Exercise and anxiety.

I struggle with anxiety a lot. I'd like to go to a gym but the idea is too daunting. I've only exercised using the Wii in my own home in recent years.

My boyfriend has offered to go with me the first few times so I can feel more comfortable about going alone but I still feel panicked by the idea.

Any tips on how I can exercise comfortably or find a way to go to the gym with confidence?

Replies

  • sidney7305
    sidney7305 Posts: 36 Member
    Generally, I prefer to go to the gym during low peak times. If you go during off hours there won't be many people there.
  • Cyclingbonnie
    Cyclingbonnie Posts: 413 Member
    Sweet boyfriend, trying to help. Okay, question here is the anxiety about your insecurity of your appearance/fitness level or it is a general anxiety that would exist anyway. If it is about appearance/fitness level know that no one is looking and no one is judging. In gym situations people are completely self absorbed in what they are doing. If it is something that you do not think will change don't beat yourself up about it. Use the money you would spend on a gym membership to purchase things for your home.
  • mzbek24
    mzbek24 Posts: 436 Member
    I feel you...that's why I prefer to exercise alone. This comes from some of my experience dealing with anxiety with psychologists before.

    With the anxiety about the gym, if beating it is important to you I believe the best thing would be exposure in small amounts, and gradually work your way up. You could go in for a few mins, take your bf and try it out to see how it feels. Next time go a little bit longer and so on.
    Also could be a good idea to take some music and headphones and or try to focus in mindfully on something particular such as on your workout, your body, sounds around you, your breathing to 10 and starting again at 1 for the duration, or you could sing along in your head to your music that you enjoy...that way u have something to think about other than the negative thoughts or emotions that you might be having. Hope this helps :)

    Alternatively, I usually power walk, run or cycle, and do weights at home too. You don't have to go to a gym to get fit. Could you power walk or jog in your area? an hour brisk walk each morning would burn probably about 500 cals, does for me but of course everybody is different and burn will be different for your weight and pace, terrain etc, just a rough guide anyway.
    Perhaps you could do it with your bf too. It's great he has been so supportive of you. Sounds like a keeper. Best of luck :)
  • scolloby
    scolloby Posts: 22 Member
    If you haven't tried running before then I'd suggest the C25K program - no gym - no fee - just you (and your boyfriend if he's up for it) learning to run and building endurance. You just need a good pair of running shoes and cheap shorts/tights and a top. Just Google it. I started on it 8 weeks ago and since I've been doing the longer runs I can honestly say that my head is getting calmer with much less anxiety and negativity poking it's nose in - I'm finding some naturally induced peace and my blood pressure is better too. It raises your self-esteem and so from there you might then have confidence to enter a gym, if you feel you want to. Otherwise you can find exercises you can do at home online.
  • jsmommy1999
    jsmommy1999 Posts: 35 Member
    If you don't mind my asking what kind of gym do you belong to? I used to struggle with the same issue and used to only work out at places like Women' Workout World, Curves, etc. I belonged to XSport for a while and, even though I was in good shape, felt very out of place. A gym like your local YMCA should contain a very good mix of people - many seniors and even very obese people trying to get into shape for health reasons. The same people tend to be there everyday and form friendships and often even spend time together outside the gym. Lastly, I think you will find that in general athletes are very supportive, kind people. I think the only person judging you is you.

    Good Luck!
  • smetka01
    smetka01 Posts: 99 Member
    You can also try workout dvd. I love Shaun T :wink:
    You can buy also dumbbells and do a lot of different exercises at home. It works for me and is easier to manage.
  • SyntonicGarden
    SyntonicGarden Posts: 944 Member
    A couple of things:

    1) Start small and low key, so as not to trigger your anxiety even more. This way, you'll get more comfortable with the gym. After some time (A week? Two? A month?) start to branch out to other equipment.

    2) Comfy gym clothes. Black / dark yoga pants (so you don't have to worry about gym shorts riding up) and a comfy t-shirt. If you're there with your boyfriend and not to meet someone, it's ok to be comfortable. :)

    3) A headset that you can plug into a treadmill/elliptical. Alternatively, if you have a device that plays music, bring that. If you're focused on the music or a tv show, it's easier to relax and not get caught up in everything else.

