Hi My name is Nick . Depressed at a morbid 350 pounds

I'll be real with you, I cannot relate to this at all. But we are all here on MFP for a reason - to lose weight and commit ourselves to healthier lives. And that we have in common

My youngest sister was killed by a drunk driver one week before her fourteenth birthday. While I'll never know if you've learnt your lesson (that's for you to decide,) I know that being depressed and being overweight is a burden, emotionally and physically.

I think if you made small, gradual changes over a long period of time you'll have more success than if you try and force yourself to dive head first into a healthy lifestyle. You're here on MFP. Track everything you eat and be brutally honest about it. Once you see your caloric intake you can go from there.

I'm hoping you can turn this around.

Welcome to MFP.

Don't try to change everything at once. Make a list of things you need/want to achieve. Be realistic, put everything down. If you have problems motivating yourself to get up, shower and brush your teeth, put that on the list. Even being able to tie your shoelaces. These are what we call NSVs Non-scale victories. Yes, they are victories, they motivate you to do a little more each day.

As someone said earlier, MFP has a LOT of people in all sorts of situations, but they are here to do something about it. You obviously want to change things, you made the enormous step of joining MFP and writing about your situation.

1. measure yourself as soon as you can, and keep track of it. If I had not done so, I would have lost my mind, because I was not seeing weight coming off, but the inches were.

2. log EVERYTHING you eat or drink.

3. There is NO such thing as a "cheat day". "Cheating" is a shortcut to a goal... you will not get to your goal by any shortcut, therefore, you are NOT "cheating"... you are lapsing. I do not have a lapse day. IF I want to eat something, I have to decide... do I want that particular thing, and allow for it in my daily allowance. I am not saying you have to deprive yourself, but at you need to evaluate things.

4. Don't just go for hundreds of MFP friends.. quality over quantity... support each other. Don't expect support and not give it.

5. Remember.. despite how accurate your bathroom scales are.. THEY LIE!

6. Use measuring cups and kitchen scales. Your idea of a serving, is probably more than it should be.

7. Keep active! even if it is a few steps more than the day before. you are not competing with anyone else, just trying to better your activity the day before.

8. Do DRINK THE WATER! It really does make a difference.

9. Make small changes at first...and add more changes. They will become habits. Believe me. It takes 21 days to change a habit!

10. Remember... you have choices. How badly do you WANT it? NO EXCUSES! To quote Yoda "Do or do not, there is no try".
Believe in yourself, you are stronger than you think.
Just imagine how you can look by this time next year.

I wish you all the very best on your journey to a healthier happier you.

If you want inspiration, look here : http://www.myfitnesspal.com/profile/lukewind

Hello people who may read this, I'm thirty five years old, five foot seven and weigh three hundred and fifty pounds. I Lost everything due to drunk driving . Lost house all my savings and a lot of fake friends. (can't party? why come over or hang out..) Was a really busy person with a lot of hustle, loosing everything killed that. I had to move in with my parents at thirty, after being on my own since I bought a house at nineteen was hard to deal with mentally. Woman I was dating left me. Some people would turn back to drinking or to drugs and get junked out. Not me! I was on probation for 3 years drinking ruined my life I hate it and jail is horrible. With no friends and anyone I ever knew a hour or so away I began to sleep and eat a lot. Now thirty five I'm on my own again. (sorta) I got a really cheap tiny repossessed house. In a area close to where I grew up hoping to see some friends again .parents still help me out a lot. I'm very grateful for my family at 350 pounds I'm morbidly obese and majorly depressed and alone. I find I sleep 12 to 15 hours a day. Cant get up to properly take care of myself . And I just had enough I want a Normal life back along with friends and new relationships and get ride of this anxiety that keeps me immobile. Idk why I wrote this, Soemthing to do trying to reach out to the world threw a box. Be cool if anyone felt like chatting with me, If there bored or such no reason needed. No need for, You can do it! comments or a pity party just normal friendly conversation be awesome. I'm 100% confident I am going to change the life God gave me im so grateful for. No more wasting Time. thanks

Bro let me say this, I know some of the things you went through and experiencing. I will not go into this here cause this is not a forum for me to spill it but I will help you out in this journey.
1) change your profile that reflects accurate information that will help motivate you every time you read it. BE POSITIVE
2) get a mindset that no matter what steps in front of me I can achieve and overcome.
3) Pick motivators that will inspire you and not inhibit you. Think of positive people you look up to.
4) track everything for the first two weeks and then make small changes that your body and you can handle.
5) stay away from Fast Foods. (No matter what people may say some people loose on it and others wont.) Studies are linked to issues with thought process and everything you listed.
6) research foods and research habits.
7) Build your database of knowledge.
8) Enlist positive friends that inspire you.
9) Never say I cant do it. With dedication and motivation anyone can achieve anything with practice and work.
10) This is the last one, Dont ever give up on a dream you have for yourself and drive forward and achieve success.
Help start you on your journey
http://authoritynutrition.com/how-many-calories-per-day/

Reaching out is the first step in helping yourself out of the dark place. I am older than you, married with kids, so I don't experience the lonely times. I have the guilt of knowing that I need to lose this weight for my family. Even though we have slightly different struggles, we are on similar journeys. I am happy to talk if you want.

