Completely Overwhelmed
oboeing
Posts: 1,816 Member
I am in desperate need of some advice on how to make this program work for me....
I'm 35 years old, and need to lose 30 pounds. I've lost 16 so far, but am slowly putting it back on. My problem? My life.
My story...I wake up at 430 am. I work my full time job Monday-Friday, from 6 am to 3 pm. Wednesday-Friday, I then immediately head to my second job and work from 330-8 pm, and work the part time job again on Saturdays from 1030 am - 530 pm. This is a total of 60 hours a week. Quitting my second job is not an option, and, based on what I need in my life, it looks like I'll be here another 2 years. I have spent the past 2.5 years working my way out of debt, and at the end of my 3rd year at my second job, I will be pretty much debt free (aside from my mortgage). I am single, and everything I need must be done by myself. I have a roommate, which helps bring in some extra cash as well. My house will need major improvements over the next few years. It needs to be renovated (esp the bathroom which I think may have a mold issue), the carpets need replacing, and I will need a new roof. If I stay at the second job for another year, I will be able to save up enough money to do all this. Next, my full time job has no room for growth. I will never be management, I will always be pigeonholed into working as a phone programmer on a help desk. The worst part? I hate my job. I have no interest in it, and I hate getting up and going to work in the morning. So, if I stay at my part time job another year, I will be able to save up enough money to go get my masters in a field that I'm passionate about, and will be able to walk away from hating my job. My full time job pays the mortgage and all my regular house related bills, but doesn't leave much extra money, and certainly not enough to sock away $50,000 over 2 years like I can do if I stay at my second job.
Here's my problem. I know I need to work out. But honestly, after working 16 hour days, and getting home at 830 pm, if i work out after, then I don't get to bed until 11, and then I only get 5 hours of sleep. I've tried this, and I can't make it stick more than a week at a time without being exhausted. Add to that the fact that I am a stress eater... Even keeping up with my eating seems exhausting. I do well for a week, and then I just blow it because I end up being too tired to care. (it seems relevant to add that i have sleep apnea and even with my cpap I don't sleep well). My one day off a week is Sundays, and I spend those doing laundry, cleaning the house, grocery shopping, and everything else that I need to fit in for the week. I am overwhelmed by my life, and by trying to figure out how to make this all work.
There is no option of selling my townhouse, because I live just south of DC, and even renting a 1 bedroom apartment would be more than my mortgage, and it is the one thing I feel like I can call mine. There are reasons and goals I have to working the two jobs, and they will make things better for me in the long run. But.... in the meantime, I can't seem to get on top of taking care of myself.
I need help. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks.
I'm 35 years old, and need to lose 30 pounds. I've lost 16 so far, but am slowly putting it back on. My problem? My life.
My story...I wake up at 430 am. I work my full time job Monday-Friday, from 6 am to 3 pm. Wednesday-Friday, I then immediately head to my second job and work from 330-8 pm, and work the part time job again on Saturdays from 1030 am - 530 pm. This is a total of 60 hours a week. Quitting my second job is not an option, and, based on what I need in my life, it looks like I'll be here another 2 years. I have spent the past 2.5 years working my way out of debt, and at the end of my 3rd year at my second job, I will be pretty much debt free (aside from my mortgage). I am single, and everything I need must be done by myself. I have a roommate, which helps bring in some extra cash as well. My house will need major improvements over the next few years. It needs to be renovated (esp the bathroom which I think may have a mold issue), the carpets need replacing, and I will need a new roof. If I stay at the second job for another year, I will be able to save up enough money to do all this. Next, my full time job has no room for growth. I will never be management, I will always be pigeonholed into working as a phone programmer on a help desk. The worst part? I hate my job. I have no interest in it, and I hate getting up and going to work in the morning. So, if I stay at my part time job another year, I will be able to save up enough money to go get my masters in a field that I'm passionate about, and will be able to walk away from hating my job. My full time job pays the mortgage and all my regular house related bills, but doesn't leave much extra money, and certainly not enough to sock away $50,000 over 2 years like I can do if I stay at my second job.
