Gym Routines

I would start out with strong lift 5x5 that is a basic routine that gets progressively heavier each week. (I know there are other programs out there, I'm suggesting it because I've seen results with it). Followed by some HIIT like sprints for 15-20 min.

Free weights are far more effective than machines. I would stick with free weights only and avoid machines.

The best way to loose weight is something that allows progression with increasing weight. You will not get big muscles with heavy weights. To build muscle size requires a calorie surplus. So as long as you are at a calorie deficit, you will not gain weight or muscle size.

Abs will come down the road as your body fat gets lower.

I had the worry that when I started training with a personal trainer I would get really big muscles and I haven't t. I am gradually growing into a body that is leaner than it has ever been and toned. Despite the fact that my trainer makes me use heavier weights than I would have ever lifted in my life, my body has not got bulky at all. I think it's to do with the lean muscle I'm developing or something. I'm sure someone will come along soon and explain what is is and the science stuff!!

Check out Bodybuilding.com

They are always my go-to when looking for a routine. They have many plans (even some for women) that you can concentrate on a certain muscle group and it will tell you what to use and how long to perform each exercise.

PS lifting heavy will not make you into a woman bodybuilder. Don't shy away from heavy weights as that in conjunction with some good cardio will get you that "toned" look you say you want. But remember, you can't "tone" a muscle