I WANNA BE A LOSER TOOO!!!!

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:cry: I need to vent!! This will prolly sound like a bunch of mumbo jumbo but it will make me feel better!!! I am an 18 year old Army wife, with a 17 mo. old child!! I am always surrounded by all of the military people who look at me like a cow, becuase I am not as fit, and tone as them!! My husband who is struggling himself to stay in shape within the miltiary guildines isnt much help because we both just sit around and bash on ourselves about how we are unhealthy, and not in shape, yet we have this stupid addiction to food!!! My goal is to go from 164 to 130-35, which is my pre pregnancy weight!! It seems as if tho its going to take a miracle!! I sit at home all day as a stay at home mom, then when my husband gets off work i go work out at the gym, I just started earlier this week , because i am tired of not loving myself, and feeling as if they world looks at me different because of my weight!! I was always the athletic one, playing sports since i was 4, what happened. How did i let myself get this way!! I just recently went clothes shopping on post, NOTHING FIT ME, i cant even count the times i broke down into tears!! and it doesnt help because we are stationed in SOUTH KOREA where all of these asians make me feel unexcepted because its in their genes to be a size 0-2!!! UGHHH... I dont want to be this way anymore... I AM GOING TO DO THIS!! my whole life my mother and family bashed me for not being as tone as everyone else, why have i let it go this far!! I am a very self concious, very down on myself, and I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!! :mad: :explode: :mad: I need more motiviation and help to reach my goal, but i feel as if no one understands me!! "your not fat, your a mom", "you just had a baby" (17 months ago), "your beautiful no matter what"... I cant take it,, its not that easy people!! AHHHHHHH

all you out there who have reached your goals, i am very proud of you, i am a bout to break, this is so much harder than i thought, i always prided myself on not being addicted to anything, till now, I know i am addicted to FOOD!! its so hard being upset, because all i want to turn to is food!! blah.. what can i do? any suggestions? PLEASE SOMEONE!! HELP!!

Replies

  • McKnightAM
    McKnightAM Posts: 125 Member
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    :cry: I need to vent!! This will prolly sound like a bunch of mumbo jumbo but it will make me feel better!!! I am an 18 year old Army wife, with a 17 mo. old child!! I am always surrounded by all of the military people who look at me like a cow, becuase I am not as fit, and tone as them!! My husband who is struggling himself to stay in shape within the miltiary guildines isnt much help because we both just sit around and bash on ourselves about how we are unhealthy, and not in shape, yet we have this stupid addiction to food!!! My goal is to go from 164 to 130-35, which is my pre pregnancy weight!! It seems as if tho its going to take a miracle!! I sit at home all day as a stay at home mom, then when my husband gets off work i go work out at the gym, I just started earlier this week , because i am tired of not loving myself, and feeling as if they world looks at me different because of my weight!! I was always the athletic one, playing sports since i was 4, what happened. How did i let myself get this way!! I just recently went clothes shopping on post, NOTHING FIT ME, i cant even count the times i broke down into tears!! and it doesnt help because we are stationed in SOUTH KOREA where all of these asians make me feel unexcepted because its in their genes to be a size 0-2!!! UGHHH... I dont want to be this way anymore... I AM GOING TO DO THIS!! my whole life my mother and family bashed me for not being as tone as everyone else, why have i let it go this far!! I am a very self concious, very down on myself, and I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!! :mad: :explode: :mad: I need more motiviation and help to reach my goal, but i feel as if no one understands me!! "your not fat, your a mom", "you just had a baby" (17 months ago), "your beautiful no matter what"... I cant take it,, its not that easy people!! AHHHHHHH

    all you out there who have reached your goals, i am very proud of you, i am a bout to break, this is so much harder than i thought, i always prided myself on not being addicted to anything, till now, I know i am addicted to FOOD!! its so hard being upset, because all i want to turn to is food!! blah.. what can i do? any suggestions? PLEASE SOMEONE!! HELP!!
  • nillasillygurly
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    ok u doing awesome right now bc u know why??? u are admitting to this so called food addiction u say that u have acquired.... and going to the gym...that is some effort gurl. atleast u have realised this b4 it got too bad...as in for example me...ive been big my whole entire life...Thanks mom! But now that i am almost 23 I have told myself that i need to take control. Instead of looking at food as comfort from a hard day or something to do from boredom you look at it as say life...u have to eat to live. so instead of eating for boredom you find something else to occupy ur time...say drink water and wait five minutes and u are really hungry EAT and portion is everything if u need a weight loss buddy email me....and not to sound werid u are beautiful and imagine when u are at ur goal weight how much healthier u will feel.
  • Gator4RTR
    Gator4RTR Posts: 119 Member
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    I feel for ya RME...but you can overcome this. You will have the weight off in no time and you will be strutting your stuff in front of your hubby and the other Army wives saying "How ya like me now!!" :tongue:

