Blogs

I have a question about some of the behavior I see on the blogs. (I've seen this with myself AND I've seen it with friends...so, this was not actually about anything anyone said or did on a blog to me today...just observation).

I'm not a big fan of the "People are SOOO MEA-AN" mentality and the posts that get thrown around on here.

People are people. Wether in your daily life or online, you're going to run into people who disagree with you...have different ways of sharing/receiving information...have different beliefs...whatever...Not everyone will tell you what you want to hear, but if you ask a question you are still going to get answers. That's the beauty of asking questions in a public forum...you get many different answers from many different people and you can read through to see what makes the most sense in a way of communication that speaks to you.

Blogs I feel a little differently about, though. A blog is a place where people are trying to get out THEIR feelings or thoughts on a topic...they're not necessarily asking you to tell them that they're right or wrong...they're just trying to share or use the written word as an outlet.

So, my question is this...WHY do people feel the need to go into someone's blog and either downvote it (especially on something very personal) or post hateful comments? If you don't like the emotions that someone is sharing...MOVE ON. If there is a particular blogger that you don't like their blogs...DON'T READ THEM. There is no point in taking someone's emotions (joy, sadness, grief, fear...WHATEVER) and downgrading it. Quite honestly, if they wanted your opinion it would have been a forum topic, not a blog.

And, yes, I do know that we have the choice to make our blogs private or only viewable to our friends. Honestly? I'm GLAD that most people don't do that. Maybe I don't enjoy your blog. Maybe I don't agree with your view on something. But maybe something you said was something that I needed to hear today. Maybe I something I wrote is similar to something you're dealing with and for one moment you felt less alone. So, no...to me privatizing the blog is not the answer...respecting people's emotions is the answer.

Yeah, yeah, I know...TL/dr.

So, my question is this...WHY do people feel the need to go into someone's blog and either downvote it (especially on something very personal) or post hateful comments?

I don't know the answer to that.

Yes. I agree.

I do not agree.

Regardless if it is a blog, thread, whatever...if the option to reply is there, then one should expect all types of replies.

Replies are replies, but I've seen straight up attacks in blog posts.

If you don't take the time to consider a persons's POV in your answer anywhere else on MFP, do it in the blogs.

It's like you are in somebody's home. Friendly difference of opinion leads to sparkling conversation, but the aim isn't the win you'd be going for in debate club.

As you said not everyone is going to like what you have to say. You are also not going to like what everyone else has to say. If this is something that is upsetting or hurtful to you I would suggest not sharing very personal or intimate feelings to a larger audience.

I would also ask if you are truly sharing these feelings to potentially be helpful to others or if perhaps you are mostly seeking comfort and support. If it's the latter maybe only sharing with those you are close to is the better option. If not, then it's important to remember that for the most part negative comments are going to be less common than positive support. If these few responses are affecting you more than the positive feedback, I would personally revisit whether or not my thoughts and feelings should be made available for everyone to see.

I do understand this, but it was actually something that was done on someone else's blog today that bugged me...I guess it just bothers me to think that the options are that someone either deal with negativity on something personal or I don't get to read some really amazing blogs from people that I'm not friends with. It's just kind of sad.

As you said not everyone is going to like what you have to say. You are also not going to like what everyone else has to say. If this is something that is upsetting or hurtful to you I would suggest not sharing very personal or intimate feelings to a larger audience.

I would also ask if you are truly sharing these feelings to potentially be helpful to others or if perhaps you are mostly seeking comfort and support. If it's the latter maybe only sharing with those you are close to is the better option. If not, then it's important to remember that for the most part negative comments are going to be less common than positive support. If these few responses are affecting you more than the positive feedback, I would personally revisit whether or not my thoughts and feelings should be made available for everyone to see.

I do understand this, but it was actually something that was done on someone else's blog today that bugged me...I guess it just bothers me to think that the options are that someone either deal with negativity on something personal or I don't get to read some really amazing blogs from people that I'm not friends with. It's just kind of sad.

Those aren't the only two options. The third option is to accept that there will be some negative feedback and not let it bother them.

ETA: long story short... you can only control your own actions. Getting upset over what someone else is doing or saying is exhausting and pointless.

As you said not everyone is going to like what you have to say. You are also not going to like what everyone else has to say. If this is something that is upsetting or hurtful to you I would suggest not sharing very personal or intimate feelings to a larger audience.

I would also ask if you are truly sharing these feelings to potentially be helpful to others or if perhaps you are mostly seeking comfort and support. If it's the latter maybe only sharing with those you are close to is the better option. If not, then it's important to remember that for the most part negative comments are going to be less common than positive support. If these few responses are affecting you more than the positive feedback, I would personally revisit whether or not my thoughts and feelings should be made available for everyone to see.

I do understand this, but it was actually something that was done on someone else's blog today that bugged me...I guess it just bothers me to think that the options are that someone either deal with negativity on something personal or I don't get to read some really amazing blogs from people that I'm not friends with. It's just kind of sad.

Those aren't the only two options. The third option is to accept that there will be some negative feedback and not let it bother them.

ETA: long story short... you can only control your own actions. Getting upset over what someone else is doing or saying is exhausting and pointless.

This is true too, but I think a healthy community has some discussion about boundaries. If somebody blocks the grocery aisle with their cart, you don't switch to only online ordering through Amazon and you don't go off on them. It is rude and frustrating though.

We all "know" that you don't block the aisle and people do, in fact, discuss how to handle it even though it's been in force as long as there have been carts and aisles. Do you wait? Nudge the cart out of the way? Clearly ask the person to move?

I think that the question is healthy.