Hopeless?

It's not hopeless. I'm sure it seems like it now, but it can get better.
I am not a stranger to eating myself sick. I don't think that people who have never been here before understand that this is something that is harder to control than simple will-power. When I would go into binge mode (it still happens occasionally, but not as frequently), it was like I wasn't myself... like I could not control my urge to eat and I would ravage anything and everything I could get my hands on, like I had not eaten in days. I would eat until I felt disgusting and sick to my stomach, wait for it to pass, then eat some more. I truly believe that it is a sickness that needs to be conquered mentally, in addition to physically. If I were out with friends, I would eat a sensible meal, then pick up a meal (or two) at a different place on the way home and pig out on that.

Here are a couple of things that have helped me:

While I try not to eliminate anything completely from my diet (if I tell myself I can't have it, it makes me want it more), I do have several "trigger foods" that if I have even a little taste of it, I will go out of control and consume way too much. I try my darndest to stay away from these trigger foods. My husband knows what these trigger foods are and helps me through it.

I set my daily calorie goal high enough to where I am still at a deficit (to lose weight), but not so low that I feel deprived or hungry.

I try to get out of the house and stay more active. Rather than sitting in front of the tv eating those little powdered donuts (one of my trigger foods), I will go out for a bike ride or take my dog for a walk.

I still allow myself moments to indulge in sweet treats or have popcorn and a coke at the movie theaters. But, I limit myself a small portion. If I have a large popcorn in front of me, I'm going to eat a large popcorn... so I go for the small.


I know you've probably heard all these before. I just saw myself in your post and felt the need to respond to let you know that it can get better. I still struggle with it at times. I think I always will. But, it's easier now. It's easier to say no. It's easier to have small treats without going out of control. Small changes add up to bigger ones.

I think I know how you feel. I was in a destructive circle of binge eating for years. For the past seven years I have been binging and resolving to do something about it tomorrow/next monday/next year, and so on.

I only broke out of it about three months ago. I am finding it quite easy to stay on track, but then I knew I would...it was just starting that was the problem.

Your situation certainly isn't hopeless - if I can do it, anyone can.

I wish I could offer more advice. But I don't fully understand how and why I broke the cycle myself.

I have been there, I know probably very close to what you are feeling. What it took for me to realize and change was finding out at age 27 I had type 2 diabetes and sleep apnea. I thought no one at my age should have to deal with that stuff. There were days I had the urges but I just had to realize my life was more important than the food I wanted to binge on. I had to find constructive things to do that took my mind off of it. You can do this, its not hopless, I am living proof you can overcome. You have to find your motivation and what makes it worth it to you. It will take life changes and you will test your will power countless times but everytime you overcome a binge and do not cave in you will realize just how strong you are I am 3 years binge free so I know you can do this

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply.
I do often times think if I could just be out of the house at night doing something off of the couch, it would help tremendously. I'm so glad you've found a way to begin to tackle this. It is such a fine line between restricting and avoiding binge foods.
If you don't mind me asking, did you seek any sort of treatment to help, or just made the decisions to get a handle on it with the things you mentioned?
Thanks again!

I did not seek professional help with this, although at times I thought it probably would have helped. I did, however, entrust a close friend or two and my {now} husband to help me get through it. It is still something that I struggle with at times, but those times are now very few and far between.

I too can relate to some of the others posts about always thinking "I'll quit tomorrow" or "I'll start Monday" so I would go crazy with my eating for a couple of days. But "tomorrow" never happened. I would always fall back into my bingeing ways.