    I too am a recovering victim of the Army's "Fat Boy" program. I struggled with my weight my whole career and is one of the reasons I decided to leave the service. The standards, in my opinion, are too harsh but I also see the reasons for the standards. So I know what your hubby is going through too.

    So instead of beating each other up...you need to be helping each other so you can both benefit from the weight loss. You need to try and block out all the negativity that is surrounding you and focus on you, otherwise you will never get a fair chance to lose the weight. So take walks together around post. Develop a fitness program that will work for you while you are home with your child. When you go to the gym, see if there are services available with a trainer that are inexpensive or even free.

    Hang in there, kid!! You will overcome this. :smile: Need to vent? Gimme me a hollar :flowerforyou:
  • TNTPete
    TNTPete Posts: 701 Member
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    Have you thought of this -- turn your addiction into a positive. Research healthy recipes, try new vegetables and snack options -- become annoyingly aware of everything you put in your mouth. It is empowerment when you know a healthier way to make something. Check out the recipes area.

    We all have our crosses to bear -- you can do this and you can be the envy not the envious if you so choose.

    Hang in there -- your goal can be reality if you trust in yourself, give eachother support and just keep on pressing. Good Luck!!
  • Katy009
    Katy009 Posts: 579 Member
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    :cry: I need to vent!! This will prolly sound like a bunch of mumbo jumbo but it will make me feel better!!! I am an 18 year old Army wife, with a 17 mo. old child!! I am always surrounded by all of the military people who look at me like a cow, becuase I am not as fit, and tone as them!! My husband who is struggling himself to stay in shape within the miltiary guildines isnt much help because we both just sit around and bash on ourselves about how we are unhealthy, and not in shape, yet we have this stupid addiction to food!!! My goal is to go from 164 to 130-35, which is my pre pregnancy weight!! It seems as if tho its going to take a miracle!! I sit at home all day as a stay at home mom, then when my husband gets off work i go work out at the gym, I just started earlier this week , because i am tired of not loving myself, and feeling as if they world looks at me different because of my weight!! I was always the athletic one, playing sports since i was 4, what happened. How did i let myself get this way!! I just recently went clothes shopping on post, NOTHING FIT ME, i cant even count the times i broke down into tears!! and it doesnt help because we are stationed in SOUTH KOREA where all of these asians make me feel unexcepted because its in their genes to be a size 0-2!!! UGHHH... I dont want to be this way anymore... I AM GOING TO DO THIS!! my whole life my mother and family bashed me for not being as tone as everyone else, why have i let it go this far!! I am a very self concious, very down on myself, and I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!! :mad: :explode: :mad: I need more motiviation and help to reach my goal, but i feel as if no one understands me!! "your not fat, your a mom", "you just had a baby" (17 months ago), "your beautiful no matter what"... I cant take it,, its not that easy people!! AHHHHHHH

    all you out there who have reached your goals, i am very proud of you, i am a bout to break, this is so much harder than i thought, i always prided myself on not being addicted to anything, till now, I know i am addicted to FOOD!! its so hard being upset, because all i want to turn to is food!! blah.. what can i do? any suggestions? PLEASE SOMEONE!! HELP!!

    Wow, I really feel for you! How long have you been in South Korea? I can ABSOLUTELY relate because when my baby was 4 months old we moved back to my husband's home, Italy. It was so stressful to be in a different country with a language I didn't speak, a brand new baby, and, even Italians are small in nature, so NONE of the clothes fit me unless I bought all the XLs, which half of those didn't even fit (in the US I'm a size 8/10....here XL - lol).

