Trying on Clothes - Frustration

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emmaleigh47
emmaleigh47 Posts: 1,670 Member
in Motivation and Support
I have two rants about this topic

1. I dont understand how in the same store, I am apparently an 18 (yeah me), a 20 ... and yes one pair of 20s did not even fit.

2. No matter how many years I have been dating/married to my husband. I will just never understand why when it comes to trying on clothes and asking for an opinion... it almost always results in a fight.

Here is the thing... I try on this pair of capris. They are a bit tighter than my usual pants, but I think they look ok ... at least to my eyes. I show the husband who says... "do they feel tight" and then ... well they look..... ok" Now from that verbage I am left trying to tell did he think they looked ok ...or good... or do they look tight. And we have this same problem every dang time this happens. I try not to be sensitive, but seriously how can he be so dumb. Why can he just say, they look good... or ... not my favorite .... and yes I am sorry to the men out there if I am picking on you ... and yes I know I should just stop asking for him opinion..... and yes I know I am sensitive...

And yes... I am now drowning my frustration in a cookie... grr

Replies

  • princessmedic
    princessmedic Posts: 92
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    I always shop with my best friend...she will definitely tell me the truth and won't let me buy something awful.
  • JMun
    JMun Posts: 409
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    oh noes :grumble:

    You need to stop shopping with him. Save your sanity... leave him at home.

    It totally sucks that you're not digging the clothes.. I was a size 24 (yes me) not too long ago. Now I'm a snug 16... and when I say snug I mean muffin top. But I feel fabulous anyways!

    now put the cookie down.... step away from the cookie...
  • baby81girl2003
    baby81girl2003 Posts: 79 Member
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    Men are not wired like we are. You can't hold it against him. Yes he obviously thought they were tight or he wouldn't of said that. He was trying to be sensitive to you. Kudos to him be being "nice" but not straight forward. Sit him down and tell him, it's fine to be honest with you even if the truth sucks sometimes. If you can BOTH follow through ( him being straight forward and you not punishing him for it) then it will avoid the fights in th future. Best of luck!

    And yes, clothing sizes are insane! I never know what size I will need.
  • jmmtaylor
    jmmtaylor Posts: 225
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    My problem is my husband says EVERYTHING looks good. I never get a different answer. "Babe do I look ok in this?" "Yeah baby girl it looks good" or "Do you think this will work together" "Looks good baby girl"

    Ugh. Drives me insane! I would like and honest opinion please. Tell me I look like a lunatic in that, or that it just doesn't go right, or that I look terrible! Half the time I wear it and still feel self conscious in it.
  • liscar
    liscar Posts: 311 Member
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    I have two rants about this topic

    1. I dont understand how in the same store, I am apparently an 18 (yeah me), a 20 ... and yes one pair of 20s did not even fit.

    2. No matter how many years I have been dating/married to my husband. I will just never understand why when it comes to trying on clothes and asking for an opinion... it almost always results in a fight.

    Here is the thing... I try on this pair of capris. They are a bit tighter than my usual pants, but I think they look ok ... at least to my eyes. I show the husband who says... "do they feel tight" and then ... well they look..... ok" Now from that verbage I am left trying to tell did he think they looked ok ...or good... or do they look tight. And we have this same problem every dang time this happens. I try not to be sensitive, but seriously how can he be so dumb. Why can he just say, they look good... or ... not my favorite .... and yes I am sorry to the men out there if I am picking on you ... and yes I know I should just stop asking for him opinion..... and yes I know I am sensitive...

    And yes... I am now drowning my frustration in a cookie... grr
    Don't ask the husband.....not a good idea.....mine always says "I'm not answering that" doesn't matter what they look like. Best friends are the way to go. And just have ONE cookie :)
  • TheNewDanielle
    TheNewDanielle Posts: 87
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    If he always does the same thing, don't go with him. It'll only cause problems. My bf is sent away to the men's department until we get home. Then I try it on and say "too bad" haha. Gotta find a different solution than drowning in a cookie... make him eat the cookie lol
  • KeepOnMoving
    KeepOnMoving Posts: 383 Member
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    I can totally relate to trying on clothes at a store and having same size, same brand, but fit so weird and different. I don't know how people order from a catelog without trying it on first.

    As far as my husband's opinion is concern, I could care less. This is not about him anymore, but me. He actually likes how I look now since I am very close to were I was on my wedding day. Got maybe 5-6 pounds to loose to get were I was when we were dating. But when I was heavier, he made comments about me being too big and it use to make me mad. But I really can care less. Because if he loves me for me, he would stay. And he needs to take a good hard look at himself in a mirror. But anyway, I am making myself happy by doing what I want, when I want - which is loose weight by eating healthy and exercising daily.

