Quick question about son's eating?

I have two quick questions regarding my 4year olds eating habits, if anyone can help.

1. So my son has quite a varied, healthy, diet compared to other children his age that I know. Every dinner has at least 4 different vegetables in it, as well as some protein and carbs and they are all homemade as much as possible.

However recently he has started to become quite picky with what carbs he eats in general at dinner - he will eat all of the meat on his plate, but will barely touch the pasta/rice/homemade chips etc.
Recently the only thing I can get him to eat is rice if we add spices to it, tortilla wraps and mashed potatoes - however constantly giving him these is both unrealistic and not overly healthy.

I've tried sending him to the stairs for not eating, making him sit, giving him smaller portions of the carbs etc but nothing seems to work and it's starting to both frustrate and worry me. I understand that as long as he's eating then he's getting nutrients, but just meat and veg doesn't seem good enough for a growing child.


2. When he first wakes my son isn't hungry and it can take him a good hour or so to want to eat and even at that he is happy with a small bowl of cereal or some yogurt etc. Before summer this wasn't a concern as he would wake about 9am, have something small at 10am or thereabouts and then he would have lunch around 11.45 for nursery at 12.15 (at nursery he would have a snack of fruit/veh and milk around 2ish).
However in a few days he starts at the morning sessions which will mean being awake between 7am and 7.15am for a shower and then in for nursery starting for 9 (his snack will move to around 10.30am). I cannot send him to nursery if he either hasn't eaten or has eaten a tiny amount as I fear he'll end up hungry/unwell feeling.

Does anyone have any advice or hints as to how to improve his eating habits?
«1

Replies

  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,407 Member
    So what? Let the boy eat how and when he wants. I dont understand how forcing kids to eat does anything healthy. He has his own natural hunger signals, and unless if he is just wanting candy and not eating at all - I would not worry about it.
  • castadiva
    castadiva Posts: 2,016 Member
    Have you asked him why he doesn't want to eat the pasta/rice/non-mashed potato? It may be something very simple, and easily fixed - he might say it hasn't got enough flavour, for example, since he eats rice with spices or mashed potato, which generally has more flavour because of the milk/butter/seasoning element. You might have to coax the answer out of him, and/or interpret what he says - he may not have the vocabulary to explain clearly, but if it's a flavour or texture thing, that's easily improved. Even as a small child, I consistently refused cauliflower because, to me, it has no flavour and a ghastly texture, though broccoli was never an issue.

    Re. breakfast, is there something he could eat on the way to nursery, when he's about ready to eat? Homemade granola bar or muffin, for example? Or a non-breakfast food? Fruit or veggie sticks in a little bag or something? Might take a little pre-planning/preparation, but it would solve the problem. Another possibility, if he likes eggs - hard boil a few at the start of the week, or I bake a half dozen eggs in muffin cases with a slice of pancetta each on Sundays, so I can grab a high-protein breakfast on my way out the door to work.
  • ElkeKNJ
    ElkeKNJ Posts: 207 Member
    I don't think his eating habits need improving. He's still eating healthy, isn't he.
    Perhaps he just grew temporary tired of the carbs.
    Perhaps you can make him eat just one spoon of them at every meal. Not too insurmountable for him, and at least he ate some.

    As to breakfast, yes, one of my kids isn't hungry right after waking up either. But our mornings are organised in that fashion that we wake them up more than an hour before we need to leave the house. Often, he gets hungry about 15 minutes before we need to leave...
  • loribethrice
    loribethrice Posts: 620 Member
    I never ate in the morning when I was a kid. I still don't like too. I feel too nauseated to eat from when I first wake up until about an hour later. My mom and sister never eat in the morning either for the same reasons.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    So what? Let the boy eat how and when he wants. I dont understand how forcing kids to eat does anything healthy. He has his own natural hunger signals, and unless if he is just wanting candy and not eating at all - I would not worry about it.

    this.

    also, if its homemade mash, whats wrong with it every day? (other than it being a pain for you to make!)
  • cincysweetheart
    cincysweetheart Posts: 892 Member
    Part of that "pickiness" could just be a phase of the age. He's 4, correct? He's getting old enough to start having opinions of his own and wanting a little more control in his life.This could simply be a normal and healthy part of his development. Granted, I don't *know*… every child is different. I'm offering this as a possibility. But he is eating healthily. He's just being a little picky about the form his carbs take right now. So, I would suggest you not fight him on it. More than likely he will grow out of it.

