My friend the personal trainer.....HELP!

cindyf14 · February 2011

Ok so my friend is a personal trainer, still finishing up her schooling but already taking on clients and doing classes at fitness center and all. Anyways, I asked her to help me out as I've been working out and using this site for about 4 weeks now and actually gained weight. I need to loose 100+. I never over ate prior to this, just ate the wrong things and after tracking my food on here, not eating enough things. Well since I've been using this site I've been very careful as to what I eat, I did loose 3" so far in my waist and my blood pressure dropped drastically. Ok so now bring in my friend to the equation. She wants me on a strick diet watching my protein and carbs, also gave me a list of the approved foods I can eat and seperated them out into protein/carbs/fruits that kind of thing. However, I seriously can NOT eat anything that is not on that list. Nothing out of a can, nothing out of a box, no pork at all nothing that is processed basically. Which for the most part I can do, oh and did I mention no bread and no dairy. Ok this is SO very different than what I've been used to for 30+yrs. Am I trying it? You bet! But, is this a realistic diet? How can I do this when I have to cook something totally different for my family than what I'm eating. I also have to eat 6 times a day, which I agree I don't eat enough. I'm not talking huge portions here just normal small portions of a protein/carb or veggie and no fruit after 2pm.

Ok so now onto the exercise. I was doing cardio 5-6 days a week with my weight training every other day. She has me doing 3 times a week cardio(and I better be sweating she said). And upper body 1 day lower body next then rest 3rd day and continue on like that. Is that enough cardio though for me. I need to loose alot of weight!

I want to do this right. I don't want to drastically loose 50lbs in a month, I want it to be slow and steady and learn how to eat right, but not eat all organic cuz trust me that is what she is leaning towards for me as she eats like that. I'm just confused, not sure what I should do.

00trayn · February 2011

I started working with a personal trainer at the gym last month and I've realized that some of the info is useful... and some isn't so much. Yes, losing weight is the focus but there's no point if you can't keep up the change! I've lost all my weight by just cutting back and making better choices. Does that mean I haven't touched ice cream, cupcakes, frozen premade meals, or bread in a year? Heck no! I'd never make it more than a few weeks without any of that. But I do log it when I eat it and make sure I'm under my calories. I wouldn't throw all her advice out, but take it in context of what you can keep up to stay healthy once you lose weight. That's more important that quickly dropping to a low weight and gaining it back when you start to eat "normally" again. Just redefine what normal is.

As for working out, it won't hurt to workout every day. I did that for the first year, now I'm working out a bit less (more like 4-5 days instead of 6 days a week) but doing more intense workouts. I think doing some form of exercise every day (with a rest day once a week) would be beneficial for you. Just have a variety in what you do and how intense you do it. You don't want to get too exhausted and burn out (like I did a bit).

naomihandler · February 2011

Is she a nutritionist also? I know that many personal trainers do not have the training or education to give out a food plan. I think you would be better off meeting with a dietition or asking your doctor about the food part of this plan. I know that I could not follow that plan and I know that when something seems really impossible to me I tend to wimp out. You definately need a more realistic food plan. Good Luck!!!

fitnesspirateninja · February 2011

Your friend may tell you that if you want her to help you, then you have to do it her way. And if you don't think it's realistic for you to make these dramatic changes right away, then maybe she's not the right person to train you.

For me, it's easier to make gradual, realistic changes in my life. I started out slow, cutting out soda and taking short walks. Now I am on a pretty healthy diet and taking long walks. I'm still working to make changes. I'm not where I want to be exercise-wise. But I want these changes to last a lifetime, not just six months.

I'm sure that people are going to come on here and tell you that you're not "committed" enough to healthy living. Don't pay them any mind. Obviously, you're committed - you've lost three inches already!

I do think it's important to watch what you eat. I'm not saying that you should eat junk food and watch movies all day. However, if your friend's program isn't working for you, then it's not working. Keep in mind that she's still a student. She doesn't know everything, and she certainly doesn't know you better than you know yourself.

It sounds like you enjoyed your old routine. Maybe you want to do a modified program - incorporate some, but not all, of her suggestions into your life.

AggieCass09 · February 2011

Maybe talk to your friend and tell her the diet is unreasonable to you. If you cant maintain the diet for the long haul any weight you do lose will just come back on. Print out what you are eating and agree on small but manageable changes. I've slowly eliminated fast food, soda, meat, and high fructose corn syrup out of my diet over the past two years and feel great. However, if someone would have told me not to eat any of that cold turkey 2 years ago I would have put up the same post you just did! Your friend's exercise plan looks really great so mention that when speaking with her before asking how to compromise with the diet. Slow and steady wins the race!

