this little words changed my life

Anidorie
Anidorie Posts: 291 Member
edited September 24 in Chit-Chat
What few little words changed your life? For me it was probably hen i was a kid and someone really really close to me told me i wasnt good enough to wear a dress the words "you're not good enough" stuck with me for years. Those words changed me because for years i thought i was never good enough for anything. But now i see that i am just as good as thye were and that i will never do taht to another kid.

Replies

  • amydcarlson
    amydcarlson Posts: 136 Member
    My 3 year old nephew asked me if I had a baby in my tummy. :ohwell: He is a sweet heart, and his mommy was pregnant with my niece at the time, so he had babies on the brain. It was just the honesty of it that really got me... That is when I knew that, yes, I was fat, and yes....sometimes grown-ups are just too afraid to be as brutally honest as kids naturally are.
  • gdnplnty
    gdnplnty Posts: 167 Member
    I have both negative and postive little words that have changed my life:

    Negative - "Nobody will ever want you." - Ex-husband prior to our divorce 18 years ago.

    Postive - "Wow! Mom, you can fasten your bra all the way closed!" - My goobergirl this afternoon as I was getting ready for work. In other words, I didn't have to have it on the last hooks or use the extender to keep the girls in place.

    Negative - "My, you sure have gotten fat." - My mom a few years ago when I came home after a long time for my Grandmothers funeral.

    Positive - "My love, you look fantastic." - My husband last week :-)
  • yogaangel
    yogaangel Posts: 7
    my dad sang the song "roly poly, daddy's little fatty" to me at the dinner table when I was a little girl one time and it was the beginning of the low self-esteem and body image. :( A 35 year old memory that still hurts.
  • Anidorie
    Anidorie Posts: 291 Member
    i hate it when people tell me i am fat when their BMI is much much higher then mine.
  • myhrmiswrong
    myhrmiswrong Posts: 38 Member
    In Nov 2008, I went for my annual doctor's visit. Showed him pictures of my new 6 mo. old granddaughter. He looked at her and said, "Oh, she's cute. You want to be around in 10 years to play with her?"

    At the time I was on 3 blood pressure meds, Zocor, and 1000 mg. of metformin for my blood sugar. I weighed 294 lbs.

    That was like being punched in the mouth.

    I am now in the best shape of my life, have boundless energy, and feel like I'm 30 years younger.

    I can ski all day, every day, and never get winded or tired. My legs do not ache for days after as before.

    I can hike up mountains without having to stop to rest and recover.

    Today I weigh 180 lbs and am off all of those meds. My doctor says I have added 15 years to my life.

    His words changed my life. And hopefully extended it as well.
  • suziehomemaker
    suziehomemaker Posts: 116
    wow how much this thread brings memories back mine were

    wow everytime we see you your getting a little chubbier huh? - my grandparents EVERY time they would see me 2-3 times a year

    ur too fat to wear that! - the kids in school when i wore anything even remotely tight

    and the one that scarred me the most.....my best friend got pregnant when we were both 16...i went to a prenatal class with her and this guy who was only a few years older then us asked her when she was due and so she told him and then he turned to me and said....... Wow your so big already? When are you due?

    scarred me for life :*(
  • spennato
    spennato Posts: 360 Member
    For me it was not words, it was going on an amusement ride down at the beach with my son only to have to get of the ride because I was to big for the safety harness to close. Rest assured this July I will ride that same ride. There is no worse feeling than having to walk past a whole line of people who all know why you can not ride the ride.....Everyone Keep up the good work!!!
  • Kiwijay
    Kiwijay Posts: 216
    A few years back I decided that enough was enough. I went to my Nanas on New Years Day, it's a tradition in our house. On the table she had a packet of my all time favourite biscuits {cookies} called toffee pops. She urged me to have one while pushing the packet towards me. 'No thanks nana, I'm not eating that sort of thing anymore' to which her reply made me totally fuel my weightloss journey 'are you on a diet AGAIN, how long will this one last?'

