kinda wanna stop trying

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Lindzpnc
Lindzpnc Posts: 98 Member
in Motivation and Support
my 30th bday is coming up and last night I went to walk around the mall with my 6month old while her dad worked out at the gym, I was just browsing some stores to see if I could possibly find a dress for my 30th bday...

I was sooo disappointed that I walked into three stores and the biggest size they carried was Large... Ive been working so hard and the weight has come off but Im at a point where im just over it!

Im over always obsessing about my weight.... maybe im just destined to be this way.

Im not saying im going to turn around and stuff my face with oreos or UNDO all my hard work but honestly feels like I will never fit into clothes at these stores im just built big or something...

ughh this is just a VENT

I know I will keep going but it was just discouraging is all
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Replies

  • _Waffle_
    _Waffle_ Posts: 13,049 Member
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    honestly feels like I will never fit into clothes at these stores im just built big or something...

    Don't accept that illusion of reality. That's just what people tell themselves as a reason for giving up. You're not built big. There's no such thing. If you decide to keep trying or give up the time will still pass either way. You can be saying the same thing in a couple years or you can keep working on it and perhaps by then you'll be wearing a medium dress or smaller. How bad do you want it?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsSC2vx7zFQ
  • Veil5577
    Veil5577 Posts: 868 Member
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    I know how you feel. I've been feeling that way lately too. Seems like the logging and trying to stick below the calorie limit is a total waste of time, and I don't feel like I'm logging accurately because I don't own a food scale like everyone else seems to.

    But I have given up twice before and this time I promised myself that no matter how discouraged I get or how many times I fall off the wagon, I will not give up. Once before I got down to a size 4. Yes, I used Ephedra at the time to do it, but that was the "crutch" that created the calorie deficit I needed.

    I don't have Ephedra this time but I can still do this without it. It's just going to take more willpower and motivation.

    You can do this too. Just think how bad it will feel if you give up.
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
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    It took me 3 years to lose the weight. I always thought I was built big (I sort of am because I'm tall), but clothes really do fit well when the fat is gone. I will always be in size Large (I was even at 16% body fat). There's no shame in the size. Keep taking it a day at a time. Your baby is only 6 months old. Keep working at it and you will lose the weight. Go to bed every night saying you will do it again tomorrow.
  • nysngl
    nysngl Posts: 1
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    Uggggh I know the feeling I work out five to six times a week and I watch my kcals and yet this morning I seem to have put on another three pounds! Totally ruined my mood for the day ! I find my self not even wanting to go to the gym now, I will n
    But it is a struggle right now. On a lighter note some did tell me I look smaller so I guess I am losing inches.
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
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    Make sure that you have your goals set up appropriately. It can be helpful in the long run.
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants
  • wizzybeth
    wizzybeth Posts: 3,573 Member
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    Well to comment on a comment - a food scale is a very cheap investment. I have had mine since I tried Weight Watchers nearly 10 years ago...it comes in handy for a lot of things, and at this point it owes me nothing. If I need to replace it I will happily spend the $15 to do it.

    Wanting to give up - yeah, I've been there, and I've done that. I'm back after my last bout with giving up, lol...and had to re-lose weight I'd already lost by the last time I gave up.

    I too get frustrated by the clothing choices. I can't always afford to spend the $$$ to shop at stores specifically for larger women that actually have appealing clothes. That's actually one of my motivators - being able to shop at just normal stores. I don't expect to do it any time soon...but hopefully in 6 months time I'll be out of the 22x or XXXL sizes and down into Extra Large. :) Which most places DO carry. And then I aim to get to L a few months after that...and hopefully by this time next year, I'll be back in my original Medium size.

    This is a good thing - post here that you FEEL like giving up. It's good to get it out. But don't actually give up. :)
  • pawoodhull
    pawoodhull Posts: 1,759 Member
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    I see a couple things in your post. Discouragement and denial. I understand the discouragement. I lose slowly and stall often and 3 years after starting this program I have lost 161 pounds, but still have 65 to go to goal. I too get discouraged. It's not happening fast enough for us. But what really helps is focusing on what I have lost, that I've gone from a size 34 to an 18, I'm mobile again.