Hey Nick,

Welcome to MFP. You have served your time for your bad choice, now it's time to start moving in a more positive direction.

The basics: Log everything, be honest with yourself, be as accurate as possible. Be patient, don't try to be perfect. Be consistent.

Here's some good information to help you out, take some time to read over the links

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1234699-logging-accurately-step-by-step-guide?hl=logging+step+guide

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1235566-so-you-re-new-here?hl=so+you're+new+here

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

Good luck to you

Nickwilly,

I've been where you are [not the specifics, but the statistics]. In fact, I waited until I was 397 and many years older to do something. The good news, is you are younger and smaller! I'm down 101lbs so far. I look forward to seeing your ticker hit this mark! This whole trip has been about learning wellness, caring for myself, good eating habits, and quite frankly getting my life right with God. I'm certainly not perfect, and won't pretend I am, nor judge anyone else who isn't.

We're all on a journey. Happy to help each other along and celebrate what matters to you. I hope to see you begin to move in that direction. Just reaching out here, is a step in that direction. I hope you will come back and invest in yourself and others here. Pretty soon, you will be motivating others who were in the pit we were in.

The past is behind you, and the future is yours to take. You should take it a day at a time and use this community as a guide to continue to stay on the right track.

Hi Nick, my name is Lisa feel free to add mom on daily trying to lose my last 27 pounds

Hi Nick,

I am a sober alcoholic. Even though I never got caught drunk driving in my past or caused any harm thank God, it could have happened if I hadn't stopped drinking. I have been sober 15 years next month. I went through depression when I quit drinking and got lots of assistance through AA. I gained a lot of weight and was up to 245 pounds. It took me about five years to get going and lost 100 pounds about eight years ago. I have joined MFP because I have gained back 30 and don't want to end up back where I was. I'm not sure if you are on any meds for depression but I know that what worked for me was to start moving. I started out walking and as time went on began interval training. I felt incredible and my body was transformed. I quit working out about two years ago and started back on the sugar. It put me back into a low level depression but I have come out of it now. I have cut out the sugar once again and try to stay from away from white flour, rice, pasta, potatoes, etc. I do have whole wheat products on occasion and also eat protein, full-fat cheese but in moderation, nuts, veggies, and berries. I know from experience that getting moving is difficult when you are depressed because all you want to do is sleep. I had to force myself to get moving. Start with a short walk even if it is just 15 minutes and then work your way up to longer and eventually more vigorous exercise. Also high sugar intake makes depression even worse.

I'm rooting for you!!! Karyn

Hey Nick!

I have to say i have a pretty similair story to yours, although mine is more pathetic in some ways, while yours is worse in others.

I was also a drunk driver. There's no excuse for it. All we can do is appologize and move forward. MIne cost me 10 grand and got me a criminal record. Also had the blow tube on my car for a year. I do not mean to complain, or belittle anyone's experience who has been victimized by drunk driving, I just want to show Nick that i know at least a little bit about what he has experienced. Girl friend left, found out who my real friends were, live with my parents, check check check.

if your really sleeping 15 hrs every day, there's little doubt that your clinically depressed. i often have trouble putting one foot in front of the other, but i can get out of bed.

i experience a lot of anxiety as well. Exercise helps a great deal with this. If your not used to it, it might just seem like stress, but once you get more comfortable with the idea, you'll recognize how much stress is relieved when you finish.

I've watched 'my 600 lbs life' a lot. its a show about gastric bypass surgery. some succeed, some fail. the ones that lose the weight end up discovering something about themselves that was driving them to basically self medicate with food. the ones that fall usually don't do any soul searching and end up making excuses. It sounds like you already know the things that you need to fix and are actively working on them. so i have high hopes for you to do very, very well.

good luck.

Nick, I came back to see if anyone has replied to your post ,and so glad they did.......again, Im glad , even though you did get stopped, at least you didn't maim or kill someone......I don't think I could live with myself killing some one while driving, whether its drinking or texting...........I am glad you have some solutions that people have offered......add me if you would like, I can support you as well

I always count my blessings, it helps because others can be in worse shape..........Best wishes, Lloyd

I am really hoping that you have access to a doctor.You might look into getting evaluated for anxiety and depression.

I am close to someone who has struggled with anxiety and depression for years. It sounds like your problems are deeper than being weight-related. And while you might not have money for therapy right now, do think about reaching out to a counseller, chaplain, parent, etc.

Unusual fatigue, feelings of social isolation, lack of motivation to do basic care -- these are all symptoms.

Dieting and adding physical activity will help you feel better. But you might need more help than that - and there is no shame in seeking it.

I also dealt with severe anxiety for several years and have found doing at fifteen minutes of exercise will calm the anxiety and then I want to exercise longer. Exercise really helps me to channel my stress and feel much better. I am beginning a weight loss journey myself and trying to learn to love myself again, by paying attention to what I eat, exercising, and being less critical myself. I may not be in top shape, but my body is still powerful enough to heal itself and feel better and I need to appreciate that.