Balancing Healthy Eating with a Picky Family?

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I'm the proud mom of 3 awesome boys...with 3 very different tastes. When I try to commit myself to eating healthy I usually find myself giving up when it comes to balancing what I eat with what my family will eat. I've done my research and everything I read says "Make them eat what you eat". Well most parents would argue that it can be difficult when you have picky eaters. If your child doesn't like carrots, then he just doesn't like carrots! So here's our likes and dislikes by family member:

Me
Likes: Limited Chicken, Veggies, Fruit
Dislikes: Red Meat

Husband
Likes: Everything
Dislikes: Almost Nothing

10 Year Old
Likes: Starches, Junk Food (surprise, surprise), Limited Meat, Limited Fruits/Veggies
Dislikes: Most Veggies

3 Year Old
Likes: Most Everything We Feed Him
Dislikes: Some Veggies

1 Year Old
Likes: Veggies, Starches, Fruits
Dislikes: Veggies

So most typical dinners I cook, there is a good chance that one or more of my kids won't eat what I serve. I stand my ground most of the time and tell them TOO BAD but you can only fight with your kids so much before it's just easier to give in. So anyway...my question is this...How do you balance it out? Do you make a "normal" dinner for your family and a more diet friendly dinner for yourself? Or do you eat what you've made, but smaller portions? Or do you encourage everyone to eat the chicken and veggies you've fixed for yourself? HELP!

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  • missiontofitness
    missiontofitness Posts: 4,074 Member
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    They need to eat what you put out; there's no reason you need to make multiple items to accommodate everyone! Mealtimes shouldn't be that stressful for you. Plus, kids need their fruits and veggies. And most kids don't "like" something for the sake of not liking it. I would say to try incorporating one food they "hate" on their plate maybe once a week. Only a little at a time. Have them try it a few times. If they flat out don't want to eat dinner...too bad. They'll come around.

    You have to start them early with the fruits and veggies. When I was a kid, my parents did, and I was one of the few kids who would beeline for the fruit tray, rather than the cupcake tray. I'd really try to shake this "I hate vegetables!" ideology out of their head early, since they're actually a really awesome food group!

    Also, have you tried incorporating them into the cooking process at all? If they feel like they participated in making something, they might be more likely to eat it!

    I also wouldn't force a "chicken every night" meal plan on them. But you should try to come up with a happy medium for everyone, so you aren't stuck making separate meals for you, and your family.
  • prettymrsnelson
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    Thank you. I've tried all this and they have come around a bit. My oldest is my toughest critic and surprisingly he LOVES to help me cook dinner...he just doesn't like what we make. He even goes so far as to gulp down water with every bite he takes, or gag constantly on the food. I try to keep a variety of recipes on hand that in my mind suits everyone's tastes. We really are a chicken only family with the occasional ground beef worked in so I have an array of chicken recipes in my cook book but there are those nights that they just will not eat and I feel guilty if they leave the table hungry...especially the babies.
  • FitOldMomma
    FitOldMomma Posts: 790 Member
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    I'm an expert at picky eaters!
    The only green colored food my middle kid would eat was dill pickles or lime jello, lol.

    My oldest wasn't fond of red meat when he was younger, my youngest child hated potatoes. (Who on earth could hate potatoes?!)

    I found they all like pasta, chicken, turkey, ham, fruit,bread, and dairy (except cottage cheese) so a lot of our meals included those foods.

    But I learned to be sneaky...I'd cook up carrots or sweet potatoes and puree them and put them into homemade mac & cheese. Even the hubby didn't know I did this. I also found that if I chopped and chopped and chopped broccoli, it was easy to mix it into a lot of things: like spaghetti sauce or ground turkey meatballs. I happened to see a tv program where the woman showed tons of ways to sneak in veggies, it was wonderful.

    They're all adults now and will eat most anything; however the middle one still won't eat a green bean if his life depended on it. ;)

    I know many will say you should make the kids eat what you give them. I've never felt that way and would make sure there was something everyone would eat. If I made beef, I'd make my oldest a couple of scrambled eggs. I guess I just never felt that personal food tastes was something to argue about. It made our mealtimes nice and calm and no one left the dinner table hungry.
  • nicsflyingcircus
    nicsflyingcircus Posts: 2,502 Member
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    Thank you. I've tried all this and they have come around a bit. My oldest is my toughest critic and surprisingly he LOVES to help me cook dinner...he just doesn't like what we make. He even goes so far as to gulp down water with every bite he takes, or gag constantly on the food. I try to keep a variety of recipes on hand that in my mind suits everyone's tastes. We really are a chicken only family with the occasional ground beef worked in so I have an array of chicken recipes in my cook book but there are those nights that they just will not eat and I feel guilty if they leave the table hungry...especially the babies.

    My son used to gag on cooked veggies, but now, at almost 12,will eat all sorts though I don't think he much enjoys them. He much prefers raw veggies/salads.
  • ChildrenCryinNCoffee
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    I've never been a junk food eater (too many baked sweets during pregnancy & cocktails when I wasn't pregnant, led to weight gain), so my kids were never junk food/fast food eaters.

    My 4 & 1 year olds HATE cheese, lol. So I don't have to worry about buying Mac & Cheese, Cheeseburgers, Goldfish, etc., thank God.

