ha ha

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memaw66
memaw66 Posts: 2,558 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Hey, I haven't seen
you in a while. What happened? You look terrible."

"What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fineBartender: "What about the wooden leg? You didn't have that before."

Pirate: "'Well, we were in a battle and I got hit with a cannon ball,
but I'm fine now."

Bartender: "Well, okay, but what about that hook? What happened to
your hand?"

Pirate: "'We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a
sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook. I'm fine,
really."

Bartender: "What about that eye patch?"

Pirate: "Oh, one day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. I
looked up and one of them sh** in my eye."

"You're kidding," said the bartender, "you lost an eye just from bird
sh**."

Pirate: "Arg, it was the first day I had me hook."

Replies

  • memaw66
    memaw66 Posts: 2,558 Member
    Options
    A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Hey, I haven't seen
    you in a while. What happened? You look terrible."

    "What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fineBartender: "What about the wooden leg? You didn't have that before."

    Pirate: "'Well, we were in a battle and I got hit with a cannon ball,
    but I'm fine now."

    Bartender: "Well, okay, but what about that hook? What happened to
    your hand?"

    Pirate: "'We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a
    sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook. I'm fine,
    really."

    Bartender: "What about that eye patch?"

    Pirate: "Oh, one day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. I
    looked up and one of them sh** in my eye."

    "You're kidding," said the bartender, "you lost an eye just from bird
    sh**."

    Pirate: "Arg, it was the first day I had me hook."
  • kimford28
    kimford28 Posts: 320
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    That was a good one!
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
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    :laugh: :laugh: That's funny!
  • memaw66
    memaw66 Posts: 2,558 Member
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    Panda walks into a bar and orders some food. The bartender serves him and the panda eats. Once the panda finishes his meal he walks up to the bartender and shoots him. As the panda is leaving the bar the bartender shouts after him, "Why did you shoot me?" The panda yells back, "I'm a panda. Look it up." Bartender consults his trusty encyclopedia and finds an entry on pandas. The text says: Pandas: Eats shoots and leaves

    funny-pictures-panda-will-let-you-take-the-bamboo.jpg
  • memaw66
    memaw66 Posts: 2,558 Member
    Options
    Panda walks into a bar and orders some food. The bartender serves him and the panda eats. Once the panda finishes his meal he walks up to the bartender and shoots him. As the panda is leaving the bar the bartender shouts after him, "Why did you shoot me?" The panda yells back, "I'm a panda. Look it up." Bartender consults his trusty encyclopedia and finds an entry on pandas. The text says: Pandas: Eats shoots and leaves

    Sorry, posted twice!!!!
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
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    :laugh: :laugh: Funny!

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