Just binged on 4000 calories

i ate over 9000 on saturday, no worries!

I suggest you seek some professional help as by your post and the way you are reacting you have issues that need addressing. 125 pounds is only just a healthy weight it is verging on underweight even at 10 pounds heavier when you started your 'diet' your BMI was on the low side. The fact you are binging makes me think you have been restricting too much I suggest a visit to your doctor or medical professional to discuss these issues. I wish you luck

HOORAY!

You had a party! Was it fun? Did you like all the flavors and textures and aromas of your food?

Don't beat yourself up--revel in your occasional hedonism. *Habit* is what determines your weight. Those rare times you cut loose, you should enjoy it thoroughly. You are entitled to enjoy it for your discipline the rest of the time.

You might get a couple of day's stall in weight loss, or a few tenths of a pound weight increase for a few days. But this is not some kind of catastrophe.

Enjoy the memory of the decadence until the next time it's time to cut loose--and next time be wise enough not to guilt yourself over it one teeny bit!

add: and I somehow blew past how the 'counting calories made you obsessive' thought. I also vote for talking to a therapist about possible eating disorders or ocd. Counting calories won't give you an eating disorder or make you obsessive, but can uncover hidden problems that you didn't realize you had. Seeing a therapist now when you haven't been at it long enough to impact your physical health will really pay off in the long run. With therapy you'll be able to diet without all the emotional baggage--or at least with considerably less of it.

1 high calorie meal is not going to make you gain it all back. It's simple math.

maybe dont deny yourself everything you like, it can lead to binges. you dont have to avoid sweets you just have to make them fit. i love them and i have a dessert every day. if i didnt i would probably just binge eventually.

some days i am just ravenously hungry though. i was last night and i kinda stopped fighting it and called it a day. its the exception, not the norm.... just every few weeks i have a day where i want to eat what i want...

as long as it is the exception.

make sure you are eating enough on a day to day basis, it may help curb them. and that you actually need to worry about losing weight.

It sounds like you think you are depriving yourself in someway and that's leading towards the binging so it might be worth trying to incorporate a treat into your day if you feel you need something to look forward to. for example, on some days I'll have a fruit and greek yogurt as a dessert and that feels like a treat for me and prevents any excessive snacking!

I would also try and reasses your relationship with food - don't beat yourself up so much for binging as that will just lead to more binging. We are human and these things happen. Try and figure out what triggers your binges and make a conscious effort to listen to what's going on in your head and try and talk it down otherwise this will keep happening.

I cannot afford a gym membership either so when I first started eating clean and exercising I was splitting my workouts out to half and hour in the morning and half an hour in the evening - this massively helped me stay on track eating wise throughout the day as I didn't want my workouts to go to waste over a chocolate bar that was going to satisfy me for all of 5 minutes. Check out youtube for workout videos as well - there are LOADS.

Don't let counting calories rule life - it's just not fun. Try change your perspective to one of a lifestyle change rather than a diet or short term measure and soon it will all be pretty effortless!

Small daily improvements are the key to staggering long-term results.

Please feel free to add me if you would like to discuss this more - I used to have a major problem with binging!

It looks like you were pretty severely restricting what you ate before you binged. Do you think the deprivation could be causing the urge to binge? That happens with a lot of people dieting too harshly. Be gentle with yourself. If you've cut out a food group, like doing low carb or low fat or whatever, then reconsider it. If your calorie limit is significantly low, or your deficit is too high, reconsider them. If you have a craving for something specific, consider eating it rather than trying to eat around the craving with a whole bunch of other stuff.

OP is not at un underweight BMI. Her BMI is 18.5 which is classified as "normal".

BMI Categories:
Underweight = <18.5
Normal weight = 18.5–24.9
Overweight = 25–29.9
Obesity = BMI of 30 or greater

Now, it might be helpful for her to talk with someone, but get the BMI facts straight.

OP is not at un underweight BMI. Her BMI is 18.5 which is classified as "normal".

She just dieted to get to the absolute LOWEST acceptable BMI for "normal".
18.5 "normal" 18.4 underweight. She was "normal" 10 pounds heavier.

So what? Any of us qualified to be the "BMI police"? If she feels healthy at that weight, it is normal, so stop harping on it. The normal range is like a 30+ pound range. Why would it be any more normal for her to be 135 vs 125 vs 155: all in the "normal" BMI range.

OP is not at un underweight BMI. Her BMI is 18.5 which is classified as "normal".

She just dieted to get to the absolute LOWEST acceptable BMI for "normal".
18.5 "normal" 18.4 underweight. She was "normal" 10 pounds heavier.

