In need of support :(

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taliasometimes
taliasometimes Posts: 301 Member
in Motivation and Support
hi there people, i need help. just need to get stuff of my chest and be open and honest about my weight gain.


A year ago I succesfully reduced my body weight down from 199lbs to 112lbs . I was happy , motivated and active. I was eating right and keeping the weight off easy. I was practically obsessed with what i ate and going to the gym.
Unfortunatley, I underwent a gallbladder removal op, which was the start of a downward spiral. My excersice ceased up and i when my one year old marriage crumbled and I met a new boyfriend, a good day was lazy and filled with pizza .The relationship was volitile and I was left shredded of all my self esteem, self worth and i was miserable. I had a nervous breakdown and became suicidal and had a month long spell in a physc ward during which i wasnt allowed outside for more than 30 mins supervised at a time and was pumped with drugs and fed 4 meals a day , 2 included deserts!

I came out of all this mess about 40lbs heavier.
it's my fault, i handled all these situations badly, so I am only blaming myself of course, however i have been in denial about my weight gain and feel i need to rectify the situation starting today.

I am no longer the skinny success story I posted up here over a year ago and hopefully inspired others with ( i got so many wonderful messages , i feel like a let down now! :(

but i really need motivation and support that I can do it again. I know it's possible, and this time only a third of what I originally had to lose.....

but its suffocating me, and i think it's faliure im feeling.i don't look FAT, but I am so let down by myself I'm actually in tears when I look in the mirror sometimes.

sorry for the ramble, just needed to reach out.

Replies

  • SammieGetsFit
    SammieGetsFit Posts: 432 Member
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    Firstly, making it through such a trying time is a success in and of itself!! You are amazing.

    Secondly, don't focus on the past ("achievements" or "failures"). You know that you've taken control, been happy and healthy, before. Use that knowledge to keep you focused on doing what you need to do here and now. You've got this. You just have to let yourself move forward.

    :flowerforyou:
  • cdahl383
    cdahl383 Posts: 726 Member
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    hi there people, i need help. just need to get stuff of my chest and be open and honest about my weight gain.


    A year ago I succesfully reduced my body weight down from 199lbs to 112lbs . I was happy , motivated and active. I was eating right and keeping the weight off easy. I was practically obsessed with what i ate and going to the gym.
    Unfortunatley, I underwent a gallbladder removal op, which was the start of a downward spiral. My excersice ceased up and i when my one year old marriage crumbled and I met a new boyfriend, a good day was lazy and filled with pizza .The relationship was volitile and I was left shredded of all my self esteem, self worth and i was miserable. I had a nervous breakdown and became suicidal and had a month long spell in a physc ward during which i wasnt allowed outside for more than 30 mins supervised at a time and was pumped with drugs and fed 4 meals a day , 2 included deserts!

    I came out of all this mess about 40lbs heavier.
    it's my fault, i handled all these situations badly, so I am only blaming myself of course, however i have been in denial about my weight gain and feel i need to rectify the situation starting today.

    I am no longer the skinny success story I posted up here over a year ago and hopefully inspired others with ( i got so many wonderful messages , i feel like a let down now! :(

    but i really need motivation and support that I can do it again. I know it's possible, and this time only a third of what I originally had to lose.....

    but its suffocating me, and i think it's faliure im feeling.i don't look FAT, but I am so let down by myself I'm actually in tears when I look in the mirror sometimes.

    sorry for the ramble, just needed to reach out.

    Sorry to hear of all your troubles. But you can lose the weight again. My wife has gained around 40 lbs with each of our daughters and both times she lost it in just under a year. Just start eating healthier, take some walks at night, go jogging around your neighborhood, join a gym, lift weights, start becoming more active, etc. Exercising itself will make you feel better and give you a more positive outlook. Instead of crying in front of the mirror, envision your new self 6 months from now or a year from now and then do whatever it takes to get there.
  • taliasometimes
    taliasometimes Posts: 301 Member
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    Firstly, making it through such a trying time is a success in and of itself!! You are amazing.

    Secondly, don't focus on the past ("achievements" or "failures"). You know that you've taken control, been happy and healthy, before. Use that knowledge to keep you focused on doing what you need to do here and now. You've got this. You just have to let yourself move forward.

    :flowerforyou:

    Thank you so much xxx
  • Cyan99
    Cyan99 Posts: 84 Member
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    You shouldn't be blaming yourself of feeling bad, you made it through something painful and trialing, and that's an achievement of itself - you should be proud, and ready to take your life back.

    That said, there's nothing wrong with feeling sad or vulnerable - that where you need support and I would be happy to help support you :) Kia kaha!

    xx
  • steveyinasia
    steveyinasia Posts: 121 Member
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    Wow, you made it through all that and ready to start again....you are already winning because you faced challenges that most of us do not. I am only 5 days into my second attempt, I am determined to make it this time. Like you I was a gym nut 7 years ago and somewhere along the way I lost the motivation. I have some of it back now and ready, as you are, to make this a success. I have found writing in here to be very helpful as I have reading the stories.

    Keep at it, they seems to be a really nice bunch of people in here
  • taliasometimes
    taliasometimes Posts: 301 Member
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    thank you, i just hope that once you have lost SO much weight, you can do it again with the same results.
    I really feel motivated today! so :D yay!
  • 2013sk
    2013sk Posts: 1,318 Member
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    Hey... Weve all lost weight & put it back on..... Don't worry about it!!!

    You've been skinnier, me too... Snap!!!!

    Just get back on that wagon & do what you need to do girl to make yourself happy!!!

    You can easily do it - You've done it before!!!

    Start logging, start exercising, start achieving your goals.... : )

    Don't look back... Only forward.... That was the past, this is the presence : )
  • Allisonfitness99
    Allisonfitness99 Posts: 128 Member
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    You should never blame your self for everything that happens.. We all have ups and downs and how we get back up and deal with our problems show just how strong willed you truly are .. The motivation on here help me a lot.. I really hope that helps you too!!

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