NEED some motivation and support....

SevenisHeaven · January 2011

Thought this was the best place to get it! LOL

So, yeah- This is only exactly 1 month after I started. I've worked out everyday (with rest days MAYBE once a week). I've lost a total of 6 pounds in 1 month...not good, but not bad either.

I am a stay at home mom to 5 kids (2 are in school FT and 1 PT), I breastfeed, I am the only one who cooks, cleans, laundry, etc. My workouts are "about" an hour hour and 15 long, but EASILY turn into 3-4 hours because I have to stop to get the kids this, stop to clean that, cook this, this kid is doing that, hes looking at me kinda stuff.

Today is my breaking point. My house is DESTROYED I have 2 days worth of dishes and a week (at least!) for a family of 7. I cannot workout once my oldest 2 get home from school, because it is homework, they play the Wii (I do Wii workouts), then time for me to make supper and fold yet another load of laundry. I have to get this house clean, and there will be no time for a workout AGAIN today.

I am so ready just to give up and stay the fat self I have become.

*Sorry for my whine fest...I just needed to get it out.

superwmn · January 2011

Cleaning the house burns a ton of calories. There's your work out

YOU CAN DO IT!!!

Charmagne

Toninette · January 2011

I'm thinking what you do daily is a workout in itself! Don't stop, don't give up........it will begin to fall into place! You have come to the right place for support and motivation! Just keep moving GF!

mjrcjb26 · January 2011

Hey Melissa! I feel you with not having time. I only have one child, one dog and my husband works full time while I am a stay at home mom. YOu really have your hands full! My 8 month old keeps me very busy so I have been working out while he does his morning nap. Then on his second nap I do my homework while my second workout of the day is when he goes to bed at 8pm! One thing I have noticed really helps me is using Netflix to get workouts in the mail. This way I am able to pick fun workouts which keep me motiviated.

tamlyn27 · January 2011

Dont give up! You can do it...I know I find it much easier to not work out and be lazy...but think of your kids and how they need you around, strong , fit and wonderful!

rmkorama · January 2011

Great googly moogly you've got a lot on your plate. But I agree that you're keeping active by doing other things that aren't always classifed as "exercise." Don't discount your hard work! Give yourself a break. Remember -- this doesn't have to be (and I think it shouldn't be) an either/or proposition. Sometimes you just have to give other things priority, but you don't have to give up altogether. Just tracking your calories takes time and is great for weight-loss. You can do it! You might have to do it a little at a time, but keep in mind why you want to make these changes and try to focus on those. Focus on the victories, not the failures.

rlelliott08 · January 2011

I know how you feel, although I only a 1 child that is 3, but he makes a big enuff mess for 2 or 3 kids. Try to turn your house work into a workout is what I do, bending over, dancing while I clean, ect. I have only been at this for 5 days, have worked out for 4 in a row, but wth so much housework todo today don't know if ill get my work out in. I have cut my sodas down to 1 day and the rest of the day I drink water. I have never really been a big vegtable person, or fruit person, So instead of trying to eat more vegs and fruit, I just kinda cut my meals in 1/2 and eat 1/2 of what i did, it seems to be doing the trick.

You can add me if youd like.

heidiscool · January 2011

It all adds up. You have a very heavy load to carry - good for you for getting healthy at the same time. Don't put a timeframe on your weight loss, rather set goals for completion during the week - six half hour workouts. Seven days recording everything you eat. The weight loss will fall in line. Don't stress about getting the house perfect, but just aim for a controlled chaos. Take care of you. We don't get fat because we neglected the house or our kids. We get fat because we neglect ourselves.

Enigmatica · January 2011

Are you counting the housecleaning calories in your exercise diary? I do. And breastfeeding takes a lot of calories too. Losing 6 pounds in a month is fabulous!!! It's harder to do when you have little kids, no doubt about it, because it's just harder to get YOU time. But it's worth it. I really struggled with learning HOW to get "me" time with the kids around, and frankly didn't get good at it until they were all older. I wish I'd done better at that because it makes a world of difference to your physical and emotional health. Do better than me!

