Weddings and Stress...and work too?

dcollins1014
dcollins1014 Posts: 23
edited September 23 in Health and Weight Loss
Hey I know there are a lot of forums on here on how to deal with stress, and some forums on getting in shape for weddings, but I guess I just wanted to start one. First of all let me introduce myself, my name is Dawn, and I am from Ohio. I am planning on getting married on August 13,2011. I am very excited..but hoping and crossing my fingers I will stay motivated to lose weight and tone up so I can LOVE my wedding pictures.

Anyways, how do you guys handle stress, and what do you do if your are like me and an emotional eater..how do you keep from snacking?

Also, what do you do if you are hungry, do you snack on something or just hold out.

And last but not least, do any of you work third...I work third a couple nights a week from 7p-730a, and was just wondering when do I eat!! I try not to eat anything heavy on my lunchbreak but I can't see myself not eating...

well Hope all of have the best of luck staying motivated and good luck toward your goals!

Replies

  • leaseylou
    leaseylou Posts: 5
    Hi Dawn,
    when I'm feeling stressed, I go for a run or a walk instead of eating! It really blows away the cobwebs, clears the mind, and takes me away from my refrigerator. I find by the time I get back I'm so impressed with myself I don't feel like pigging out anymore, but favour a healthy snack instead to compliment my workout.

    Good luck for getting into shape for the wedding!
  • 6Janelle13
    6Janelle13 Posts: 353 Member
    i keep healthy low cal snacks or I portion a small portion of the richer stuff (ie dove dark chocolate)- 1 piece not the 5 piece bar. I also plan ahead. when i know life will get crazy, i have things pre packed and marked and i don't get off track from the plan. I also budget my fun/ a day for stress eating or just that delicious unhealthy thing. good luck!
  • dcollins1014
    dcollins1014 Posts: 23
    Thank you for your hints on what to do for stressful eating!
  • lilRicki
    lilRicki Posts: 4,555 Member
    bell peppers are my new best friend, and kashi granola bars. I'm getting married in July 2012 and I'm already a little stressed..mostly because my fiance hasn't done his guest list yet, and that's what everything is hinging on right now. My stress release is my exercise. It use to be going to the gym, now I rock out downstairs with my xbox kinect. You work wonky hours, so I'd eat lots of salads, boiled eggs, water, tea and fruit. Maybe some toast on your first break...I don't know, your metabolism is different when you work night shift. My job isn't stressful so I have no problems with that, work has become my escape lol I can't wait to get to the office, because my personal life is put on hold for 6.5 hours a day. Hang in there, do some research, google "night shift meal plans" and you'll do great.
  • jmyers1230
    jmyers1230 Posts: 67 Member
    bell peppers are my new best friend, and kashi granola bars. I'm getting married in July 2012 and I'm already a little stressed..mostly because my fiance hasn't done his guest list yet, and that's what everything is hinging on right now. My stress release is my exercise. It use to be going to the gym, now I rock out downstairs with my xbox kinect. You work wonky hours, so I'd eat lots of salads, boiled eggs, water, tea and fruit. Maybe some toast on your first break...I don't know, your metabolism is different when you work night shift. My job isn't stressful so I have no problems with that, work has become my escape lol I can't wait to get to the office, because my personal life is put on hold for 6.5 hours a day. Hang in there, do some research, google "night shift meal plans" and you'll do great.

    The guest list... oh the guest list. I've had my list done for months already and he refuses to just sit down and write it down. I need his list to make decisions on my list!