Go Girlie!

angel2296 · February 2011

It sounds extreme to me, BUT why not try it for awhile and see if you get the results! Personally, I could not make that big of a change and expect it to stick. I would have to change one or two things at a time. Best wishes to you in whatever you decide!!

emmerrs · February 2011

Here's my take...

100 pounds is a lot to lose, and it's going to take some time, perseverance and really sustained motivation. If this diet your friend wants you to do seems close to impossible now, then how hard is it going to be to keep with it for months and months?

If it were me, I would tell your friend that you value his/her help and understand that the information they are giving you is good advice but that you just don't think its right for you at this point. Try something you see as more manageable and maybe integrate components of this other diet bit by bit.

Good Luck!

kappyblu · February 2011

Cindy, I know she's your friend, but please do what is right for you. In my opinion, unless you are planning on eating ONLY those foods on that list for the rest of your life, that is probably not the wisest way to go. Eating healthy and being successful at it allows for some wiggle room, too. I just think that it's not realistic to eat from a certain list forever. I have been on here for almost 6 months. I have lost 46 pounds so far and I eat pretty much whatever I want, just healthier versions of it. Example: ground turkey instead of ground beef, brown rice instead of white rice, etc. I account for everything and stay within my calories. I exercise and then eat those calories back. I am stronger, have more energy, and this is the way I plan on eating for the rest of my life.
I have four children, and we eat most of our meals together. I measure portions and figure out calories, that's how I do it.

Please please please only follow her plan if you are absolutely sure this is what you want to do. Don't do it because you may want to make her happy. I always used to say "yes" to people because I was afraid of them rejecting me. Maybe you could try again with MFP and make sure you eat all your calories, drink tons of water, and get plenty of rest?

I only say this because you sound unsure of what to do. I wish you the best. :flowerforyou:

mkrafick · February 2011

I was in the same boat - I use my next door neighbor as a personal trainer who is also realitively new.

I find with him, he works with my goals. I specifically told him:
1) If you make me too miserable, act like a drill seargent, or make it so I can't move fore 3 days - I'll quit.
2) I can give 3x a week to a gym for 1 hour
3) I can change my diet, but it can't be so radical that I can't eat with my family. I can augment what they eat - so if we cook spaghetti, I eat spaghetti (at a realistic portion), and then I add a side of fruit.

Then I asked if this is realistic.

HIs response is that if I radically change my habits too much - when I come off them, I will gain weight. He also said that by doing what I mentioned I will lose weight, but slower than someone who is going hard core.

And he is right - I have been doing this a year and have been losing an average of .5-1lb a week. I could lose more, but have to give more. So slow and steady is the pace.

I also realized that MFP is much more helpful with weight loss in my case. I augment MFP with what I learn from him, not the other way around.

spgabby86 · February 2011

Well you control the outcome...I made up my mind I would not do ANY DIETING PERIOD! That is not a lifestyle change that I want. I did COMMIT to EATING HEALTHIER using MFP to watch my calories EAT MORE fruits and veggies and drink plenty of WATER

Those strict diets are designed for you to lose quick, but can you keep it up and keep it off is the key??? For me no way :noway: I've read many things that say slow is good. I set weekly goals for myself...I knew I couldn't continue to eat the way I was eating with our without exercise, had to make changes, so I watch my portion size, eat more fruits and veggies pay attention to what I'm eating as it gets later in the day...and I NEVER GIVE UP...gain or loss I keep it moving...I workout about 5 times a week every now & then 6 times but I do rest at LEAST 1 day a week, but seem to do just as good with 2 day rest periods.

Most Personal Trainers will put you on a strict diet, that's why I stayed clear of them not knocking what they do, I'm just not going to make that a lifestyle change, so I don't waste my time nor theirs...now I've only been at this since Nov 18, 2010, but am proud of my progress...it's starting to show and I still have treated my self to Red Lobster a couple of times, Baskin Robins 1 time etc etc etc...I just don't do it ALL the time and EAT in moderation when I go to those places...try and focus on foods with the lowest calorie intake! Those or the things that have worked for me...as of today I'm down 15.4 lbs! :flowerforyou: :bigsmile:

jr1985 · February 2011

Why are you trying to loose weight (for the current diet plan?) Is it to look fabulous by Valentines Day? If so, you can do anything hard core for a couple of weeks to look great for an event... but if you are anything like me... after about a month of completely depriving yourself... you will be soooo tired of eating vegetables that you stop working out for a week and eat fast food every day, until your gained 5-10lbs in that week... If your goal is long term and not just for an even on this current plan, then it doesn't look like you can maintain it for very long... measure and log everything you eat... and if you want to have a piece of pizza every once in a while, have a piece of pizza...not a whole pizza... but a piece, log it and budget for it. If you know that you are going to go out to dinner at your favorite restaurant on Friday and will be over your calorie intake for that day... cut an extra 100 calories out of your diet each day for the rest of the week before. As far as the work out routine goes... I would try what she suggests... but if after trying it, if you feel like you can add more cardio, then add more cardio. Unfortunately weight loss is a marathon not a sprint.

velix · February 2011

I was in the same boat - I use my next door neighbor as a personal trainer who is also realitively new.

