Super Policy or Food Police Gone Wild?

god forbid someone doesn't get a turn!?

that's life. blame the parents for having the kid in the summer. perhaps if they weren't bad parents and cared enough about their kids they would have made sure they were born during the school year.

:noway: Whoa, What?!? :noway:
What kind of logic is that??
What about this...my birthday is Sept 27th...there's 6 kids in my family.
My parents had to clothe us and get us ALL school required stuff and still have my birthday in there somewhere.
My youngest sisters birthday is Dec 7th which is just weeks before Christmas...for 8 people plus relatives and some close special friends.
No sooner after Christmas we have 3 birthday in Jan...of the 6 kids the last birthday is mid June, pretty close to when school would end for the school yr.
So I believe most of us kids got the short(er) end of the stick when it came to ours and NOT because it was in the summer :ohwell:

It's sad that nowadays kids can't have a treat here and there. But I do see both sides, there are so many food allergies. I actually try not to give my son pb if he will be around other kids shortly. What about sending in a non food item. Like pencils with your child's favorite character? Or some other little toy or trinket?

Our district has a policy against homemade food, too, but it is more because of possible cross-contamination for allergies and foodbourne illness. We do have the wellness program for the lunch program, but the parents were able to bring in prepackaged snacks and treats for special events, like birthdays. Even for the school bake sales, we were asked to buy baked goods from the local grocery stores, instead of making them ourselves.

I always got around the rule, though, because I used my commercial kitchen for my treats!

I think it's ridiculous. You can't even breathe anymore without someone having something to say about it. I'd be pissed off if they did that at my kid's school. What about Valentine's day? Or Halloween? Are those off limits too? Ugh! LIfe is no fun anymore.

As a suggestion, though, maybe you could send in pencils with birthday balloons on them, or party hats, or something like that just so your little one can celebrate.

But, why do we need to celebrate all the birthdays, V-day, Halloween, Chrismahanakuanza in school, with food, for life to be fun? Why not celebrate at home, with family, where you don't have to worry about outside allergies, insensitivies, economic conditions, time, etc.

If we need to celebrate in schools, then why not play a game/sing a song/do some arts and crafts instead of food? This eliminates the allergy problem and the financial problem.

What do you think? Super Policy or Food Police Gone Wild?

I think it's a good policy. Food preferences or allergies aside, I don't think it's good to have individual celebrations for birthdays at school. Something once a month for all the children with birthdays in that month would be fine, but a parent bringing in food to celebrate their individual child's birthday could just lead to sadness for another child whose parents can't afford to do this or don't care to do it or don't do it for whatever reason.

Personal celebrations are better kept at home.

I think it's ridiculous. You can't even breathe anymore without someone having something to say about it. I'd be pissed off if they did that at my kid's school. What about Valentine's day? Or Halloween? Are those off limits too? Ugh! LIfe is no fun anymore.

As a suggestion, though, maybe you could send in pencils with birthday balloons on them, or party hats, or something like that just so your little one can celebrate.

But, why do we need to celebrate all the birthdays, V-day, Halloween, Chrismahanakuanza in school, with food, for life to be fun? Why not celebrate at home, with family, where you don't have to worry about outside allergies, insensitivies, economic conditions, time, etc.

If we need to celebrate in schools, then why not play a game/sing a song/do some arts and crafts instead of food? This eliminates the allergy problem and the financial problem.

I know that a lot of adults here in this forum who are trying to lose weight need to learn the hard lesson that you CAN celebrate without sweets, fatty food, and other indulgences like that. That there are fun things you can do that don't involve eating. And here we are, insisting that our kids have the right to develop those habits in the first place... If y'all can't think of any way to celebrate that doesn't involve everyone eating cupcakes, I wonder if your children will end up on MFP in 20 years having to un-learn the same lessons.

Here we are on a fitness site, fighting tooth and nail for the right to teach our kids the same bad habits we are trying to kick...

The school my friend's son attends (my daughter will be going there next year) has a strict food policy. She is not allowed to send anything deemed "unhealthy" (chocolate, candy, anything like that) for her son for lunch. If there is "contraband" in his lunch, they send a note telling her to ensure that he has only healthy food from now on.

This would not be ok with me, especially at a public school. A private school can make whatever rules they want since you can choose which private school to send your kids to based on their policies and beliefs.

I decide what is healthy for my child, not the school. There is usually a small dessert in my daughter's lunch box. Today its a small dip container of mini marshmallows. In the past I've sent Hershey Kisses or other tiny candies. There is nothing wrong with these foods and as a parent it is my responsibility, not the school's or the government's, to decide what foods fit into a healthy diet for my kid.

