Partying and health. Mission impossible?

This might sound crazy, but it's possible to have a social life without getting falldown, sh*tfaced drunk on a weekly basis.

Prove it.

I have went out this year sober more than I have since I started drinking. It is actually fun when you don't have alcohol goggles on dictating your night.

I cut my drinking down from several times a week, to getting falldown *kitten* faced drunk about twice a month. I still feel like I'm pretty healthy and maintain my weight. You just need to find a good balance.

(I'm kidding, BTW)

Not going to say stop drinking and partying because we all know you aren't going to do that (and even though it doesn't fit with my lifestyle, I sympathize with others). I've haven't had a single drink in about 3 years, but any chance you can do it a little less often? Maybe once a month? I can eat 4000 cals a day but I limit myself to one "refeed" day a month (unless my body needs it more). Maybe be the DD on the the other 3 nights of the month?

I've gone through diet phases when I had great success in losing weight and completely cut out the alcohol and partying. But there was no balance there so it was not sustainable and I'd end up putting the weight back on as soon as I started going out again.

This go around, I am not attempting to completely avoid going out. Instead, I'm planning ahead for the next several weeks to prioritize the times when I really consider the calories to be worth it. For October, it is TX-OU weekend and Halloween. Other than that, I really don't want or need the empty calories.

Long way of saying that a little planning can help you find some balance.

Thanks for the answer everyone.

Obviously balance is key I just would like to point out that finding good balance can be quite tricky when you're 22 years old, we're still learning life after all.

In regards to drinking & socializing, I do enjoy drinking. I do not drink for others and I'd have a really hard time having (as much) fun if I wasn't drinking. Moderation is obviously key but especially in the area I'm from, drinking in mass has become a culture and relying on making the smart decision to stop once you're already 4 or 5 drinks in can easily go wrong.

So don't try to stop at 4 or 5 drinks. Start slow too. Have ONE drink. Have some water. Have some food. Go dance. Play pool. Have another drink. Start slow. Maintain the slow pace all evening.

This is the story of my life. I just figured I need to look for new friends who share my interest in sports/conversations/culture.

But honestly, the longer I didn't go out, the more repulsed I got by drunk people and party culture in general. This does not seem to be the case with you, so I don't really have any suggestions, sorry.

This might sound crazy, but it's possible to have a social life without getting falldown, sh*tfaced drunk on a weekly basis.

Prove it.

I have went out this year sober more than I have since I started drinking. It is actually fun when you don't have alcohol goggles on dictating your night.

I've found this to be true, also. Plus, I feel just fine the next day. Everyone else? Not so much. I like both enjoying my evening out AND my entire day the next day (instead of spending most of it trying to recover). Not trying to be preachy. Just stating what I've found, personally.

I had those you wake up still drunk the next day.

Shamefully, I've had a few of those myself. Thankfully less than I can count on one hand. I quickly learned the 'fun" the night before was NOT worth feeling like that.
Good for you! Sounds like you've made a lot of positive changes in your life.

If you can't be social without drinking in excess, you probably need friends that you enjoy being around when they're sober. Or you have a problem with liquor.

If you're happy not going out and drinking, that is not having a suboptimal social life. That you think the only way to optimize your social life is by getting drunk, is a problem. You need friends whose sober company you enjoy or maybe a hobby.

While I agree with this in theory, I do think it's a little short sighted. He's 22 and he's an introvert. I'm going to guess that his friends are young, too, and they are doing what a lot people do when they are 22, which is go to bars and drink. This doesn't make his friends good or bad, or mean he needs new friends, or has a suboptimal social life with the friends he has.

It just means that he needs to:

1. Find a balance
2. Find activities that build self-esteem so that the shyness combined with being introverted don't compel him to drink too much. To your point, hobbies are great for this...

I'm 23 and never been much of a drinker or partier. It was never an issue until I started dating my current bf. His family views alchohol consumption to quanities that make me uncomfortable as totally normal and it's a hard thing to adjust to.

