I give up

2

Replies

  • JillyCornwall
    JillyCornwall Posts: 376 Member
    I don't feel like I'm starving myself, though, at all. I'm just not hungry (and often force myself to eat even then). When I'm not eating unhealthy foods, there is just not enough calories in healthy ones, lol. I could easily make up the calories by having a cheesesteak for dinner instead of a chicken breast and broccoli, and make up the calories, but that seems....not to be the right thing to do, lol. Should I be forcing myself to eat when I'm really not hungry?

    And like I said, I drink a TON of water--20-30 cups per day. I know I have alot of sodium (something else I am working on) but I feel like that much water should negate it. Also, I'm not discouraged about the progress/lack thereof, but that it is going backwards despite me trying harder than ever this week to do it right.


    Don't give up, looking at your food diary it looks to me like a DIET plan and not necessarily a healthy eating plan that you can maintain for the rest of your life. Try to include some complex carbs in the form of wholegrain bread,rice etc. Add some fruits as snacks. Vary your veggies a little to keep your interest up.
    Now the water.....I really think you are OVER filling up on water....8-12 glasses a day is plenty....this will make room for some nice healthy food. No I don't think you should add the high calorie high fat food back into your diet that got you to this stage..you need to look at a whole new healthy way of eating as a LIFE plan..not a short 3 weeks of misery then give up. C'mon you can do it..we are all here to help.
  • heathersmilez
    heathersmilez Posts: 2,579 Member
    I don't feel like I'm starving myself, though, at all.

    That's what happens when your body goes into starvation mode. Your brain shuts down extra non-essential synapses and puts all the focus on maintaining your organs and bodily functioning on whatever muscle tissue and fat reserves you have.

    Your mind isn't busy telling you that you are hungry if you've already gone a long period of time without eating enough calories, its busy trying to save its life b/c you've already given up listening to it.
  • princesshoagie
    princesshoagie Posts: 34 Member
    I have to echo what everyone else is saying here. I've been doing this for three weeks as well and I've only lost 3 or 4 pounds, I'd love to have lost 7! But, I am exercising every day and I've discovered mellow yoga for stress relief. And it feels good! Don't you just want to feel good? Find something you like to do that doesn't feel like a workout (go to an indoor rock climbing gym - best workout ever! try Zumba, take a hip hop dancing class...anything that gets you moving!).

    Also, you need to get creative with your meals. Virtually ANY food has a healthy "substitute." Check out hungrygirl.com for some good ides. She has recipes for diet friendly "fried" mozzerella sticks, pizza, mac and cheese even! For example, if you are truly craving a cheesesteak, make one yourself! Get a good cut of steak (with as little fat as possible) and cook it up in the skillet with peppers and onions. Get some reduced fat cheese (Hungry girl has a recipe for diet-friendly cheese sauce!) and a whole wheat sandwich hoagie and put it all together! It'll taste good, you'll feel better because you actually cooked it and it will be friendly to your diet.

    Please don't quit!
  • I have heard recently it takes 21 days to form new habits.
    Don't give up, if your persevere, I can pretty much garantee you will feel so much better, energy, outlook and just proud of your accomplishment even if for a while it is knowing you arre making good choices for yourself.
    One day at a time, one step at a time and you will get there.
  • cranberrycat
    cranberrycat Posts: 233 Member
    Just chiming in with my 2cents, I agree with all of the above. Don't whine about 7# in 3 weeks!

    Not to put a damper on things, but you probably didn't lose 7# in fat, anyway. Our bodies can only lose so much fat per week, and 7# is a bit much to expect in such a short time. It is likely that you lost SOME fat, but the 7# on the scale represents water loss as well as fat loss. So, now you feel like you are going backwards? Well, it is your body trying to catch up with the fluid losses over the past few weeks.

    I haven't peeked at your diary, but from what everyone else said, you aren't eating enough. YOU NEED TO EAT what your body needs to function. Otherwise, you will lose water, muscle, etc.
  • I have been at this since october and have gone through several plateau periods.
    Dont give up and up the intake on your calories!

    :?p
  • I don't feel like I'm starving myself, though, at all. I'm just not hungry (and often force myself to eat even then). When I'm not eating unhealthy foods, there is just not enough calories in healthy ones, lol. I could easily make up the calories by having a cheesesteak for dinner instead of a chicken breast and broccoli, and make up the calories, but that seems....not to be the right thing to do, lol. Should I be forcing myself to eat when I'm really not hungry?

