Confessions of a lap band failure...

goatstew
goatstew Posts: 50
edited September 23 in Health and Weight Loss
I have lap band. I got the surgery when my first daughter was 5 months old, September 11, 2008. I had many adjustments and never felt the restriction I was hoping for/expecting. My last fill was finally very tight, but then I found out I was pregnant and, for some reason, it got swollen or something and I couldn't even get fluids down. So, I had it drained.

Currently, it is empty. I had the fluid taken out at the start of my last pregnancy. My baby is 4 months now, but I still haven't gone to get it filled. Most of my in laws, and my husband, also have lap band. I've seen their struggles right along with my own, all unique, but struggles nonetheless.

One thing I've learned is, lap band won't do it for you. I truly believe over-eating and unhealthy eating are more than terrible habits or social norms, they're addictions. People learn to, "beat the band." The only sure fire way to lose weight is to adopt a new, healthier lifestyle.

Don't get me wrong, lap band can be a great tool for good if you make the mental and physical changes and let it do it's job. That job being to help you control hunger. However, lots of people depend on the band to control their habits for them, and it just won't do it. You have to make the decision to change, not only your habits, but your way of thinking about everything regarding your health and image.

I don't know if I will get my band filled anytime soon. I DO know that before I do, I want to be in control of my own body, instead of letting food control me. I don't want to be tied to my emotional connection with food. I want to show my weight who's boss, and start viewing food as a tool for energy, not as comfort, or happiness, or anything else. I love food, but I want to love myself more. Before, lap band just wasn't working for me because I wasn't letting it do it's job. Hopefully, in the future, when I'm mentally ready, it will prove to be a wise investment when I let it help do what I'm already fighting to do, control myself.

Replies

  • luv2ash
    luv2ash Posts: 1,903 Member
    wow--great read. I truly was considering this route for myself until I discovered the program I am on currently. Now that I have lost 77 pounds, I could not agree with you more.

    Good luck to you on your journey!
  • This is good information. My stepdad is in the process of getting a lap band, but once he found out he had to lose 10% of the weight first he was pretty upset. He has terrible eating habits, and I know that he is expecting the band to magic his obesity away. I can't seem to convince him otherwise.
  • Vicky14174
    Vicky14174 Posts: 715 Member
    welcome to the family. this is a great place to start your journey.
  • RTricia
    RTricia Posts: 720
    very well written and from the heart. I hope to support you in your endeavors and know that self-awareness is the key to all success!
  • that made for an interesting read! I had never really thought about it like that, but I have heard that things like the lap band and gastric bypass dont work if you dont want them too! You can do this! with or without it! You dont NEED it to lose weight, just need some motivation! and this is a great place to get it!
  • ItsMissMuffy
    ItsMissMuffy Posts: 27 Member
    welcome

    through the struggles, hi and lows

    I hope I can help you by giving support

    <3Muffin
  • katya143
    katya143 Posts: 313 Member
    U ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!!!! JUST TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT I AM GOING THROUGH!!!! I EAT LIKE CRAP AND KNOW IT BUT STILL TEND TO DO IT! IM INSANE!!! MY name is katherine :)
  • freightdiva
    freightdiva Posts: 55 Member
    Sorry it didn't work for you! I really agree that food can be an addiction and just stopping the hunger and making you full faster will not cure the urge to eat as most of us know we do not always eat just for hunger or we would not be fat! I have been on a journey since 2005 to be healthy and to get my addiction under control. I am currently reading a good book that I feel would help you also its called Crave by Cynthia Bulik . Good Luck to you!
  • WOW!! that was amazing. Good for you!! I agree with everything you say 100%. You have all of our support and help whenever you need it.
  • hooah_mj
    hooah_mj Posts: 1,004 Member
    What you just did, confessing your most honest thoughts about where you are emotionally/mentally, is extremely healthy :smile: I pray that you'll be able to push forward, past all the road blocks and experience a healthy new view about food and how wonderful you are!