Here's my problem. I know I need to work out. But honestly, after working 16 hour days, and getting home at 830 pm, if i work out after, then I don't get to bed until 11, and then I only get 5 hours of sleep. I've tried this, and I can't make it stick more than a week at a time without being exhausted. Add to that the fact that I am a stress eater... Even keeping up with my eating seems exhausting. I do well for a week, and then I just blow it because I end up being too tired to care. (it seems relevant to add that i have sleep apnea and even with my cpap I don't sleep well). My one day off a week is Sundays, and I spend those doing laundry, cleaning the house, grocery shopping, and everything else that I need to fit in for the week. I am overwhelmed by my life, and by trying to figure out how to make this all work.
There is no option of selling my townhouse, because I live just south of DC, and even renting a 1 bedroom apartment would be more than my mortgage, and it is the one thing I feel like I can call mine. There are reasons and goals I have to working the two jobs, and they will make things better for me in the long run. But.... in the meantime, I can't seem to get on top of taking care of myself.
I need help. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks.
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Replies
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You need to program myfitnesspal for a 1200 calorie diet. No excuses. If I can do it, you can do it. As for your financial situation, I have ways to save money when money could not be saved. If you want help in that area, add me as a friend and I can give you some tips. You'd be surprised.0
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It sounds to me as though you've made clearing your debt your absolute priority. If you want to be debt-free in a relatively short amount of time, then there will be sacrifices.
An alternative would be having a five- or ten-year plan instead of a two-year plan. This would bring some balance to finance, health, relationships, leisure activities, education etc.0 -
The debt I'm paying off is from when I was married. I have been divorced for 8 years, and am still paying off the debts. I was paying minimums for so long, and just got tired of having it. That's why it's been a priority. It took me 10 years to pay it off. I don't ever want to go through that again. Having that much debt is another stress I'm just trying to let go of...0
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You dont need to work out to lose weight, sounds like ur job keeps u busy/active enough that u dont need the extra deficit. Just have your eating on point and youll see results
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Is there a possibility of you walking/running or biking from one job to the second? What distance is between the two?0
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I don't want to be mean, but it sounds like you're making excuses for not making healthy choices. I've been in the same boat before.
I work a lot of 50+ hour weeks, but I always make sure that I pack my own lunch and keep healthy snacks at my desk/in my purse for those times when I REALLY need a pick-me-up.
Invest in individual portion sized tupperware. When you have your Sunday off, make yourself a big batch of rice and beans, pre-portion yourself some salads and quick samiches, and plan your meals for the week. Get a high-quality, larger-sized thermal lunch box, buy some re-usable ice packs from Wal-Mart, and pack your lunch every single day for both jobs. The ice packs will keep your food refrigerator-cold all day as long as you have a quality thermal pack.
When you go grocery shopping, don't buy the foods that you'll binge on. Make healthy choices, and make no excuses. Your home repairs, your job, your savings, and your future plans mean nothing if you're not healthy and happy.
You can do it!0 -
For what it's worth I think it's great that you have a plan for sorting out your finances and your house and I think you're absolutely right to make thaty your focus because once that's done a massive weight will be lifted from your shoulders and you'll have the time and energy to focus on yourself.
For now I'd focus on your calorie intake rather than the exercise. You don't need to exercise to lose weight, and maybe if you get the right foods into you, at the right calorie level you might summon some extra energy for working out.0 -
Is there a possibility of you walking/running or biking from one job to the second? What distance is between the two?
it's 20 miles if i take I-95, way more if I take back roads, and I only have a 30 minute window to make it there...0 -
If your goal is just weight loss the solution is your diet.