    And like I said, I drink a TON of water--20-30 cups per day. I know I have alot of sodium (something else I am working on) but I feel like that much water should negate it. Also, I'm not discouraged about the progress/lack thereof, but that it is going backwards despite me trying harder than ever this week to do it right.

    Maybe if you cut back on your water you will be able to eat a little more. When I am hungry and it isn't time for me to eat yet...I drink water. So maybe you are drinking too much!
  • merrillfoster
    merrillfoster Posts: 855 Member
    Haha, please note: I'm not upset about 7 lbs--if it had stayed like that, even if I hadn't gone down, I would be happy (and at that point I could see a difference. Now I look like I did before). I'm upset that despite working even harder since then (b/c it was extremely motivating), I've gone up. So I'm at a 5lb loss, and 0 inch loss. That is frustrating.

    As far as calories go, I understand what everyone is saying, but I feel as though when I'm looking at the food and trying to convince myself I want it and STILL can't, my body really just doesn't want it. I'm not like depriving myself (well I am in the sense that I've traded cucumber slices for cheetos and turkey sandwiches for cheesesteaks, but, again, that seems like ti should be a good thing, lol).

    Also, for those who said drink less water--again, I'm not forcing myself to drink this much. I like it. And shouldn't it flush out any excess sodium (from things like canned soups)?

    PS: I appreciate all the support--thanks guys!
  • SarahSmileyGirl
    SarahSmileyGirl Posts: 2 Member
    Don't beat your self up over 2lbs and through in the towel after only 3 weeks. Try not to focus so much on the numbers on the scale since everyones weight fluctuates a few pounds up or down. Try focusing on the health aspect of it and the lbs will come off in the long run if you stick with it. Diet should be a lifestyle change not just a short term fix to loose extra weight from poor eating habits and lack of physical activity. Also you need more than 3 weeks to see a real difference in inches lost.

    Oh and 20+ glasses of water just seems a bit excessive since you only need 8.
  • Janworkingitout
    Janworkingitout Posts: 434 Member
    Please don't give up! I went 5 weeks without losing a single pound or inch! I still felt terrific and loved the way I felt eating right and exercising. Maybe you should give up the scale for a while. I stopped weighing myself for about 3 weeks and when I went back to weigh ins I had lost 4 pounds. Seriously, do not obsess over what the scale says...are you healthier, do you feel better, how are you clothes fitting, those are some of the things that you should consider.
  • JillyCornwall
    JillyCornwall Posts: 376 Member
    No No you won't FLUSH out the salt from the foods only dilute them...and the acids that digest them.....if only it was that easy...but you will flush out a lot of the vitamins and minerals because your body won't be able to digest them. Why change cheerios for cucumber??? Wholegrain cheerios are fine for breakfast especially when you are under your calories. Cucumber is just water..yet again..its an additive to a salad meal..not a meal. C'mon you rweally do have to change your mind set..otherwise you are not going to be ABLE to keep this up.
  • benitocereno
    benitocereno Posts: 101 Member
    "I like eating this little and drinking this much, I'm not forcing myself, therefor it is fine."

    Excuses... you wanted advice and you got it! I know this sounds a little blunt, but deal with it and take the advice.

    Keep it up, three weeks is NOTHING. How long did it take you to put on the weight?
  • MHW22
    MHW22 Posts: 10 Member
    OK - here's the deal ... In December I weighed myself and I was 204 ... - yep - 2 - 0 - 4... That is a Faaaaaaaar cry from the 150 I weighed when my husband and I were dating :( ... so in December I decided to start STARVING myself - and I lost 4lbs ...

    The 2nd week in January, I decided that OBVIOUSLY whatever I was doing was NOT the answer, bc after 4 weeks - 4lbs - REALLY?!?!?

    SOOOOOO ... after re-evaluating things, I determined it was time to change things up and instead to set myself "an attainable goal" ... I decided on a goal of 2lbs a week ... just trying to be realistic!!!

    I joined on here, went to the library - checked out SEVERAL different books on diets & cookbooks - went home, reviewed them all and decided which one I thought was actually DO-ABLE ... the 3-hour diet cookbook is the one I liked the best. He told me why - how - and when - it all made since (- and the recipes are cool too :) ...

