starting out, need advice

I was in a bad car accident 2 and 1/2 years ago. I gained weight because I slept all the time (so concussion could heal) but kept eating. I did not pay attention to what I was eating. I could not walk more than 1/4 mile without feeling tired. SLOWLY I was able to increase how far I walked. It took me a whole year to be able to run again. It took 6 months for the fog to clear and realize I had gained weight and I needed to watch what I ate. The important thing is that I am alive and can feed myself, tie my shoes, walk, and run. Now I run 5-8 miles 3-4 times per week. I have lost 42 pounds with 10 more to go.

My advice: Be patient! Take it slow. Do not rush yourself better. Believe you me, you do not want to relapse. Just be mindful of what you are eating. Do not fall into the trap of just eating the whole bag of chips because you are bored or feel sorry for yourself or whatever the excuse is.

Try to walk the dog a little bit further every week. Walking counts--even if you feel like you are going slow. Listen to your body and you will be able to heal. You have my permission to only do what you can now--don't compare it to what you used to be able to do. You will make yourself crazy.

Sending you positive thoughts...

so what kind of diet should i be loking at setting up for myself? any types of food i should stay away from? obviously sugars, and fast food.

Oh boy, you are going to get literally every food under the sun to avoid by asking this question, and I mean that with the utmost respect for everybody here. Hehe.

Your body will be better nourished if you eat lean proteins, vegetables, fruits, whole grains, nuts, seeds, legumes, tubers and dairy. If there are foods that trigger intense cravings or things that you can't stop eating, then I would avoid those things or find a substitute (sweets seem to be a big one for many people, but you can fulfill a sweet craving with a piece of fruit that will be lower calorie and higher in nutrients than a cookie) -- BUT I also am one that doesn't demonize any food so long as you can keep it within your calorie goals and otherwise hit your nutrients (both macro and micro).

This means that if you really want a Big Mac, I believe that you can have a Big Mac so long as the calories work for you, but the rest of the day needs to be much more nutrient rich. Keep in mind, though, that fast food is way high in sodium and could make you retain water. It can also make you feel hungrier more than leaner foods would, and may make you feel heavy while you're trying to work out.

ETA: Obviously, I'm not trying to condone a fast food diet. But in my opinion, so long as you're not hitting the drive thru all the time I don't think anyone has to avoid it all the time. It's a sometimes food, an occasional food, and if you choose a more balanced meal plan then you may not even ever want it it all.

Yoga does wonders for my back pain. You should try it. Also look at If it fits your macros. It's a great, long term diet that doesn't leave you feeling deprived. Just make sure you know that when you calculate your macros, if you can't do strength training to put 0 days of exercise. Cardio doesn't count as exercise for the IIFYM calculators.

i have had a pretty sedimentary lifestyle...

A sedimentary lifestyle?! That rocks!

hahahahahaa I'm glad I'm not the only one that caught that!

most activites hurt my back and give me bad headaches, besides going out and walking my dog

So walk. Just walk. As you feel able, walk a little further, or a little faster, or choose a route with some hills.
I have one MFP friend who regularly walks for 3 hours a day!
Ask your doctor (real doctor, not chiropractor) or physical therapist about some strengthening exercises, how to ease into exercising, weightlifting, strengthening.

Maybe get a few sessions with a certified personal trainer, someone with experience/training working with people with physical limitations, and have them write down a program you can follow. Get tuneups every month as you progress.

Here's where you can search for people in your area who are certified by the American College of Sports Medicine:
http://members.acsm.org/source/custom/Online_locator/OnlineLocator.cfm

with all my bills and stuff, i have not been eating the best

It's cheaper to eat good unprocessed whole natural foods than unhealthy stuff.
Also, if you eat lower on the food chain it's cheaper. Use meat as a seasoning or side dish instead of the main course.

5'5 and currently around 135-140 lbs so i wouldnt really consider myself "overweight".

Nope, you're in a healthy weight range based on BMI.

what kind of meal replacement shakes/smoothies would you suggest? im not a big breakfast person, but figured id start eating 3 meals a day, and try to get my calorie right. about how many calories should i be looking at for a day?

There's no need for any fancy, expensive meal replacement anything.
That being said, _part_ of my breakfast every morning is carnation instant breakfast in skim milk... along with a banana and a piece of whole wheat bread & peanut butter.
Because I wasn't much of a breakfast person either, and I wanted something smallish that I liked.

If you like smoothies, I'd start with frozen fruit, nonfat (or lowfat) milk, and nonfat (or lowfat) greek yogurt.
Maybe add some honey or stevia if you want it sweeter.
Peanut butter would taste good with bananas.
Some quick oatmeal adds texture, but it's a bear to get through a straw unless you put it in the blender first & grind it smaller.
Same for nuts.

Here's a post I did about goal setting. It's geared toward losing weight, which you really don't need to do, but includes links to several BMI calculators.
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/MKEgal/view/2014-06-08-setting-goals-667045

Since you're already at a healthy weight, multiply that by 15 to get calories.
That's TOTAL, not net. Ignore net.
http://www.health.harvard.edu/healthbeat/HB_web/calorie-counting-made-easy.htm
135 x 15 = 2025

when you calculate your macros, if you can't do strength training to put 0 days of exercise. Cardio doesn't count as exercise for the IIFYM calculators

Which is silly, because cardio burns many times more calories than weightlifting.