You sound busy, and this can lead to eating fast food or snacking on more than you intend to. Set your cal goal and pre plan and prep your week. This way you don't have to think, just eat what you have prepped and planned!0 -
Invest in individual portion sized tupperware. When you have your Sunday off, make yourself a big batch of rice and beans, pre-portion yourself some salads and quick samiches, and plan your meals for the week. Get a high-quality, larger-sized thermal lunch box, buy some re-usable ice packs from Wal-Mart, and pack your lunch every single day for both jobs. The ice packs will keep your food refrigerator-cold all day as long as you have a quality thermal pack.
i actually have this, and cook 3 crock pots once a month, so my dinners are pre-portioned. I do make excuses for me eating poorly, there is no 2 ways around that. I do just need to suck it up and do it, you're absolutely right on that...0 -
I really commend you for working so hard to get out of debt. You don't *need* to exercise to lose weight. Exercise has additional benefits (and also it's awesome) but all you need for weight loss is a calorie deficit.
I would recommend starting with these links: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants and http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/819055-setting-your-calorie-and-macro-targets
My advice to you is to make weight loss as easy as possible. Set a reasonable calorie goal (1200 is not reasonable for your circumstances, trust me) and take your time. It's not a race and in my eyes losing slowly is better than gaining or even staying the same. Good luck OP :flowerforyou:0 -
By the way, re the debt situation if you have some time have a look at www.moneysavingexpert.com. It's a UK site and I'm not sure how well a lot of the advice will translate for the US, but it's taught me loads over the last few years and I've managed to save myself quite a bit of money. Might be something there for you?0
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There's an app called "7 minute workout", it's interval training with a different workout everyday.0
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I really commend you for working so hard to get out of debt. You don't *need* to exercise to lose weight. Exercise has additional benefits (and also it's awesome) but all you need for weight loss is a calorie deficit.
I would recommend starting with these links: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants and http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/819055-setting-your-calorie-and-macro-targets
My advice to you is to make weight loss as easy as possible. Set a reasonable calorie goal (1200 is not reasonable for your circumstances, trust me) and take your time. It's not a race and in my eyes losing slowly is better than gaining or even staying the same. Good luck OP :flowerforyou:
This! The calories you eat are what will make you lose/gain.
When you have a little more time or can change your schedual, you can add excersize etc.0 -
You don't need to exercise to lost weight. Focus on keep your diet where it needs to be. Maybe invest in a step tracker (I use Jawbone's UP) and try to get more activity that way (e.g., walking a little extra each day) to make sure you're not completely sedentary.
Also, it sounds like you're under a lot of stress. Life is short. Really, really short. Try to make YOU happy. Everything else will fall into place.0 -
Eat more ready meals. I.E. pre-cut veggies and fruit, smoothies, protein shakes, and salads. These cut time...and in the long run save money because you're not throwing out groceries you never cooked. Remember you lose weight in the kitchen & get fit in the gym. You need your sleep. Best wishes.0
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After a hail or wind storm see if insurance will cover the roof. That will help with length of time in the part time job. Hugs Chica0
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hahaha Harvo... if i wait for one of those, it will end up being waaaaaay too late on the roof...0
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i just want to say thank you to everyone for all of your input!!! i spent a lot of time thinking on saturday, and here's what i've come up with...
1. eating. must get it under control. period. no more excuses. to this affect, i made 3 healthy meals this weekend, portioned them, and froze them. i also cut a cantaloupe and portioned it, portioned my hummus for each day this week, and wrote up a menu. tomorrow i'll be making my salads for the week.
2. working out: i think i'm going to have to give the Insanity a break, because as much as I like what it's doing for me strength wise, i just don't have the energy to stick with it every day after working for 14 hours, and truthfully, it's exhausting me. so... i've decided to try to get back doing my couch to 5K on days when i don't work both jobs, and on days that i do work both, it's the 7 minute workout. something is better than nothing, and i can certainly manage 7 minutes a day.
3. stress... well.... that one i've still gotta figure out....but that's a long road...
again, thank you so much for all your input!!!!0 -
I'm glad you read you've made a good plan!
Re: exercising, on the days you work both jobs to just try to be more active during the day. Sound like you might have a job where you're chained to your desk but try to get up and move around as much as you can. On your breaks, walk around, take the stairs. Park further away if you can. Things like that.
