Here we go again....

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sasha_z
sasha_z Posts: 2
in Introduce Yourself
Hello everyone,

I'm one of those girls who has been told she was fat since she was 4 years old and been on numerous diets so this has been a long journey already :)

I used to go to a private public school, where I wasn't very popular...mostly due to the fact that my parents weren't as wealthy as the other childrens...and I stood out in the way i dressed and where I lived.
I would go home after school and stay in my room, play by myself and eat. That is basically what I did...I ate. I was not very active since I didn't like standing out, and I had built up this image in my head that I was a huge monster that would not be accepted anywhere.
When I look at pictures of myself as a child, I of course see that I was not a fat child, maybe 7 - 11 lbs overweight, nothing a healthy diet and exercise couldn't have fixed back then....but that is too late now :p

2 years ago, I suddenly became very sad. A lot of problems had accumulated and I felt this huge sadness in my chest. I lost my appetite and I lost 33lbs in aprox 6 months... but not in a healthy way. I would not eat...and the little I ate...I would throw up again. I felt better...I felt lighter and purer for some unexplainable reason. I of course quickly realized how easy it suddenly was for me to lose weight so it somehow became an obsession...weighing myself every morning, every evening, after every meal and after every time I threw up.

I realized that the amazing guy that I was dating, I was about to loose, because he had become aware of my problems. I realized that I wasn't doing this in a healthy way and that I was only hurting myself.

So now...after getting better mentally....and gaining a lot of lbs....going back to what I used to weigh, I am for the first time ever in my life....ready to do this the right way.
So I am hoping for your support...because honestly...this is very scary :)

All the luck and love
Sasha

Replies

  • gimedatnow
    gimedatnow Posts: 173 Member
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    Hi Sasha,
    Wow, your story is so powerful and inspirational, and I wish you the best this time around!
    Cheers,
    Jenny
  • pcmoore
    pcmoore Posts: 53 Member
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    Glad you are here Sasha! You are in a wonderful place for support! You can do this and in a way that is not hurting you more than it's helping which you now know, your old way was! Best of luck to you and you will find a lot of wonderful people here. All in the same boat...all at different places but all with the same ultimate goal, to be healthy and loose weight.
  • Seesaa
    Seesaa Posts: 451
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    Welcome aboard!
  • DoralisM
    DoralisM Posts: 80
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    WoW...welcome miss Sasha and so glad to hear you are doing better and no longer sick! We in this together and YES it is scary but definitely worth it. I'm sick and tired of holding in my stomach to take pictures, or when I have rolls on the sides or not be able to wear a 2 piece bathing suit! Good luck and if you need a friend u are most welcomed to send me a request. :flowerforyou:
  • xlacijeanx
    xlacijeanx Posts: 232 Member
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    Welcome to MFP! I'm glad you're finding the right attitude to want to do this the healthy way this time around! You deserve to be happy! Bets of luck! :)
  • Ding724
    Ding724 Posts: 791 Member
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    Hey girl! Your story sounds alot like mine...I'm glad that you found MFP & are ready to lose weight the best & healthiest way there is!!! Add me as a friend if you want some support :flowerforyou:
  • snowness
    snowness Posts: 71
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    Welcome and congrats on doing this the right way! If you are looking for a friend and some support feel free to add me :)
  • ChelleBelle1
    ChelleBelle1 Posts: 34 Member
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    Welcome to MFP! As others have said, you are in the right in place. There is so much support here. Congratulations on taking this positive step forward. I wish you luck in reaching your goals, and feel free to friend me if you wish. I will do my best to send lots of support your way!
  • emsmommy9
    emsmommy9 Posts: 9 Member
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    Powerful story!! Thanks for sharing. Good luck reaching your goal - this is the best possible way to do it, and MFP is a great tool!
  • sasha_z
    sasha_z Posts: 2
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    Thank you guys so much for all of your positive words and friend adds :)

    It's amazing...I never expected this kind of support :)

    Luck and love! :)
  • ingeborgv
    ingeborgv Posts: 175 Member
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    Welcome to MFP, you'll find a great bunch of supporters here. Feel free to add me as a friend if you like. Best of luck on your weight loss project!
  • Glos_Bloke
    Glos_Bloke Posts: 74
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    Welcome! I'm new around here myself.

    Best of luck on your journey! You CAN do it! :wink:
  • jilld76
    jilld76 Posts: 324
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    welcome Sasha! I've only been here for a few days but really like what I see so far. Good luck on your journey!
  • jkestens63
    jkestens63 Posts: 1,164 Member
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    Absolutely have our support - you can do this!!!!! I've been a heavy girl all my life too and now at 47 I'm finally fit and happy. I actually see a future and don't worry about dieing like I used to. So just develop a lifestyle that works for you, remember its a marathon and not a sprint so its going to take lots of time, and every moment ask yourself if the choice you are making will move you closer to or further from your goal? If you can answer closer to 85% of the time, you'll get there.

    Good luck!!!

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