So what? Any of us qualified to be the "BMI police"? If she feels healthy at that weight, it is normal, so stop harping on it. The normal range is like a 30+ pound range. Why would it be any more normal for her to be 135 vs 125 vs 155: all in the "normal" BMI range.

I've been here a while. I've seen many of these threads.
Best of luck on your journey.

To me, bingeing means that you feel as if you cannot control what goes into your mouth. That is not a good place to be, mentally, whether it means that you undereat or overeat regularly, or have some other eating dysfunction.

I am not a professional who can say whether you have an eating disorder, but it does not sound like you have a healthy or happy relationship with food.

You wrote "I am disgusting". So sad! You are anything but disgusting. You deserve to treat yourself better and love who you are.

Talk to a therapist and see a nutritionist and figure out what "healthy" eating is, and how to do it, from the professionals.

There are some good comments on MFP (including mine - ha ha), but that is no substitute for medical advice.

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38 degrees celsius actually! thanks guys, I think I will seek help!

I believe this is a good idea....Goodluck.

For future purpose, i am not an expert but mathematically ....Female, 5.9', 19yrs, 125lbs puts you at a healthy BMI of 18.5 BUT Female, 5.9', 19yrs, 124lbs puts you at an unhealthy underweight BMI of 18.3

and have been counting calories obsessively.

There is nothing wrong with counting calories obsessively, don't be worried or feel bad about this.

about a month ago I developed a binge eating disorder, and now it's blowing way out of control. Sometimes I have 4000 calorie binges.

Also nothing wrong with this if it is under control and done properly, most of us have cheat days and i am sure we sometime hit 4000 calories. Not counting Breakfast, lunch or Dinner. I had 3 4.5square inc chocolate cake with cream cheese icing on Friday, each one is 1000 calories. i am sure i hit 4000 easily on Friday. However i do not do this everyday and because i log my food i am aware i have had this cheat day and make up for it on other days. However the key is that, i control this or like to think i do anyway.

I know, i'm disgusting and i'm probably going to gain all the weight back i worked so hard to lose. Will this binge do severe harm to my body? I almost never have sugar, but i ate so much today? and any tips on how to avoid this?

I don't think you are disgusting, as long as it is not a disorder it will not do any severe harm to your body. Which is why i feel that your decision to talk to a professional is the best. Best case scenario you will be able to identify if it is a disorder. Regarding tips, personally i have found eliminating sugar entirely does not work for me, i may be sugar free for 1 month, but if someone blow icing sugar in my direction...oh dear... i start the whole sugar again and start binging, i try not to be too restrictive, it does not work for me and leads to binging. what works for me is giving in to my "sugar" need every now and then and then making up for it. E.g on Friday and Saturday...i may go crazy on cake, chocolate and ice cream and Sunday to Thursday only have fruits and yogurt as desserts instead of cakes and ice cream

I was thinking of stopping counting calories, as it has made me a hyper obsessive person...thanks!

I dont believe this is the problem. In my opinion it probably helped, by counting you recognised when there was a problem. If you did not count it may not have been obvious

.......

Goodluck in whatever you decide

It is possible to have an eating disorder and be of normal weight. But the ED will eventually lead someone out of the normal weight zone.

The problem with an ED is the attitude toward food and eating, sometimes with an associated mis-perception of one's own body shape or conditioning--"body dysmorphia", and often with issues about feeling 'control' in some aspect of life.

The result is a lot of suffering by the person with the ED, and negative impact on social relationships as loved ones become concerned (and often meddlesome as a result of that concern).

I don't necessarily agree, as many people with binge eating disorder are overweight and many people with bulimia are normal to overweight, though I know some are underweight as well. For anorexia, yes, I would agree that one could be normal weight and anorexic, but that individual would, most likely, get to the underweight category. But I am not qualified to make a diagnosis, especially based on what the OP wrote, that she is suffering from any type of mental illness and/ or eating disorder. I'm only saying that, at this point, she is not considered to be "underweight" by standard BMI charts. That might change tomorrow and, if it does, can be re-evaluated then. People seem to be so fine when someone hits a BMI of 24.9 so that they are not "overweight" anymore. So why are people so quick to jump on "you got a problem, you're underweight" when one's BMI is 18.5?

A previous poster said she dieted until she got to the LOWEST possible "normal" BMI and implied that this was a problem. But if one diets to the HIGHEST possible "normal" BMI, that is perfectly acceptable? Sounds like a double standard you cannot win.

Based on the OP the entirety of the OP, do YOU believe she's in a healthy place with food?

Actually, no I don't. But in no way is it because of her BMI. And, I repeat, I'm not a psychologist or psychiatrist or any kind of a doctor and, therefore, my opinion counts for nothing. Only she is going to know if there is a problem. And even people who are anorexic, even if they deny it to everyone else, know that there is something wrong.