    Since I have joined on Jan 20th I have lost 6lbs!!! - and Im EATING all the time - really eating!!!!
    I have started walking too btw - at least 2 miles a day. ( My kids are so active that I only get to walk on my breaks/lunch so I walk 1/2 mile (7min) at each 15 min break and at least a mile (16-17 min) during my hour lunch ... that leaves me plenty of time to warm food and eat.

    The biggest piece of advice I can give you is to EAT BREAKFAST - with in the first hour you get up!!! This sets your metabolism going for the rest of the day ... eat again at 10 (100 cal snack) - eat again at 12 - and again at 3 (100 cal snack) - eat dinner (have another snack around 5:30 if you will be eating after 6pm) ... treat yourself to a desert afterwards (120cal max) ... after all - you have done a great job ALL DAY!!! :D ... I eat all this and STILL end up 100 - 150 calories UNDER a day ... Eat - eat - eat ! Just make good choices!!

    Good luck!
  • thedeegan4
    thedeegan4 Posts: 422 Member
    3 week and you're giving up? Really, are you serious??? Do you know how long some of us have been at this? I'm going on 3 years now. My mom, she has been at this for at least 10 years. You didn't put it on overnight and it's not coming off overnight. There are no magic tricks or pills or anything that make it go faster. If there were, don't you think everyone here would be skinny and not need this website???

    Ok, that's my tough love for the day. Now, for the support, don't give up. Reassess the foods and things that you are putting into your body. Are you getting enough? Too much? If you don't eat at least the 1200 calories, then you aren't eating enough. Your body needs those calories otherwise it thinks it's being deprived and goes into starvation mode.
  • manymuses
    manymuses Posts: 162 Member
    I understand your frustration, but not the question "why bother trying?" How much is your life worth to you?

    I was just released from the hospital yesterday after having an emergency heart catheterization at age 43. I had to say goodbye to my 2 small sobbing children this week (thinking I might possibly never see them again.) I came out of the procedure just fine but know that I now have absolutely no choice but to bother trying. It's my one wild and precious life and it is worth trying for.
    There were literally thousands of heart patients lined up at the hospital, waiting for surgery to save their lives, many of whom have given up and stopped trying. Consider the alternative to not trying. Nothing like facing death to make you value life.

    Do not give up. Fight for your life. Keep going. Keep trying. It WILL work. Please give yourself another chance. I have at least 100 pounds still to lose, but I cannot give up. I have too much to live for and so do you.
  • JeanK56
    JeanK56 Posts: 76
    Don't give up. It did not take three weeks to put the weight on...it will not come off in three weeks. Briefly read some of the other posts before replying and if you are not eating enough calories after burning off your calories you will not lose weight.
  • superwmn
    superwmn Posts: 936
    Is it your TOM? I gain 4-8lbs during TOM.

    DON'T GIVE UP! We're in this forever. The time will pass anyway and you can make choices that will lead to health or make choices that will support your former lifestyle. Little changes every day forever.

    YOU CAN DO THIS!!! WE'RE ALL HERE FOR YOU!!!

    Charmagne
  • I have been feeling similar. I've been tracking my foods and exercise for 4 weeks and haven't lost a single lb. Starting to think maybe my thyroid is acting up or something :/ Very discouraging.

    That being said, I agree with everyone else. Just keep at it and eventually your scale will move again. AND for sure eat more, or at least have a snack a couple times a day to get your calories up higher. Have a yogurt or an apple or some veggies, just have something!

    4313404.png
    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Nutrition Facts For Foods
  • christy_frank
    christy_frank Posts: 680 Member
    I started gaining weight back around the 2 week mark because I had my eating down, or so I thought. I was starving myself and I gained back 2 lbs, with only 3 days of my NET calories being UNDER 1200. I started researching and talking to people on MFP and I changed my goals to 1400/day and I started making sure that my NET was kept around 1400 calories. I immediately started eating more, even when I wasnt hungry, I eat somethign almost every 2 hours until dinner. Nuts are my new best friend!!! Since I turned it around and started eating MORE calories, I started losing again. I have lost 0.5 lbs every day since Monday. I gained almost 1 lb per day starving myself though. I am almost back to where I was a week ago.

    Friend me.... we can help motivate each other to eat more.... LOL

    I know - eat more, lose weight, eat less, gain weight. It just SEEMS wrong, but it is true! :happy:
  • christy_frank
    christy_frank Posts: 680 Member
    I understand your frustration, but not the question "why bother trying?" How much is your life worth to you?

