Juggling Fitness and Parenting???

_JPunky
_JPunky Posts: 508 Member
in Chit-Chat
As my daughter is getting older (she's 8), I'm finding it harder and harder to juggle my fitness goals with being a single parent.

I work full time, so I can't go to the gym during the day.

I'm a single mom, so I can't leave her home in the morning before work and go to the gym.

And, my God, that kid complains when I leave her in the kids room at the gym in the evenings! "But, I don't WANNA go to the kids room! I just want to spend time with you!" Blah, blah, blah...cry, cry, cry...

So, mostly because I just don't want to hear the whining tonight, I was thinking about possibly skipping the gym tonight and working out from home.

She used to love when I would lift her over my chest like I was bench pressing her when she was a baby. So, I was thinking I could get some of those in...I could throw her over my shoulders and do some squats...and I could deadlift her. I mean, right there I've got a full body workout!

I mean, sure, she may complain about being tossed around so much, but if she's going to whine about wanting "quality time" than beggers can't be choosers, right? I'm thinking as long as I don't feed her first it should be ok...I don't want her hurling on the floor.

So, what do you guys think? Is this a good solution? Could I get in trouble for child abuse or would you just consider this quality bonding time?
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Replies

  • k8blujay2
    k8blujay2 Posts: 4,941 Member
    Hahaha... Oh man, I feel your pain... Even as a married mom I find it hard to juggle fitness goals. Still haven't figured it out...
  • _Waffle_
    _Waffle_ Posts: 13,049 Member
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  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    I'm always so happy to hear of parents not letting their kids get in the way of fitness.

    Turn on some music she likes while doing the activity. That way it's totally quality time.
  • _JPunky
    _JPunky Posts: 508 Member
    Maybe juggling is the answer. I would think juggling a couple of kids would be a really good workout. There might be a few injuries while you learn how to juggle, but you'll figure it out eventually.

    Dang it, now I wish I'd had more kids...
  • FitWithFarrarLinds
    FitWithFarrarLinds Posts: 2
    I get up an hour before he does (4am) and use at-home workout programs!! It's the only thing I've found works for me - ensuring I get it done!
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    Full disclosure--I'm not a single parent, but I like to maximize my time spent with my kid as well. I only do it once she's in bed. Sometimes that's at 8pm, and other times, it's much later. I just gotta suck it up and do it.
  • tigerblue
    tigerblue Posts: 1,526 Member
    I get up an hour before he does (4am) and use at-home workout programs!! It's the only thing I've found works for me - ensuring I get it done!

    This. Find several DVD workouts that you love, buy some dumbells and resistance cords, and work out at home. You'll even save the time that you would have been travelling to the gym. It you are not a Morning person, you can do it in the evening while your daughter works on homework or plays in the room with you. That way, you are still spending time with her. As she gets older she might even join you and develop a love for fitness. I used to swim laps while my kids played in the neighborhood pool. (We had excellent lifeguards who would allow them to play in the shallow end without a parent.) When my oldest son was 5 he asked to start swimming laps with me. Now both are competitive swimmers, with my oldest looking for a swim scholarship in college soon! So it never hurts to introduce them to exercise early.
  • jnichel
    jnichel Posts: 4,553 Member
    Oldest son is out of the house, middle son goes to the gym with me and the youngest stays home with my wife or I. The wife and I go to the gym at different times, so one of us is always with the 8yo. Now, having you kid go to the gym with you may not be the best thing....my middle child plays HS football and is always yelling at me for not lifting enough. :laugh:
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,031 Member
    Luckily, my DD LOVES going to the gym (2 times a day in the summer because of my split times) so really don't know what to say to you. I do believe that she shouldn't be so "clingy", but I don't have any insight on your actual time spent with her.
    Anyway, you can still get a good workout at home. If you need home equipment and don't want to spend a lot of money or take up space, look into TRX suspension systems.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member
    I'm that mean parent who takes my kids anyway. I need that time away from them. I am also a single mom of 2 and when I started working out, I had 3 jobs. I did it anyway. I do this for my sanity, my health, and so that I can say I have done my best to be healthy for my kids. I also try to involve them when I can. I put them on their bikes sometimes when I go for jogs. If I work out at home, I invite them to work out with me. However, not going to the gym because my kids whine about it isn't an option. They will go. They don't have to like it, but they will go. After going for a while, they made friends, and they started seeing kids that they knew from school. It's good that you are trying to find solutions to continue working out, but I would suggest that you continue going to the gym.
  • PinkyFett
    PinkyFett Posts: 842 Member
    Lots of people do it. I have 3 kids from 10 months to 5 years and I'm a full-time student too. Also desperately trying to find a job.

