anxiety and depression issues

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I do not trust medications. Doctors have thrown anti depressants on me waiting if anything would stick. Well, the immediate result was substantial weight gain, which made me, a usual slim person, immediately more depressed. I also found that medication changed my brain chemistry in a way that I became aggressive and suicidal. I hear stories from people who were helped by medication, but few.

I think talk therapy with emphasis on behavioral changes would be ideal, but nobody seems to pay for it and when you are not independently wealthy, you cannot afford it. And then you have to find a therapist, who is good, which may be difficult.

I can see that eating very healthy makes a difference, I also discovered that biking helps me and the difference how I feel when I do not bike, is enormous. In your case I would certainly try everything to lose weight, it will probably open up a whole new world of social activities for your. Start by walking and try to find a walking group in your neighborhood. Or do as I do start biking. Both activities are not very expensive and you can always join a group at your level. Hobbies which involve other people are always helpful to overcome depression.

I can see why some people do not like or trust meds, but they are literally life-savers for some of us. I do not promote that people take them, but if the dr is suggesting them, I will give my two cents on what types or any information with which I have experience. I am sorry meds didn't work for you, but many times, if they do not work, that means you do not need them. depression and other mental disorders are chemical imbalances which required meds to steady the brain. if someone just takes meds when they have no "real" issue, I can see where they wouldn't work.

I don't mean this to be rude, but joining a group or starting a hobby is near impossible if you are depressed. it sounds like an easy thing to do, but true depression isn't fixed by being around other people. some days, we literally cannot get out of bed.

true depression isn't fixed by being around other people. some days, we literally cannot get out of bed.

Yes, this is real depression. This, in my opinion, is the main difference between situational and clinical.

I can't count how many times I've heard people say something like this: "I've been terribly depressed for years. Over the past five years in the midst of this never ending depression, I earned my master's degree, bought a house, renovated it myself and home schooled my seven French bulldogs in the foyer while practicing my harp exercises for the upcoming symphony performance I'm soloing in. But the depression just never went away."

IRL I keep my mouth shut but always secretly roll my eyes.

Unhappiness, afflluenza and discontent does not equal clinical depression.

very good point. I have heard people say similar things.

my grandmother will usually say, "shake it off!"
not that easy...

To everyone here, I highly recommend watching this talk by Greg Baugues -- http://userscape.com/laracon/2014/gregbaugues.html -- he's a phenomenal speaker who talks about depression (in this case, software developers, but the general message applies to pretty much everyone). He also has Bipolar II. And if you ever get the chance to see him speak in person, I highly recommend taking that chance.

Additionally, here's a great article from a friend of mine, about her own depression -- https://medium.com/@kayladnls/youre-not-alone-f210b82893cb .

I can't count how many times I've heard people say something like this: "I've been terribly depressed for years. Over the past five years in the midst of this never ending depression, I earned my master's degree, bought a house, renovated it myself and home schooled my seven French bulldogs in the foyer while practicing my harp exercises for the upcoming symphony performance I'm soloing in. But the depression just never went away."

IRL I keep my mouth shut but always secretly roll my eyes.

People cope with their mental health issues in different ways. That can including doing productive thing after productive thing, trying to find that thing that will bring you out of that black hole. It can also include looking like you're more successful/happy/fulfilled than you really feel (that whole "fake it til you make it" mantra).

Yes, I have a master's degree, a house, and a family. That doesn't change the fact that there are days that the only reason I get out of bed is my sense of duty to get my son to preschool and to do the job I was hired to do. That doesn't change the fact that I have, on several occasions, curled up in a ball and cried for no discernible reason (or for every reason and no reason at the same time). That doesn't change the fact that I've contemplated suicide more times than I care to admit. It doesn't change the fact that it takes every ounce of willpower I have to maintain my composure in a meeting with the principle about my son's behavior, or a meeting with my boss about my performance.

My husband worked his way up the ranks in his company from help desk phone monkey to enterprise systems administrator. That doesn't change the fact that his anxiety was a constant, low-level background noise in both of our lives, which brought down the quality of life for both of us. It doesn't change the fact that it will still sometimes spike to the point that he has an all-out panic attack.

He had a coworker that was in the position that he's in now. It's a pretty cushy job. Pays well. Minimal travel. He had a sort-of girlfriend, a decent place to live. That didn't change the fact that his paranoid schizophrenia eventually got the better of him and he ate the barrel of a shotgun.