    As to the breakfast issue… small snacks he can eat on the way or something you can leave in is backpack (Granola bars, bananas, etc. work great for this). I would suggest opening communication with the nursery teacher, explaining the issue. Accommodations can usually be made for him if they are simply made aware ahead of time.
  • evileen99
    evileen99 Posts: 1,564 Member
    I would suggest NOT punishing him for not eating--that's a great way to set up an unhealthy relationship with food. He'll be fine without rice and pasta in his diet.

    I didn't eat breakfast for decades, and still often skip it. It's not for everyone. When he starts going to school earlier in the day, get him up about half an hour earlier than you need to....he may be hungry enough to eat a granola bar or some fruit on the way or just before you leave.
  • martyqueen52
    martyqueen52 Posts: 1,120 Member
    at 4 years old, let him eat whatever he wants.... he's growing.

    Don't feed him Twinkies, oatmeal pies, and processed snacks all day, but, one or two a day won't hurt him.

    If you notice him getting fat / smaller... adjust his food from there.
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
    When I was that age I wanted to eat nothing but waffles. You are very lucky that he eats that well. I would not be too worried, he is just a kid and is otherwise getting good nutrition. If you punish him over this issue, you might bring on bigger problems.
  • Reminds me of my brother when he was little. He used to eat tiny tiny amounts until he hit puberty and got picked for four school sports teams. Now he finishes off half the fridge! I told him off this morning for eating my packet of choc cookies, he polished off four in ten minutes!
  • bigmamabird
    bigmamabird Posts: 55 Member
    I've noticed my kids will go through stages where they'll eat like a pack of starving wolves one week and then next to nothing another. We offer our kids food and figure they'll eat if they're hungry. We don't force them to clean their plates, just try at least a bite of everything, they're just not allowed to whine and complain.

    It sounds like your little guy is eating a healthy diet but that right now his body just doesn't need that much food. Soon enough he'll hit a growth spurt and eat everything in sight.
  • CathOh
    CathOh Posts: 72 Member
    I wouldn't be concerned about him not eating potatoes/ rice/ pasta every day... his vegetables are likely sources of carbs as well. Sounds like he's eating pretty well to me, and just letting you know what his preferences are.

    He'll learn and adjust pretty quickly to his new morning routine. He may be hungry mid-morning (or before his first snack) on the first day, but it likely won't happen again.
  • healthygreek
    healthygreek Posts: 2,137 Member
    Please, please don't punish him for rejecting a certain food.
    Just offer him everything you want him to eat and then stay out of it!
    If you create a drama over this it will only hurt him.
    Let him assert himself in these ways- it's a sign of independence! It's a developmental milestone!
  • melimomTARDIS
    melimomTARDIS Posts: 1,941 Member
    you are lucky. my son has a sensory disorder that restricts his ability to eat a wide variety of foods.

    My son doesnt eat mashed potato, rice, any sort of pasta, almost any vegetables, almost any fruit. Never any meat. Never any eggs.Very little cheese (specific variety). And 1% milk.

    He has a small list of foods he does feel comfortable eating, that he can eat without fear.

    Grains-stovetop popcorn, graham crackers, white bread, plain tortilla/tortilla chips,a few kinds of crackers.

    Protiens- 1% milk, colby jack cheese, peanut butter, hummus (plain), go gurt

    Veggies-corn, iceberg lettuce

    fruit- green apples, strawberry fruit leather, dried cranberries, strawberry nutragrain bars, a few types of juice.

    Fats-ranch dressing,margarine spread

    treats- this list is a bit larger, but still pretty restrictive.