    I hope you love yourself healthy, lean, clean...whatever it may be that will make you everything you want/hope to be :heart:

    We're here for you, please keep us posted.

    Hooah to ya :flowerforyou:
  • 33KIKI
    33KIKI Posts: 304
    U ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!!!! JUST TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT I AM GOING THROUGH!!!! I EAT LIKE CRAP AND KNOW IT BUT STILL TEND TO DO IT! IM INSANE!!! MY name is katherine :)

    Ok she is so not insane just stuck in pleateau hell..:heart:

    That is a great thought and BTW I totally agree- I have my bad days but with my last fill I am making more of the effort to drop and defiantely working out more.

    I commend you for bringing to light something that some folks think that surgery any surgery is an easy fix -NOPE..it's up to that person to step up and be ready to make the changes needed.

    I hope when you are 100% ready to commit to a healthier lifestyle and you stay strong and remember what you already know :bigsmile:
  • waguchan
    waguchan Posts: 450 Member
    Yah... I've had bad days with my band. Small weigh gains that I have to struggle with to get back down. But before I had the band, no amount of exercise or nutritional councelling or counting calories could get me below 200 pounds. I was not lazy. I was doing things what I read and was told was right by weight loss specialists, personal trainers, etc. But the fat wouldn't budge until I was able to start eating less than 1000 calories per day.

    Before my band, the weight gains were bigger, faster, and totally out of control. Now I feel I have control. I know I'll be struggling with the last 10-20 pounds to goal up and down the rest of my life. But I prefer that to struggling with 100 pounds.
  • Yeah, I totally don't want people to think that I think the band is an ineffective tool. It is an absolutely effective tool if it is used correctly (not beat.) My husband and his dad will eat and "burp" things down, pretty much forcing down what the band wants to keep out. I've also heard of people blending up all their food so they could get it down, which totally defeats the purpose. And I've heard of people, "pouching," where a little stretched out pouch develops above the band so food sits there and goes down eventually.That is what I referred to when I talked about beating the band. I know that when I do go to get a fill, after all the effort and learning I've done not using it, I will be able to utilize it as a tool and reach my goal much easier with it's help.
  • AnitaAntone
    AnitaAntone Posts: 177 Member
    THANKS for your post! I've thought about surgery but have put it off. I've thought I would have to change my lifestyle and bad habits for it to be successful so why shouldn't I make those changes now and save myself surgery. This is my last chance to get the weight off this year or its surgery next year. Your comments have been enlightening for me and makes me feel better about my decision!Here's to success in this journey for all of us.
  • Victorious_One
    Victorious_One Posts: 174 Member
    Thanks for sharing, Aantone. Your desire to eat well and to be healthy comes shining through!

    The NIH says that people can expect to lose 33%-50% of the extra weight they're carrying with the lap band. There are other weight loss surgeries that offer a better statistical chance of not only losing more of your excess weight, but of keeping it off longer term. For example, the statistics on the bypass (from the same source) for excess weight loss are at more than 50%; and is 70-81% for the duodenal switch.

    Lap bands are the least invasive of weight loss surgeries, and the easiest to "beat." You can eat around stomach restriction fairly easily by overeating over time, compared to the other surgeries. This is difficult for people who are overweight due to chronic overeating. The chances of them being truly successful over time with the band are very slim.

    If people are interested in having weight loss surgery, I would encourage them to know ALL their options. A good place to learn more about the different types of surgery and their benefits is at ObesityHelp.com.
  • mielikkibz
    mielikkibz Posts: 552 Member
    THANKS for your post! I've thought about surgery but have put it off. I've thought I would have to change my lifestyle and bad habits for it to be successful so why shouldn't I make those changes now and save myself surgery. This is my last chance to get the weight off this year or its surgery next year. Your comments have been enlightening for me and makes me feel better about my decision!Here's to success in this journey for all of us.

    i thought of it, until I talked to my mom who has had it. . 3 meals of 3ozs of food, throwing up after eating food, and doing medical flex plans at work, seeing how much people have to pay to make sure their diets are balanced(protein shakes, supplements for the rest of your life,e tc), I opted to do it one lb at a time.