    I have a crazy schedule at work. I'm a "flex" employee which means I have no set schedule but can work up to 40 hours a week between 6am and 6pm. It's a day care so the kids have breakfast, lunch, and snack there. Teachers are supposed to eat with the kids, but we also have lunch breaks. So I eat at work depending on what times I'm in the classrooms and I take a lunch. I try not to eat a lot with the kids or at my own lunch, but it makes it harder to track calories when you don't know what is in a dish. That's why my journal has a "food at work--estimates" category. I know the kids' food is pretty healthy since we have a specified menu we have to follow.
  • dcollins1014
    dcollins1014 Posts: 23
    Oh our wedding planning has been going so slow! We don't even have a guest list really..and are wedding is this August!! I just keep saying to myself it will all fall together somehow.
  • Allison128
    Allison128 Posts: 116 Member
    Hi. I'm allison! I am getting married August 13,2011 as well! Must be a lucky day!!!

    I am on the same boat with you. I"M GOING CRAZY!!!! I am trying not to stress. It just seems that stress and drama find me. It seems like everyone around me is already married.. which is great. this isn't a race. I've never been the type to "Out do" or "One up" someone else. I just think its stupid. I just know what I want. I know what my fiance' and I want. Its our day... isn't it supposed to reflect our personalities?? It just seems that everyone around that is married feels the need to give their 2 cents. I hate people with "I've been there, done that attitude". Just because it worked for their wedding doesn't mean it will work for mine...not to mention... it doesn't mean that what we want for OURS!

    I'm so sorry. I've just met you and I just need to vent. As you can see I'm a little stressed myself. I guess I just have a hard time understanding why weddings turn people into crazy nut jobs. why? It isn't supposed to be about how much money you spend on your special ONE day. It isn't supposed to be about how much you over spent on your dried chicken and break a window dinner roll. It isn't supposed to be how much and how big and poofy your wedding dress is. It isn't supposed to be about the ice sculptors. Its about the couple. 2 people who love each other are making a commitment to love one another in front of their closest friends and family. Its not about the ring, its not about the shoes or the invititations or the favors everyone leaves behind. Its not about having the biggest cake.

    I'm just tired of it. Weddings turn people crazy and it isn't supposed to be this way. I don't want to look back at my wedding in 5, 10 or 15 years from now and just remember all of the drama that came with my special day. I try to remind myself that my mother, my sisters and I all have a different idea of what a wedding is about. Their idea is very different from mine. I wish they would see that. I try to tell them what I want and I get called a bridezilla... which is not me at all. Call me Frugalzilla.

    All a girl wants is her mom to be on her side for her wedding day. Every girl wants her mother to LOVER her wedding dress and think its the most perfect one and it looks perfect on her. I don't want to hear "Well.. its not my taste... but Its your day". ****ING HUMOR ME! My mom freaked when I told her I bought blue heels for my dress. "Blue? Why blue? that's just not something MY generation would do"

    I'm the most down to eath person you will meet. I don't see a marriage as one day but as the rest of my life. I don't want to spend a fortune on ONE day. I'd rather have a small, intimate wedding that is rhinestone free. I'd rather spend money on making my house a home. People are missing the big picture here. It just makes me laugh because these same people tell me "Don't stress, enjoy this time.." But they are the one's STRESSING me out!

    I personally like to drink wine when I'm stressed... to answer your question =) I like to blast music and go to the gym too.

    Good luck and congrats. Dn't get sucked into the drama. Stay true to yourself.
  • lilRicki
    lilRicki Posts: 4,555 Member
    Hi. I'm allison! I am getting married August 13,2011 as well! Must be a lucky day!!!

    I am on the same boat with you. I"M GOING CRAZY!!!! I am trying not to stress. It just seems that stress and drama find me. It seems like everyone around me is already married.. which is great. this isn't a race. I've never been the type to "Out do" or "One up" someone else. I just think its stupid. I just know what I want. I know what my fiance' and I want. Its our day... isn't it supposed to reflect our personalities?? It just seems that everyone around that is married feels the need to give their 2 cents. I hate people with "I've been there, done that attitude". Just because it worked for their wedding doesn't mean it will work for mine...not to mention... it doesn't mean that what we want for OURS!