    As for denial let me tell you, it's so easy to say I'm big boned, it's just water weight, etc. Truth is your body type may never fit into a an XS or a size zero, but you probably can get into a medium or large given enough time, the right plan and some consistent exercise. This should be more about being healthy than a specific size. I will never be model thin, but I'm OK with that. As long as I can shop in normal stores rather than fat people stores and I am healthy and mobile, then my weight loss has been a success.

    One more thing. You have a 6 month old. What kind of an example do you want to be to your little one? Do you want to show that child what a healthy lifestyle is with good healthy food, healthy portions, and being active on a regular basis (exercising)? Or do you want your child to grow up with a fat mom who doesn't teach them how to be healthy. Let me tell you, I was the fat mom, I didn't teach my kids how to be a normal weight. And now my youngest daughter, who has my body type and my weight issues is doing the same thing with her kids. And why? Because I set a horrible example and I taught her how to be fat. You are at the beginning, make a better choice than I did.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    We have all been there. It's can be a huge amount of effort in the beginning and the results are so slow. I wish I could fast-forward a year and show you what the accumulated results of all your choices now will look like. Your jaw will drop.

    So let's pretend I'm your future self (because I could be). YOU'VE GOT THIS!

    ...and thanks so much!!! I'm so grateful for what you did every day. I can't believe that you overcame all the obstacles that you thought you had, but you did and I'm so much stronger and just feel better as a result.
  • jumbojimbo5016
    jumbojimbo5016 Posts: 1 Member
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    Based on the other posts, I'm sure you can see that many of have been in the same boat you are right now. One thing to keep in mind is that you're only going to be 30. Keeping on with your efforts to lose weight now will definitely be easier than if you do like some of us (me) and wait until you're in your mid 40s to try and start losing. Its tougher as you get older because (1) Your metabolism is probably going to slow down and (2) the longer you wait, the longer it takes to "unlearn" the habits that we developed to gain the weight in the first place. I know you're frustrated at the moment, but keep on pushing. You'll be glad that you didn't give up on yourself.
  • RobinLillySue
    RobinLillySue Posts: 3 Member
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    I found a great food scale from Goodwill store! (In the US, Goodwill is a re-sale store/ second hand!).
  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member
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    my 30th bday is coming up and last night I went to walk around the mall with my 6month old while her dad worked out at the gym, I was just browsing some stores to see if I could possibly find a dress for my 30th bday...

    I was sooo disappointed that I walked into three stores and the biggest size they carried was Large... Ive been working so hard and the weight has come off but Im at a point where im just over it!

    Im over always obsessing about my weight.... maybe im just destined to be this way.

    Im not saying im going to turn around and stuff my face with oreos or UNDO all my hard work but honestly feels like I will never fit into clothes at these stores im just built big or something...

    ughh this is just a VENT

    I know I will keep going but it was just discouraging is all

    Instead of going to stores that you know you won't fit into, go to a store you know you will. That way you won't become depressed when nothing fits. There are many stores that sell plus-size clothing. Lane Bryant has a lot of nice clothes, especially dresses.
  • CupcakeCrusoe
    CupcakeCrusoe Posts: 1,355 Member
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    I feel the way you do a lot.

    What keeps me going is, as others have mentioned, how far I've come, with that same mentality. Keep on keepin' on, until you start to see results. After that, those results keep you going. I've lost 50 lbs. I've got another 20-30 to go. Sometimes I despair, then I realize I'm in a size 10 (ish) again. I haven't been that small since before high school.