I like that you're going to get back into C25k but make sure you have an alternate plan for rainy or cold days. Either do Insanity on those days or find videos online or have other references handy for your own homemade workout.
Best of luck on both this and your saving and debt reduction! That is not an easy thing to do!0 -
i work at a firehouse, so they've got gyms there, so i've got a backup treadmill for those rainy days that i can hit on my way home! you're right about the being chained to a desk, and i get away as often as i can, but it's not nearly often enough.... however, my parking garage is a block away!0
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All smart comments here. If I could add one thing - don't compromise your sleep/rest time for the sake of exercise! Sleep apnea is a serious problem but it may sort it self out with weight loss. All the best to you!0
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That's rough. Definitely use myfitnesspal calorie goal and try very hard to stick to it.0
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You need to program myfitnesspal for a 1200 calorie diet. No excuses. If I can do it, you can do it. As for your financial situation, I have ways to save money when money could not be saved. If you want help in that area, add me as a friend and I can give you some tips. You'd be surprised.
I'd love some tips to save money!!0 -
You dont need to work out to lose weight, sounds like ur job keeps u busy/active enough that u dont need the extra deficit. Just have your eating on point and youll see results
I agree with this ^^^^^ You do not have to have a 'work out programme' to lose weight and to be healthy. Get your eating right - your life is busy so eat as healthily as you can and don't go too low calorie - just stick to good food in sensible portions and be sensible as far as treats etc. If you want to exercise try and build a little into your normal routines so you are moving a little more. You can do this without turning it into a 3rd job. I try and make my housework as active as possible - it's got to be done anyway so I just do it with attitude!
Good luck to you - you sure do have a lot on your plate but you have a plan which, in time, will lead to a happier you.0 -
Sounds to me like you've got it all figured out, for the most part. With the exception of your weight. I'd advise you to cut calories where you can. Instead of mayo, have mustard. If you have to have bread, have wheat instead of white. Brown rice instead of white. Little changes, that you'll barley notice, if at all, will make a big difference. Also try parking farther from any entrance, even if it's just a few spaces. On Sundays, even though your busy enough squeeze something extra in, maybe hand wash your car. Or clean the outside of the windows of the house. Every little bit helps!0
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Hi, I agree with everyone's comments about getting the calories down and making them count....you also might want to go to Target or Wal-Mart or order online a Leslie Sansone walk video. It sounds silly, but even if you just do 1-2 miles in your living room, it will only take 24-30 minutes tops to do 2 miles, and you will not have to go to a gym, brush your teeth or even get dressed to do it. It will get you moving and you could do it as soon as you get home from the jobs or wake up 1/2 hour earlier. It will help. And I commend you for your debt plan....stick to it, you want to get out of debt as quickly as possible.0
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I understand your motivations for clearing your debt, but it's no good being debt free and suffering a nervous breakdown. Everything is balance.
I agree with the comment about lengthening the time you take to clear your debts. People need a couple of days off every week to stay healthy.0 -
HIIT...HIgh Intensity Interval Training You can do a great workout in less time at Home. I love to use Fitness Blenders on Youtube. It has great no equipment interval training in the time that you have alloted for a workout. HIIT gives you more intensity in a short time frame.
I have 4 kids,a crazy schedule with them in every activity possible and a full time job. I feel you on that divorce dept also. Just be sure you workout!!! Youtube is there whenever you are available. You can also make up a workout by using 45 sec work and 15 sec rest intervals. I have a cool HIIT timer App on my tablet that I use at home and for my Boot Camp classes.
Example:
45 sec Jumping Jacks
15 sec Active Rest March in Place
45 sec High Knees
15 sec Active Rest Lunges etc......
Another great at home workout I learned in the Army is what we called "52 Card Pick up".
Use a deck of playing cards. Designate each suite as an exercise and do the number that is on the card.
Example:
Diamonds-Push Ups
Hearts-Squats
Spades-Jumping Jacks
Clubs-Lunges
Face cards are 10
Aces are 11
Hope this helps 0
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