Discouraged

jennigriff
jennigriff Posts: 33
edited September 23 in Motivation and Support
I have been watching my weight with healthy eating plus vigorous exercises sense November of 2010. I basically changed my life to get healthy. In this time I have lost more weight than I can actually count with MFP as I just found out about MFP in January of this year. I have gone down a dress size and a half. That's pretty good for someone taking a medication that makes it hard to loose weight.

At first, I was proud at my accomplishments. So much so, that I even sported a tighter pair of pants in public. Major confidence boost to hear the brother in law say "Wow you look great" after not seeing me for 6 months. The family recently had an outing where we all went bowling. My sister in law's bf saw me then and was nice and we got on.

Now, he is sending me an email calling me fat. (out of the blue) My feathers fell and it has me depressed that all I am doing and working hard is for nothing as I am always going to be big in everyone's eyes. No one understands how hurtful the email was to me because the others that see it are pencil trim. I am just so distraught and discouraged. I could use some support and some motivation because mine is out the window just about it. However, somehow in this drama I have managed to keep up with MFP and the gym. Any thoughts on motivation and getting rid of stress would be helpful.

Replies

  • quara
    quara Posts: 255 Member
    Well, your sister-in-law's boyfriend sounds like a tool, for one thing! You're doing this for yourself - not him or anyone else. Don't let him discourage you. (Why would anyone call someone fat - especially in an email, when you have complete control over what you write and edit before you press send?) Try not to compare yourself to other people - focus on your successes and you will keep being successful. And let fellow MFP-ers give you encouragement if you're not getting it elsewhere!! Good luck!!!
  • crazymama2two
    crazymama2two Posts: 867
    why the hell would he even write to you like that? what was he so mad about? and remember that he knows how hard you've been working and he knows what buttons to push to make you feel ****ty and sad and frustrated. use his negativity to benefit you and prove him wrong and show himj that youre the better person for not pushing his buttons back. youre not fat...he's an *kitten* and will always tay that way. god i wish i oculd punch him for you :)
  • jennigriff
    jennigriff Posts: 33
    thank you both... and bubbasmom514 I would let you punch him. :)
  • dieseljay74
    dieseljay74 Posts: 376
    Don't getdiscouraged by someone like that....let it motivate you even more to reach your goal and rub it back in his face!
  • terryhuff
    terryhuff Posts: 15
    Dude sounds like a jerk! You are doing this for you right??? If so then dont worry about him! You are better than him! Have a little confidence in yourself bc you feel good about you! Dont worry about others they are always gonna let you down! You can only count on yourself!!!!
  • DonM46
    DonM46 Posts: 771 Member
    Delete the email.
    Ignore the clod for now.
    Avoid being in his presence in the near future.
    Be proud of what you've accomplished.
    When you reach your goal, put on your sexiest attire, have your hair, nails, and make up done to perfection.
    THEN, arrange to 'accidently' meet Mr. Sensitive.
  • LaDiablesse
    LaDiablesse Posts: 862 Member
    Some people are just miserable, and the only way they can feel better about themselves is to try and bring others down to their level. Keep on doing what you're doing, and know that you're beautiful no matter what someone like him says. He is an ugly person, and ugly on the inside always radiates outwardly no matter how in shape or nice looking a person is. Keep your head up!
  • shelbyj72
    shelbyj72 Posts: 184 Member
    I have learned to workout harder at the Gym to release my frustrations. So that she just make you workout even more. If you think you are a failure you will be one so you may want to make some adjustments on that thinking and start thinking positive and looking at the finish line. Keep your head up!
  • poisongirl6485
    poisongirl6485 Posts: 1,487 Member
    *kitten* him. I would have ripped him a new A**hole.
  • DonM46
    DonM46 Posts: 771 Member
    But how do you REALLY feel, pg6485? :laugh:
  • minkakross
    minkakross Posts: 687 Member
    while this may seem insensitve I want to state up front it's not meant to be. I know skinny girls who get called fat because it pushes their buttons and I know fat girls who get called fat because they are, I think to give good feedback I'd need to know what the context was. then again if he becomes your excuse for giving up on your goals and yourslef that's on you not him, him being an *kitten* that's on him. Also you may want to consider discussing this with his girlfriend as he may just be emotionally abusive and maybe he calls her fat or worse when they are not in pubic, maybe she is not aware of this side of him. You could always be subtle about it by forwarding her the email and saying "do you know why he might have said this?"
  • MyBeautyIsSkinDeep
    MyBeautyIsSkinDeep Posts: 112
    Well, your sister-in-law's boyfriend sounds like a tool, for one thing! You're doing this for yourself - not him or anyone else. Don't let him discourage you. (Why would anyone call someone fat - especially in an email, when you have complete control over what you write and edit before you press send?) Try not to compare yourself to other people - focus on your successes and you will keep being successful. And let fellow MFP-ers give you encouragement if you're not getting it elsewhere!! Good luck!!!


    Could not be put in better words!!! This healthy life style got to be about you!! NOBODY ELSE!!! Stay strong!!! and cont to work hard at your MISSION !!! To be happy , healthy , sexy , and beautiful ect... which i believe that you already are!!!
  • bullmastifflover
    bullmastifflover Posts: 128 Member
    Argh, that pisses me off that he would say something like that to you! Seriously, does he think he's motivating you? As if it's his place to motivate you in the first place!

    If someone said something like that to me I would have to respond and my response would not be kind. Ask him why he's paying so much attention to your body and then tell him to kiss your fat *kitten* and f-himself!

    You do the best you can to push that comment out of your mind. You're eating healthy not just for the results of being thin, but also to be healthy and have more energy and sleep better.
  • Rickv67
    Rickv67 Posts: 10
    Definitely sounds like a tool.

    The thing is that you have to do it for yourself and no one else. Don't get discourage by any name calling or whatever. If anything, that should help you try to get over that bit of a hump.
    The vengeance will be yours when you look better in your clothes then they do in a few years.

    Besides, you could always make the retort of, "I may be fat, but you're ugly, but *I* am losing weight."
    I've said that to a few taunting (but dear friends) and that pretty much shut them up.


    Screw him. If anything, SIL will learn he's a tool before it's too late.
  • kel516
    kel516 Posts: 7
    That guy is just an *kitten* and he boosts his own ego to try and tear someone else down. So not worth the effort of letting him get the best of you. Let it slide as his insecurities and not yours. What a jerk!
  • noneya2010
    noneya2010 Posts: 446 Member
    *kitten* him. I would have ripped him a new A**hole.

    My thoughts exactly!! I'd probably rip the Sid-in-law too
    For associating with an a-hole like that
  • jennigriff
    jennigriff Posts: 33
    I have learned to workout harder at the Gym to release my frustrations. So that she just make you workout even more. If you think you are a failure you will be one so you may want to make some adjustments on that thinking and start thinking positive and looking at the finish line. Keep your head up!

    You know, you are right. I've never been a quitter. I'm beating this. It's not about him, it's about me!!
  • jennigriff
    jennigriff Posts: 33
    I was sitting in my work, went through my emails for the day to reply to. I see his. I open it thinking it is important being we do not email each other. I got a horrible email from him. That's all I know.
  • junkfoodsux
    junkfoodsux Posts: 21
    Just ignore *kitten*'s like that, and let his insecurities empower you! OR.......

    ....write him back saying he has a small pen!$ and that the only two women he's satisfying are his right and left hand, maybe!
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