Want Friends who are survivors not victims

I first joined MFP over a year ago but gave it up after a couple of weeks. I kept running into people who were so busy complaining about all the people who made them unhealthy that those who faced life the way I do seemed to be hidden. So, I took time to straighten out other areas in my life. Now, I'm back with the full intention of losing 120 lbs by the end of 2015. When it comes to the past I've "been there/done that" when it comes to the bad marriage, the emotional abuse and so on. They are the past and I've let go of it. What is left are the habits I let myself form that have kept me obese even after my divorce. In a nutshell, I'm looking for friends who want to be accountable and are willing to keep me accountable as I break these habits. I do this not just for me but for my children. I'm a single mom ready to face the future healthy and happy.

Replies

  • paulawatkins1974
    paulawatkins1974 Posts: 720 Member
    Hi. I started out with 121 lbs to lose. 80 to go. I get the abusive Marriage/single parent thing. Did all that. Have started out fresh with a new marriage and a preschooler (with grandkids the same age!) Congrats for trying to get back on track. You can do this.
  • RET68
    RET68 Posts: 88
    Sixty-six weeks, that should be doable if you stick with it. Good luck. I'm really just here to discuss health and fitness, not hold people accountable. But, you should find lots of people who enjoy the "tough love" approach. The place seems to be crawling with them. I wish you the best. :flowerforyou:
  • I am starting fitness and new meals, and know I can do it, but bad habits die hard, and new ideas take time to form and execute.
  • violasmith85
    violasmith85 Posts: 274 Member
    I've got a severely autistic non verbal son, lost my daughter to a rare condition, live with stress and yes I've had a bad marriage before too. I refuse to use any of it as an excuse not to get healthy. I'm determined to be around for a lot of years to take care of my son and I won't let him down. No excuses!
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    I just moved 4000 miles to get out of a loveless marriage... got two kids so just getting the hang of the lone mother thing. I'm not into ranting about family/interpersonal problems on my newsfeed, I just get on with stuff. Usually I lift weights but I currently don't have access to a gym or my own barbell... that's going to change when my situation's a bit more financially stable, so in the meantime I've been doing push-up/pistol squat variations for strength training, and walking everywhere because I don't have a car (a lot of it uphill because where I live is very hilly). I've been maintaining my weight for a while in between cutting/bulking cycles, although I gained too much after my last bulk (my bad).... I don't currently own a scales but I think the weight is coming off based on how my clothes fit. (that's on my list of things to buy after I take care of all the basic furniture/household stuff, because I had to leave most of that kind of thing behind).

    Anyway, I'm happy and enjoying my new job and glad to be out of a train wreck of a situation. And where I live is very convenient as I can walk to work, the kids school (2-3 min walk from my work) and the town centre easily, and there are buses and trains to nearby towns. The other stuff (like the lack of furniture lol) will take care of itself as I go along. :drinker:
  • I have a goal of 80 pounds in 9 months. I have lost 14 so far.
    I agree if it's important you will find a way if it's not you will find an excuse
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,603 Member
    You didn't quit because other people were acting like victims. You quit because you weren't ready to do the hard work of losing.

    Own that, if you don't want to play the victim.
  • Basilin
    Basilin Posts: 360 Member
    Kudos to everyone dealing with personal struggles that are so harsh, who are ready to take control of their lives despite it. These stories are inspiring.
  • lovemycar2012
    lovemycar2012 Posts: 6 Member
    You go girl! Forget the problems that were in your past and just keep moving forward. If you continue to talk about yesterday than you are not truly leaving the past behind. Look toward tomorrow to reach your goals. You can do it, we all can do it. We just have to want it bad enough.