Robin Williams' success didn't change the fact that he was still clinically depressed and eventually killed himself. The same goes for the dozens upon dozens of people who are/were famous and had great accomplishments, but suffer/ed from major depression -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_people_with_major_depressive_disorder -- including such people as Buzz Aldrin, Jim Carrey, and Drew Carey, among others.

Then, there's John Nash, who revolutionized mathematics, game theory, and economics. He even won a Nobel Prize, among others. That doesn't change the fact that he's a paranoid schizophrenic and was admitted to psychiatric hospitals multiple times during his life.

So please, don't disregard others' struggles with mental health, just because they took a different path than you, or didn't immediately self-destruct.

OP - I also suffer from anxiety and depression, and my husband suffers from anxiety as well. Here are a few things that I found that make it more manageable.

Myo-Inositol supplementation - Myo-Inositol is a pseudo-vitamin (ie - it's a nutrient that our bodies make). Studies have shown its promise in dealing with anxiety, in particular. My husband and I have been taking about 12g a day for about two months now, and have both noticed positive effects with it. His change was pretty much night and day.

Sunlight - Vitamin D, of course. Make sure you're exposing as much skin as you can for at least 15 minutes a day, whenever possible.

Whole foods diet - Nutrient deficiencies seem to be a big factor. Things tend to be more stable in general when eating a whole foods based diet and avoiding refined carbs and sugars. Even in the short run, pretty much without fail, if I have more than a tiny amount of refined carbs/sugar, I get a lot more moody and down.

I've dealt with these issues, too. I'm sorry they are creeping back up for you. I know how hard it is :frown:

For me, exercise does help those feelings of despair, but only to a point. I have tried to stop the medication and it just didn't work for me. I currently take Pristiq and Wellbutrin and it has made a world of difference.

Adding the exercise (per the direction of my psychiatrist) has helped keep me feeling "up" and I notice that as I go, I have less and less down days.

I'm sorry your insurance gives you the run around. I work in insurance billing and I understand.

I hope you are able to find something that works for you. Feel free to add me as a friend, I'm a good listener Sam

Start reading up on both, there is excellent support forums and informational articles if you just use google!

I am a very firm believer that the causes of anxiety/depression need to be addressed as much as possible before medications. I was miserable in my job and my boss actually suggested I take meds. It made me laugh...then I gave notice a few days later. I knew deep down that meds would just cover up the problems, when I knew the answer was to leave.

There is a wonderful anxiety book, the "Anxiety and Worry Workbook" that I used. It gave amazing insight into my anxiety, as well as techniques to really assess situations REALISTICALLY prior to getting worked up and anxious over stuff. This along with journalling and tracking anxiety levels on a daily basis really improved my thoughts within 30 days. I went from having panic attacks (actually attacks, not over exaggerating) every second day...now, I dont even remember my last one.

Dude I deal with OCD so I know how you feel. No matter what you're going through, just be optimistic!

true depression isn't fixed by being around other people. some days, we literally cannot get out of bed.

Yes, this is real depression. This, in my opinion, is the main difference between situational and clinical.

I can't count how many times I've heard people say something like this: "I've been terribly depressed for years. Over the past five years in the midst of this never ending depression, I earned my master's degree, bought a house, renovated it myself and home schooled my seven French bulldogs in the foyer while practicing my harp exercises for the upcoming symphony performance I'm soloing in. But the depression just never went away."

IRL I keep my mouth shut but always secretly roll my eyes.

Unhappiness, afflluenza and discontent does not equal clinical depression.

Things like that make me so angry. I have suffered from clinical depression for the past ten years. In that time I have achieved 2 degress and landed a decent full time job. That doesnt change the fact that I cannot always control my throughts. Nothing started teh depression nothing causes the depression except clearly a deficit in something in my brain.
As someone who has tried absolutely everything to help "cure" or alieviate my depression I can honestly say when you get to the point and admit that this is something you need to live with at somepoint you find ways to get on with life. I take two medications and will be on them for the rest of my life (I am 24) and I am ok with that.
What I am not ok with is someone thinking that because I have taught myself to live with depression that means I am not depressed or I am just too dramatic, or I am not trying hard enough or I want damn attention.

Interestingly enough on these threads discussing depression there seems to always be a contest, who is the most depressed . And those , who are perceived as not so depressed, are dismissed. There are enough people around who do not understand depression , those who have it , should not be part of them.
There are people who have lived with depression for a long time and have learned to deal with it with other means as medications.

Isolation certainly contributes to depression and so does being overweight . Not everybody responds well to medication , even if you do. Not all people are the same. Be a little bit more compassionate and understand that your point of view is not the only right one.

We are trying to help each other by sharing information and maybe helpful tips.