    I had his diet professionally evaluated by his pediatrician and allergist. Suprisingly he gets all he needs on his (limited!) diet. He takes a chewable vitamin with iron, just in case of possible future anemia.

    my son is slim, energetic, and rarely gets ill.

    Anyways, I just wanted to say, if MY son can be healthy on his limited diet, I bet yours is doin' great.
  • J72FIT
    J72FIT Posts: 6,002 Member
    I've tried sending him to the stairs for not eating

    Your son sounds fine.

    I would not punish him for being finicky, all you will accomplish is giving him a complex about food...
  • tabicatinthehat
    tabicatinthehat Posts: 329 Member
    PLEASE don't punish him for not eating what you think he should eat. When my son was 3.5, he didn't eat for literally four days straight and I started to FREAK OUT. Took him to the doctor and she said he was fine. Give him what he wants and don't make a fuss about what he doesn't. He's 12 now and this advice has served us well. He eats a variety of foods, but tends to eat the same foods for a few days, then switch it up. Some days he hardly eats at all, then others he pigs out. What he "likes" and "dislikes" changes pretty rapidly, too. He is slim, active and sharp.

    Don't police the dinner table. You're gonna stir up some issues. Who doesn't have those foods that they refuse to eat because they were forced to eat them as a kid?
  • suej19
    suej19 Posts: 15 Member
    Your son's diet sounds fine to me (mother, grandmother, RN here!)

    Please don't send him to the stairs as punishment - for one he doesn't need to be punished for eating as well as he does and two, it could develop into a behaviour issue and become a battle of wills.

    As for breakfast, my hale and hearty 8 year-old grandson never eats breakfast on a school day - he just can't face it.

    :smile:
  • J72FIT
    J72FIT Posts: 6,002 Member
    Oddly enough we could all probably learn a thing or two about diet from our kids. Since they do not have the ability to "over-think" their diet, they truly listen to their bodies...
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Have you discussed this with his doctor?

    Kids are strange. Their eating habits and tastes change. Punishing him is silly. Keep offering him a variety, maybe bargain with him if he takes a few bites of something that he can have dessert or whatever. And you don't have to eat grains to get carbs.
  • suremeansyes
    suremeansyes Posts: 962 Member
    Meat and veggies is fine! When my daughter was 2 all she ate for like 6 months was toast and Mac n cheese. She still grew, and now she is a 14 year old sports playing machine who eats like a horse. Protein, veggies and all.

    Btw, veggies are carbs too.
  • SailorKnightWing
    SailorKnightWing Posts: 875 Member
    Oddly enough we could all probably learn a thing or two about diet from our kids. Since they do not have the ability to "over-think" their diet, they truly listen to their bodies...
    Kids will eat candy until they throw up given the chance. Then do it again.
  • maceycarey
    maceycarey Posts: 143 Member
    My 4 year old has sensory issues so i know a few things about picky eaters lol
    Just set it in front of him, dont make a big deal about it, dont say this will make you strong or anything like that just put it in front of him and walk away... he will eventually try it trust me on this... the more big deal you make of it the stronger of an aversion he may have
    as to the nursery thing... if he feels hungry before that time one day and does not like it then he will eat in the morning ... trust me he WILL NOT STARVE! and he will not starve himself... its basic human function his body will make him take care of himself... Dont worry so much ;-)
  • Lleldiranne
    Lleldiranne Posts: 5,516 Member
    I have a son who has had similar aversion to starches at that age. Mashed potatoes made him gag. He would happily gobble up a plateful of broccoli but refuse to touch his mac&cheese, etc. He would only eat small amounts of rice. For him, it was largely a texture thing. I figured that the starch was the least important part of the meal, and didn't push it. He got his protein and his veggies. So as long as he had energy and wasn't constantly hungry, I didn't worry about it.