    4) Find out if the gym offers any kind of training session to show you how to use the less-than-intuitive equipment, so that you develop good form and don't injure yourself. Some gyms also have file folders that you can keep sheets to track your workout in. Some people use notebooks. This way, you have a visual representation of where you're at. That might help build confidence and reduce anxiety. :)

    Exercise can be awesome for helping folks with anxiety, simply because of all of the wonderful things that it does to the body and the chemicals in the brain. :)
  • rybo
    rybo Posts: 5,424 Member
    There are a lot of ways to get fit w/o going to the gym
  • 3laine75
    3laine75 Posts: 3,069 Member
    Have a look at 'I am the woman in the free weights section'. - it's one of the stickies (Sorry I don't know how to post a link on this machine).

    Good advice in there for you :)
  • yogicarl
    yogicarl Posts: 1,260 Member
    I get the same anxiety whenever I go to the local pool - and I have been going to the pool for over ten years. I have found that I have to just switch off how I feel about going and just go on auto-pilot. I know that when I get there and enter the first pool length, it all goes away and I am always glad I went.
  • kefryar
    kefryar Posts: 77 Member
    I have a diagnosed anxiety and panic disorder-I'm on medication for it but I still have panic attacks, so I know how you feel. Not fun.
    I have noticed that working out helps this more than anything I've tried, so it's really in your best interest to go to the gym. It doesn't matter how many times I go, I will always get butterflies pulling into the parking lot. It helps me to remind myself that a. I feel so much less anxious after working out, and b. everyone is in the gym for themselves, not to look at you.

    That being said, you have to find a gym that doesn't make you nervous. I used to go to a body building gym and it was terrible. Every time you walked in the door personal trainers attacked you to find out when you'd be booking a session with them (I won't be, you cost $280 an hour) and I had more comments made about my butt TO MY FACE than I could count. For some reason to these guys "your butt looks great" translated into a compliment and NOT sexual harassment. I got so uncomfortable after a year that I just cancelled my membership. So about a month ago I joined the YMCA and it is SO much better. First of all they don't have a serious personal trainer program, so you don't have to worry about being harassed. Also I've noticed that the clients at the Y are a little older, usually with families so you don't have to really worry about being hit on or creeped on.

    Maybe you could try the Y, or possibly curves or something that caters to women? I do know that the Rush has women only workout rooms. Just try and remember that the reason people go to the gym is the same reason you are going: to relieve stress and get and stay healthy. Honestly, the only thing I've ever thought at the gym ab another person is "wow they look great" or "wow, good for them for being here".

    Best of luck, I understand how daunting trying anything new can be with an anxiety disorder. Also, your bf is a keeper for understanding your problem-I've noticed that's hard to come by with disorders like these.
  • kefryar
    kefryar Posts: 77 Member
    Oh, also I've noticed that I feel more confident at the gym if i'm wearing actual work out clothes vs sweats and a tshirt. Go invest some money in some nice compression gymwear (it's on sale at old navy right now) and I promise it'll make a 100% difference in how you feel.
  • laurenb1994
    laurenb1994 Posts: 40 Member
    Its a general anxiety. I struggle leaving the house to do anything alone.

    In the past I enjoyed going to Zumba with my sister but she moved away and I have no one else I could go with. The issue with my boyfriend coming along is finding time when he's not at work and my mum is available to babysit for us.

    Thanks for all the tips and advice though everyone. I appreciate it.
  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member
    I would suggest going to Zumba alone, if you liked it. I bet if you look around the room, most of the people came alone. It's scary the first time or two but soon you'll feel like, "What was I afraid of?" And it's a great feeling of accomplishment to face and conquer your fear and will help for the next one. You'll have that success to think back to.

    I used to fear the gym and then the yoga studio. Then you go a few times and kind of laugh at yourself, because no one there is intimidating or cares the least about what you're doing or look like.

    Good luck!
  • kriskris92
    kriskris92 Posts: 190 Member
    I also have anxiety, and choose to work out primarily at home, using a variety of dvds and youtube videos. I take advantage of the warm weather and walk outside a lot as well. If you want to push yourself and go to the gym, I would recommend maybe finding a trainer for a couple sessions so you won't be alone, and you then don't have to worry about figuring out what to do or how to do it. When I go to a new gym, the first few times I go, I usually just find a treadmill/bike/rower and do that for a while and scope out the rest of the gym - seeing where/when is usually busy, what other people are doing, who are the friendlier employees if you need to ask questions, etc. It helps me feel a little more comfortable when I'm ready to move off the treadmill. Good luck whatever you choose!
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    Any tips on how I can exercise comfortably or find a way to go to the gym with confidence?

