Fiance that isn't being supportive.

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  • DMRinehardt
    DMRinehardt Posts: 34
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    I second the notion that he may be quietly sabotaging your efforts because he doesn't want you to change.

    I would sit him down and tell him what you feel about his actions. I would ask him how he thinks you two can work together towards your goal while not changing his dietary habits. If he doesn't buy in to this, then I would seriously put off any wedding. Marriage is a lifelong commitment and if he is not supportive of you now, it isn't going to get better with a wedding band. Additionally, those who change their lives and get fit usually change enough that the non-fit folks seem to fade out of their lives....and that may just include him. It doesn't change the fact that you love him, it just changes the fact that you love yourself.

    I pray for the best and that he gets on board!
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
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    . I just keep losing my motivation when he's not motivated . How do y'all handle staying motivated when your around people that aren't supportive and aren't helping to keep you on track?

    That right there is the problem.

    This is journey you have to do for you, not for him or anyone else. You can't rely on anyone else to keep you on track - it's 100% your responsibility. Not everyone is going to be supportive of you, you have to draw that from within.

    Find foods you love that fit into your macros. Let yourself have a slice of pizza, or a cookie, if it fits your macros.

    Find exercise you love.

    Build a lifestyle you love for you and only you. If he wants to join, great. If not, you can't force him. Keep doing you.

    TRUTH.
    You don't need to be motivated, you need to be disciplined. You say you're staying under your calorie goal for the most part, so it sounds like you're doing well!

    and also this.

    discipline keeps you on track when motivation fails- and do not kid yourself- it is not if it fails it's WHEN. Motivation is never going to get you half the distance- even a quarter of where you want to go. Motivation is the thing that helps you make decisions to change- discipline actually HELPS YOU GET THERE.
  • SXMEnrico
    SXMEnrico Posts: 89 Member
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    he should be supporting you, not enabling you.
  • chimpy123
    chimpy123 Posts: 40 Member
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    I know it can be tempting to eat junk when others are eating it around you. Last night my fiancé scarfed 1/2 a medium pizza beside me while I waited for my healthy dinner to cook. I can't fault him for it, I want him to eat what he wants to eat. Because of our different genetics and daily activity levels we both have different calorie needs and I can't force him to only eat things that fit into my dietary needs, the poor man would lose his mind. He used to offer me bites because he felt guilty eating in front of me but I told him to stop offering, eat guilt free, and if I want some of what he's having I will ask him for a bite. For my own health it is important that I don't eat a lot of the things that he eats and we both respect that. Make sure that you are eating something healthy when you are hungry and it may help with the temptation. I was ravenous at the smell of pizza last night but my dinner of baked chicken, 1/2 sweet potatoe, 1/2 cup brown rice, and veggies left me fully satisfied and really proud that I didn't give in to the siren song of the pizza....

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