    Good luck to all
  • I had Lap-band surgery four years ago, it has been quite the roller coaster ride. I have lost a total of 44 lbs. It is an incredible tool for anyone looking to lose weight or just change their relationship with food but I have had my share of ups and downs. My issues are when the band is too tight and/or food gets stuck and I have to get fluid taken out to clear it. The problem is, if they take fluid out they cant put it all back in for about a month, so in the meantime i can eat more carbs and generally more calories. This causes me to go back up several pounds and take a couple steps backwards. I have been in a wonderful place with my band for the last 6 months, what they call my "green zone", but on Valentine's day food got stuck, I had to have fluid removed and after two weeks gained 6 lbs. This is SOOOO frustratiing....I know I am to blame but it is very easy to depend on the band for total support. I run, walk, cycle and attend extreme cardio classes on a regular basis now, this seems to help with speeding up the weight loss and is helping to keep the weight off. I just wish I would have learned this behavior before I had surgery. It really is about excercise and food choices.

    With the band I am in control of my hunger, but I have learned I still have food issues if I lose that control when my band is looser and I have a week or two of food vacation. This 6lbs was an eye opener for me, I am now watching my food intake much closer, especially if I am in between band adjustments.
  • RumpusP
    RumpusP Posts: 163 Member
    I have lap band. I got the surgery when my first daughter was 5 months old, September 11, 2008. I had many adjustments and never felt the restriction I was hoping for/expecting. My last fill was finally very tight, but then I found out I was pregnant and, for some reason, it got swollen or something and I couldn't even get fluids down. So, I had it drained.

    Currently, it is empty. I had the fluid taken out at the start of my last pregnancy. My baby is 4 months now, but I still haven't gone to get it filled. Most of my in laws, and my husband, also have lap band. I've seen their struggles right along with my own, all unique, but struggles nonetheless.

    One thing I've learned is, lap band won't do it for you. I truly believe over-eating and unhealthy eating are more than terrible habits or social norms, they're addictions. People learn to, "beat the band." The only sure fire way to lose weight is to adopt a new, healthier lifestyle.

    Don't get me wrong, lap band can be a great tool for good if you make the mental and physical changes and let it do it's job. That job being to help you control hunger. However, lots of people depend on the band to control their habits for them, and it just won't do it. You have to make the decision to change, not only your habits, but your way of thinking about everything regarding your health and image.

    I don't know if I will get my band filled anytime soon. I DO know that before I do, I want to be in control of my own body, instead of letting food control me. I don't want to be tied to my emotional connection with food. I want to show my weight who's boss, and start viewing food as a tool for energy, not as comfort, or happiness, or anything else. I love food, but I want to love myself more. Before, lap band just wasn't working for me because I wasn't letting it do it's job. Hopefully, in the future, when I'm mentally ready, it will prove to be a wise investment when I let it help do what I'm already fighting to do, control myself.

    Excellent post... A lot of people without AND with weight loss surgeries of various types think it will do it for them, when the truth is that they need to be taken as extra help while eating right and exercising. People can and do find ways to cheat them or solely rely on them and then get frustrated when they only lose only a little and/or gain it all back. It has to be PART of the process, not all.

    I had gastric bypass and during support groups online and offline have seen a lot of people who it hasn't worked for because of unrealistic expectations of it, when it comes down to it. People who are food addicts of various types, people who think they can get the surgery and then change nothing, etc. and then are frustrated or truly regretful of having it done.
  • Laura8603
    Laura8603 Posts: 590 Member
    I'm sorry for your struggles. I was also contemplating having a lap band but decided on gastric bypass instead. I knew I would eat around a band and not be successful. My surgery was also in September 2008. It was the right choice for me.