    Ya do what ya gotta do if you want it badly enough.
  • notreallychris
    notreallychris Posts: 501 Member
    Full disclosure--I'm not a single parent, but I like to maximize my time spent with my kid as well. I only do it once she's in bed. Sometimes that's at 8pm, and other times, it's much later. I just gotta suck it up and do it.

    My situation as well. Would be tough as a single parent though, hopefully you can find something that works.
  • Squamation
    Squamation Posts: 522 Member
    I would just take my son to the gym when I was a single parent and let him complain. He was only 2 at the time, but going through that no-separation stage so some days it was rough. But we walked there and back, and got together time at home as well so I didn't really feel bad about it.

    I think you should try to do some lifts with her- my guess is she'll hate it and then not complain so much the next time you go to the gym.
  • michelleepotter
    michelleepotter Posts: 800 Member
    LOL, I do use my 6 month old when I exercise. I put her in a carrier and do a routine specifically designed for that. ;-) My older kids sometimes sit on my bed and watch me, sometimes do it with me, and sometimes ignore me and go play. Nothing wrong with letting the kids be part of things.
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    Single parent w/custody of a 9 year old and have a full time job... I run an average of 6-8 hours per week, cook meals, etc. When I was 8-11, I was a latch key kid, as in parents went to work at 7, and I would walk to the bus stop at 730, and I would let myself in the house at 3, lock the door, and go play video games until they got home at 5. My son stays in the house in the event I run while he's home, but it's usually <1hr (and he'd never know I was gone if I didn't tell him). The other times, I run during my lunch or allotted gym time at work. Teach your daughter to be self sufficient and to not get into things while you're gone. A little independence goes a long way for her development and your sanity. She's a little old for a toddler room at the gym.
  • 1PatientBear
    1PatientBear Posts: 2,089 Member
    TL; DR

    Just break up
  • sheenarama
    sheenarama Posts: 733 Member
    How about you juggle your kid as part of your fitness routine?

    JugglingBabies1Lg.jpg
  • RachelX04
    RachelX04 Posts: 1,123 Member
    I workout at night after my kids are tucked in bed or early in the morning while they are sleeping. I workout at home so this works for me.
    Is it possible to get a gym buddy so you watch their kids while they are at the gym and they watch yours while you go? Just a thought
  • triciabh1
    triciabh1 Posts: 126 Member
    Full disclosure--I'm not a single parent, but I like to maximize my time spent with my kid as well. I only do it once she's in bed. Sometimes that's at 8pm, and other times, it's much later. I just gotta suck it up and do it.

    This is what I do too...although it is usually much later, especially in the summer. I am not a morning person at all and 6am is the earliest I can wake up but that doesn't give me any time to work out.
  • luv_lea
    luv_lea Posts: 1,094 Member
    My son (8) has whined a little bit about having to go to the gym (he is old enough he gets to chose between the child room or the pool.) I just explained to him that I have my activities I commit to, the same way he has activities he commits to that I sit through (sports, scouts, etc.,) and that it's important for us to support each other. He understood completely and hasn't whined since.

    Lately I've been trying to do more activities outside though (at the park or local track) so he can ride his bike/play.
  • DavidMartinez2
    DavidMartinez2 Posts: 840 Member
    Lately I've been trying to do more activities outside though (at the park or local track) so he can ride his bike/play.

    I've been able to get some 4-5 mile runs in while my kids ride their bike alongside me. During soccer season I was able to get in 7 miles during practices. The getting up asscrack early and doing DVD's in the living room are probably your best option for the next year or so.
  • FitWarrior7
    FitWarrior7 Posts: 332 Member
    Home DVD workouts? Insanity or T25? P90x? Heck she can do it with you since she never wants to leave your side?
  • aarnwine2013
    aarnwine2013 Posts: 317 Member
    This can be tricky. I'm married so not the same but I take my 10 year old with me. She ran track this year so she runs, I run. It works. The rest of the time I run on my treadmill.
  • kelsully
    kelsully Posts: 1,008 Member
    As my daughter is getting older (she's 8), I'm finding it harder and harder to juggle my fitness goals with being a single parent.

