Should I disclose to personal trainer...?

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HereLieWe
HereLieWe Posts: 233 Member
in Fitness and Exercise
Lately, I've been going to see a personal trainer. Each time, I feel so sore for the next few days that it hurts to even move. My personal trainer thinks that I'm a guy but I'm actually a female. Therefore, I have more body fat than a male of my size and weight. I'm also very unfit and have about 20-15 lbs to lose before I reach my ideal weight. I don't want to tell my personal trainer that I'm a girl but these workouts are really hard. Do you think I should?

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  • alb92t
    alb92t Posts: 5 Member
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    I guess it depends on what your reasons are for not wanting to share that with them. That information might make a difference, and if they're a true professional I'm sure they could keep it to themselves, but there's no way to know that for sure.
  • HereLieWe
    HereLieWe Posts: 233 Member
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    I guess it depends on what your reasons are for not wanting to share that with them. That information might make a difference, and if they're a true professional I'm sure they could keep it to themselves, but there's no way to know that for sure.
    I'm just pretty uncomfortable about the thought of sharing it. My personal trainer is rather young, in his twenties, I'd say, and although I like to think he'd handle it well, I don't want to risk being either insulted, refused service, or having my secret spread.
  • aimforhealthy
    aimforhealthy Posts: 449 Member
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    Do you think maybe just telling him that you're not in as good a shape as he thinks you are and that you feel really terrible after your workouts may help? As your personal trainer, he really needs to listen to you on this. Even if you were, in fact, wrong that the workouts are too hard for you, clearly that's how YOU feel, and you'd still benefit from working out at a slightly lower intensity and work your way back up.
  • thehungerartiste
    thehungerartiste Posts: 6
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    I highly doubt that they would respond that way and I really think it would benefit you to tell him!

    However, it's completely justified to be uncomfortable telling him that. Maybe you can just tell him that it's been too intense? Explain that you've been TOO sore and ask if you can go a little easier. Even just doing that should be good.

    It would be better for you to at least tell him that you need to take it slower than not say anything because by working yourself TOO hard you're putting yourself at risk of injury.
  • squishycatmew
    squishycatmew Posts: 151 Member
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    Could you simply tell your trainer that you are having problems with significant soreness, to the point of it being debilitating? A good trainer should be able to modify the workouts they give their clients based on the clients' feedback and needs, and "I need to not hurt for three days after" is a legitimate need.

    (How often do you work out, by the way? You shouldn't be sore in the same places after every workout unless you are incorporating novel movements or higher weights every time, and pushing through the pain (unless it's an actual injury) at the next workout usually helps resolve the soreness.)
  • MJ_Watson
    MJ_Watson Posts: 180 Member
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    I can understand your hesitancy to disclose. I'd like to think your trainer would be professional about it, but there's no way for me to know that. In a perfect world, I'd say it's best to give him as much information about your body as possible to get the best benefit from your sessions, but if that makes you too uncomfortable, how about simply telling him the workouts are too intense and painful and asking him to step them down a bit? You're the client, and you're paying him to help you. I can't imagine he'd refuse a request like that.
  • Josephine237
    Josephine237 Posts: 72 Member
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    I say be honest in who you are if you can't trust your trainer to be professional then you need a different trainer.
  • 21million
    21million Posts: 113 Member
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    Unless there are gender specific exercises (I honestly don't know) your sex is your business and yours alone in this case. Tell him that it is too demanding and you need to slow down, period.
  • julie2407
    julie2407 Posts: 44 Member
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    I don't think you need to disclose, since you've already said you don't want to. While everybody is supposed to be professional, once it's out, it's out, and totally understand not wanting to risk it. Just talk about the amount you are hurting after workouts, like others have said. That's really all he needs to know:)
  • HereLieWe
    HereLieWe Posts: 233 Member
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    Thank you, everyone. Admittedly, it didn't even occur to me to tell him that the workouts were too strenuous. At our next session, I'll ask him if he could lighten the workout some. I appreciate all your nice, helpful answers.

    To answer your question, squishycatmew, I've been going to the trainer twice a week ( I've only gone about three times though). We do different exercises each time. this last time, I could hardly sit down after the workout, and even now, two days later, I have to aim for the seat and fall into it instead of bending down to sit.
  • katysmelly
    katysmelly Posts: 380 Member
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    The only physiological difference I've heard of in regards to weight exercises is that, due to female hips being angled differently to facilitate childbirth, squatting movements may benefit from different toe placement. That is, female hips are angled outward and so when doing squats, a female would benefit from turning toe outward slightly.

    Other than that... too hard is just plain too hard. If you're feeling fatigued and/or sore a couple of days later, then it's too hard. Your trainer may also expect you to gain muscle mass as fast as a man or lose weight as fast as a man.
  • HereLieWe
    HereLieWe Posts: 233 Member
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    The only physiological difference I've heard of in regards to weight exercises is that, due to female hips being angled differently to facilitate childbirth, squatting movements may benefit from different toe placement. That is, female hips are angled outward and so when doing squats, a female would benefit from turning toe outward slightly.

    Other than that... too hard is just plain too hard. If you're feeling fatigued and/or sore a couple of days later, then it's too hard. Your trainer may also expect you to gain muscle mass as fast as a man or lose weight as fast as a man.
    Wow, I didn't know that about the hip angle. That explains why it's much more difficult for me to do squats with my feet straight than when my toes are angled out.
  • jimmmer
    jimmmer Posts: 3,515 Member
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    Toe placement in a squat varies from individual to individual of the same gender. Everyone has to find their particular squat style.

    As to workouts being too hard, that's also not gender-specific. You just need to ramp it back a bit until you get up to speed. Ask him to dial it down a notch.

    Bottom-line: your sessions should be tailored to your fitness level not your gender. Tell him you're struggling and get some adjustments to the routine. Don't reveal information you're uncomfortable about if you don't want.
  • DjinnMarie
    DjinnMarie Posts: 1,297 Member
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    Toe placement in a squat varies from individual to individual of the same gender. Everyone has to find their particular squat style.

    As to workouts being too hard, that's also not gender-specific. You just need to ramp it back a bit until you get up to speed. Ask him to dial it down a notch.

    Bottom-line: your sessions should be tailored to your fitness level not your gender. Tell him you're struggling and get some adjustments to the routine. Don't reveal information you're uncomfortable about if you don't want.

    +1.

    I don't see why you would need to. You can do any of the lifts a man can do. The only thing to worry about is your essential bodyfat levels. If he is trying to get you down to 10% Bf that would be a problem. The only other thing I can think of is pre and post natal conditions.

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