I do understand the rules about sending in food to share. It's easier to just make a blanket, "No food" policy than to try to make rules that cover every allergy or everyone's version of healthy. I'm planning to send a non food treat for daughter's birthday this year. I know I do not want to be responsible for a kid going into anaphylatic shock because I misunderstood a policy or misread a label. In a way a blanket "No food brought for the class" policy saves the school from being the food police. They are making no judgments on what is healthy or Un healthy. They don't have to constantly adjust or fine tune the complicated rule to fit a kid that comes in with a new type of allergy. Every parent sends whatever their own kid can eat and do sent worry about anyone else's restrictions. I actually think I like that better than the hodge podge of this is OK that is not policy our school has.

If every kid brings in cupcakes then theres like 25 days of extra cake. It ends up being a lot.
My sons class last yr had a lotof restrictions. His school had all whole wheat,no fried food etc. Its not bad. You can have cupcakes at home.

I totally agree also, have all the cupcakes at home.

I get the whole food allergy thing but it was a non-issue when I was growing up. We had bake sales, kids brought in food for their birthdays etc. etc. and it was never an issue. I think now people are being overly sensitive about the allergies. I mean kids can't even bring in a good old fashioned PB&J sandwich for lunch because poor little Timmy is allergic to peanut butter OR if they do the kid who brings in the sandwich is isolated and has to eat by themselves. Why not make Timmy go into quarantine and eat alone with his allergy friends? If someone wants to bring something in to celebrate a birthday or what have you then let the teacher know ahead of time so s/he can send a note home with the kids saying it's going to happen then let the PARENT of the child decide whether or not they want their kid to partake in it.

This is just another way to make all kids feel equal like the whole "every one is a winner" crap.

I used to think like this until I met and spent time with people who have severe peanut allergies. The way they have to think about everything just to avoid DEATH is heart-wrenching. Their kid already feels alone and isolated. Your approach would just make it worse and I think that's cruel.

Maybe I have a softer heart, but my need (or my kid's need) to have a PB&J sandwich is not nearly as important as a child's life and health, both mentally and physically.

And this has nothing to do with the "everyone wins" crap. I'm adamantly against trophies for everyone, or green pen because red is scary . I think that's stupid.

Everyone wins when nobody goes into anaphylactic shock, that's for sure.

It's so heartless to me to not have sympathy for the kids with the special dietary needs and restrictions. Why can't we plan a celebration that includes them, and doesn't threaten their lives or well-being? Just imagine the years-long isolation of being the one kid who doesn't get to partake in any of these things. There's a big difference between giving kids "everybody wins" awards just for showing up, and respecting the health and well-being of everyone present.

What the hell are "allergy friends", anyway? How come the kids with the allergies don't get to be friends with anyone, like the rest of us? Is this a joke?

I think they meant the other kids with allergies and just worded it badly.

Honest question, not meant to be snark or as sarcasm:

What do these kids with food allergies do in the rest of the world outside of school? Certainly everywhere else doesn't rearrange itself so they don't come in contact with whatever they're allergic to - do they not go anyplace where there is or has been food? No mall (food court), restaurant, friend's house, public event, etc?

I get the whole food allergy thing but it was a non-issue when I was growing up. We had bake sales, kids brought in food for their birthdays etc. etc. and it was never an issue. I think now people are being overly sensitive about the allergies. I mean kids can't even bring in a good old fashioned PB&J sandwich for lunch because poor little Timmy is allergic to peanut butter OR if they do the kid who brings in the sandwich is isolated and has to eat by themselves. Why not make Timmy go into quarantine and eat alone with his allergy friends? If someone wants to bring something in to celebrate a birthday or what have you then let the teacher know ahead of time so s/he can send a note home with the kids saying it's going to happen then let the PARENT of the child decide whether or not they want their kid to partake in it.

This is just another way to make all kids feel equal like the whole "every one is a winner" crap.

I used to think like this until I met and spent time with people who have severe peanut allergies. The way they have to think about everything just to avoid DEATH is heart-wrenching. Their kid already feels alone and isolated. Your approach would just make it worse and I think that's cruel.

Maybe I have a softer heart, but my need (or my kid's need) to have a PB&J sandwich is not nearly as important as a child's life and health, both mentally and physically.

And this has nothing to do with the "everyone wins" crap. I'm adamantly against trophies for everyone, or green pen because red is scary . I think that's stupid.

Everyone wins when nobody goes into anaphylactic shock, that's for sure.

It's so heartless to me to not have sympathy for the kids with the special dietary needs and restrictions. Why can't we plan a celebration that includes them, and doesn't threaten their lives or well-being? Just imagine the years-long isolation of being the one kid who doesn't get to partake in any of these things. There's a big difference between giving kids "everybody wins" awards just for showing up, and respecting the health and well-being of everyone present.

What the hell are "allergy friends", anyway? How come the kids with the allergies don't get to be friends with anyone, like the rest of us? Is this a joke?

I think they meant the other kids with allergies and just worded it badly.

