Family issues

LeeAnne210
LeeAnne210 Posts: 40
in Motivation and Support
So after some thinking I've decided to lose 10 more pounds to get to the lower end of my bmi. I do a very loose version of 5:2 fasting, not restricting to 500cals a fast day, but about 875. That's half a pound loss exactly a week (give or take). Also I don't really fast I eat breakfast, lunch and dinner. I chose this because it's most maintainable for me at the moment, eating restricted 2 days and tdee the rest.

But that's some backround. Here's the problem.

My steph-mother, is a witch when it comes to weight loss. My sister has been bordering on anorexic and now she thinks I'll be the same if I lose more weight and has "forbidden" me (giggles) of doing so. She wants me to stay at 125lb, and I want to go down to 116, being 5'1 small-framed, it's not that horrible to me. Plus I have got fat to spare. Obviously when I go for a visit, she'll notice I look smaller, but she threatened on throwing me somewhere in a rehab centre if I do...

Come on! Give me your best excuses for looking thinner! Throw'em at me! I need all the help I can get. Sorry about the long post...btw.

Replies

  • oedipa_maas
    oedipa_maas Posts: 577 Member
    You're 21 years old, she can't throw you anywhere. Involuntary commitment is not going to happen.

    You are your own woman. Instead of having a cache of slender explanations, ignore her, minimize your time with her, don't waste precious energy on this. Don't play her game. Disengage.

    I am genuinely concerned about your sister, though. Since you used the term anorexic, you must be in some agreement with your stepmother that your sister might not be well. Have you talked to your sister about this? Is she getting any kind of treatment?

    Your goal doesn't seem dangerous for yourself, but I'll defer to others who are your height. I'm really tall so obviously my weight goal is different.
  • Oi_Sunshine
    Oi_Sunshine Posts: 819 Member
    How old are you?

    Assuming you are an adult, which you have to be to use this site, you cannot be held against your will at a treatment centre. I think your plan sounds complicated and very restrictive. Check out Getting Started and read all the red stickpin posts to get a good calorie goal set up and understand weight loss better. When you see your stepmother, say "My weight is not up for discussion." If she still insists, leave. It may take a rounds of this before she takes you seriously.
  • LeeAnne210
    LeeAnne210 Posts: 40
    How old are you?

    Assuming you are an adult, which you have to be to use this site, you cannot be held against your will at a treatment centre. I think your plan sounds complicated and very restrictive. Check out Getting Started and read all the red stickpin posts to get a good calorie goal set up and understand weight loss better. When you see your stepmother, say "My weight is not up for discussion." If she still insists, leave. It may take a rounds of this before she takes you seriously.

    Thanks for the concern! However this how I lost weight in the first place. I much prefer this WOE. I love to eat, I'm not very active, and so I'm left with a tdee of 1600-1700. If I were to restrict everyday, mfp gave me a number of 1300. 1300?!!!! No way. Too low for the whole week.
  • LeeAnne210
    LeeAnne210 Posts: 40
    You're 21 years old, she can't throw you anywhere. Involuntary commitment is not going to happen.

    You are your own woman. Instead of having a cache of slender explanations, ignore her, minimize your time with her, don't waste precious energy on this. Don't play her game. Disengage.

    I am genuinely concerned about your sister, though. Since you used the term anorexic, you must be in some agreement with your stepmother that your sister might not be well. Have you talked to your sister about this? Is she getting any kind of treatment?

    Your goal doesn't seem dangerous for yourself, but I'll defer to others who are your height. I'm really tall so obviously my weight goal is different.

    I must rephrase, my sister WAS anorexic. So based on past experiences she's dictating my future. I'm not my sister. I could never live of apples and water, I don't even like apples. Eeuw. I prefer bananas. Mmmm ... Carbs... :bigsmile:
  • oedipa_maas
    oedipa_maas Posts: 577 Member

    I must rephrase, my sister WAS anorexic. So based on past experiences she's dictating my future. I'm not my sister. I could never live of apples and water, I don't even like apples. Eeuw. I prefer bananas. Mmmm ... Carbs... :bigsmile:

    I can't really blame your stepmother for worrying. Anorexia is the most lethal of all mental illnesses. I'm a little confused at your blithe tone here. Anyway, maybe you should take to her calmly and honestly. A good conversation may solve some of this.
  • LeeAnne210
    LeeAnne210 Posts: 40

    I must rephrase, my sister WAS anorexic. So based on past experiences she's dictating my future. I'm not my sister. I could never live of apples and water, I don't even like apples. Eeuw. I prefer bananas. Mmmm ... Carbs... :bigsmile:

    I can't really blame your stepmother for worrying. Anorexia is the most lethal of all mental illnesses. I'm a little confused at your blithe tone here. Anyway, maybe you should take to her calmly and honestly. A good conversation may solve some of this.

    Yeah that's why I've been looking for excuses. Because I don't want to hurt her feelings I realize she's just concerned for me.
  • LeeAnne210
    LeeAnne210 Posts: 40
    Anyway, maybe you should take to her calmly and honestly. A good conversation may solve some of this.

    Sadly, she's not much for talking. I've tried this already and she just told me I can lose 2 more pounds but no more than that. "Otherwise I will develop problems..." :huh:
  • casy84
    casy84 Posts: 290 Member
    Your weight is a personal matter. As long as you're healthy you shouldn't have to justify your choice to anyone. I'm sure you're life's mission isn't to make you mil happy, so just ignore her and do what you want.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    Anyway, maybe you should take to her calmly and honestly. A good conversation may solve some of this.

    Sadly, she's not much for talking. I've tried this already and she just told me I can lose 2 more pounds but no more than that. "Otherwise I will develop problems..." :huh:

    as previously stated, you're an adult... you are responsible for your own body... not your stepmum.
  • thisonewillwork
    thisonewillwork Posts: 74 Member
    Who's to say that you will ever lose more than 2 pounds when she notices a weight loss? Just say you've lost 2 or less pounds if you want to keep her happy. But you should consider behaving more like an independent adult and doing your own thing regardless of her opinions. Break free. :happy:

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