Hi! Sorta new here!

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Hello! So I joined MFP a few years ago and sort of got discouraged so I stopped using it. However I find myself googling and reading posts from others all the time so I figured I'd post and see if anyone has any great advice. I go through ups and downs emotionally just cause I really don't know what is going on with me. I'll try to keep this short. My whole life I've been pretty regular but when I got into high school and college I was especially in good shape. I was a competitive cheerleader and was 5'2" and about 118 lbs. went to college and stayed thin probably cause I continued to work out and consumed all my calories through alcoholic drinks lol. I've always been lucky. I are mcdonalds del taco you name it whatever I wanted my whole life and never gained. Let's fast forward to 24 years old (meanwhile at age 20 I grew to 5'6"). I had been on the depo shot birth control since I was 16, another thing that kept me skinny which No one could believe cause it's usually the opposite. After being on it for 8 years the doctors took me off it although I begged them not to. 1. Because I have too much estrogen and have endometriosis which landed me in the ER every month in pain which is why I got on the BC to begin with to get rid of my cycle. Well, within 6 months of getting of the shot, my estrogen levels went insane and although exercising SEVEN days a week, I shot up to 160. Additionally I found out I got hashimotos. I begged them to put me back on the depo thinking it would reverse this but nope, one year later I am now 157. I exercise 5-6 days a week two hours or more a day (cardio lots of weight lifting, all paleo diet except good carbs sometimes before a hardcore workout) and three lbs lost. I can't even begin to tell you how depressing it is to work so hard and feel so tired and fatigued and have no results. And I'm not just going by lbs, inches lost and pant sizes have not changed either. I think it's really upsetting me mainly because I went through life being a size 2 and at 26 I feel gross and just weird in my own body. My chest size went from an A to a C which bothers me the most-- I've always been very happy to be flat chested and can't even wear cute shirts anymore. I'm being tested monthly for thyroid because my doctors have no idea what's wrong and I'm about to go get liposuction and a breast reduction if things don't change soon. Sorry for being a downer but I thought there might be others out there that can help and support and understand what it's like. :( this sounds so vein but it's more that I feel sick when I see myself and just being in my own skin. :/ could use some encouragement, a "don't give up!" Attitude and hope that others out there understand having a mystery medical condition that won't let you lose any weight !

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  • KLangleydoula
    KLangleydoula Posts: 1,494 Member
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    Hi! Definitely don't give up! You can do this! Feel free to add me!
  • sammixbear
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    Wow thank you! You're the only person who responded or cared so I appreciate this. Adding for sure! Thanks for your positivity!! I hope no one thinks this Is a body image disorder-- yes I see myself negatively but I don't participate in Unhealthy behavior I just don't know what it's like to feel anything other than how I used to feel. Thank you again what a kind person!!!!
  • awesomejdad
    awesomejdad Posts: 493 Member
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    we all have reasons to look at ourselves and think we are imperfect. Everyone tends to look at themselves and there eyes go right to what they believe are there flaws. However more often then we realize, strangers would look at us and see only the positive things. Your a beautiful young women and you should not feel otherwise. If you need to lose weight then join the rest of the millions of people on here and just keep at it. Find the medical answers you need and keep working toward your goal. You don't have to look like you did when you were 17, your not 17 anymore. A person can be very beautiful without looking like the media tells the world we should look.

    I have lost a lot of weight and cut my body fat percentage dramatically. However I have been on here doing this for nearly three years. It took me forever, I just kept slowly chipping away, sometimes gaining back even. It's a long process sometimes but what does that matter if, like I have, we end up at our desired destination in the end.
  • sammixbear
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    Hi deadliftcardio,

    Thank you for the kind words. I know I mean I have been wanting and living my own personal life as if I'm 17. Not just weight, but my actions. It's like in trapped. I think I was just so happy at this time, I had long term relationships and now I've been single for so long that I just feel like I failed yet I did nothing wrong. Of course I'm going to follow up on my doctors results I just feel like I've done so much just to see no results. Ya know? I think when for your whole life you look great then you have this life altering experience and you exercise six days eat so healthy and nothing... You just lose all hope. I appreciate these kind words and advice and will continue to fight on because exercising and eating healthy, well, if I'm not losing weight, I'm at least improving my health right?! :) I just needed someone to say "I understand" because if I hear "work out eat healthy you'll lose" one more time I'll snap. Cause that's obviously not it you know ? :/ thank you again- anyone that even reads my story and responds is awesome and makes me think maybe its just a long long rough patch and eventually maybe it'll get better. I Really don't want to go down the plastic surgery route as it scares me, I've just became *desperate*

    Love <3
  • sammixbear
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    Just so everyone knows, I have good friends but they are all either very happy being overweight or they are skinny and don't get "my issue." I have hashimotos and they don't understand that it's close to physically impossible to lose weight. My own dad even thinks I'm making excuses but if you have this you'd understand :( forum for hashimotos?! I'm going on a hunt!
  • ChrisUK70
    ChrisUK70 Posts: 54 Member
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    HI,

    Stick with it, log every thing that you eat drink even on bad days when you go over your calories.
    It is surprising when you log things to how many calories you actually consume. Be consistent and I am sure you will start to lose weight.