Honest question, not meant to be snark or as sarcasm:

What do these kids with food allergies do in the rest of the world outside of school? Certainly everywhere else doesn't rearrange itself so they don't come in contact with whatever they're allergic to - do they not go anyplace where there is or has been food? No mall (food court), restaurant, friend's house, public event, etc?

The kids with allergies are no more likely to be natural friends than any other arbitrary grouping of kids. There's no reason that a kid with peanut allergies and a kid with seafood allergies should be expected to be automatic BFFs just because it's convenient for the other children if they go away.

Obviously these kids have a lot to learn about living in the world, and avoiding foods that will not be good for them. But kids are kids, and they're still learning. I know my husband suffered with a dairy allergy when he was a kid, and it took a long time for him to learn for himself to avoid it - if it was at a friend's birthday party, and friend's parents weren't aware of the issue, he'd eat it anyway. You have to take more precautions with kids because they don't always understand what they're eating or the seriousness of the consequences. I imagine that in a school setting, it's easiest and safest just to avoid the issue.

It's easy enough to send your child to a friend's house and tell the parent when you drop them off about the peanut allergy. It's much tougher to broadcast that information to every parent of every classmate and expect them to remember it for a whole year whenever they make treats.

As someone with some food sensitivities myself, as well as some previous voluntary restrictions (vegetarianism), I learned a lot about when other people prepare food for you. I've had friends serve me chicken, as a vegetarian, and then when I object, say - "But I thought you were a vegetarian? Chicken should be fine!" They were genuinely confused about what the issue was! I have very good friends who I've known for years, who are aware of my lactose intolerance, who still absent-mindedly suggest we go out for pizza or order an ice cream drink at a bar. Even with my best friends, I still have to ask questions about the ingredients in the snack they made, or suggest alternate restaurants, all the time.

Getting others to abide by your rules long-term is extremely challenging. And kids can't necessarily be counted on to be vigilant themselves. It's hard, it really is.

One final side note - kids can be so messy! Much messier than adults. Totally within the realm of possibility that a kid with a PB sandwich will get some on his face, absently wipe it off with the back of his arm, and then wrestle with his friends on the playground at recess right afterwards, transferring small amounts of it elsewhere. Or even if he does go to wash his hands, what if he gets some on the faucet handle, and doesn't realize it, and then the allergic kid uses the same handle? Getting PB on your skin COULD send you into shock, if your allergy is severe enough. This is far less likely to happen in a mall, or an office when they're older, or even in high school. Being restrictive in grade school doesn't mean none of us can ever bring personal food into public again.

Honest question, not meant to be snark or as sarcasm:

What do these kids with food allergies do in the rest of the world outside of school? Certainly everywhere else doesn't rearrange itself so they don't come in contact with whatever they're allergic to - do they not go anyplace where there is or has been food? No mall (food court), restaurant, friend's house, public event, etc?

Depending on the severity, no they may not. Some parents even call those numbers on food products (you know the 800 numbers listed in the fine print below the ingredients) to verify how the food was prepared or processed.

I have a nephew with severe food allergies (multiple foods). They rarely eat out, but when they do his mother takes Lysol wipes and a sterile plastic disposable placemat, and brings his food.

Oh, and you never EVER leave home without 2 Epi-pens.

I think it's a fine policy. I like that it applies equally to ALL FOODS so it's not inherently labeling some foods good and some foods bad.

It's an excellent time for kids to learn that we can celebrate and be made to feel special WITHOUT FOOD.

Just because baking cupcakes and treats and bringing them into schools to share with the class is something that was done in the past, does not mean it's something necessary or was even a good idea.

Didn't read all replies so someone might have said this already. I don't have kids, but I am a social worker so I meet a lot of them and are in contact with a loot of schools and preschools.

Usually, if it's someones birthday the parents are not allowed to send stuff. Sometimes the school will provide something tasty, like ice cream or fruit. The main reason for this is that schools can't expect all children to have parents that can afford or have the ability to do something for the entire class. All kids should have the same opportunities, at least while in school. No kids should be singled out as the ones who didn't bring cupcakes, or whatever. So the school makes sure that while in school, it's the same celebration for every student.

The kids can then have birthday parties or whatever and celebrate outside of school.

I think this is a sound policy.

For what it's worth, in France when I was growing up, nobody ever bought any food from home anyway. It was either going home for lunch or cafeteria food. So I don't see anything wrong with not allowing outside food at school anyway...

But I'm thinking of the parents with kids with deadly allergies and really I don't see it as a bad thing at all to ban homemade stuff... Plus the kids who have Summer birthdays or whose parents can't afford/don't want birthday treats at school don't get left out this way.

The school's under no obligation to have a mini party for every child there. Have the party outside school times, I'm sure the child won't feel any less like the special snowflake it is.

This is what we did in the US in the '70s and '80s, at least where I grew up. This "everyone must celebrate my child's birthday with a class party" thing seems like the weird new thing to me.