    I work full time, so I can't go to the gym during the day.

    I'm a single mom, so I can't leave her home in the morning before work and go to the gym.

    And, my God, that kid complains when I leave her in the kids room at the gym in the evenings! "But, I don't WANNA go to the kids room! I just want to spend time with you!" Blah, blah, blah...cry, cry, cry...

    So, mostly because I just don't want to hear the whining tonight, I was thinking about possibly skipping the gym tonight and working out from home.

    She used to love when I would lift her over my chest like I was bench pressing her when she was a baby. So, I was thinking I could get some of those in...I could throw her over my shoulders and do some squats...and I could deadlift her. I mean, right there I've got a full body workout!

    I mean, sure, she may complain about being tossed around so much, but if she's going to whine about wanting "quality time" than beggers can't be choosers, right? I'm thinking as long as I don't feed her first it should be ok...I don't want her hurling on the floor.

    So, what do you guys think? Is this a good solution? Could I get in trouble for child abuse or would you just consider this quality bonding time?


    It would be fun if you found a way to workout together. My kids like to do videos with me. The younger 2 kids are 6 and 9 and they will do a p90x video on their own in the winter when they are bored..they are nuts...LOL

    My kids love if I find ways to incorporate them into my workouts but sometimes I have to just tell them...this is what I need to do to stay healthy and fit, which is what I want for both of us. Tonight I cannot get my workout done while you are at school or at practice or whatever so tonight I need you give me the space I need to make it happen. They do this for me, and I drive them all over kingdom come and attend very very very very very boring swim meets because I love them (or volleyball games or dance recitals or drive 2 hours for a gymnastics meet or sit in a gym all day at a wrestling tournament.)
  • vkdarling
    vkdarling Posts: 161 Member
    I either do something that my 6 year old can do with me (jump on the trampoline, walk a few miles, ride a bike, do a workout video) or I wait until he goes to bed - usally do both everyday. Sometimes he is asleep by 8 and I workout from 830-930... other nights he is asleep at 11 and I have a long night... It is hard to do for sure but I know we make time for the things most important to us - my most important is my son so im not going to ditch him for an hour or more a night to workout - but its also important to me to make time to workout.... so I'm left sleepy the next day and thats okay
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    I use the Convict Conditioning program. Progressive, bodyweight training that concentrates on 6 compound exercises.

    ETA - mine are younger and love when I do weighted squats with them. It can get hard to manage their long legs as they get older though.
  • iWorkout4Vino
    iWorkout4Vino Posts: 25 Member
    I get up an hour before he does (4am) and use at-home workout programs!! It's the only thing I've found works for me - ensuring I get it done!

    This is also the only thing that works for me! I'm a full time working single mum to a 3 year old and the only way I can get in a regular workout is at 5am - before she gets up and before work!
  • Beckboo0912
    Beckboo0912 Posts: 447 Member
    I am a full time single mom to a boy, if I feel the need to go to the gym, then we go. Mixing it up is good but sometimes I need my gym time to think or whatever. I have found he stops whining...granted I don't like whining and he knows how I feel about it. I usually do more with him on the weekend with him and going outside to get my exercise but he knows by now that I'm going to the gym even if he isn't feeling it. When he is older it will be different and he can come for a walk/run or stay home but right now my working out isn't up to him
  • aswearingen22
    aswearingen22 Posts: 271 Member
    Get up earlier and get it done while she's sleeping. I'm usually running by 5am every day (treadmill in the basement if my husband is out of town), and do dvd's as well. If I don't get it done before getting them up, I get it done at home as soon as I get them home from work/school. If I wait until after they're in bed, I'd never do it, but I know plenty of people that do.

    Personally, I'd tell her 3 days a week she's going, and 3 days a week you'll work out from home, or whatever works for you. I understand wanting to spend time with her, but I know I'm a better mom and feel better when I get those work outs in, and I think it's important to model the healthy lifestyle for them, despite the obstacles (i.e., whining kids!).
  • disneygallagirl
    disneygallagirl Posts: 515 Member
    Keep at it for your sanity. I am a Mom to 2 boys with a husband who works shift. It is hard to balance. I wouldn't give up the gym since it is your routine now- but maybe substitute some gym time for exercise you can do together i.e. bike riding and / or maybe an early morning workout to a DVD at home.

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