    I wish you well in your journey.
  • FJcntdwn2sknyluv
    FJcntdwn2sknyluv Posts: 651 Member
    Yeah...and neither will gastric bypass .. they are just the tools to get the job done!...

    YOU HAVE TO WANT IT !!! Or nothing will happen!.. And yes this is a lifestyle change!..

    2 things 1) Food ONLY SOLVES hunger the rest is EMOTIONAL !
    2) Eat to LIVE not live to EAT! .......

    And now you know now make it happen!.... I had this SAME light bulb moment in September of last year... and you relationship with food will change for the better :) and with me it was one of the keys that I can now say I conquered in this journey to a healthy and WHOLE ME!
    Congrats
  • ladytinkerbell99
    ladytinkerbell99 Posts: 970 Member
    I am glad it worked for you. We each have to find what is best for us. You are so right. :flowerforyou:
  • 33KIKI
    33KIKI Posts: 304
    so random ? for you banders out there..the trainers I work out are telling to try a 6Xday meal plan. I am thinking I am going to try the meals are not huge but it's supposed to help restart the weight loss process. 2 of the meals are shakes and then the others are mostly 3oz chicken with a veggie..oh and breakfast egg whites and 1/2 oats. SO just curious. I had my surgery in 10/08 and lost like 75 then gained back a least 20 so now I work out 4Xwk and try to watch what I eat but I also refuse to deprive myself so thinking this plan may work. currently I am less than 3 lbs away from hitting that 100 lb marker and my band is maxed out.

    If you don't think this is good then what other suggestions have you used to help restart the loss. Technically on the charts I am still morbidly obese but I don't feel like that.

    Thanks in advance for your thought :)
  • jade2112
    jade2112 Posts: 272 Member
    Thanks for sharing, Aantone. Your desire to eat well and to be healthy comes shining through!

    The NIH says that people can expect to lose 33%-50% of the extra weight they're carrying with the lap band. There are other weight loss surgeries that offer a better statistical chance of not only losing more of your excess weight, but of keeping it off longer term. For example, the statistics on the bypass (from the same source) for excess weight loss are at more than 50%; and is 70-81% for the duodenal switch.

    Lap bands are the least invasive of weight loss surgeries, and the easiest to "beat." You can eat around stomach restriction fairly easily by overeating over time, compared to the other surgeries. This is difficult for people who are overweight due to chronic overeating. The chances of them being truly successful over time with the band are very slim.

    If people are interested in having weight loss surgery, I would encourage them to know ALL their options. A good place to learn more about the different types of surgery and their benefits is at ObesityHelp.com.

    I actually had the Duodenal Switch and have lost well over 100% of my excess weight. I've kept it off for over three years with little effort. Guess I should also add I've lost 140 pounds.
  • I had LapBand surgery in June 2008. I have lost a total of 75 lbs. Just last month when I went in for my yearly upper GI...I was told that my band is so tight that it is now causing my esophogaus to bulge. They have removed 2cc of fluid from my band to see if my that fixes the issue. My doctor tells me that they have discovered that in order for the patient to feel restricted the band has to be so tight that it causes other issue (like in my case) his suggestion is that I have the band removed, wait 3 months(for healing)and then have another sugery that he called "The Sleeve". I am currently feeling no eating restriction and am in "panic mode" that I will gain all of my weight back. However, I am not real keen on having another surgery. Has anyone out there had this or similar problems? Has anyone had "The Sleeve" surgery? Any opinions/advice welcome.
  • helenx55
    helenx55 Posts: 48 Member
    I had a band in 07, it was useless to me i was uneducated in eating properly. i have various problems and didnt lose an ounce!!
    my band has been empty since 2010, i started my journey here on mfp 1st may last year i think dr's need to start refering people here rather than to surgeons.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    One thing I've learned is, lap band won't do it for you. I truly believe over-eating and unhealthy eating are more than terrible habits or social norms, they're addictions. People learn to, "beat the band." The only sure fire way to lose weight is to adopt a new, healthier lifestyle.