    My older kids eat everything I make. When they were little, they were hesitant, but I kept offering, eventually they caved and ate. ESPECIALLY when I saved their ignored meals and gave them to them again at the next meal (ie: didn't eat broccoli at dinner, it goes in their breakfast scramble, etc.)

    It's one thing if kids REALLY don't like something, then don't force it, especially after 4-5 tries. I learned, my 1 year old LOVES green beans, but my 4 year old will ONLY eat the little seeds inside green beans--so I cut my 1 year olds beans in 1/2 and give the seeds to my 4 year old. Tedious, sure, but she's eating veggies, nothing getting wasted and I didn't have to make something special or different for anyone.

    Also, I'm THAT mommy that puts Spinach, Kale, Peas, Bananas, Figs and Almond milk (blended) into the Popsicle molds. The older two know whats in em, but they don't care. I hide at least 6 veggies inside mini meatloaf muffins. I when I bake muffins, cookies or cakes, they ALWAYS have fruits AND veggies in the batter/dough, lol.
  • shai74
    shai74 Posts: 512 Member
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    I have 4 teenagers (2 are mine and 2 are my partners but we have them full time).

    My kids :

    Always served whatever I eat, meat and veg, haven't kept junk food in the house for them to go to if they didn't want what was for dinner, haven't forced them to eat anything, never made an issue of food. Simply "this is what's for dinner". My kids eat olives, anchovies, pickles, brussel sprouts, broccoli, eggs, bacon, cheeses, anything really. Yes they still like junk food, but it's a once in a while thing, not the only thing they eat.

    My partners kids:

    Raised on convenience food. Given what they want. Used to having chips and other crap in the cupboard, and soft drinks in the fridge. Pandered to in the food department (as in, Dad doesn't buy or cook anything they don't like). As a result, they are fussy, spoiled eaters, and not very healthy.

    I don't really care. Kids who say "I don't like that" having never tried annoy me. Since I've taken over the cooking (couple of years now) I cook meat and veg or salad for dinner. No potato variants. Rarely pasta. Sometimes I cook them spaghetti or a schnitzel, I don't force them to eat low carb. But that's what we have, and that's what we eat. If they choose not to that's their problem.

    And no, it's not easy. My partners 15yo screamed a mouth full of abuse at me one night that there was "never any ****ing food in the house" and she wanted money to go to the takeawy shop because she "hadn't eaten all day". I didn't give her money. I spend $300 a week on groceries and provide them with a cooked meal every night, and a fridge full of healty food - she can get over it. Not like she lives in a 3rd world country and is starving.
  • dnamouse
    dnamouse Posts: 612 Member
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    I have two kids and my husband used to be picky.

    Note the term "used to" :wink:

    Dinner is whatever is served up on the table. Everyone gets the same. Not the same amount, obviously lol but the same general dinner.

    In our house I have to deal with coeliac disease, severe lactose intolerance, high sensitivity to artificial colours and some preservatives, and allergies to cocoa, grapes, oranges, bananas, mushrooms and a couple of other things.

    Therefore, I've already put an awful lot of thought into the dinner as it is, so they are expected to eat it lol

    It took a little while, and I know their little preferences, for eg the 7yo isn't overly keen on cooked carrots, but he will eat them, and steamed means they aren't as soft as boiled etc, so more palatable for him.
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
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    I have picky eaters here Also. So sometimes I take something that I know they like (for example chicken) and start with that, then I'll make several side items to suite each. So if one loves broccoli, and the other loves peas, then I make both sides.
    Then I'll pack up any left overs of their favorite aside dishes, and add them to the next days meals. So the left overs don't go to waste.
    Sure, it takes a little more time but for me, it's a way to make sure they get what they need and get what they like.
    So find things they all like, then tweak the rest to suite each person and use the leftovers for the next lunch or dinner.
  • Oceansky55
    Oceansky55 Posts: 5 Member
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    Agh! I'm in the same boat! Kids-4,1 with their own likes/dislikes and husband who hates ground turkey, whole grain anything and I eat like you. I hear you! I want to just fix a meal and we all eat it. My husband is typically not home for dinner during the week and Sometimes I just make something that he and the kids will enjoy (set a plate aside for him), and then I either eat stuff I know I shouldn't be or grab other crap to eat after I feed kids. I don't know what to do either. What has worked well in the past is to cook a simple meal of protein, starch, veggie and I always have bread and butter or rolls and sometimes salad or raw veggies sticks or sliced cucumber so everyone has something they can eat. I'll usually eat the protein (fish, chicken but no red meat), and the veg and salad. I'm left without protein though if I cook pork chops or steak and if I do something like shepherds pie which they all love, I only have salad. I guess I could just throw some beans in there for myself. Sometimes I make a big soup early in the week and will have that on nights where I serve pasta or red meat. I'm trying to find the balance. This is a great post because I need help with this too! I think it just takes planning. Are you home or at work during day? I think that would make a difference too. I'm home and have a tiny window in the afternoon to prep dinner when they nap and rest. The other issue is that I the later in the day it is, the crazier my kids get and I can't be in the kitchen for a solid 30-44 minutes cooking so prep ahead or super easy stuff is a must. Planning, planning planning! Ugh