    Yes, a medical professional's counseling services.
  • 1911JR
    1911JR Posts: 276
    I struggle with anxiety a lot. I'd like to go to a gym but the idea is too daunting. I've only exercised using the Wii in my own home in recent years.

    My boyfriend has offered to go with me the first few times so I can feel more comfortable about going alone but I still feel panicked by the idea.

    Any tips on how I can exercise comfortably or find a way to go to the gym with confidence?

    Go to the gym, put in your ear buds and get on a treadmill or elliptical. Put your blinders on and ignore everything around you. Focus on your movement and what your listening to, and nothing else. And repeat this method until you become comfortable. And then slowly expand your areas.

    Best of luck....
  • LAT1963
    LAT1963 Posts: 1,375 Member
    I'll second the YMCA as being less intimidating for beginners than many general gyms. The original mission of the Y is to provide a place for *kids* to hang out and do sports, so they make an effort to be a gym for *families* not young men who want to be bad-*kitten*. Most have also incorporated senior centers. The weightlifting machines have size limits rather than age limits (you must be this tall to ride this ride) and some kids will be among the lifters, as well as many seniors. Basic training (and retraining if you forget) in how to use the equipment is included in the membership fee; some general gyms nickle and dime you to death for every little bit of help they offer.

    If you "struggle with anxiety a lot" then you probably should have a doc or counselor work with you on how to keep your anxiety in check so it does not interfere with your life. You may never get rid of it entirely but you don't want it to keep you from living life, either.

    add: and to third, forth, fifth, seventh, or whatever--people at the gym are there to work out. They come in, do their thing, and leave. They're not there to oggle other people. Now, on occasion you will find a gym that people use as a 'hook up joint', in which case, go to a different gym.

    Some 24-hour gyms these days are basically stand-alone small but complete weight rooms, and with membership you get a personalized magnetic key. The front desk is staffed only limited hours out of the day. Because the membership is small and staffing light, you can go to these gyms and literally be the only person there, if you go at off-peak hours. If your issue is that you feel watched, this format might help you. On the other hand some people get anxious if they are alone. Depends on what triggers your anxiety.
  • Veil5577
    Veil5577 Posts: 868 Member
    I suffer from social anxiety disorder and I know how you feel.. there is NO WAY I would go to a gym, especially alone. I walk at home in my neighborhood and I have free weights at home. If I ever get to the point where I can jog I'm going to do it very late at night or earlier in the morning when it is still dark.
  • bigblondewolf
    bigblondewolf Posts: 268 Member
    I know exactly how you feel. I used to have severe anxiety disorder from a small child until I was about 18. Going anywhere new or special (eg. starting a new school year, going out on a date, an unexpected trip to a theme park) would make me violently sick to my stomach. I used to avoid events like these until I realized one day that I hated the life I was living.

    So I went places. Not gonna lie - I ended up vomiting in a lot of public places because of it. But I had supportive friends who stood by me (like your boyfriend is doing for you) and eventually it didn't feel as scary. I started my first day of university anxiety free :)

    I guess what I'm saying here is - if you want to go to the gym then go! Take your boyfriend with you and just start simple. Make a playlist of your favourite music to tune out the gym noises and do something simple that doesn't involve too much thinking or interaction with others (think the treadmill or a stationary bike). Once you become comfortable with that then move on to something that's a little more challenging.

    Just remember that no one is judging you, and you have all of the control.
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    I struggle with anxiety a lot. I'd like to go to a gym but the idea is too daunting.

    Ironically, working out is what helps me alleviate my anxiety. Just find what your comfort zone is with going and then slowly build from there. Starting out with the BF sounds good.
  • LAT1963
    LAT1963 Posts: 1,375 Member
    I suffer from social anxiety disorder and I know how you feel.. there is NO WAY I would go to a gym, especially alone. I walk at home in my neighborhood and I have free weights at home. If I ever get to the point where I can jog I'm going to do it very late at night or earlier in the morning when it is still dark.

    Check into Snap fitness and similar 'latch-key' gyms.
  • merfhur
    merfhur Posts: 53 Member
    I also suffer from anxiety and the first time I went to the gym I sat in the changing room for about 15 minutes trying to get myself together and I nearly went home straight away again!

    My advice would be to go when it's not very busy which is what I tend to do, if you're worried about people watching you/judging you then don't!
    No-one really pays attention to anyone else, everyone is there for their own workout!
  • randomthings
    randomthings Posts: 2 Member
    Its a general anxiety. I struggle leaving the house to do anything alone.