    I'm so sorry. I've just met you and I just need to vent. As you can see I'm a little stressed myself. I guess I just have a hard time understanding why weddings turn people into crazy nut jobs. why? It isn't supposed to be about how much money you spend on your special ONE day. It isn't supposed to be about how much you over spent on your dried chicken and break a window dinner roll. It isn't supposed to be how much and how big and poofy your wedding dress is. It isn't supposed to be about the ice sculptors. Its about the couple. 2 people who love each other are making a commitment to love one another in front of their closest friends and family. Its not about the ring, its not about the shoes or the invititations or the favors everyone leaves behind. Its not about having the biggest cake.

    I'm just tired of it. Weddings turn people crazy and it isn't supposed to be this way. I don't want to look back at my wedding in 5, 10 or 15 years from now and just remember all of the drama that came with my special day. I try to remind myself that my mother, my sisters and I all have a different idea of what a wedding is about. Their idea is very different from mine. I wish they would see that. I try to tell them what I want and I get called a bridezilla... which is not me at all. Call me Frugalzilla.

    All a girl wants is her mom to be on her side for her wedding day. Every girl wants her mother to LOVER her wedding dress and think its the most perfect one and it looks perfect on her. I don't want to hear "Well.. its not my taste... but Its your day". ****ING HUMOR ME! My mom freaked when I told her I bought blue heels for my dress. "Blue? Why blue? that's just not something MY generation would do"

    I'm the most down to eath person you will meet. I don't see a marriage as one day but as the rest of my life. I don't want to spend a fortune on ONE day. I'd rather have a small, intimate wedding that is rhinestone free. I'd rather spend money on making my house a home. People are missing the big picture here. It just makes me laugh because these same people tell me "Don't stress, enjoy this time.." But they are the one's STRESSING me out!

    I personally like to drink wine when I'm stressed... to answer your question =) I like to blast music and go to the gym too.

    Good luck and congrats. Dn't get sucked into the drama. Stay true to yourself.


    Oh well said...my mother HATES my party favors, she said "well those aren't something I would give"....and she's really not down with the eco-friendly theme either. So I'm on my own. She even told me I'm not allowed to drink at my wedding, let alone red wine. I picked my favorite red wine to be the table wine, why wouldn't I drink it? Because I might spill on my dress? that's waht tide pens are for! But I have wonderful support in my foster sister...she just gives me facts and ideas, not advice and what "she did"...
  • Rupeedoo
    Rupeedoo Posts: 46
    We've set our date for Sept 1st and don't get me started on the mother... mine's not even coming!!! My parents disapprove of my choice in fiance because he isn't the same religion as them. That's brought a whole world of problems with it!
    All I can do is concentrate on losing the weight, loving my man and getting married. I can't really cope with much more right now!
  • lilRicki
    lilRicki Posts: 4,555 Member
    We've set our date for Sept 1st and don't get me started on the mother... mine's not even coming!!! My parents disapprove of my choice in fiance because he isn't the same religion as them. That's brought a whole world of problems with it!
    All I can do is concentrate on losing the weight, loving my man and getting married. I can't really cope with much more right now!