    I was just released from the hospital yesterday after having an emergency heart catheterization at age 43. I had to say goodbye to my 2 small sobbing children this week (thinking I might possibly never see them again.) I came out of the procedure just fine but know that I now have absolutely no choice but to bother trying. It's my one wild and precious life and it is worth trying for.
    There were literally thousands of heart patients lined up at the hospital, waiting for surgery to save their lives, many of whom have given up and stopped trying. Consider the alternative to not trying. Nothing like facing death to make you value life.

    Do not give up. Fight for your life. Keep going. Keep trying. It WILL work. Please give yourself another chance. I have at least 100 pounds still to lose, but I cannot give up. I have too much to live for and so do you.


    OMG!!!! THANK YOU FOR SHARING!!!
  • I agree with a lot of these posts, don't give up. You have to make sure your eating the right amount of calories, but remember if you hit a plato in change up your fitness routeen. Try something new, add more weight something. The fitness people are all saying that you have to keep challanging yourself in new ways to keep seeing results. 3 weeks is a good time to mix it up. Keep going.
  • meggonkgonk
    meggonkgonk Posts: 2,066 Member

    As far as calories go, I understand what everyone is saying, but I feel as though when I'm looking at the food and trying to convince myself I want it and STILL can't, my body really just doesn't want it. I'm not like depriving myself (well I am in the sense that I've traded cucumber slices for cheetos and turkey sandwiches for cheesesteaks, but, again, that seems like ti should be a good thing, lol).

    Also, for those who said drink less water--again, I'm not forcing myself to drink this much. I like it. And shouldn't it flush out any excess sodium (from things like canned soups)?

    PS: I appreciate all the support--thanks guys!

    I don't think you are quite listening to what people are telling you- you have cut down food and upped water so much, that your body isn't focused on sending you "EAT" messages- It's concentrating on not falling apart. 20-30 cups of water will put a strain on your liver, it is TOO much. You have swung from one extreme to another, one that is just as unhealthy and is making you unhealthy to boot.

    Here is a break down of approximately what your cals should look like BEFORE exercise. If you burn a lot, each meal should increase a bit:
    Breakfast: 250- 350 cals
    Lunch:300-500 cals
    Dinner: 500-600 cals
    Snacks(combined): 120-550

    Cheese, nuts, avacados, oils- all of these are good an necessary parts of your diet. Try not to go so extreme and I bet you will feel less like you are "bothering" and more like you are living.
  • meggonkgonk
    meggonkgonk Posts: 2,066 Member
    Also- cucumbers are calorically useless-- not unlike water in veggie form; try something with nutritional value like carrots or grape tomatoes or peas.
  • gibbsgirl
    gibbsgirl Posts: 72 Member
    First of all I agree that you are over-drinking water. It's making you full. Second of all, when I work out I have noooo problem eating all my calories! Working out isn't just for losing weight. Your eating habits and the calories you take in help to lose weight. The exercise is to keep your body healthy and to keep things where they belong. So eat your exercise calories because your body needs that fuel. A serving of nuts will easily get your calories up. My favorite snack is an apple (70 cals) and 2 tablespoons of melted peanut butter (180 cals).
  • Mkleder
    Mkleder Posts: 289
    Given that we are talking about 2 lbs and 3 weeks, there could easily be another factor here that folks haven't raised yet. You know who.

    Just a few weeks ago I was frustrated to tears because the scale had gone back up even though I was sticking to the plan. No more than two days later, I woke up to "Oh, you again." Once that had passed, I mysteriously dropped 3.5 lbs -- which kept me on track with my goal of 2 lbs a week.

    This week I hit the same roadblock even though I had some time off work and kicked in a couple extra hours of cardio. Before I let myself get all wound up and reach for cream-on-the-carb, I looked at the calendar.

    Make the suggested adjustments in your calorie intake that others have mentioned, but also keep in mind that we are women and we are just going to have those bad weeks.

    DON'T GIVE UP!
  • stormieweather
    stormieweather Posts: 2,549 Member
    Let me show you something:

    deficitgraph.jpg


    See that light blue line? That is my cumulative weight loss based on daily weighings. Now look at the 25th? It was WAY down there at 5.6 pounds lost, but the very next day, it jumped back up where it should have been. The green highlights are how many pounds I should have lost based on my deficit-cumulative. If you notice, in spite of all the jumping around my actual weight does, the bottom line is right where it should be, based on my deficit within 1 day +/-.