    So put down that cookie. Don't let some male guy give you an excuse to make your pants fit tighter. Let him eat those cookies why you fit into your swim suit. U go girl!
  • fitnesspirateninja
    fitnesspirateninja Posts: 667 Member
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    Okay, you are either going to have to tell him EXACTLY what you need him to say (seriously, exactly), or not go shopping with him. He probably isn't intentionally trying to frustrate you, but he obviously doesn't know / isn't able to tell you what you need to hear. My guess is he's trying, but failing.
  • emmaleigh47
    emmaleigh47 Posts: 1,670 Member
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    Haha at "make him eat the cookie" and yes I stopped at one cookie.

    I guess the thing that drives me nuts ... is he asks if the pants are tight and then later he tries to say he was just asking, like he didnt think they looked tight -- ok if you think they look fine, why ASK if they are tight. OMG ... that man is going to drive me to drink.
    And I am very sensitive about clothes, especially shorts/caris and summer clothes...

    Ok now I dont know what to do ... just upset... and I leave in 72hours!
  • jkestens63
    jkestens63 Posts: 1,164 Member
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    Glad you stopped at one. Just think about it for a moment - did having that cookie solve the Problem? Don't shop with the man and whatever disagreement you have its probably not caused by food so food won't solve it. Stay strong!!!!!!
  • grizzlysister
    grizzlysister Posts: 2
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    I agree with these gals - take a girl buddy with you instead to help you choose clothes.....

    Not that I'm trying to salute his non-committal opinion, but maybe he just doesn't want to make you feel bad with whatever he might say.....hetro men are best left to decide on which wrench to use, or how to repair a lawnmower. They aren't good with rating fashion and even less comfortable with telling thier spouses or girlfriends something objective like 'what or how to wear it.' They would just rather you didn't wear clothes.....(.- I know you are laughing now :-))

    Dress for yourself, and you might find a significant difference in his attitude.....

    "Doubt whom you will, but never yourself."
    - Christian Bovee

    Hugs,,,,,and drop that cookie!!
  • antipholous
    antipholous Posts: 116
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    Are you buying jeans vs. dress pants? I'm 2 sizes bigger in dress clothes than I am casual wear. Not sure if I'm stating an obviously known fact or not...(or if it even applies to womens' wear.)
  • MegJo
    MegJo Posts: 398 Member
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    Men... oh men, they just don't know....anything :laugh: Especially when it comes to clothes. I had some jeans that I use to fit into waaaay back when... I tried them on and I thought, okay, snug - yes, but doable. I was hoping they'd stretch out in a bit as the day went on. I asked my boyfriend how I looked and he said, "oh, those will look good when you're skinny"....long pause, then he saw my facial expression turning into the hulk :mad: and added "skinny-er then you are now, hunny". Riiiiight.

    But as for the clothes -- you're running a half- marathon you are AWESOME:happy: ! I'd pick clothes that feel good to you. Summer clothes suck. I've NEVER enjoyed trying to find stuff that fits but just remember you're in the middle of this weight loss journey and probably by the summer the clothes you buy for Miami won't even fit!

    And WTG at stopping at one cookie, and not choosing to throw that cookie at your husband.:laugh:
  • emmaleigh47
    emmaleigh47 Posts: 1,670 Member
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    Men... oh men, they just don't know....anything :laugh: Especially when it comes to clothes. I had some jeans that I use to fit into waaaay back when... I tried them on and I thought, okay, snug - yes, but doable. I was hoping they'd stretch out in a bit as the day went on. I asked my boyfriend how I looked and he said, "oh, those will look good when you're skinny"....long pause, then he saw my facial expression turning into the hulk :mad: and added "skinny-er then you are now, hunny". Riiiiight.

    But as for the clothes -- you're running a half- marathon you are AWESOME:happy: ! I'd pick clothes that feel good to you. Summer clothes suck. I've NEVER enjoyed trying to find stuff that fits but just remember you're in the middle of this weight loss journey and probably by the summer the clothes you buy for Miami won't even fit!

    And WTG at stopping at one cookie, and not choosing to throw that cookie at your husband.:laugh:

    And that post dear... is why I love you!
    Good point... I guess I will just wear what is comfortable what I think looks good.
    I think my problem is I am sooo used to my clothes being baggy (I havent bought new work clothes yet since I started losing weight) that I am not used to normal sized clothes. LOL!
  • MegJo
    MegJo Posts: 398 Member
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    I think my problem is I am sooo used to my clothes being baggy (I havent bought new work clothes yet since I started losing weight) that I am not used to normal sized clothes. LOL!

    I hear ya!!!! I went to buy some new workout clothes ( I use to have only one "outfit", but now that I'm actually working out more than once a month :laugh: I needed more!!!) I couldn't help but look for some cheap jeans to buy as well..... lets just say I didn't walk away with any. All this hard work since september, I just don't know why the size 2s didn't fit :laugh: (Well, they fit around my calf!!!) I really wanted to be like 4 sizes down, but I'm not. In time....we will get there in time.... :happy:

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