Negative person - no wonder I struggle to get anywhere

This must be my 100th time of starting from scratch. In all these years I have got no where yet my other half has gone from nothing to competing in triathlons in 2 years. Yes, I had excuses when the children were young but now both in school and life is much easier yet I have no drive and when I do make the effort (after every excuse under the sun) I struggle to run down the road - not because I cant my mental attitude tells me I have to stop and its pointless.

This negative animal in my head is spoiling it for me yet I need to exercise so feel in this viscous circle - any tips from people who have kicked this animal out.

ps. I am busy most of the time I run a business and endless chores to do so I'm not lazy or stuck in a rut but there is time and I have the luxury of flexibility.

Replies

  • dcresider
    dcresider Posts: 1,272 Member
    It just takes a half hour walk to start activity. That's 30 minutes of your time.That's all. Just take it from there and make small goals. You CAN do it if you really want to.
  • LifeWithPie
    LifeWithPie Posts: 552 Member
    It just takes a half hour walk to start activity. That's 30 minutes of your time.That's all. Just take it from there and make small goals. You CAN do it if you really want to.

    That's it. You either want to..or you don't. There really aren't any tips that will help. It's your responsibility to make the changes in your own life, but you have to want to bad enough.
  • I've never actually seen a negative person admit it, so good for you on taking that step!

    First off, do not compare yourself to anyone else. Comparison is a recipe for disaster.

    Second, take small steps. Don't think that you have to do a triathlon in order to make a difference. Even getting out for a 15 minute walk is a great start. Take it slow and make small goals. Once you start becoming more active, you will enjoy it and find ways to fit it into your day.

    Lastly, realize that you do not need exercise in order to lose weight. If your goal is weight loss and you're overwhelmed with fitting in exercise, focus instead on your eating habits and staying within your calorie goal and bring exercise into the equation once you've mastered the eating part. Exercise is great for your health, but not necessary if your main goal is weight loss.
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    Maybe you just don't like running? You don't HAVE to run to lose weight, or do any exercise for that matter, as BinkyBonk pointed out. Personally, I'm on the fence about running. Sometimes I LOVE it, sometimes I'd much rather just go for a nice long walk or pop in a workout DVD or do some weight training. Find what's fun and interesting and/or challenging for you (or even a few things if you can manage) and you'll be more likely to stick with it.

    If you actually do like running maybe you need to just mix it up? Find different routes to run that are hilly or meander thorugh neighborhoods you've never explored. Don't just run out your front door every time, drive to the next town over if you have to in order to keep it interesting. Sign up for races or find people to run with if you think that'll help.
  • MusclenMascara
    MusclenMascara Posts: 50 Member
    Hey, I used to be one of those negative, unmotivated individuals......and then I discovered Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred. Honestly, it changed me...

    I went from a negative nancy to a happy, motivated person. Try it, you can get the first level of the workout on You Tube and it only takes 25 minutes. I started that back in January, now I've moved onto lifting which I absolutely love!

    You can change.....but it all depends how badly you want it. Good luck!
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
    I agree that you need to find exercise you enjoy. I love lifting - I went to the gym today and just did cardio as I'm not feeling great and I was so bored, if I was just doing that I'd have no motivation.

    I'm a negative self-destructive person who loses motivation all the time but I manage to get myself to the gym in my lunch breaks because I love to lift!

    Another good tip I found was to make it an appointment in your day - I set it as appointments in my work calendar - so you don't skip it.
  • MelanieRBrace
    MelanieRBrace Posts: 245 Member
    Start small and reward your efforts. Going for a walk is a good place to start, work it up from there. Remember that noone can do it but yourself. It does take pushing yourself and it's not always easy but once you start it will come. Starting out is often the toughest part. I schedule a set time everyday, like an appointment or meeting. You're worth it so don't cancel on yourself.
  • BeingKevin2
    BeingKevin2 Posts: 13 Member
    I feel your pain because I have stood where you stand. I know how hard it is to go from somebody who thinks they can’t to somebody who knows they can. I spent decades slowly going from big, to overweight, to obese, to I might not life much longer – every step of the way I decided to lose weight and ultimately quit, because I couldn’t do it.

    I can’t give you some magical words of wisdom that will get you over your negative thoughts but I can tell you this: you can do it. Despite not knowing anything about you I can say with great certainty that if I can get healthy than anybody, including you, can do it as well.

    Somebody once told me that losing over 200 pounds would be an extraordinary accomplishment but not to worry because every day ordinary people do extraordinary things. I said bull**** – I don’t buy it, ordinary people don’t do extraordinary things, extraordinary people do.

    I thought long about that conversation, and my feelings about it, since then and I still believe that theory is bull****. It isn’t that ordinary people are doing extraordinary things; it is that people who seem to be ordinary let their extraordinary out. You have extraordinariness in you, just let it out. As you do you will become more confident in yourself than you ever imagined. You will accomplish what you want to accomplish. You will believe in you - believe me.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,030 Member
    This must be my 100th time of starting from scratch. In all these years I have got no where yet my other half has gone from nothing to competing in triathlons in 2 years. Yes, I had excuses when the children were young but now both in school and life is much easier yet I have no drive and when I do make the effort (after every excuse under the sun) I struggle to run down the road - not because I cant my mental attitude tells me I have to stop and its pointless.

    This negative animal in my head is spoiling it for me yet I need to exercise so feel in this viscous circle - any tips from people who have kicked this animal out.

    ps. I am busy most of the time I run a business and endless chores to do so I'm not lazy or stuck in a rut but there is time and I have the luxury of flexibility.
    Lol, so the majority of my kickboxing clients are either running a business or are an exec in some company. Beating a bag with gloves and kicking it has done WONDERS for them in the hour they are there a couple of times a week.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
    Agree with others. Find something you love to do and it won't be a chore to do. I love my water aerobics. Find some cheap or free class to try out new things.
  • SDkitty
    SDkitty Posts: 446 Member
    In my experience, whenever I'm being negative it's because I'm afraid I'm going to fail. This applies to everything, not just getting back in shape.

    "The success or failure of your deeds does not add up to the sum of your life. Your spirit cannot be weighed. Judge yourself by the intentions of your actions, and by the strength with which you faced the challenges that have stood in your way." -Oma Desala

    When you mess up, skip a workout, eat too many calories, do not put all your focus on those negative things. Focus instead on accepting the fact that you didn't make time for the work and figure out why. Were you too tired, or too busy, or just feeling lazy that day? Focus on fixing the causes of the mistakes and sooner or later your good intentions will start spilling out as good actions.

    always focus on the positive action to the negative problem :flowerforyou: