Busy Mom

sohnshine · February 2011

I have no idea what to do... I am a mother of 3 (a teenager and 2 elementary aged), that works at a full time job. I don't know if it is just me making excuses, but it seems I can NOT make any time for myself. And losing weight is a priority that is on the side (not back) burner. I am the main person in everyone's life, that when I do have time to work out, I too exhusted to do anything. I am failing at this!!!!!!!+
I was walking at night, but the winter storms have stopped that from happening. But I was feeling selfish because I was taking time from my family to walk. I tried to take my children on walks with me. But it was stop/go, stop/go... and we'd only be out for a small amount a time.
I don't have money and time to spend at a gym or fitness program. And it's getting harder and harder to do concentrate on me. Am I the only one who is like this? I have no clue what to do? My husband, I love him. But he isn't helpful with this journey I am on. He tries, but he and the kids are in a routine in life and are healthy... they don't need a change.
What to do? Sorry I am sound as if I am complaining... I am just lost and frustrated at the cards I presently hold. I have tried to give them back to the dealer. But he keeps dealing them back to me.
Thank you for your time if you are reading this. Sorry to have ranted so much.... good luck with your goals!!!!
-T-

sassylilmama · February 2011

I wish I could give you an answer but I dont know either. I stay home with my kids and still feel like there is always someones need that goes before mine. I guess the point of this is to say you are not alone.

jennyjennbug · February 2011

Sweetheart I have two kids one with real bad ADHD but I am a stay at home mom and had hardly anytime with chasing and picking up after kids. So My husband went and bought the wii and we bought fitness games and my 5 and 8 year old loves to do it with me so I don't feel as guilty exercising any more because I am still spending time with them. It's just a suggestion but it is worth the try. And good luck on you weight loss journey.

janalayn · February 2011

You need to remember that taking care of yourself makes you MORE available for your family. I don't know what you do for a living but if you get breaks or a lunch hour, try walking for 10 to 15 minutes at work. I have an office job and sit most of the day. Everytime I have to get up and deliver something to another office I try to walk an extra few minutes just down the hallway. My kids are grown and I struggled with weight when they were little. I was a single mom and walked the parking lot of the apartment complex after I put them to bed -- just kept the baby monitor clipped to my hip. Good luck and don't give up. You are just as important as the people you are taking care of.

poisongirl6485 · February 2011

Get your husband to pack up the kids and go somewhere for an hour while you work out at home.

I feel you on lack of time to yourself. I have a 3 year old who's in preschool and an 8 month old, and I also work full time. My day consists of getting up at 730am, getting my preschooler off to school, caring for my 8 month old (and 3 year old once he comes back from school at 1130am), and then going to work at 530p til 2 am. Then I get to do it all over again the next day with 4-5 hours of sleep.

When my 8 month old naps, I've been doing a workout DVD at home. My 3 year old tries to work out with me, so it's pretty cute (and sets a good example for him).

angievaughn · February 2011

I am a busy mom too!! I have 4 kids...ages 14, twins are 11 and the baby is 4. I work full time outside the home and married.

Here is what I say.....I felt the same way you do!!.....that I was taking time away from them by working out.........

But here is the real truth...If I do not get healthy.....I will go from take 1 hour from them a day....to not being in their life anymore....and then they could spend the rest of thier life without me!!!

So, I say........start out by finding a workout walking video you can do at home......shut the door and work out for that 30 minutes to an hour.......make the time for yourself so that you can be in your children's life......for a very long time!!! After you work out you will find that you are happier and will do more with your children than you have in the past!!!

Friend me if you need to.....I can help in anyway I can!!!!

Mrs_McFadden · February 2011

I think most mothers can relate to this. I'm a SAHM with three kids..10,3 and 6 months. When you're a mother it's usually tough to do anything for yourself and we often find ourselves justifying it to our families as if we need their permission.
You are going to have to get hard core basically. Everyone in the family needs you? You need THEM.
I suggest you organize your family and delegate.
Examples, in case you aren't already doing things like this. I make my older kids gather their own laundry and separate it. Seems like such a small thing but hey that is 20 min less of you having to do it.
Pre plan your dinners, that's the most important meal and the one you spend with your family. So shop for it once a week with your kids helping.
I could go on and on but what I'm trying to get across is you might have a family meeting and call upon your family to support -you-. And tell them point blank: I'm not happy because I'm unhealthy. In order for me to be able to take care of myself I will need you to help sometimes, we will need to streamline things so I can get to a healthier body.

I used to work and take care of my kids and had a three hour commute. It is tough as hell. No way around that- but you just have to use your brain and be smarter about your time and also about not punishing yourself for taking the simple steps to taking better care of yourself. That is not a sacrifice of your family- you right now are being a martyr for them.