Tangy1966 · January 2011

I agree...the work you do around the house counts for something. Take a deep breath and tackle the dishes. This will at
least clear your head...try to enjoy every chore you do. Be grateful you have the ability to do the things you can. BREATHE!!!
If at all possible, incorporate yoga into your routine. Find a class you like and go at least once a week. It will help with your
stress and weight loss goals...and yes, YOU CAN DO IT! :flowerforyou:

darlachristine · January 2011

Good news, the cleaning can count as your exercise

You can log the minutes spent under your exercise. I've even seen seen people log cooking as exercise, hey it burns calories, go for it! BTW 6 lbs in a month is excellent, slow and steady is best for the long term, you're doing great! If you can manage it, try to join some sort of exercise class that you enjoy so you will have your "ME" time

SandraKay79 · January 2011

Not sure how much chores your kids are assigned but it's time to rope them into it.

I have 10&8 yo boys and a 15 mo boy. 2 years ago it was decided that my oldest was mire than capable of doing dishes or at least helping me with them. I also decided that all of the kids clothes were going on hangers because although a 6yo can't food they can certainly handle hanging their own clothes. Underwear, pjs and socks are the only thing remaining in the dresser.

At this point you have to have the older boys start chipping in where they can. Doing everything for them will do nothing but exhaust you. I believe it is more beneficial for them to help, explain that the family is a team and everyone has there own part.

OLP76 · January 2011

So where's your Husband or partner? Why can't he help with the dishes and with the kids. Tell him that you need this hour to workout for yourself. He should be supportive of you. As long as your eatin' right - you should be fine...best wishes!

LauraLLee · January 2011

Hi, the first thing that comes to my mind is that you are stressed out! Being stressed can cause your body to hold on to the weight. If you can find some time to yourself and just breathe I think I would do a world of good for you.
And you can make this change. Do it for the right reasons, love yourself, dont give up and it will happen.

Dafrog · January 2011

Wow. Your day is a workout alone. dont give up. add me if you like

JeanK56 · January 2011

6 pounds in a month is great! Don't get down on yourself. Housecleaning does burn a lot of calories. How many levels to your home, more than one? RUN up and down the stairs with the laundry. Dance as you vacuum/sweep/mop. And it is okay that your workout, other than housecleaning, is broken up during the day. How old are your kids? Never too young to help with the household chores. My kids were taught that I am not the only one eating, wearing clotes, etc so everyone had to pitch in and help with dishes and laundry. It's okay to take a day off from working out as well as your muscles need to rest. Good luck, you are doing great!

sweetpeaga7 · January 2011

Hang with it girl! You! Can! Do! IT!!!! It's mind over matter some days. Our minds tell us we are too busy, that we aren't too unmotivated, that we are not gonna make our goal any way so why try BUT they are ALL LIES!!!! Tell yourself that you CAN do it and get through it and you WILl! Positive self talk is a powerful thing. And yes you should cut yourself some slack..I mean let's face it you basically have three full-time jobs...mother, house keeper/cook (okay those are really two so you now have four full time jobs) and wife. BUT you have to have "ME" time otherwise you won't be good at your jobs you have. Don't give up though. You are definitely on the right track and doing way better than most people out there that would look at all that you have on your plate and not even try or think about trying. YOU ARE AWESOME!!!!

dlaplume2 · January 2011

I too am a mom to 5 kids. I hear ya with the laundry, dishes, dishes, feeding kids, laundry, break up a fight laundry another load of dishes, homework, laundry and some more dishes. Not mention another load of laundry. It does get easier once the kids get older. You'll still have another load of laundry to do.

Sorry that is the one thing that gets worse because their clothes get bigger, take up more space, thus making more loads.