    Keep going. Don't quit until you're healthy and satisfied with your results.
  • Lindzpnc
    Lindzpnc Posts: 98 Member
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    THank you... aghhh im in tears! not bad tears.. just tears I realizing how hard this is and the determination and discipline it requires
  • pawoodhull
    pawoodhull Posts: 1,759 Member
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    THank you... aghhh im in tears! not bad tears.. just tears I realizing how hard this is and the determination and discipline it requires

    It is hard, but oh so worth it! You can do this for yourself and for your baby. You will look better yes, but most impotantly you will feel better both physically and emotionally. And what a great example you will set for your baby! Hang in there girl! I believe in you!
  • Meerataila
    Meerataila Posts: 1,885 Member
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    If you can't make it into a clothing size you want for your birthday, it might help to pick a different occasion to strive toward. Labor Day if you're American? Halloween? Winter Holidays? That might help you push on forward.
  • sarah2954
    sarah2954 Posts: 291 Member
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    If you can't make it into a clothing size you want for your birthday, it might help to pick a different occasion to strive toward. Labor Day if you're American? Halloween? Winter Holidays? That might help you push on forward.

    Not Halloween... all the girl costumes are skanky :wink:
  • yellowlemoned
    yellowlemoned Posts: 335 Member
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    You can do this, and so many of us are here trying our bests to do it with you. I go through periods of doubting my ability to deal with the stress of trying to lose weight, and wanting to just give up too. Everybody does. It's what we do to get through those rough patches that matters. I once went from a size 20 to a size 14 when I was in college. I wanted to lose weight but I got lazy and gave up and convinced myself that I couldn't be smaller than a size 14 no matter how hard I tried. Then I got pregnant and ended up in a size 20 again. I got lazy and depressed after that and allowed myself to balloon up to a size 26, and barely squeezing into them. Since then I'm back down to a size 20/22 again, and while I definitely want to give up some days, I know it will be worth it in the long run to get myself back into those size 14 jeans and even smaller. Like someone else said, not everybody is meant to wear a size 0 or xs, especially those of use with larger chests, but there is no reason I can't wear a size large. Don't give up, and if you want, send a friend request and we'll get through this together and help each other get back into "normal sizes." :) We've got this!
  • amandab8503
    amandab8503 Posts: 2 Member
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    Do not be discouraged! You have a six-month old baby. You are you're baby's role model. You need to love yourself, have confidence and accept yourself so that your baby does the same. The weight will come off if you're eating healthy and working out. I know that sounds so cliche but that's the truth. I don't know if you're nursing, but in my case, I actually gained weight while I nursed--a lot of weight. Enjoy your baby and the rest will follow. When your baby starts walking, you will be on your feet none stop chasing after your little one. Does your gym have a day care? Utilize it! Even if you're not feeling it that day, walk on the treadmill and watch TV. At least that's something. Also, do NOT pay attention to sizes. It's a mind trip. They're not even uniform. You can be a size small at the GAP, but an extra-large at Forever 21. Have fun on your birthday mama and try your hardest to ignore the negative thoughts re. body image.
  • Meerataila
    Meerataila Posts: 1,885 Member
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    If you can't make it into a clothing size you want for your birthday, it might help to pick a different occasion to strive toward. Labor Day if you're American? Halloween? Winter Holidays? That might help you push on forward.

    Not Halloween... all the girl costumes are skanky :wink:

    Hey nothing wrong with a day of skank every year! :bigsmile:
  • mlanders22
    mlanders22 Posts: 140 Member
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    You're not alone and this weight loss roller coaster is a struggle for all of us at one point or another. Like you, I sometimes feel that I'm just always going to be large. Now, granted, I have lost 80 pounds, but that has been a long and slow process (started in October 2012). Some days I feel since I'm not where I want to be after almost two years, I will probably never get there. But then I realize how far I've come and even slow progress, is still progress. If I had kept on the path I was on back in September 2012, I'd probably be over 300 pounds by now, not able to keep up with my toddler, and wishing I had started trying to do something about my weight.
    Focus on why you want to make healthy changes. For you, for your family, and for your health. Hang in there!

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