I don't have much advice for the OP, being in a similar sort of situation myself. But for me, it's less that I want to drink, and more I'm not used to being around drunk people and as an introvert it's hard to deal with that peer pressure. I just kind of deal with it one day at a time, learn what my triggers are, and set boundaries for myself. If you're happy not going out, then you shouldn't have to go out. Your life is what you want to make it, right?

I really try to stay away from giving personal advice to people I don't know, but I just wanted to say, be careful with this! I, too, married into a family of drinkers. There's a lot more to it than I thought. In your case, be particularly mindful if this is long-term and you think about having children. The children grow up with the illusion that drinking is required or necessary. Moderate drinking, when they're of age, is fine. Excessive and/or underage drinking is not. If you don't have the support of your SO on this topic it's super hard to get the message across to your children.

IDK, it's hard for me to explain fully, but it's one of those things that can really endanger a relationship. Good luck! I do wish you the best.

If you can't be social without drinking in excess, you probably need friends that you enjoy being around when they're sober. Or you have a problem with liquor.

If you're happy not going out and drinking, that is not having a suboptimal social life. That you think the only way to optimize your social life is by getting drunk, is a problem. You need friends whose sober company you enjoy or maybe a hobby.

While I agree with this in theory, I do think it's a little short sighted. He's 22 and he's an introvert. I'm going to guess that his friends are young, too, and they are doing what a lot people do when they are 22, which is go to bars and drink. This doesn't make his friends good or bad, or mean he needs new friends, or has a suboptimal social life with the friends he has.

It just means that he needs to:

1. Find a balance
2. Find activities that build self-esteem so that the shyness combined with being introverted don't compel him to drink too much. To your point, hobbies are great for this...

This is true. Perhaps he has not yet realized that there are no drink police and if he drinks slowly people don't usually notice. Especially once they get really drunk.

I think people are assuming he is drinking because his friends are pressuring him to drink. I don't think that's what happening. I think he's drinking too much to deal with his introverted nature in a social environment.

This might sound crazy, but it's possible to have a social life without getting falldown, sh*tfaced drunk on a weekly basis.

Try healthier social activities. I play tennis and hang out with people during matches. I might have a beer or two, but being able to complete trumps my interest in making the focus just drinking.

I was attracted to this thread because I had a couple days like you described. A few drinks watching baseball turned into many more with a nasty hangover the next day. It was abnormal for me. I learned over the years how to manage the hangovers, still be social and enjoy some social drinking. I'm by no means perfect -- but I still, I'm in my 30s now and no longer doing the cheeseburger hangover cure.

Plan in advance.
1) If I have a party or a work dinner I will throw in extra exercise minutes earlier in the day or get off the train a stop early and walk the extra half mile
2) Be honest with yourself and add your alcohol calories earlier in the day. This helps me because I'll factor in say 4 glasses of wine and when I hit 4 glasses, I stop. Adding into your diary sets this in stone. It also helps me keep my calories for the day lower to accomodate the empty calories.

During the evening
3) Limit the additional sugar. Don't drink heavy beer, no sugary mixers etc. I stick to a vodka or whisky press (soda with a splash of sprite) or wine. This was by far the best thing I did because I can sleep through the night and I don't get heartburn as I used to.
4) Be diligent about drinking a glass of water in between drinks. Not only does this slow down the drinking but you stay hydrated.

The next day
5) Just get out of bed once you wake up and drink a glass of water. Maybe eat something small (I like light string cheese). If you don't have to go to work, you can always get back into bed.
6) Go for a walk. This was extremely helpful for me. I have a fitbit so it's tracking those calories burned but most importantly you start to sweat out the alcohol, drink more water, get your blood flowing, crave good food, feel better about yourself etc.
7) Eat a reasonably healthy breakfast. An egg on a slice of toast or english muffin is my go-to.

Probably don't want to do this everyday I agree with others that finding other social activities such as sport is a great way to socialize without drinking. But with some planning, you can still socially drink.



HTH!