    Oh my dear...that must be tough. I'm very thankful that my parents love my fiance...his parent's however, have this strange misconception of who I am...they don't even give me a chance. But they're very nasty and horrible people that I don't want in my life anyways, and neither does my fiance. Religion can be tough, as long as both parties stay respectful of each other's beliefs instead of rude and immature, hopefully they can have some sort of mutual agreement to be nice.
  • Rupeedoo
    Rupeedoo Posts: 46
    everyone is being very British about it so we're not allowed to discuss it with my mum because she gets very upset I'm 'marrying out' and then my dad goes nuts for making her cry. So we pretend there's nothing wrong, go to dinner and discuss weather etc. They're allowed to be rude enough to publicly announce they're not coming but we aren't to discuss it with them.
    We've come to a point now where if they change their minds then great, and if not we'll just have to hope this stupidity stops after we're married. I've had a few people in the community ask me why I've chosen to have a proper wedding (as opposed to eloping) as if I should be ashamed of it! So we're going big! haha.
    I'm lucky to have amazing in-laws who are trying very hard not to judge my parents, although it must be so hurtful that their son doesn't seem good enough for them.
    Chin up... Parents in law do the strangest things sometimes to declare their territory. Does your fiance have siblings? I think it's worse with the parents of only children.. empty nest syndrome etc. x
  • brownsugar84
    brownsugar84 Posts: 40 Member
    Ah yes, the wedding stress! My day is this year on Oct 22nd.. and it it just me or is 2011 going by WAY TOO FAST?? I completely understand the feeling of being overwhelmed by work and wedding planning and the feeling that there's too much to do and too little time. I've started my weight loss journey, and so far have been on schedule. Here are some points that have been working for me:
    i) MFP is an awesome tool to think about food and gather opinions and strategies from others who have been successful in their goals.
    ii) If you feel stressed, I agree with the PP - run FROM the fridge and go for a walk/run/gym, or call a friend to vent.
    iii) Be organized with your weekly grocery list so you will always be armed with a variety of healthy options when you feel like snacking. I have a ton of little baggies and tupperware with veggies, fruits, nuts, etc. I also make sure to always have a bottle of water in my purse at all times.
    iv) My wedding will have 350-400 guests. I am receiving a crap load of opinions on how things should be done. Ex. I have a friend who said to me the other day, "Why are you buying a dress? Just rent one! There's no point and it's foolish to buy one because what will you do with it?" I couldn't help but feel annoyed but I always try to remember that my loved ones always have the best intentions to be helpful, but when I'm always hearing their help, it can been extremely irritating, so i've been responding with ...."That's a great point, and thank you for your help and for thinking of me! We still have some time so will definitely keep that in mind when examining options. Thanks again!"... I find that response seriously works for almost EVERYTHING! Listen (or pretend to listen) to all of the advice you receive, thank them so they will stop talking and also feel good about themself, and then go ahead and do what you want to do! :)
  • tater8589
    tater8589 Posts: 616
    Oh our wedding planning has been going so slow! We don't even have a guest list really..and are wedding is this August!! I just keep saying to myself it will all fall together somehow.

    Just keep in mind that the wedding is your day, have fun with it! get your best girl friend to help you, it'll take some of the stress off. Trust me if I can plan an entire wedding in 2 weeks you have plenty of time :) Also when your feeling stressed, try getting a massage it'll help relax you.
  • brownsugar84
    brownsugar84 Posts: 40 Member
    Rupeedoo - I just read your post - I'm so sorry, that sounds really tough. I think what you're doing already is best; avoid the wedding talk with your folks (but enjoy the planning with your friends, your fiance, your in-laws and with people who are supportive). Just keep focused on on the fact that you will be marrying your soulmate, and even though it's hard, your parents will eventually come around. I've seen how marrying outside the religion can be really tough. Are they concerned about the traditions and religion not being passed on to your kids?
  • catherine1979
    catherine1979 Posts: 704 Member
    Well, I must have been drunk when we chose our date... December 23, 2011!! As if there isn't enough to do to get ready for the holidays! In all seriousness, we thought it would be a great time to do it as all the people we love who live away will be home for the holidays.

    Our wedding is still more than 10 months away and I haven't really felt any stress related to it yet. We have a venue, we have an officiant, we have a caterer, a photographer, and a cake. All the really crucial things are taken care of. Our venue can't accomodate more than 100, so we know we're going to have to be brutal with the guest list.

    I work 50 plus hours a week, have a three year old and recenly we bought our first home, so no shortage of things to do in my "spare" time. I just do my best to ensure I have plenty of healthy snack options and drink lots of water to keep me on track.
  • tater8589
    tater8589 Posts: 616
    We've set our date for Sept 1st and don't get me started on the mother... mine's not even coming!!! My parents disapprove of my choice in fiance because he isn't the same religion as them. That's brought a whole world of problems with it!
    All I can do is concentrate on losing the weight, loving my man and getting married. I can't really cope with much more right now!