I find with him, he works with my goals. I specifically told him:
1) If you make me too miserable, act like a drill seargent, or make it so I can't move fore 3 days - I'll quit.
2) I can give 3x a week to a gym for 1 hour
3) I can change my diet, but it can't be so radical that I can't eat with my family. I can augment what they eat - so if we cook spaghetti, I eat spaghetti (at a realistic portion), and then I add a side of fruit.

Then I asked if this is realistic.

HIs response is that if I radically change my habits too much - when I come off them, I will gain weight. He also said that by doing what I mentioned I will lose weight, but slower than someone who is going hard core.

And he is right - I have been doing this a year and have been losing an average of .5-1lb a week. I could lose more, but have to give more. So slow and steady is the pace.

I also realized that MFP is much more helpful with weight loss in my case. I augment MFP with what I learn from him, not the other way around.

I wholeheartedly agree with this!

My trainer told me to work out at the pace I plan to maintain. It will be a slower pace than if I went all out and busted my butt 7x a week with a restricted diet - but he has had many clients do this, and once they reach their goal weight, stop training at the same rate as they lost, and gained back at least a portion of the weight.

So while sometimes I am sad I don't see big numbers, and my goal will probably take a year instead the desired 5 months, it will be at a maintainable rate.

This is what I would tell your friend if I were you

Good Luck!

cindyf14 · February 2011

Cindy, I know she's your friend, but please do what is right for you. In my opinion, unless you are planning on eating ONLY those foods on that list for the rest of your life, that is probably not the wisest way to go. Eating healthy and being successful at it allows for some wiggle room, too. I just think that it's not realistic to eat from a certain list forever. I have been on here for almost 6 months. I have lost 46 pounds so far and I eat pretty much whatever I want, just healthier versions of it. Example: ground turkey instead of ground beef, brown rice instead of white rice, etc. I account for everything and stay within my calories. I exercise and then eat those calories back. I am stronger, have more energy, and this is the way I plan on eating for the rest of my life.
I have four children, and we eat most of our meals together. I measure portions and figure out calories, that's how I do it.

Please please please only follow her plan if you are absolutely sure this is what you want to do. Don't do it because you may want to make her happy. I always used to say "yes" to people because I was afraid of them rejecting me. Maybe you could try again with MFP and make sure you eat all your calories, drink tons of water, and get plenty of rest?

I only say this because you sound unsure of what to do. I wish you the best. :flowerforyou:

See this is exactly what I was thinking and already doing but she would not listen. I don't want to eat like her or like she has me on for the rest of my life. I have already since starting this site, changed my eating habits. I do eat brown rice instead of white, I measure my sizes, I NEVER go over my calories and I eat the same things I make for my family just smaller portions. I don't cut out everything I've known for the past 30 yrs.

Like I said some of her information on nutrition I will use definitly. But for the most part I'm not going to follow her diet whole heartedly. Thanks everyone for your comments and support. I really need it!

sweebum · February 2011

I agree with the above. You're simply not going to be able to follow it long term. Changing your habits is great! Sticking on a regimen of those foods for 2 years (likely how long it will take to lose 100 lbs) will discourage you.

Personal trainers who have either always been "skinny" or healthy, have a hard time understanding our sturuggles.

In the end, it's what works for you! You have the right idea- you have to control portions and eat well MOST of the time. A lot of it is portion control. After all, our grandparents (who generally were not overweight back then) ate sugar, butter, red meat, full fat milk etc. and they were not even close to as overweight as society is today. In fact want a great low cal cookbook that tastes good? Use your grandmothers :laugh: We are overweight because we eat more and lose less, it's not magic.

You're on the right track, keep it up :drinker:

Sheila_KI · February 2011

Yes, when you work out you need to sweat. Yes, when you work out you need to mix up cardio and strength. You are making life style changes not temporary changes. Don't start by being too drastic. Look at your food diary. What changes do you want to make? Are you eating a lot of processed foods? They contain so much sodium. Diet foods - the less fat - the more sodium. I am learning to eat fresh foods. Not buying packaged food mixes at the grocery store. Cooking fresh or frozen vegetables. Adding more fresh fruit to my diet. Eating salads. Watching my portions. No - I am not dropping fast but I am changing my life. I am exercising and eating healthier. My body is becoming stronger.

My friend the personal trainer.....HELP!

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