    Best of Luck!
  • awesomejdad
    awesomejdad Posts: 493 Member
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    emsainz22.....you did read where she said she has a diagnosed medical condition that affects her weight loss right? Where your statement is accurate for most everyone the fact that she has a medical concern puts her into a field that is not common and she is better off taking the advice of her doctor then any advice us regular MFP users can give.
    I have learned first hand from my wife that the standard answers that are actually correct for me and just about everyone else on MFP can be completely thrown out the window for some people with real, actually diagnosed, medical conditions.
  • sammixbear
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    Thanks you guys!
    Chris UK: will definitely keep this up. I only eat veggies and chicken now so I don't think I'm consuming many calories. Don't drink soda, sugar and sweets actually make me physically Ill, but I'll look at my intake.

    Emsainz: I appreciate your feedback as well. Sorry about the big block of text - never used this before ! As far as workouts and intensity, I do two hours because I was a competitive cheerleader so my workouts are very intense so I need at least two hours to match what I'm used to (5 hours a day back In cheer practice!) so yes and it's cardio and strength training so I know that's not it.

    I think my issue is not exercising or dieting is the point. I'm a former athlete never had to watch a thing even when i quit In college. Just wondering why randomly in my mid 20s I'd blow up. Hence: medical issues and problems :/ it doesn't make sense to me I've been thin my whole life. However I still appreciate all your advice. Thank you again :)
  • sammixbear
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    Deadliftcardio,

    Thank you for saying something. :) it's okay though I'm used to most people not fully understanding the weight loss issue that's hashimotos causes. True I can't use principles that others do. I try and I try hard but it doesn't work. However I still work out every day with zip results because. Well. I refuse to Give up!
  • Mariem59
    Mariem59 Posts: 378 Member
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    Sammi, don't give up! Keep the faith, and you'll get your answers. Looks like you have several people in your corner now, hope it helps.
  • caitie518
    caitie518 Posts: 1 Member
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    Keep up with your doctors, maybe get a second opinion. I only trust my doctors through Mayo clinic Rochester. Someone will figure it out.
    Just don't give up on yourself. The beauty that is within us will always be there no matter what. :)
  • awesomejdad
    awesomejdad Posts: 493 Member
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    well that is the right thing to do. I don't know about your specific medical condition but I am sure the doctors will help you to get it in check eventually. Don't ever give up. Don't expect to be your former self, that should not be your goal. Every person grows up and wishes they could be there 17 year old sexy, athletic self. Everyone's body changes as the get older. Look at Michael Jordon as an example. He has gotten fat and he was one of the most elite athletes on the planet. Bodies change.
  • kathleenkilhefner
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    Just looking at your profile pic and you wonderful. Dont be so hard on yourself. As women we go through all types of body changes in their 20, 30, 40. For instance, never had trouble with weight until 46. Now I look like i am about to give birth. lol. My baby days are well over. Really dont know alot about your medical condition. So I cannot comment on that topic. Wish you the best of luck beautiful. Keep sharing. Looking forward to hearing about your accomplishments and struggles. U r not alone.
  • sammixbear
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    Thank you everyone. Really I need that. Kathleen you almost made me cry! Lol. Honestly it's hard I'm around a group if women (my mom) who are around 110lbs and I feel weird. My dad said I'm curvy which just added fuel to the fire. I just want to be normal again. You guys are so great I don't feel so alone now. I'll share my dr notes and updates when I get them (just got my tests done again last week. I swear they take enough blood to fuel a vampire colony lol!!) thanks again for all the support it's what I needed. You guys are a blessing. :)
  • Kelven23
    Kelven23 Posts: 51
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    I don't really have much to add other then I am sorry you are struggling and I hope you find peace with it all.
  • awesomejdad
    awesomejdad Posts: 493 Member
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    Thank you everyone. Really I need that. Kathleen you almost made me cry! Lol. Honestly it's hard I'm around a group if women (my mom) who are around 110lbs and I feel weird. My dad said I'm curvy which just added fuel to the fire. I just want to be normal again. You guys are so great I don't feel so alone now. I'll share my dr notes and updates when I get them (just got my tests done again last week. I swear they take enough blood to fuel a vampire colony lol!!) thanks again for all the support it's what I needed. You guys are a blessing. :)


    I work graveyard so I am basically a vampire.
  • kuntry_navySD
    kuntry_navySD Posts: 106 Member
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    have you thought of switching up your routine in the gym? maybe just maybe you have plateaued in your 2hr + sessions. You're welcome to add me for motivation if you'd like