    Mine was different issues, but I can understand. My husband and I planned to elope and take a year to plan for and save for a wedding at home (we are military) Anywho, we let our parents know our plans. His forced us to plan a wedding (in 2 weeks) and refused to help pay for ANYTHING and they were mad because we were "rushing" the wedding. They also tried to make demands on who would be flower girl etc.. I put my foot down cause I have family too-- grr. My father and his wife wouldn't come cause they were saving to go to a church dinner a month later a couple cities over from us (they had a year to save for the trip). Family can make things more difficult, but its still your day and you can enjoy it. I'm sorry your parents don't understand. I wish you the best of luck with eveything.
  • Rupeedoo
    Rupeedoo Posts: 46
    That's exactly what they're worried about. I spent my first 19 years in religious schooling and came to the conclusion that I just don't believe in it. I haven't been practising for about 10 years now! My family are orthodox though and it's been a very hard journey for them to watch me 'go off the rails' (I'd like to add at this point that I'm a cat-nap-by-the-fire kinda girl and the least likely rebel ever!). The stupidity of it all is that the more insulting they are about our wedding, the less likely my fiance is likely to allow any kids we do have to spend time with them. I keep a couple of silly traditions that are nothing more to me than that but my parents are desperately sad that their grandchildren won't fully understand their faith (except it won't actually be their faith, it'll be my parents').
    Sorry didn't mean to highjack this topic... x
  • tater8589
    tater8589 Posts: 616
    lilRiki just a tip-- I read you could use a tide pen, Baby wipes work better and don't leave a wet spot like tide pens :) good luck
  • Rupeedoo
    Rupeedoo Posts: 46
    We've set our date for Sept 1st and don't get me started on the mother... mine's not even coming!!! My parents disapprove of my choice in fiance because he isn't the same religion as them. That's brought a whole world of problems with it!
    All I can do is concentrate on losing the weight, loving my man and getting married. I can't really cope with much more right now!

    Mine was different issues, but I can understand. My husband and I planned to elope and take a year to plan for and save for a wedding at home (we are military) Anywho, we let our parents know our plans. His forced us to plan a wedding (in 2 weeks) and refused to help pay for ANYTHING and they were mad because we were "rushing" the wedding. They also tried to make demands on who would be flower girl etc.. I put my foot down cause I have family too-- grr. My father and his wife wouldn't come cause they were saving to go to a church dinner a month later a couple cities over from us (they had a year to save for the trip). Family can make things more difficult, but its still your day and you can enjoy it. I'm sorry your parents don't understand. I wish you the best of luck with eveything.

    Thanks :) I know it'll be fine... many a bride has had parent problems and survived!
    Your in-laws sound delightful haha! How on earth did you plan a wedding in 2 weeks???
  • tater8589
    tater8589 Posts: 616
    Rupeedoo- It was hard lol. We didn't get the park we wanted cause it was already booked, but the other was cheeper and covered (which worked out cause it rained) and I made the boquets myself. My cake was an icecream cake from our fav icecream shop, I got our cake topper at Things Remembered and had it engraved. We used red plastic to cover the benches at the wedding site and bought the decorations at The Party Store and Michaels. I made the party favors and bought wine glasses and cake serving set that I could put beads or glitter type stuff in to match. We had our invitations made at The Party Store in one day and only paid about $20 for them. It was hectic, but I had fun doing it. I still wish we'd had more time and money-- I wanted real flowers. Oh, and I got lucky with my dress, I found one in store that fit perfectly (for $200) For our reception we just reserved a room big enough for the people we knew would be there at a local restaruant. My regret there was that we couldn't pay for everyones meal, but we let everyone know ahead of time that cake was free but meal was on them.

    I'll put some of the pics on my profile so you can see. It wasn't my dream wedding, but for the lack of time it was prettier than I expected.
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