New Start - Need Friends - Curves

MiirandaC
MiirandaC Posts: 14 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hello,

I have done this weight struggle for most of my life. Unfortunately it hasn't been an up and down struggle, but mainly just an up, up, up struggle. Over the years I have tried so many fad diets, HCG, weight watchers, all of it. But in the end, I have never been able to stick with it, and quickly gain back every thing I had lost, and then some. Lately, I have been feeling more and more depressed, hateful, and withdrawn. I limit myself in day to day activities just because I'm afraid of how I look while doing it. I have troubles making friends, and I'm sure that is because I am so withdrawn, and so convinced that everyone is looking at me with pure judgement. I look at myself this way, so why wouldn't everyone else? The gym has never really been an option for me because of this as well. I'm scared to go, I'm scared to be judged, etc. I have gone a few times over the years, though it never lasted long, because on both occasions, my partner up and quit on me. I have a few overweight friends, but none of them are driven enough to do anything about it. They are comfortable with themselves and just say that one day they will get weight loss surgery.

I am not willing to wait. I've told myself before that I may as well accept that this is who I am going to be, what I am going to be. but I refuse. I have been living in this cage of a body for far too long. Finally, I was able to convince my mother to go with me and we had our consultation at Curves today.All this time I knew how much i weighed, but going in there today and having someone take all my measurements, weight, and BMI it really put things into perspective for me. First off, having to say out loud that I want to lose 100 pounds really struck a cord. Secondly, hearing that woman say I was "morbidly obese" nearly killed me. I had to fight back the tears, and both her and my mother could see that. It hurt, and left me feeling very depressed, but at the same time it left me feeling motivated. More motivated than I have been in years.

We start Monday. We are both going to be doing the Curves Complete. For me, I know the biggest part is what I eat, and why I eat. I definitely am an emotional eater. I get on myself about my appearance, and then a few minutes later I find myself staring in the pantry. I have a bad day, I have a bad meal. Curves Complete they give you a weekly meal plan, and you meet with a coach every week. I feel this is exactly what I need.

I am excited to start this weight loss journey, and so thankful to have my moms support in this. I'm also glad I found this forum, and I hope to meet some people on here who are also embarking on the same journey as I am and that I can turn to for support - just some people to talk to when I'm having a hard day of it and feeling like quitting.. I know I am going to need all the support I can get with this as my real, close friends do not have the same goals as me. If I've said it once, I've said it 100 times, but I really, truly feel ready, and inspired, to find the REAL me hiding deep, deep down in this shell of a body.


The Light Can Only Shine Through Broken Vessels.

Replies

  • krysstah
    krysstah Posts: 6 Member
    Good for you for taking the first step! I just started this journey yesterday and am looking for some online friends for support as well...feel free to friend me!
  • hearthwood
    hearthwood Posts: 794 Member
    Weight loss surgery!! Your friends just want to continue their bad eating habits while packing on the pounds, then they'll decide when they want weight loss surgery. Unbelievable attitude.

    You might want to tell them to upload a show called "My 600 pound life," for some major motivation not to do that. After watching these 8 episodes, it's very clear that the calorie deficit for them is the exact same as here, in MFP. No difference same strategy of eat less, move more. Furthermore these shows make it very clear that only 5% of those that go thru weight loss surgery, are successful at keeping it off, long term. IOW, many go back to their old consumption habits, their stomach grows and their fat and unhealthy again, after a few years. And in the meantime they develop type 2 diabetes, heart disease and everything else associated with being fat, and there is no magic surgery to cure that, no matter how skinny they get after weight loss surgery. The only thing they're left with are a bunch of surgery scars to prove to others they had weight loss surgery.

    My advice to you is to go back to the gym and make it your 2nd home. And you do it yourself, you don't need someone to go with you, and one day, hopefully you'll find some smarter more active friends.