    The only thing I can say is that you have to try to not let it get you down because you will go in the wrong direction. I put on 6 KG (13 lbs) in the 7 years that we have been here and I attribute it to all the stress and being a stay-at-home-mom during the first 4 years. Although I was extremely happy to be home with my daughter and LOVED it, It was really loney because I didn't know anyone, couldn't have a normal conversation because of the language barier, and I got really depressed. Now I'm back to work and trying to get myself back in shape. I just wish I would have done it sooner, but I just think the stress overtook everything.

    I know that probably doesn't help you at all, but I wish you the best of luck. If you ever need anything, you can send me a msg! :smile:

    Katy
  • iftcheiaf
    iftcheiaf Posts: 960 Member
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    You know what the greatest incentive is, even above how other people look at you? It's the wonderful example you're going to set for your baby while being in the habit of being healthy. It is hard when we compare ourselves either to what other people think we should look like or what WE think other people think about us. But as your little one starts running and playing...and evening making his/her own food choices, you'll start seeing your inspiration right there. So keep up the good work. You're off to a great start. Results never happen as quickly as we would like them to, but when they do happen, WATCH OUT!!! You'll continue doing great. :wink:
  • rheston
    rheston Posts: 638
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    I spent most of my adult life in the military and came up through the ranks so I do appreciate where you're coming from. The biggest stumbling block in getting started is having a positive, can do attitude about yourself and your goals. Don't look too far ahead of yourself keeping your goals to one night at a time.

    Are you using the Post gym? If so, there may be instructors who can help you work on routines if not that then maybe a group that gets together a few nights a week that you can join and be mutually supportive.

    Like it has been pointed out you're on the right path by identifying and facing up to your situation and starting to take control of it. It really is an attitude change away from habits that seem to form quickly after marriage and even more quickly with the addition of an infant into the picture. Nobody every prepared me for all that I see you facing right now but know that you're a survivor, as my wife and I are, and you are really doing the right things now.

    Good Luck!
  • Ezzie
    Ezzie Posts: 665 Member
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    Rheston.....well said!! Attitude is one of the biggest either hurdles or helpers! I'ts finding those positive people who will listen to you vent then pick you up, dust you off and say..'let's go and...." whatever will burn those calories!!

    RME...with this group to support you you have a great start, just keep coming back here when you need the motivation!!!

    Hugs to you,
    Ez
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
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    Hey there!

    All I can say is I COMPLETELY understand how you feel. And you just want to wave a magic wand and have the weight be off. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way. However, starting your journey towards a new lifestyle will lead you to your goal weight much faster than you think if you just do it.

    Just take it a week at a time. I feel like a broken record because I say that so often! But for me, it helped so much to not put SO much pressure on myself. I started to make one small change after another. Not stressing myself out, not putting so much on myself that I felt overwhelmed....I just did it. And I can honestly say this is the FIRST time in my life I have not felt tempted even ONCE to cheat or to quit. The reason for that is because I am doing this in a smart, slow, healthy way. I haven't felt deprived. I don't get bored. I am doing something I can do the rest of my life.

    Just get started and focus on the present and future...no more dwelling on the past or the shouda, couda, woudas. :) Get going and you will GET there!

    Hang in there!!
    -Tami
  • I hear yer RME, I too love my food.

    However like others have suggest turn it into something else.

    I love curry, any type, Indian, Thai, dont care i love em. Used to by all sorts of cooking sauces, even had takeways on a weekly basis.

    This ofcourse piles the pounds on.

    You know what i did? I sat there one day watching Gordon Ramsey on TV and he made this really simple Thai Curry. I wrote the ingrediants down, and went to my local Tesco and made myself a curry. I used all fresh ingrediants and you know what? It was awesome. the best curry i ever had. Partly probably because i had made my own curry.

    It was probably also a billion calories lower too than the takeaway kind. Infact my otherhalf got a takeaway the other day with her friend, I had a mouth full of it and was nearly sick of the bland taste of it.

    Thats the first step for me to a healthier lifestyle, make what you love and what your addicted too, into something that is good for you. Hope this helps : ) Good luck to yer
  • McKnightAM
    McKnightAM Posts: 125 Member
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    :happy: Thanks to all of you, and your encouraging words!! It just goes to show, that your not the only one!! I appreciate everything you guys said, some even made me laugh!! :laugh:

    I will keep in there, and anytime i need the support i cant get anywhere else.. YOU'LL BE HEARING FROM ME!!