Mrs_McFadden · February 2011

Accidental double post

LaDiablesse · February 2011

I can totally relate being a Mom of 4 children all under 10. I know that guilty feeling. I try to exercise at least 3 times a week with videos. Sometimes my kids do it with me. There have been weeks where it wasn't possible due to homework, cooking and cleaning, school projects, etc... I make sure I stay under my calories, and definitely my sodium (which I have a lot of "bad" days). While I'm at work, I do little things to help (butt squeezes, mini crunches while sitting up, get up from my chair by pushing up with my arms on the armrests). I plan on making a schedule on a calendar, because I need to be more consistent with it. For me, it's not just about losing weight to get a bikini body. It's about setting a good example for my children, embedding a healthy lifestyle in them while they are still young, and making sure I'm around for a long time.

Good luck on your journey!

Kim

cerysrhi · February 2011

I was exactly like this when I had my son I gave up my hobbies so that my husband could still enjoy them I spend all day at home working full time as a child minder to 6 children and then am in almost every evening while my husband goes out I decided to join the gym but soon found with my husbands night shifts and my lates I was never able to go. before I knew it I had nothing for myself and was getting quite upset about it you give yourself to your family and sacrifice your you time. you need to make yourself the priority even if its only for 20 mins a day. the one thing I started doing was going to bed an hour earlier and getting up an hour earlier which is also an hour before my husband and son wake I used this time to go for a walk or do a stint on my Wii fit and then I have a nice wake me up shower before I wake my son. Also remember that MFP has set you a goal number of cals for a projected weekly weight loss if you stay within those cals you can still achieve the weight loss without exercising.

emj1981 · February 2011

I hear ya loud and clear!! I too am a busy mom, I work full-time nights as an RN and have three kiddos, 2, 5, and 10. It is really hard to find time to work, clean house, cook dinners, run errands, be a mother and wife. There are only 24hrs in a day!!! I am trying to lose about 90lbs by my 30th b-day and I am too doing it all on my own, even though I think my hubby could at least push the bandwagon.

Don't feel guilty about taking time for yourself to exercise!! You need it and if it helps you lose the weight it will make you a happier mommy and wife. You have sacrificed alot as a mother and unfortunately your health may be one of those things. I love my walks, I try to go for about an hr, it is my time just be me, not mom or hun, just me. I enjoy doing videos, but it is really hard to get in a workout with a two year old home or when all the kiddos are home and I am not a morning person and willing to wake up at 4am (at least at this time in my life). You can only do what you can do. I wish I had a gym membership, but like you, no $$. Do you have a neighbor or friend that could watch the kiddos for you a couple times a week, just to get in at least a 30min workout? I have just talked with a friend of mine and she said she wouldn't mind a "playdate" so I an exercise indoors at least until the weather is better and I can take my daugther in her stroller.

You are so not alone in this!! It is really hard to stay motivated when you have to take a few days off, but don't get frustrated, you have lost and if you stick to this, you will be that person that you want to be. For me, it's Supermom!

MelissaL582 · February 2011

I'm a stay at home mom of 3 young children. I had to make time for myself. Since my little guys still take naps, I get my workout in while they're napping. Having a gym membership is tough at the moment, so I workout to dvds. What I've learned is that I'm important too. If I don't make time for myself to get better, who is going to take care of my kids if I'm no longer here? With you working a full time job, I'm sure it's harder for you. Just remember that you're worth it. It's okay to be a little selfish, this is for your health and your family needs you forever.

jesstroxel · February 2011

I am a stay at home mom of 5, ranging from 8 years old to 4 months old. I feel like I dont have anytime to myself. I have a Wii and I get fitness games that way the whole family can be involved. Before I did that, we would just turn on some music and dance around the livingroom. Some nights Im extra active when I clean. Example I do heal raises as I do the dishes, stand while I do fold the laundry and do small jumping in place, instead of caring everything up stairs at once, I just take one persons stuff up the stair at a time. I have had to learn to be creative to be able to fit in my workouts with out feel like Im leaving my family out.

Dreamerlove · February 2011

You just have to do it. Your kids need to see you exercising, so they will pick up those habits too. Taking time to exercise isn't just about you having the body you want, it's about installing that activity in your childrens life. I have a friend who has the same situation. She works Full time has three kids (16,12,10) and we are running a Marathon together in November. She gets up at 5am every morning and either runs 3 miles outside (in the freezing cold) and/or does P90X. On Sat mornings she runs about 5-8 miles every Sat morn. Sometimes her 12 comes with us running. He is running a childs Marathon this year. My mother is overweight, and I wish she would take time to just do it. For her sake and my brothers sake. Good Luck.

Oaneer · February 2011

Just hang in there, I know what you mean I have been there many times. Try waking up early and squeeze in a workout about 2 or three times a week . I dont know if you have insanity or p90x but i lil workout in the morning might give you that extra energy boost to get you thru the day. Also while you are up make sure you have a good healthy breakfast and you should be good to go. I am not an expert but I hope this helps or at least lets you know that you are not alone .. Good luck .

Busy Mom

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