that might have played a big role in diagnosing you as anorexic even if you feel it's not your case. If you're underweight you will most likely have to gain some fat tissue too in order to get healthy.0 -
I wouldn't worry about the doctor's label as long as it's going to help your insurance company pay for the help you need.
This.
I am currently labeled T2 diabetic and when the diabetes control benefits are used up I will get relabeled obese so I can continue to see the dietician.0 -
Your irrational fear of 540 calories "turning to flab" in your other thread raises some red flags. Who cares what the Dr labels it, as long as you get the results you are hoping for.
Did this Dr say they were not willing to help you gain? Seek a second opinion if you feel that strongly about it, but your defensive attitude says the next Dr will likely say something equally as offensive to you and you won't ever get the help you need.0 -
Another definition: a disorder characterized by fear of becoming fat
Truly, who cares about the terminology used, if in fact you do want to change and get healthy.0 -
I totally agree, anorexics tend to deny they have a problem and the doctor probably thought thats what you were trying to do. If you know deep down that you are mentally healthy, than that's all that matters. If I were you, I'd get advice from a personal trainer and dietition to start moving towards muscle gain.Definitely find another doctor.
There are a lot of doctors around who don't listen to their patients. Don't waste your time trying to change their minds. Just move on until you find one that will listen.
To be fair to your doctor, I'm sure he/she has seen severely underweight people before that swear they are not anorexic (though they are) just because they don't want to be labelled. And anorexics are notorious for coming up with all kinds of reasons that they are not anorexic - though they also usually will not admit they are underweight, either. But if you truly don't fit those symptoms, he/she should be willing to hold off on a diagnosis of anorexia for at least one visit until he/she sees what you do with proper nutritional information.
I 100% agree with this. However, to be fair your definition stated "Anorexia nervosa is an eating disorder that makes people lose more weight than is considered healthy for their age and height. Persons with this disorder MAY have an intense fear of weight gain, even when they are underweight. They MAY diet or exercise too much or use other ways to lose weight." At one time you lost more weight than what is considered healthy so that's probably why the doctor used the term anorexia.0 -
You just posted another topic in the gaining weight forum because you want to gain muscle but NO FAT AT ALL. You called yourself "skinny fat." You were upset over eating 540 calories over maintenance.
I wouldn't worry about the doctor's label as long as it's going to help your insurance company pay for the help you need.
This...0 -
I ate 1800 cals yesterday!
In your other post you said you ate 540 calories over your TDEE yesterday. I'm 110% sure your TDEE is not 1260 calories, so what gives? Were you lying then or are you lying now?
Regardless, 1800 calories is not "a lot." It would seem like a lot to a person with anorexia, though. Hint, hint. I eat 1800 calories per day to LOSE weight. If you need to GAIN weight, you need to eat more.0 -
I ate 1800 cals yesterday!
In your other post you said you ate 540 calories over your TDEE yesterday. I'm 110% sure your TDEE is not 1260 calories, so what gives? Were you lying then or are you lying now?
Hence the TROLL comment.0 -
Several of your posts talk about the fear of fat - including getting screwed because your mom got the 85/15 turkey not the 99% lean turkey.
You talk about reducing calories because you only slept for 4 hours
Obsessing over 58 calories on your pedometer
Not to mention the post today about gain muscle BUT NOT FAT NO NO FAT
These are all major red flags. Just because you don't think you are anorexic doesn't mean that you are not. By all means get a second opinion - but if they agree you may have to accept that you might very well be.
You also went on about how tiny you are to justify eating around 1300 cals a day - but here you say you are 5'2
5'2 IS NOT TINY, I am 5'2 and lose weight on 1800 a day - I maintain on that with no exercise.
SO how much do you weigh?0 -
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I'm sorry but I highly doubt you just accidentally got anorexic level underweight.
As anyone that is lean can attest to, your body has very powerful hormonal defenses against starvation that become absolutely brutal and unbearable the leaner you get.0 -
Just go to another doctor
I had a horrible experience with a doctor when I had a UTI, and she was *convinced* I had an STD even though I do not. I cried a LOT when I was at her office, but then I went to a different doctor and he was super warm and friendly and tested me for a UTI (which I had) and gave me medication for it go away!
Remember that doctors are people too That's one of the scariest things I think I kind of had the realization of growing up lol but yeah.. just find another. 0 -
I ate 1800 cals yesterday!
In your other post you said you ate 540 calories over your TDEE yesterday. I'm 110% sure your TDEE is not 1260 calories, so what gives? Were you lying then or are you lying now?
Hence the TROLL comment.
When I read these posts, my brain hears a lot of panic. Maybe your doctor picked up on that? In the other post you call yourself "STUPID" and say that you are "PISSED OFF." I also see "guilt" and "paranoia."
Your doctor is on to something.0 -
You cry about the doctor labeling you, yet it seems you label all girls with anorexia as crazies who don't know how to do anything but starve themselves.
Also, maybe you're so defensive about it because your doctor is at least a little bit right.0 -
look up body dysmorphia.... on another note.. when seeking out a doctor one should always shop around... with something as important as health matters... one should always do their homework and interview, interview, interview...it is YOUR life this person is going to help you maintain...0
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I've looked at your entire post history. Kudos to you for reaching out and getting help. In a few years, I hope that you'll be able to post a success story like this:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1324837-a-different-kind-of-transformation0 -
Does the label really matter if you are getting the help you need? Anorexics need appointments with nutritionists to help gain weight. You want an appointment with a nutritionist to help gain wait. I'm sorry if it hurt your feelings but don't let that discourage you. Do want you need/want to do and gain weight. Then next time you need a doctor, pick a different one.0
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SO how much do you weigh?
On May 1 she weighed 86 pounds, from a prior thread. She would have to confirm whether or not she has successfully gained any since then.0
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