It was supposed to be a good thing......

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tolygal
tolygal Posts: 602 Member
in Motivation and Support
12 years ago I was in fabulous shape. I was lean and strong and I looked great. Well, there was this wonderful outfit that I wore to a wedding, and it's been in my closet since that day, and I haven't looked at it since (it's on a hanger inside of a bag, so I can't even see it). I've been so excited to fit back into that outfit when I hit my goal weight (20 pounds away). It's been something that was really important to me - I just knew that when I could fit into it, I'd have done it! I'd look outstanding again and I'd be right where I wanted to be! Well, today I pulled it out just for fun...just to see how far I had to go. I knew it wouldn't fit. I knew I wouldn't even be able to get it over my hips. Well, I'm extremely sad to say that it fit. It was not tight at all - and in fact was maybe a little loose. I was very disapointed. I just don't understand....

This is supposed to be a good thing, right? It fits me. Well then why am I so sad? It's not a good thing at all! I don't understand how I can look like I do now (without clothes) and fit into this outfit. My arms are flabby and fat still. My belly is not tiny and hard like it was then. My legs, while no longer as "chunky" are still not lean and hard like I remember them. And my butt...well, I'll always have a big butt, but it's not "there" yet either. So why the heck does this outfit fit me??? Is it because I'm older (I'm 37 now)? Is it because the weight I gained has ruined my body and I'll never get that toned look? Or is the image I had of myself in my mind just some figment of my imagination??? What gives? I've been starting to think that after this 20 pounds is gone, I'd be happy with what I looked like (naked - I know I'll be happy with what I look like in clothes). Now I'm wondering if that will ever happen. I'm not giving up. I just feel really deflated.

Do you think weight training will help? I work out quite a bit (at least 6 hours a week) and do get a little strength work build in, but nothing that I could call out as strenght training. But I didn't then either. In fact, I work out WAY longer and WAY harder now than I ever did back then. Do I just need to work even harder? Will I ever get my old body back? I know it won't be exactly the same, but I thought it would get pretty close. Now I'm not so sure.

Replies

  • orange_avocado
    orange_avocado Posts: 232
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    I would definitely start integrating more Strength Training into your workouts. If your primary focus is cardio, you'll lose bodyfat, but not gain any muscle. Although I'm not an expert, I'd guess that 12 years ago your skin probably had more elasticity and "fit" you better than you're seeing now. If you add it ST, it'll help tighten and tone everything and get you closer to the look you want.

    Good luck and congrats on fitting into the outfit! I know I felt a little disappointed when I could pull on my "skinny" jeans and still felt like I hadn't achieved anything. But if we keep our goal in mind, we'll get there eventually!
  • Enigmatica
    Enigmatica Posts: 879 Member
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    I lost about the same amount of weight that you're aiming for, but I'm more than a decade older. And no doubt in my mind, age and hormonal changes make a big difference over the years. Losing the weight was one thing - getting the tone and shape I want has taken longer. But it has happened. So keep working at it!
  • nickiejohnson
    nickiejohnson Posts: 58
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    First of all, I think you need to do what I am about to do and CONGRATULATE yourself!! You've done a wonderful job! I also have an outfit that I can't wait to fit into.
    I would recommend doing some strength training if you're still not happy with your muscle tone and are still a little soft. Strength training tones and firms your muscles! I would also keep doing what ever youre doing but switch a couple of cardio work outs with some strength training. Age does have an effect on skin elasiticy but that just means you'll have to work a little harder to get it toned.
    I really don't think you're giving yourself credit where its due! You've done a wonderful job so far and the fact that your dream outfit was loose on you is a major accomplishment!! Good for you!!!!
  • RMinVA
    RMinVA Posts: 1,085 Member
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    I lost about the same amount of weight that you're aiming for, but I'm more than a decade older. And no doubt in my mind, age and hormonal changes make a big difference over the years. Losing the weight was one thing - getting the tone and shape I want has taken longer. But it has happened. So keep working at it!

    Ditto!! Our bodies just change over time, that's the way it is. But you can get there, you just have to work a little bit harder and longer for it.
  • erikblock
    erikblock Posts: 230 Member
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    I think trying to regain the body you had then might be an unrealistic goal, which might be setting you up for disappointment regardless of the goals you attain and the amazing things you do for your body. A more realistic goal might be to simply be happy (happier?) with the way you look now, without drawing any sort of comparisons to how you looked then.

    In high school, I weighed 135 pounds. I was in wrestling, track, cross country, and karate, and I lifted weights regularly. I was in pretty darn good shape, and I didn't look too bad (if I do say so myself). I would LOVE to look like that again, but I don't really consider that a realistic goal. I weigh about 190 now, and if I could get down to my goal weight of 165-170, I think I will feel happy with how I look, despite the fact that I won't look anywhere near as thin and "ripped" as I did then.

    Focus on what you've done rather than what you haven't done. Compare how good you look now to how good you DIDN'T look at your highest weight, rather than comparing to the ultra-fit you from years ago.

    I definitely feel where you're coming from, though. When I look in the mirror, I often think "I weigh like 20 pounds less than I did 6 months ago...why don't I like the way I look?" But then, I look at pictures of me at my heaviest, and the way I look now doesn't seem so bad. :)

    Hope this helps. And good luck with continuing to attain your goals.

    -Erik
  • HollyMac20
    HollyMac20 Posts: 259 Member
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    You have done such a great job so far, don't let this get you down!!! You have worked so hard to lose the weight you have. I think strength training is a great idea. No guarentee it will get you to where you were before, but you will feel stronger, tighter and toned. Keep up the great work!
  • edorice
    edorice Posts: 4,519 Member
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    You need to lift weights to tighten up your body.
  • tolygal
    tolygal Posts: 602 Member
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    Thanks everyone...really!! I'm definetly going to get some more strength work in. I just have to figure out how to do it. I'm clueless!! And I'm so stuck on the cardio, it's hard to give up any of that time. But I suppose it's what I need to do. I did win a personal training session at my gym. Seems like a good place to start :-)
  • edorice
    edorice Posts: 4,519 Member
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    The Chalean Extreme DVD would incorporate cardio and weights.

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