Need of some help and advice

needofachange
needofachange Posts: 1
in Health and Weight Loss
Hi all,

I'm 22 and a male. I've reached a very high weight, if im putting it straight its clinically obese. I've been so depressed over the past few year. Yet the more down, the more I eat which is total reverse to how it should be as it should motivate myself to get into shape.

I'm really struggling, I'm scared to go to the doctors, I'm scared to confront friends for advice, same with family. They try and help so much but I just shrug it off for some reason. The last thing I want is sympathy cause I've done this to myself and it's really not as easy as 'stop eating bad and go to the gym then'.

It's like im addicted, I've been on diets such as weight watcher, slimming world, herbalife, cambridge etc, I just fall off eventually.

Even though i'm more or less anonymous I'm too embarrassed to share my weight on here.

Has anyone been in my situation before where you feel stuck and eating yourself into a grave, I keep telling myself 'its not a diet but a life style change'. Yet the next day I feel I have no control.

i know this my sound stupid to some, or lazy and no will power to others. But if you've ever felt like this before and you've managed to change your life to get to the ideal weight you needed, what advice would you give me?

Replies

  • Scribhneoir
    Scribhneoir Posts: 2
    My advice is to squash your fear and see a doctor. You need to deal with your depression before you can concentrate on a weight loss program. I've suffered a couple of bouts of clinical depression in the past; I know how hard it is to even think straight, much less work on a long-term goal.

    In the meantime, perhaps it would be best to make just one small change in your diet. Commit to eating more vegetables, for instance. When your depression is under control, that will be the time to jump into a more comprehensive weight loss program.
  • Booda101
    Booda101 Posts: 161 Member
    Congratulations for finding your way here! I definitely agree with the above write about treating the depression first. And make small changes that you can stick to.

    There is a lot of information here and this is one of the best posts going.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants


    Best of luck to you!
  • djcangel
    djcangel Posts: 800 Member
    Try and Start out by eating loads of low calorie food, check on-line and on-site for low cal options, and eat, eat, eat. Popcorn, salads, veggies, fish...etc. Before you realize it you will cut down on amounts and be losing weight. Stay in touch with the support groups, do not be afraid to see a doctor or do whatever it takes. Exercise, baby steps, do not try to change all at once. And do not feel embarrassed or ashamed to share your story...you could very well be the inspiration for someone else. You are not alone. Best of Luck with your goals.:smile:
  • HeidiCooksSupper
    HeidiCooksSupper Posts: 3,833 Member
    Does anyone else have that feeling? Yes. And yes, I had it in my 20s but no one said back then: go to a doctor, talk to a counselor, treat your depression and learn to love yourself. If they had, I might not have spent all those years self-medicating with food and alcohol.

    Now, we've said that to you. You are most assuredly not alone. You are among friends here, many of whom were exactly where you are when we were in our 20s. The more you hide, the worse it all gets. I know. Coming out of hiding and demanding the professional services you need is hard but its vital.

    A friend helped me get over the guilt and shame of seeking medical and psychological treatment by telling me "A physician is just a highly trained technician you are paying for a service." It's true of medical doctors and its true of psychological counselors. Would you try to repair your car's transmission with kitchen gadgets because you are ashamed to hire someone who knows more about transmissions than you do? No. Same thing's true for our health. Pay someone who knows more than you do to help.

    As to the eating and obesity, that we can work on together here. My tagline on my profile is, "'Self-discipline is not my forte' is a lousy excuse." And those of us who don't have it over something like eating need to work on changing our habits and there isn't any guilt to be had from recognizing that and working on it. It isn't easy for many of us but if we quit trying we'll just make ourselves more unhappy.

    Feel free to friend me and/or message me if you want more of this "old lady's" perspective.

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