Retail Rudeness

Pause a moment and consider what these 'sizing specialists' are getting paid... I mean how much training does one need to wield a tape measure accurately?? I cringed for you reading your post but I encourage you to imagine the very people who criticized you standing before you in their (probably not VS) undies. We are all unique. Even those ladies...

I love VS but have never been fitted and don't generally talk to the staff. I just try on until one fits and is comfortable.

I am a weird shape. I have large breasts and my legs have always been thin and I am short waisted. Basically, an inverted triangle shape with most of my 5'9" height in my legs. It doesn't matter where I shop I get attitude. For a long time I really liked buying shirts at Lane Bryant. But I started getting attitude from them because I was "too skinny". I wore a size 14/16 shirt. Why was I too small? And then in other stores I got the other attitude because the buttons pulled and they "just didn't have anything above a 12". What? And pants are almost always too short too.
It's fine, the internet rocks. Shop online there is a bigger selection anyway . If they want to know why retail stores are suffering it is because customer service is terrible. People need to be kind and have common courtesy. I worked in retail for years, until I was in my early 30's. It isn't just the clerks who are rude. The customers are too. We live in a culture where people say whatever they please and think they have a right to say it. That may be true, but that doesn't mean it's ok to be rude and hurt someone's feelings.

Go to herroom.com there are great directions for measuring yourself for a bra and it even has a universal size because different bras size differently (all 34 B bras do not fit the same way). Good luck

VS is actually pretty notorious for this kind of thing. Much like Abercrombie & Fitch has received criticism for not catering to a variety of shapes and sizes, and even admittedly said they cater to "cool" (ie not fat, not poor, not of lower socio-economic status), Victoria'sSecret very specifically caters to "straight sizes" and heavily promotes beauty stigma. If you aren't thin, conventionally attractive, don't expect them to go out of their way. A bra store that only carries up to -maybe- a DD if you're lucky in select sizes and kicked a woman out for breast feeding (because that's not what breasts are for???) doesn't sit too well with most people. But their signs are pink and covered in glitter, so people still get lured in.

The best bra fitting I ever had was at the Bali/Playtex/ etc, etc outlet store at the outlet mall. They were professional and the comments the person made were matter of fact about my size and shape, not anything that made me feel denigrated. I also learned about the "four boob" from her.

That's why I shop online.
BTW, every website has a size guide, just measure yourself and find out what size you are. Not rocket science.

Unfortunately it isn't always that easy for bras. Some women are fuller on the top half of the bust and some on the bottom. The exact cut of the cups fit different on different women with the same measurements.

I worked in retail for roughly 14 years. If I had EVER spoken that way to a customer, I might as well just grabbed my pocketbook, and gone to the house. Rightfully so. That is ridiculous. It would've been like me looking at one of my customers saying, "Your skin is such an odd color, hold on a minute, let me go get another of my co-workers, I want her to look at you and see if this foundation matches well, it's so "odd". Yeah. No. You don't do that. There's something to be said for professionalism. If you don't like your job, there are plenty of other people who will. Feel free to make a complaint about this. I absolutely would. Teenager, or not, that's not professional, and if we're going to CHOOSE to serve the public, we need to do so in a dignified manner.

With that being said, you didn't mention your height, only your clothing size- 10/12. Unless you happen to be exceptionally short, I'm really gonna have to go out on a limb and say they got that measurement hella wrong. I'm 5'8, 225lbs, 14W/16W in clothing, and I wear a 40DDD in a bra. I remember, one time I was measured by my old boss (this was when I was still heavy), she told me I needed something like a 52F. Well, lo and behold, I found a 52F in a store. It didn't remotely fit. The thing was so huge all the way around. I wore a 48DDD back then.

I know a lot of different people have different experiences with them, but I can say in my area, Lane Bryant has been awesome with me from when I was extremely heavy, and even now, that I wear the smallest size they carry. They've always been very kind and respectful. If you're thinking about being re-measured, that might be an option for you.

So sorry this happened to you, don't let people who have NO clue what they're talking about get you down-- congrats on your progress!

Okay, I'm going to take this to a whole different level here. Maybe people will hate me, maybe they won't. We'll see what happens.