    Fast forward almost 10 years. He still doesn't care for most of those starches, though he will eat small amounts of pasta or potatoes. He is a very healthy teenager who has learned how to stop eating when he is full. He still has plenty of energy and is growing like a teen should and still gobbles up his broccoli :happy:

    Don't push him to eat everything. Encourage one bite to try it, but don't punish him for not eating - that tends to lead to unhealthy relationships with food. Kids tend to know when they've had enough. If he's eating the protein and veggies, don't stress the starches.

    As for breakfast, have something ready that he can eat in the car. Even a cheese stick or cereal bar may be enough to hold him until snack. I'd worry more about getting his sleep schedule reset back to where he's able to get up at 7 without being overly tired, and let the breakfast issue sort itself out.
  • MyOwnSunshine
    MyOwnSunshine Posts: 1,312 Member
    The best advice I've heard from my daughter's pediatrician is this:

    It is the parent's job to prepare and offer a variety of healthy foods. It is the child's job to decide what and how much to eat.
  • maceycarey
    maceycarey Posts: 143 Member
    Oddly enough we could all probably learn a thing or two about diet from our kids. Since they do not have the ability to "over-think" their diet, they truly listen to their bodies...
    Kids will eat candy until they throw up given the chance. Then do it again.

    Not all kids... my youngest would always eat his veggies and meat first... and MAYBE his sweets if he has room
  • amethyst7986
    amethyst7986 Posts: 223 Member
    Kids are normal, like everyone they go through phases with food, clothes, friends, behavior, etc. You can't punish him for no longer liking certain foods or drinks. We learn to listen to our bodies and kids listen better than we do, they aren't as stubborn or overly concern as some adults are.

    I say offer the food to him but don't force him to eat it or get upset when he refuses it. He will eventually come around to liking it or not and you will have to accept that. Sorry to say, it sometimes get worse as they get older...no need in freaking out about it now, you'll be in for a rude awakening when he's able to really voice his likes and dislikes
  • sljohnson1207
    sljohnson1207 Posts: 818 Member
    Don't punish him for his preferences and cause food issues for him in the future. So what, he doesn't want starch right now. He'll likely want it again later. Allow him to follow his own body's signals without pressure to finish all on his plate and eat foods he does not prefer right now. Count your blessings he will even touch a vegetable at all. Give him options and let him choose. If he really starts to nose dive into an unhealthy diet of only wanting candy, soda, chips, and food that is somewhat devoid of nutrition, then worry, but it sounds like he eats very well, and is aware of when he is and is not hungry.

    Honestly, this post screams eating disorder issues to me. Since I've been there myself, I highly recommend you talk to someone (a professional or two) about this so that you have the best chance at raising a healthy child without the same issues with food.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,961 Member
    If he's eating cereal for breakfast, he doesn't need carbs at every meal.
    Veggies are carbs too and contain a lot more nutrients. Potatoes are more nutritious than pasta too. Start trying brown rice and see if he'll eat that since there's more fibre in them.
    Honestly, I wouldn't even be concerned about this. The things you listed are fairly nutrient void. Give him more veggies and fruits instead. And try sweet potatoes.

    Besides, his eating habits will change in a month anyway. My brother's and my sister's kids all went through phases of wanting/not wanting food. Now they have no problem - the oldest one will eat anything. Except ketchup of all things.

    Also, teaching him now to finish everything on his plate might not be for the best. Some people say that's the mentality that gets us all overweight these days because portion sizes are too big but we force ourselves to eat it all anyway. And then we get used to it. So unless you're 100% sure he is not getting enough nutrients unless he eats every single thing you give him, don't worry about it.

    Remember that a child will never let themselves starve. If they get hungry enough, they will eat what you give them to eat.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Also, teaching him now to finish everything on his plate might not be for the best. Some people say that's the mentality that gets us all overweight these days because portion sizes are too big but we force ourselves to eat it all anyway.

    So agree. Forcing kids to eat past hunger is not a good idea.
  • J72FIT
    J72FIT Posts: 6,002 Member
    The best advice I've heard from my daughter's pediatrician is this:

    It is the parent's job to prepare and offer a variety of healthy foods. It is the child's job to decide what and how much to eat.

    Love this...