    This, years ago my mom got altered. She lost a ton of weight and worked extremely hard to make sure that she changed her lifestyle completely, including removing friends and family who weren't supportive of her weightloss. Amazingly, it's not uncommon for people to get really pissed off when someone loses a large amount of weight.

    My mom went to some of the support groups, but she found they were filled with the same people, making the same complaints, and stuffing themselves with the same donuts that got them where they were before their surgery. She also observed that most people revert to their old weight or more after surgery. So she decided to stop being around people like that, and stopped the support groups. She's doing amazingly well, down to a size 4 I think, and keeping it off.

    What worked for her though, was that she stopped her old habits completely and started brand new, healthful habits that she works daily to maintain. Sure, she can't share a pitcher of margaritas with me anymore, but she can have some, and still enjoy. It's all about moderation.
  • KMC1885
    KMC1885 Posts: 1
    I had my surgery in 11/10. 09/11 I injured my back at work and literally can not (dr orders) lift more than 5lbs, walk more than 30 min within an hour and most days I find it difficult to do the 30 min of walking. Naturally I can't exercise as stationary bikes make my injury worse. I was doing well maintaining my weight for about 7 months after injury until something got stuck. I lost my health insurance and ignored the fact that I couldn't keep things down until it came to the point I couldn't get water down. I've gained about 25 lbs back since they removed and have added 3 times to get me back to my original state and now I am too tight. I'm ready to remove and wait to get married to have the sleeve done. My roommate had complications with her band surgery and ended up getting the sleeve and within 4 months of surgery lost well over 60 lbs. anyone else feeling this way!? Or been in similar situations?
  • I had my band placed in the spring of 2009. Within the first 9 months or so, I lost about 65 pounds. Unfortunately, I never changed my eating habits-- at all. I just let the band either make me stop eating or throwing it up if it wouldn't go down. It was like a serious case of surgical bulimia to me. That was in 2009, mind you. Fast forward to the summer of 2013. Because of the vomiting that I just "had no clue" about, my band was completely unfilled and I was sent to get my gall bladder out. My gall bladder came out in Nov '13 and I still have been throwing up. In all honesty, I never even realized it was because of my crappy eating habits-- too big bites, not chewing well enough, eating too fast, making SERIOUSLY poor food choices... I thought I had some weird disorder or maybe stomach cancer or something. Fast forward to a little over a week ago. I'm in nursing school which comes with a tremendous amount of stress and we just finished finals. I was throwing up absolutely everything I put in my mouth. I decided to relegate myself to a liquid diet so I could focus on studying and not puking. Lo and behold, the vomiting stopped. I stayed on liquids for 3 days. This was NOT a weight loss attempt. It was just me being desperate to be quit barfing.
    Of course... For a self admitted food addict, staying on full liquids for 3 days was awful. But when it was all said and done... I did it. And I had an epiphany. I was MAKING myself throw up with bad eating and even worse habits. Seriously-- that thought had never occurred to me. I'm not even kidding. But... Gasp! It was MY fault? *I* was to blame? Maybe my band actually could work if I LET IT? So I'm changing my habits. Drastically. In a way I never did after surgery. And holy crap it's working!!! I eat maybe 1-1.5 cups of food at meals only. I take small bites, chew thoroughly, and don't drink while I eat. I haven't thrown up in over a week. I don't have constant chest pain from reflux. I've also lost about 10 pounds (the 65 I lost immediately post surgery I LONG since had gained back).
    Of course it's not easy and I *think* I'm hungry between meals. But I drink some crystal light and find something else to do than eat. And I know that I'm never "done" with these changes. I'm an addict. I'm probably never going to have a naturally healthy relationship with food-- but I can choose to be healthy in spite of it. And I am, with the HELP of the band. Even if it's not the magical cure-all I was convinced it was supposed to be. And keep in mind... This is all with JUST an unfilled band. Will I likely need a fill in the future? Sure. But right now, since I'm treating it right, just my and being placed is working for me!!
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