    In the past I enjoyed going to Zumba with my sister but she moved away and I have no one else I could go with. The issue with my boyfriend coming along is finding time when he's not at work and my mum is available to babysit for us.

    Thanks for all the tips and advice though everyone. I appreciate it.

    Been there, so I definitely know exactly how you feel. While you work to get your anxiety more under control I would suggest trying to work out at home. This may sound counter-intuitive, but address your anxiety first, then address going to a gym. If every time you go to the gym you are overwhelmed with anxiety not only will your workout be poor but you may begin having additional anxiety about feeling anxious. It's a vicious cycle and it will need to be broken.
  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member
    The only way to overcome your anxiety and fear of leaving the house alone is to just do it. You don't want to become an agoraphobic at such a young age.

    Start by going for walks in your neighborhood. Take someone with you the first couple times and then go by yourself. Then work your way up to going to the gym. Again, take someone with you the first couple times. When you feel comfortable, go by yourself. Even if you are only there for 10 or 20 minutes. The most important thing is that you STAY no matter how much anxiety you are experiencing. When you flee, you are teaching your body that it is unsafe (fight or flight response) which it is not. Is it uncomfortable? Yes. Is it scary? Yes. Can you do it? Absolutely.

    Look into CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). It's basically exposing you to your fears. It has helped me get my life back after suffering from severe generalized anxiety and panic disorder.
  • MrTolerable
    MrTolerable Posts: 1,593 Member
    I struggle with anxiety a lot. I'd like to go to a gym but the idea is too daunting. I've only exercised using the Wii in my own home in recent years.

    My boyfriend has offered to go with me the first few times so I can feel more comfortable about going alone but I still feel panicked by the idea.

    Any tips on how I can exercise comfortably or find a way to go to the gym with confidence?

    ^initially what helped me get into the gym was my doctor saying I had to due to my over analyzing everything - it lead to a constant state of anxiety.

    The gym will greatly increase your confidence while simultaneously decreasing your anxiety.


    I won't say don't worry about not being anxious your first time there - I was, and I was for the first few times as well. I will say, everyone there knows they started sometime themselves, and they are all typically really nice guys like me who would assist and provide input if you inquire about how to use something - but overall we are super zoned out with our heads in outer-space worried only about getting that bar up again.

    GL :flowerforyou:
  • MrTolerable
    MrTolerable Posts: 1,593 Member
    The only way to overcome your anxiety and fear of leaving the house alone is to just do it. You don't want to become an agoraphobic at such a young age.

    Start by going for walks in your neighborhood. Take someone with you the first couple times and then go by yourself. Then work your way up to going to the gym. Again, take someone with you the first couple times. When you feel comfortable, go by yourself. Even if you are only there for 10 or 20 minutes. The most important thing is that you STAY no matter how much anxiety you are experiencing. When you flee, you are teaching your body that it is unsafe (fight or flight response) which it is not. Is it uncomfortable? Yes. Is it scary? Yes. Can you do it? Absolutely.

    Look into CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). It's basically exposing you to your fears. It has helped me get my life back after suffering from severe generalized anxiety and panic disorder.

    ^this was a terrific post. :drinker:
  • Beautifulbridgittlee7
    Beautifulbridgittlee7 Posts: 352 Member
    I suggest swimming and wearing headphones if you do any of the cardio/strength machines, or you can workout in your apartment or outdoors. I've suffered from anxiety/depression and most people aren't concerned wit you. You should be able to do what activities you wasn't without worrying about someone else. Maybe someday you might like the group fitness classes if you find the people and staff friendly.
  • WalkingAlong
    WalkingAlong Posts: 4,926 Member
    Look into CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). It's basically exposing you to your fears. It has helped me get my life back after suffering from severe generalized anxiety and panic disorder.
    I agree. I've seen doctors for generalized anxiety and taken my teen (as recently as last week). They always recommend CBT. We have a lot of good books of CBT exercises. It's the best treatment I've found.
  • RLMsFitnessPal
    RLMsFitnessPal Posts: 81 Member
    I also struggle with depression and anxiety. I understand the frustration you feel when it interferes with your ability to function.

    Do you have other family or friends who workout at a gym or would be willing to go? Maybe you could get together with them when your boyfriend has to work. Another option would be to find a social support group that can help you set goals to overcome your anxiety.