Then the non stop watching them eat and you are so hungry you want to rip that cereal bar out of their hands and eat half of each of thiers. Yah I hear ya..
Don't give up it gets better. The first thing you have to realize is your house is lived in and used. It will not be spotless, ever. It just won't. The laundry will always be there. ALWAYS. You need to take care of yourself so you will be there too. If your workout last 10 minutes at a time so be it. At least they are in there. Look for ways to exercise while doing things. I put my laundry basket on the floor when I am folding and do squats everytime I take somehing from a basket to fold. (i am lazy on the whites, can't handle that many squats.)
Maybe if you use a crock pot you can play on the wii with the kids after school and homework is done but before dinner. I promise the laundry will wait. it always does.
Best wishes. you can friend me if you like. I'll probabaly be doing laundry

mariannekehl · January 2011

6 pounds in 1 month is a HUGE accomplishment! You are being too hard on yourself - you need to be nicer to yourself. You have a lot to be proud of - and a clean house is overrated.

MissKim · January 2011

Hey girl

I'm just gonna be really honest with you! (because that's how i roll!) right now, my house is destroyed. Darron has helped by doing laundry, but he refuses to fold it and put it up. So guess where about 12 loads of laundry are right now?? in dj's crib. so everyday this week i have dug around in his crib to find something for me and dj to wear! the rest of the house is just as bad. i feel so unorganized and messy right now, and it really gives me the anxiety!! So I can only imagine what you deal with with 5 kids!!! Darron helps some, but it's only on his time, when he feels like it. but the things i have to do everyday, i HAVE to do everyday!! and I don't seem to have time to do the other things that need done. I think everyone goes through these phases, you have alot to do!! your life alone is a workout so I think it's awesome you actually fit in workouts! i don't know how you do it! i just have an 8 wk old and i've yet to workout even though i say i'm going to everyday! i get home from work and all i seem to have the energy for is getting him taken care of and feeding us. Don't you even think about quitting b/c now you have this awesome website and awesome friends to help you through it!! make some to do lists, gets some motivation, that always helps me. i'm working on one right now for this weekend. also get your husband in gear, give him a to do list! trust me you have ways to get him to help. trust me, you hold the key to everything if you know what i mean

I say all this just to really say don't give up! we got this!

mlb929 · January 2011

Focus on your can do's not your can't do's. Tell the kids if they want the Wii - they can watch you first, or keep an eye on the younger kids while you get 10 minutes in.

Here is my guess, when you start to lose weight by just diet alone, you will see successes. These successes will motivate you, you will be more motivated to continue. It will start to mean getting up 10 minutes earlier to wash dishes or fold laundry to get a work out in. When my kids were young, I only could work out on weekends, when DH was around a few extra minutes to walk them.

When the weather gets better, head to the park - only walk there, kids love exercise. Be an example for them, they will want to motivate you and see you better.

When I breastfed, I would do butt squeezes, squats, lunges, leg lifts, anything to keep moving while I was just sitting down for a feeding. My oldest read to my youngest, to give me a few minutes to plan a meal better, or he would rattle a toy when the baby cried, he would run to get there first.

brblake · January 2011

***" We don't get fat because we neglected the house or our kids. We get fat because we neglect ourselves."*** -heidiscool
Remember this!! You have it posted at the bottom of your posting!! It can be really frustrating to not have a completly organized home but my dear lady..you have FIVE young children and making time for yourself IS important. I am one out of five kids and I remember the craziness sometimes(or all the time

) Hang in there and DON'T give up on yourself!! You can do this but for right now it will be harder and more challenging but will get easier as your kiddos get older. And they can help more around the house. It's good to vent and not hold it in and look you get all this support!! Don't completely neglect yourself. I have only one kiddos right now and she's almost 4 months and I am having a hard time sometimes..with five you are a strong woman!! Keep it up!!

SevenisHeaven · January 2011

First off, THANK you for the outpouring of support. I have to be honest...I bawled like a baby into the dish towel as I was reading the replies!

mlb929- I have a 9 year old with ADD that will make it so I CAN'T workout, so he can play the Wii. Its so much easier to give up the workout and let them play...thats how I got HERE.

