Low self esteem, Depression and Anxiety

Hello all I was coming here to see if I could get some advice from you all. I'm suffering from depression and anxiety and I have very low self esteem. My depression happened from being used by a guy I liked, silly I know but it's true and my self esteem was always low. I really need some tips on how I can overcome this. I am starting my weight loss diet and exercise plan but I know it'll take a little more. Any tips? Thanks

Replies

  • mactaffy84
    mactaffy84 Posts: 398 Member
    This might sound glib or trite, and I don't mean it to be, but I'd consider getting into therapy. I doubt most people here are clinical psychologists and qualified to help you. Besides, we don't know enough about you to even try! If you really are struggling with depression, you should see a professional. Good luck!
  • MichaelVRenner
    MichaelVRenner Posts: 92 Member
    You can friend me. I battle from hypochondria, mild agoraphobia, which has lead to depression and anxiety disorder. Yes, you should definitely seek professional guidance, but there is no shame in seeking out others for sympathy, empathy, or a healthy social distraction. Never feel because of your struggles you need to quarantine yourself from others and life's pleasures.
  • newdaydawning79
    newdaydawning79 Posts: 1,503 Member
    It's not something you "get over." My depression started as a teenager when I was constantly taunted about my weight. I didn't get treated for it until I was away in college because I didn't want to tell anyone about it. My self-esteem is still bad for similar reasons, and my anxiety comes and goes. Speak to a doctor, get a referral to a mental health clinic. Sometimes therapy can do the trick, sometimes meds, sometimes a combination of both. You have to figure out what's going to work for you and sometimes it's trial and error.

    Good luck to you! :flowerforyou:
  • SydNyd
    SydNyd Posts: 11 Member
    I'm not a therapist, but it really helps me to clear my thoughts and make sense of my mind when I journal… it's a terrific outlet.
  • mallorytravels
    mallorytravels Posts: 86 Member
    If you are able to get therapy, I highly recommend it to you. It is a luxury many of us can't afford.

    You can reap great rewards from making small changes. Eventually choosing the healthy thing to do becomes the habit. But not until you tackle deep-seated emotional issues. Look for the real reasons you're depressed/have low self esteem, and try to understand how those circumstances affect every choice you make.
  • chaemd
    chaemd Posts: 38 Member
    We've all had heartbreak of some kind, so I'm afraid anything that I say may sound like a cliche, but I'll try to help. Spend some time thinking about the things that you like about yourself. There is a time to cry and feel the pain, but don't dwell on it. Don't keep picking yourself apart - what you should have done, what you should have known, what you should have said, when you should have left, etc. You've probably gone over that stuff again and again. When you find yourself going there, make a shift in your thinking. What is good about you? Also, get up everyday putting one foot in front of the other towards your goals. What do you want to accomplish? Write a list, then every day do something toward one or two of the goals. You want to lose 16lbs, so what can you do today that will help get you there? After awhile, if you stick to it, you can add these accomplishment to the list of things that you like about yourself. Every day is a new day to be grateful for who you are. You'll be fine. I know it.
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,219 Member
    The biggest thing that helped me overcome many many years of low self esteem, depression and anxiety was to start strength training. The stronger I got physically the stronger I got mentally.

    It would be a good idea to see a professional.

    Other than that don't focus on what happened, focus on building the best version of you!
  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member
    Three words… Cognitive behavioral therapy.
  • amunet07
    amunet07 Posts: 1,245 Member
    You can friend me. I battle from hypochondria, mild agoraphobia, which has lead to depression and anxiety disorder. Yes, you should definitely seek professional guidance, but there is no shame in seeking out others for sympathy, empathy, or a healthy social distraction. Never feel because of your struggles you need to quarantine yourself from others and life's pleasures.
    [/quote

    ^^what he said

    wow...a male me except for the hypochondria. (turns out I was sick). Hi male me.
  • stephgas
    stephgas Posts: 159 Member
    Three words… Cognitive behavioral therapy.

    agreed. cognitive behavioral therapy, when practiced successfully, really shows us how we can change the way we think and the choices we make. working with a professional is truly the best way to make long term positive changes re: anxiety and depression.

    someone else mentioned journaling - this is a great idea too. sometimes just writing our feelings down and giving them that power is important. no matter what you're feeling, your feelings are valid. your feelings are valid. don't just push your feelings down or push them away and ignore them - FEEL THEM. another thing that helps many people is using gratitude statements and positive self-affirmations. each night before you go to sleep, write down three (or two, or even one) thing you're grateful for that day. when you wake up, write down three (or two, or one) things you're grateful for about the upcoming day. you can do this in a journal, on an app like notes or reminders, or get a small dry erase board and keep it next to your bed. search online for positive self-affirmations and work on saying those while looking at yourself in the mirror. these small things can really make a positive difference in our lives if we're open to the idea.
  • xShreddx
    xShreddx Posts: 127 Member
    See? I love how helpful we can all be here on MFP! Every single post on this thread is spot on. I too suffer from anxiety quite a bit due to my OCD. My wife suffered from depression and sought help. She has been taking medication for a few years and is a brand new person! Her depression went away quickly and she has never struggled with it since.

    Regarding low self esteem, i hear you. Every day I'd say horrible things to myself constantly but once I started working out and eating better, that disappeared. Why? Cuz I know I'm working on it and will get there.

    Feel free to add me.........all of you on this thread! I think we can help each other by sharing stories and experiences.
  • catbyrd
    catbyrd Posts: 87 Member
    This is what helped me. I suffered from all three of the same things and didn't get help for over 20 years. Once I got up enough nerve to see a therapist, the cognitive behavioral therapy was a god send. If you cant afford a therapist google it and get some information. Basically, you are listing out a few positive things to boost yourself up and you post them in conspicuous places around your house so that you read the lists multiple times a day. The idea is to have your brain start believing it. This helps immensely with the low self esteem. For the others might try some medication. It helps you deal and understand why. Good luck. And getting in shape definitely helps boost your self esteem.
  • Greenkawa
    Greenkawa Posts: 1 Member
    HI, I have this stuff too. I cannot recommend CBT in the hands of a professional highly enough, and lots of exercise! It really helps in lots of ways.
  • pattycakes80
    pattycakes80 Posts: 118 Member
    you are worth the hard work that therapy demands. you are worthy of a healthy self-esteem. if you are able, i urge you to consider therapy. this is your life - you set the path, you set the tone and you are incredibly capable of setting the change.

    therapy saved my life and i used to laugh at the idea of therapy. it straight up saved my life.

    you got this.