Motivation and support feels non-existant.

Stay on this site. There is support and motivation. I too am frustrated. The scale is not moving. (Btw. I just found out that some folks will not accept a friend request if your profile is not filled out) maybe do that.
I just joined a group that is doing Jillian micheals' 30 day shred. It's a challenge to say the least. I will send you an invitation if you' d like.
I have no real answers for you yet. I am figuring out my journey. I do know that there is support here.
Don't give up. :flowerforyou:

Hello. I'm new to this whole thing...

So I've tried a lot of diets in my life. The most I was ever able to lose is 30 pounds back when I was in high school and that's about it. It was over a period of 5 months where I was on a (rather destructive and completely exhausting) no-carb diet. I managed to lose SOME of the weight that haunted me my entire life, but I couldn't keep up with the constantly tiredness, headaches and flat out body aches.

I have been back at this whole weight thing for over a month. I felt like I have been rather pristine with my diet and sheer will had got me to reduce my need for intake, back down to normal portions and I have worked out from roughly 30 minutes of intense cardio (p90x) to upwards of an hour and a half of walking combined with some jogging. (it wrecks my knees though).

I can honestly say I have never worked out so hard in my life, however, when I stepped onto the scale a few days ago, after a whole month of doing this (I swear this consumed my life), I was brought to immediate tears to find I GAINED more weight! I still look like the same sack of crap I have and I feel absolutely no different. I know it's only a month, but STILL. I busted my *kitten* trying to lose this glob of a stomach and these sacks of fat on my upper legs and arms. It is completely disheartening.

I am seriously considering giving up and settling with the idea of being an unmarried hermit for the rest of my life, but there is a thread of hope still left, saying that I can't give up just yet. It's quickly diminishing, however and I fear that if I don't lose soon, then It may be game over for me and my chances to become a comfortable 150.

When I attempt to go to the few people that I trust and/or care about with my frustrations, they frustrate me more with comments like "Well, apparently you're not working hard enough" or "Too bad you don't have incredible genes like mine". I feel like I have absolutely no support.

It's hard being your own support, but it's been a month or so with me dealing with it.

I'd just echo what JTick said about the diet thing. Something is off. Either you're not logging food and/or exercise accurately and/or you have a medical issue.

That being said, there's a few things to consider. If you're weighing once a month, you could have lost steadily over the last three weeks and then had a sudden weight spike because of sodium or other issues. It's possible that all the physical activity is causing you to retain water as well. If you are eating in a way that meets your nutritional needs (enough calories, in other words) just keep doing what you are doing and the weight loss will fall into place.

If running is killing your knees, then you need to improve your form. Knee pain is never something you should tolerate.

If you are doing so much that you feel like it's consuming your life or that it would be easier to quit, cut back. Don't try to be so pristine in your diet, just use sensible portion control for the foods you like. Limit your exercise to the 30-45 minutes a day/ 5 days a week recommendation. Making healthy changes shouldn't feel like moving the world.

And, I'm sorry, but I know people who are heavier than you who have been married to wonderful people for many years. Don't underestimate who you are today.

Know that you are worth the effort.

Without being able to see your diary or know any stats about you (height, weight, how much you want to lose, how many calories you are eating) you are only going to get general suggestions.

First of all, you kinda said it yourself. You either keep plugging away at it or you give up. Are you happy with how you look, your energy levels, how you feel when out with friends or when shopping? If the answer is no, then why quit? This IS hard. If it was easy, nobody would be overweight. You have to make the decision every single day to stick with it and the motivation has to come from within you.

How are you determining what you eat? Measuring? Weighing? Eyeballing? I'm not religious with my weighing but it's the best way to make certain you are eating the amount you think you are. Are you logging EVERY SINGLE THING that crosses your lips? How are you determining your exercise calories? Machines at the gym and MFP are notorious for being overly generous with the calorie burns. Are you eating back at least some of those exercise calories? Too little food can be as much of a problem as too much in terms of scale movement.

For support, surf these boards and read, read, read to educate yourself about what you need to do. Find people with similar goals as you (introduce yourself section is the best place to find these folks), look for folks who post things you think are smart or that you like their personality and send a friend request WITH A NOTE EXPLAINING WHY YOU WANT TO BE FRIENDS. You wouldn't go up to some random stranger at the grocery store and ask to be friends without a reason so don't do it here either. Also read the success stories to motivate yourself to make your own support story!

Also, don't think of this as a diet. Diets fail. They have an endpoint where you think you can go back to eating the way you were before you started trying to lose weight. That's where everybody gains their weight back (and we've all done it). Instead, make changes you can live with forever. Eat foods that are good for your body and that you like to eat 80% of the time but plan to have some treats-just fit in your calorie goal for the day. (Unless you plan to give up chocolate forever!)

Good luck!

First of all, you've got this! Second of all, you've got this!! Lastly, YOU'VE GOT THIS!!!