Kim- I TOTALLY understand the anxiety stuff about the housework. AND that the hubs only helps on his time..and what you have to do HAS to get done NOW. Like if I don't do dishes DAILY we don't have dishes to eat on. (Have a family of 7, 6 that eat, and a place setting of 8.) If I don't do laundry atleast every week, kids dont have clothes to wear to school. You are totally right. I DO have this AMAZING website and AMAZING friends on this site who I can't leave hanging!

mariannekehl- That has always been a hard thing for me to do. I am overly-critical of myself and what I do/don't do.

dlaplume2- I don't EVER expect my house to be "spotless" but I DO need some room to workout..LOL And like I said if I dont do dishes at least DAILY then we have no dishes to eat off of.

sweetpeaga7- and that is where this post came from. My mind telling me, you cannot possibly do everything by yourself..why try. You aren't good enough to do this, why try.

SevenisHeaven · January 2011

Toninette - Thank You!!
mjrcjb26 - My kids never nap at the same time. One is ALWAYS awake. Never thought of Netflix!! Good Idea!
tamlyn27 - You are so right. I started this to be around for my kids and not die early because of my weight! I WILL FINISH!
rmkorama - Love the Great Googly Moogly..made me laugh!! I've always been an all or nothing kinda girl. If I start being a better housekeeper, then something else lacks-such as weight loss. When I concentrate of weightloss, my housework slacks...one of my biggest downfalls!
rlelliott08 - I've been forcing myself to do the fruit/veggie thing-I know what your talking about. I have been counting cals, totally cut pop out, only water..TRYING to workout everyday..
heidiscool - I totally had to steal your last bit. It really hit me. Thanks! I've always taken care of everyone else..that is why I am like this. Its a hard habit to break!
Enigmatica - No I hadn't been counting cleaning in my workouts. I have no ME time..seriously even peeing I have a child or 2 in there. Something I need to work on!
Tangy1966 - I did tackle the dishes. Got half done and had to come back to the computer! lol I can't get out of the house by myself for one night a week, the whole house would crumble..and I'm serious! lol I need to hear the YOU CAN DO ITS! Thanks!
darlachristine - as I said above..the whole house would be a pile of rubble if I tried to take a class etc.
SandraKay79 - My kids do no chores. I do everything for everybody. I'm going to HAVE to start giving them SOME chores. I cannot continue to do it all!
OLP76 - My husband works full time. I guess I feel that since I stay home and he works he shouldn't "have to" do the housework. Well, I guess thats just the way it is in our house..no one really said. But, I HAVE said Eff it and not done a darn thing around the house...all it accomplished was when I started doing stuff again, I had a WHOLE LOT MORE to do!
LauraLLee - Yes, I am stressed. But this is not un normal. I'm always stressed.
Dafrog - Thanks!
Jeanmknittel - Thanks, I just feel I should lost more, or that everyone else is losing at a faster pace...I'm competitive..I know it isn't about that..but ya know!

rmkorama · January 2011

You're welcome! :bigsmile: I love that exclamation.

OLP76 - My husband works full time. I guess I feel that since I stay home and he works he shouldn't "have to" do the housework. Well, I guess thats just the way it is in our house..no one really said. But, I HAVE said Eff it and not done a darn thing around the house...all it accomplished was when I started doing stuff again, I had a WHOLE LOT MORE to do!

Here's some food for thought. I can pretty well get where you're coming from, but here's the thing: your job doesn't end.

Think about it. Your husband works full time, but so do you. The only real difference is that he gets to leave his job, come home, and take a break. When do you get to leave your job and relax? Even if the only time he can help out is a few extra hours on the weekend to do special projects and catch up, it would likely be great for your stress and workload if he could. He may already, and if so, that's great. But if not, you might want to consider how your two jobs differ.

Just my two cents! :flowerforyou:

Chalktawmom · January 2011

Ahhh I SO understand. Don't you just get sick of being consumed by thinking about your weight, clothes, how you feel, how you look etc.? UGH! It's exhausting. I really just want to FORCE myself to be okay with how I look and get over it! Some days I just want to say #@% it ...I have more important things to worry about

BUT.... the feeling will come back. Over and over and over again and usually worse right? LET's just get this done!!!!! Get to our goal weights and be done OBSESSING over it! By then we'll have a lifestyle down right?

Hey, thanks for listening to me ramble

NEED some motivation and support....

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