    Fact...it takes a 3500 calorie deficit to lose 1 pound. There is no way around that. You can lose water weight, you can gain waste weight or have undigested food in your belly or retain fluids, but still....until you've reached a 3500 calorie deficit, you cannot lose a pound of true bodyweight.

    Don't try to cut those calories too fast, it is mentally difficult and physically painful to deprive yourself so greatly. After a few weeks, one gives up (see your post title). Your hunger hormones will eventually take control and you will binge, undoing all the hard work. So eat enough to fuel your body and so that you can enjoy life. Hang in there (don't give up, because where will you be if you do?)
  • Yes everyone saying to you don't give up are correct, this process will not happen overnight . in fact at some point it will probably get much much more difficult to lose the weight ,when you are farther along closer to your goal weight ,but you have to remember that everything your doing right now is so much better for you then what you were doing .losing the weight is of course the ultimate goal and its whats constantly on your mind, but don't forget about your health being greatly benefited by this I'm sure you feel much better than you did before you started. so hang in there .hope these are encouraging words for you good luck

    and p.s i would cut back to half your body weight in oz in water per day example 200 lb. 100 oz. of water this might help
  • ymachick
    ymachick Posts: 33 Member
    Hey now. Don't give up after just three weeks. I've been on MFP since early December and I've lost 15 pounds. I, like you, am doing 'everything I'm supposed to do' -- P90X 4 or 5 days a week, low carbs, low calories, and it's worked great...EXCEPT for the past two weeks I've haven't moved the scale down. In fact, I weighed in a pound MORE today! Yikes!

    Want to know what my nutritionist said?

    I'm replacing fat with muscle, which weighs more, and I'm retaining some water. (They have a machine that measures all that in your body-it's very cool). I admitted that my close are baggy and I'm seeing great toning and definition, but still my brain and emotions get caught up on that stupid number on the scale.

    Don't get so caught up on the number on the scale. I know how that is because I'm guilty of it myself. If you are truly doing all the things you said in your post, don't sweat it, the results will come. Everyone is different so while someone else might see results quickly, others don't. It depends on age, metabolism, exercise, diet and DNA.

    Good luck on your journey. I think I speak for all of us when I say I hope to continue to see you on the posts. :)
  • The reason I have always failed in the past was because I also said "Why bother?"
    But this time it's going to be different for me - because I'm not on a diet - I have changed my lifestyle.
    This week I have exercised for 350 minutes with a total of 1918 calories burned. I went out for a meal with my husband and some friends (a very rare treat) and today I ate a small piece of cake at work (somebody's birthday). I suspect I haven't lost a great deal this week - tomorrow is weigh day for me - and to be honest I don't care what the scales say. I'm feeling good and I feel fitter. I know I still have weight to lose - but this time I know I'm going to get there and I'm not going to give up.

    Please don't give up on yourself - you really are worth the effort and we will all help and nag you to death through the hard bits! :wink:
  • 305muscle
    305muscle Posts: 97 Member
    So I've been at this just over 3 weeks--trying to make better food choices, exercising every day (maybe 1 or 2 days off in that time, every other day I did SOMETHING), watching my calories, etc. I've even started forcing myself to eat breakfast.

    It's just not working. It worked briefly--I had lost 7 lbs at my 'peak' (about a week ago), and now, despite the fact that lately I have been working harder than ever since then (since that was a really motivating weigh-in)/watching my food intake more closely than ever (even the rare 'bad' food I have factored in, calorie wise), and I've gained 2lbs back and lost 0 inches. 0. What's the point? I drink a TON of water (20+ glasses/day), am down from like 10 sodas/day to 1 a week, down from a bottle of wine a night to a glass or two a night or two a week (with the calories factored in). I no longer eat mac and cheese as a major food group. I know I still eat the occasional lean cuisine or canned soup (yes, sodium, I know, but I feel like I drink enough water that that should be moot), but I've been making much more of my own food (less sodium/preservatives/processing/whatever else). My diet is no longer strictly carbs. I feel like I'm trying really hard and getting no results. 0. If anything, I'm getting the opposite. I'm so frustrated.

    I'd be fine if I was weighing the same but losing inches, but when NOTHING is changing--what's the point? I enjoy diet coke, wine, cheesesteaks and mac and cheese. If it makes no difference either way, why bother trying?
    QUIT!!QUIT!!QUIT!! go drink a soda and eat a pizza j/k sometimes you gotta tell people to quit to make them do the opposite
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