Stay in there and be strong for you. Ignore the comments from others that focus on defeat. Everyone works differently although many of the routines and ideas will adapt nicely to what you need. Find your rythm and stick with it. For me, I dedicate a solid hour of lifting or cardio four times a week. I'm congnisent of my portion sizes and feed myself a four to five times a day making sure i have some protein with each meal.

Find your rythm and jive to it. The health and fitness world is a slow moving one but happy place once found.

Moreover, your social status has no correlation to your fitness. They are independent beings. Encourage yourself and the journey will take care of itself. Cheers!

Love this!! Very nicely put!! And super encouraging!! You had me at 1st, 2nd and 3rd.. YOU CAN DO THIS!! This is great advise!
He's right.. You can and will do this! Plenty of wonderful people on here for support!

I am completely astounded by the number of people who had already came back and added to this board. I greatly appreciate the support, even though that I feel down on my luck.

I have been using measuring cups to measure my food and whatnot. I'm not exactly in the best of financial situations to get a measuring scale, but I feel like I have already deprived myself from food enough that sometimes I feel like what I am left with is still kind of small at times. I opened my diary for anyone to view, though I have just recently logged my first day. Before, I would simply just use a calculator every time I ate something. So if I'm allowed 1430 calories a day, I will just keep subtracting every time I ate. I've also learned the rule 'Dont eat till you are full, eat till you think your satisfied and wait a few minutes'.

I also don't have the luxury to go to a gym, but I live in the mountains where there is some uphill climbing to do. I try to keep my workouts private because, really, I am a private person and also because I don't like the feeling of being watched by other people as I slather my body over workout equipment... I don't mean to sound rude or anything, but I've got such a negative outlook on myself over this whole thing.

I'll probably be in a better mood about this, but I appreciate it how you all let me speak my mind when I was a total c*** and let off some steam.

Don't speak so negatively about yourself.

I, personally, don't weigh my food. However, I lose/gain at a consistent rate that matches the calories I eat. If I started having issues, I'd start weighing. You can get a food scale for $8.00
(http://www.amazon.com/Ekco-1094909-5-Lbs-Kitchen-Scale/dp/B005PFUMKI/)

I checked and your diary didn't look open - however, that's secondary to being accurate.

I don't work out in a gym either. I learned to run with the Couch to 5k program and do a progressive body weight program for resistance training. There are all kinds of options to meet anybody's constraints - the forums are a great place to get ideas.

You can do this!

The motivation and support is right here.
I have been on various weight loss programmes for almost 40 years, some successful(Weight Watchers), some not. Even with my success at WW, I always fell off after a few weeks and coasted through at times not really following the programme and even using fasting and laxatives before weigh in days.
Since coming back to MFP a couple of months ago, I have tracked for 70 consecutive days, which is something I have never ever accomplished before, and have lost every week for a total of 20lbs in that time. There is something here that has made a difference and helped change my thinking this time around. This is the only place I have shared my starting weight and only told my husband what it was a couple of days ago.
I come on every day and read and lurk on some threads, learn form others' successes and mistakes. I have a few friends and an open diary. I don't know if anybody has ever looked at my diary, but it's there and open and it's helping keep me accountable. The amount of weight I have to lose is showing on my ticker.
I also work out at home since I can't afford a gym membership and I'm also not ready to work out in public.
Wishing you luck and strength. Feel free to add me if you want.

Hi there! Yeah it normally sucks for a while but eventually you fall into a healthy grove and it just gets easier to roll along. When I started I was eyeballing stuff and thought I was eating about 1700 calories a day on a restricted diet that left me hungry all the time. When I got a scale and started measuring things it turns out I was actually eating 2300 calories a day... I'm not even especially stupid, just really bad at guessing calories.

For me things got A LOT easier when I started eating big cuts of lean protein and a big servings of veggies. I ditched all the extra breads, sauces and sides and found out that a big thing of turkey and some peas or broccoli filled me up for 350 calories while 1000 calories from McDonalds was just an appetizer.

The exercise stuff sucks but you really shouldn't do anything that hurts. I gave the treadmill a try and my knees complained so I just dusted the bike off in my garage and take that out instead. Knees are dandy and I enjoy the bike so it works out well.

Anyway, add some good friends on here, log all your food, get a scale when you can, find some exercise you enjoy and eventually it all comes together pretty easily.

Good luck!

I wanted to add that if you are doing P90X every day that 1400 calories a day is probably too low. Try to be in the 1600-1800 range and see if that is easier for you to maintain.

Your body might be holding onto those extra calories because of your intense workout. I agree with the post above, eat a few more calories. Big changes in your body take time to show, especially if your in the process of improving your body through exercise. Just be patient. If you need motivation, give yourself a hopeful, but flexible deadline. Remind yourself of why you're doing what you're doing, and most importantly, find some friends that will support you! The "don't you just wish you were perfect like me" friends will not be supportive of you during the tough times, and will not be happy for you when you cross that finish line. Do this for yourself, and surround yourself with people who understand. Good Luck! I'm sure you'll do great!