Killing depression after 10 years.

When I was younger, I used to weigh 171-190 lbs. in high school weight lifting competitions. In college I weighted 190-210 lbs. I lifted weights for 5 years and I looked great.

One day I became severely depressed (over a girl of course) and then I didn't care about anything. I didn't care about my life. I thought there was nothing I could do to get a girl I liked to like me. So I began eating icecream and I stopped exercising altogether. In 1 month I gained over 60 lbs. (no joke), I ate whole icecream containers everyday. Over the years I tried to lose weight, I would start then stop along the way. Eventually after 10 years I weighed 325-330 lbs.

The night of the change was my mom arguing to me about something I couldn't remember. Somehow she brought up, "What happened to you? You used to be thin!" I was really mad and I yelled, "I became depressed". I stormed away of course but I quickly thought to myself, after all these years am I still depressed? I thought yes. I am very depressed and this is why I am fat. This is why I couldn't move forward with my weight loss in the past. I was very mad at myself and I had enough. I was 100% determined to kill my depression and get my life back.

I weighed 325 lbs. in January and now I weigh 250 lbs. today. I am extremely addicted to exercise. My diet is very strict and overall what I do is very unhealthy. Some days I consume less than 1,500 or even less than 1,000. I will spend hours exercising a day. I went over 30 days with only 3 days off of exercise. I had trained in the past extensively before but never this hard or long. Some days I would sit on a stationary bike and wait until I had passed 2,000 calories. I have played the Wii Active Heavy Boxing for hours in a day while also using the bike. I am positive my calories burned go over a pound of fat in a day. I spend all my available time exercising. I try working out everything I can, abs, back, chest, arms, etc.

But I ignore what other people tell me, because I believe in my results. I lost 75 lbs in 6-7 months and I feel stronger completely. I can bench press and squat more than I did from the day I started to lose weight. I never really feel tired anymore. At first I would get dizzy, and feel sick. But I kept it up until I got used to it. I hardly ever feel hungry. I thought I might not continue with such a low calorie diet (mostly plant food and some protein) but anytime I thought I was feeling tired, I asked myself, "Are you quitting?" NO, I will never quit. I get that boost of energy to continue.

Because I eat so little, my stomach shrunk a lot. My skin had reduced a lot. I can only eat a small handful of food at a time or I feel sick. I drink a lot of water, and because I been doing this for some time, I got used to it. I feel GREAT. I want to lose the rest of my weight by the end of the year. If it doesn't work that way, oh well, but 1 year is quite shocking how much a person can change their body. I wanted this, and I am proving a person can do it. Don't give up and when your tired, ask yourself, "Am I quitting?" Lose all the weight now, it will be worth it!