    Welcome and Good luck!
  • pattigorman
    pattigorman Posts: 33 Member
    Hey MirandaC,
    You can be proud of yourself! You are very important! You are thinking of MirandaC and that's what's most important. I've been on a similar journey ever since my teens. Fitness Pal has been terrific for me as far as seeing everything I eat and how many calories and nutrients, sugars and fats I take in. Very enlightening. One of the best parts also is the privacy of your 'food' and 'exercise' page. I never have to fib, etc. Only I see it so I can actually know what is really happening.
    Also, I've finally admitted to myself that I have an Eating Disorder - emotional eating/binging. For the past 4 months I have been going to a ED therapist and nutritionalist. My main problem is allowing the ED to run my life for me. Am now in the process of fighting off the ED persuasions, doing mindful eating and taking back my life. Finding the real me.

    My best to you! A good mantra = no matter how you do, good, bad, ugly - I am still terrific and I can enter my food & movements in My Fitness Pal and start/restart and keep my "STREAK" going!
  • lisanangel
    lisanangel Posts: 148 Member
    Feel free to add me I'm trying to lose my last 27 pounds
  • MiirandaC
    MiirandaC Posts: 14 Member
    Oh trust me. I have told them they are insane. I don't understand how they say that either. Their mom recently had weight loss surgery and lost about 60 lbs since. And it's exactly what you said, she still eats the same stuff, to the point where she throws up.

    They probably drink a 12 pack of Pepsi a day alone. Take out a few times a day. They just don't care. Fat and happy they say. That will never be me. They plan to get the surgery and think the weight will drop off. They look at it as a miracle cure.

    I know you have to work for things you want, so marks the start of my journey. Besides. I would rather spend my money on new boobs when I finally have the body I feel confident in than a surgery that may or may not work! Haha!
  • Val8less
    Val8less Posts: 107 Member
    Way to go!...you know what needs to be done...and you are doing it...feel free to friend me!
  • hearthwood
    hearthwood Posts: 794 Member
    Oh trust me. I have told them they are insane. I don't understand how they say that either. Their mom recently had weight loss surgery and lost about 60 lbs since. And it's exactly what you said, she still eats the same stuff, to the point where she throws up.

    They probably drink a 12 pack of Pepsi a day alone. Take out a few times a day. They just don't care. Fat and happy they say. That will never be me. They plan to get the surgery and think the weight will drop off. They look at it as a miracle cure.

    I know you have to work for things you want, so marks the start of my journey. Besides. I would rather spend my money on new boobs when I finally have the body I feel confident in than a surgery that may or may not work! Haha!


    You're not alone on this board there are many that have 100 pounds to lose and a lot more that have even more than that, Set mini goals 10 to 20 pounds at a time, then it won't seem so overwhelming. Remember 2 pounds a week is a 104 pounds a year. Remember to be patient the more weight you lose the slower it comes off as you get closer to your goal. Just stick with it.

    It's just simple math, made easy with MFP. Calories in versus calories out. Be consistent and honest about logging your calorie intake everyday, and just doing that you will realize which foods a weighted down with calories, and you'll start making better choices. No weird diets no elimination of food groups. Just eat less. Eventually you'll make the life style change and it becomes easier. It's tough, you'll get hungry, just remember there is no such thing as weight loss without hunger. If I am really hungry, I do the fit girls remedy. All natural Skipoy peanut butter with honey out of the jar. One or two tablespoons is the cure for me, and there are lots of other remedies on this board

    I am glad you're starting with Curves, but please if your mom can't go with you, you make sure you go. You'll make friends there. There's nothing that burns fat faster than muscles. Eventually and as you start losing add in some cardio to your exercise plan. Pick something you enjoy doing, that insures you'll stick with it.

    Good Luck you can do this.
  • Weightlosstips
    Weightlosstips Posts: 59 Member
    Welcome Miranda,
    The will to begin is one of the greatest parts of the journey.Feel free to add me as a friend.

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