I worked for 5 years in the lingerie section of Macy's. I was VERY good at measuring and for the most part, I could just estimate sizes by looking at someone.

From what you described, it sounds like you have a large ribcage with a smaller bust. This is a lot less common than a small ribcage with a big bust and you will likely have difficulties finding a large selection of bras (although the latter can be difficult too). This does not necessary reflect on your weight as much as your build. What you have is a rare combination because if your band size was from weight, you would have a larger cup size. Since you do not, this is likely from you having a larger frame. I came across a few ladies that had hard time finding bras because of this.

What you want to look for is a soft cup wireless bra. It provides the stretch you need and the fit you want.

Note: I am not defending the ladies. I understand what they were thinking but of course their wording was a little crass. As a former bra specialist though, I think they were commenting on your frame size more than your weight.

This sounds reasonable. I have a sister who has that same concern and always ends up with the soft cup wireless. She is most comfortable in them and has given up on the 'sexy' bra styles. They treated her horribly at VS as well. I refuse to step foot in the one where I live. However, there is a larger one in the larger city within an hour's drive and they are amazing with their customer service.

Thanks for all the replys…it's nice to hear other's experience and know I'm not alone.

I FINALLY got measured at great store, one of my fellow busty ladies told me about….32 F…so kind of a freak of nature apparently hahaha…oh well, at least I know my size and finally found bras that fit correctly!

So very glad you had a better experience! Care to share the name of the store (if it's a chain)?

This is kind of absurd to me. Of all the women I've seen naked or close to naked, none of them generally look the same. Especially boobies! So unless you have some OBVIOUS deformity, which I'm sure you would be aware of, I just can't imagine a grown woman thinking a woman's body was "odd" or "misshapen". What? Sorry you went through that. That's terrible customer service and just a complete lack of common sense. What woman wouldn't be offended if someone called their body weird? I never get fitted anyway...I think there's confusion between my boobies and back-fat cuz my numbers are always wacky. I wear comfortably a 40DD and they always wanna come up with a higher cup size and I swim in them.

Having never wore a bra in my life .. I have nothing. But .. retail is like this, if you don't like what you got ... there are other places. It is all about having the power to make that decision.

It is very simple .. and why Target has lost a billion dollars here. People just did not like them.

Thanks for all the replys…it's nice to hear other's experience and know I'm not alone.

I FINALLY got measured at great store, one of my fellow busty ladies told me about….32 F…so kind of a freak of nature apparently hahaha…oh well, at least I know my size and finally found bras that fit correctly!

A 32F? I stand corrected. Those ladies really didn't know what they were talking about. I'm assuming you got a contour bra with underwire for support. If you are still planning on losing weight, your band size will stay the same but your cup size will not. Be prepared for that.

32F! And they were trying to put you in a 42B! I'm still going to be laughing next week!

You know what the problem is, then - they don't go above a DDD cup. According to a bra measurement site, I'm an American 38E - I put my measurements in to their website.... got the following message:

We're having trouble finding your size.
Try again or visit your nearest Store.

Hahahaha because going to the store would make one of their bras magically fit me? Or because 'hey we can still maybe make a sale if we shoehorn the twins in there'?

I have to say, though, I completely disagree with anyone saying to buy bras online. The actual cut and style of the bra makes a huge difference, more than you'd think. Any bra-fitter worth her salt would know that your 'size' is pretty variable depending on different styles and will make sure that you're wearing the size that actually fits best rather than what it says on the tag. There's no shop local to me that does a decent bra-fitting so I always stock up elsewhere... last time I walked in wearing a 34E (yeah, I'd put on weight since I'd bought it :grumble: ) and walked out with a 38DD, and two 36Fs. You're always going to get a better fit if you can try them out before buying them.... and it's worth it even if you have to wait.

Retail rudeness is rampant these days. My recourse is my wallet. I don't spend one more thin dime in establishments where I've been treated poorly.

I agree with this. I know in my area David's Bridal has such a terrible reputation from bad customer service and ridiculous practices and policies...a few years ago I worked closely with a lot of brides who were planning weddings and across the board they would all boycott the store due to horror stories from friends. I see David's Bridal still seems to be successful but that's gotta hurt somewhere down the line.