    For me that was it. I was sooooo determind to show her I could do it. Other than myself there were two people I had to prove it to her and my big brother. The day my nana said 'wow Janine you have lost heaps of weight' I thought ha SEE TOLD YOU! I had lost about 25 kilos at that point.

    I sadly and dissappointingly put a fair few of the 60kgs I previously lost on whilst living in the UK for a year and now have to start all over again. My nana has passed away now and the only person I am doing this for this time is ME. It's all about ME! Words can hurt but boy can they motivate too!
  • idahogirl71
    idahogirl71 Posts: 1,110 Member
    Mine was when I was 12 years old and weighed 160 pounds (27 yrs ago and 190 # lighter than I am today) my mother said to me, "I am so glad you are fat because bad things don't happen to fat girls...they don't get raped and they don't get kidnapped". Those harsh words have stuck with me for the last 27 years and every time I lose 25-30 pounds they echo in my head and I panic and gain the weight back plus more. Well not this time!! I will overcome those evil words!!
  • SortaBadass
    SortaBadass Posts: 46 Member

    Negative - "Nobody will ever want you." - Ex-husband prior to our divorce 18 years ago.

    . . .

    Positive - "My love, you look fantastic." - My husband last week :-)

    Wow... Sometimes I am just amazed at the lengths people will go to in order to hurt one another. I have to give you plenty of props for disregarding his obviously bitter digs and making a better life for yourself!
  • justsummie
    justsummie Posts: 320 Member
    A few years back I went to dinner with my sister and my neice. The hostess lady came up to me and said "You look like such a proud Grandma." I was 25 at the time and had/have no gray hair or wrinkles. I know her comment was based on my weight and the type of clothes I was wearing to hide my weight.

    When I was growing up my father routinely told me "Your a f*ckin loser" so that one stuck with me.

    And of course the classic "But you have such a pretty face....." by all those well-meaning people throughout my life.
  • Amyeeeeeee
    Amyeeeeeee Posts: 93 Member
    I think mine was when my boyfriend told me if I loose weight dont loose my butt. Thats where 50% of it is at... that and my hips. I cried later and I know he didnt mean it in a bad way because he has been my rock since I got a divorce back in 2010. I hope that these words helps someone else who thinks that ppl are being ugly and not trying to hurt you. He actually made me realize that I was beautiful and he loves my butt but I need to work on it some and shed these 55 lbs.. Already have 4 and Im stoked!!!!
  • Lisamariemlt
    Lisamariemlt Posts: 101 Member
    A few little words from my doctor. Wow your bp is 172/115 and that's with being on two bp meds. And. The second was your blood sugars are .4 away from type 2 diabetes. Guess what. I immidately joined heren surgery has me down for a bit but in my first week I lost 4 lbs. And I'll be back soon to loose lots more
  • daffysbird
    daffysbird Posts: 42
    I need to have a heart operation and the hospital are nervous about me under anethesitic (or however you spell it - knocked out basically) because of my size. I will be honest this has been there excuse for years and my size has been slowly getting bigger and I have been using my heart problem as an excuse not to do any exercise. But then I met my partner, daffy and fell in love. I've been married before but never felt like this before. He loves me just the way I am and would love me what ever size I was. But now I want to do it for him as well as me. I want to be the gorgeous bride (although he tell me every day, I am!) I want to be the mother of his children and the size that I am and my medical problems mean that after 9 miscarriages it is less and less likely unless I do something about it. Also my best friend has the most gorgeous little boy and she gave me the honour of being his godmother and whilst he is only 18 months old at the moment if i don't do something to change i am not going to be around to see his 8th birthday never mind buy his 1st legal pint or mop his tears when a girl breaks his heart (not that they will, he'll be the heart-breaker!)

    So i guess the little words that changed my life were from a friend that said if you want to see your godson, grow up if you want to be a mother to daffy's children and if you want us to be wild and reckless as pensioners do something about it now. But most of all this time I am doing it for me and yes i may get disheartened when the results are slow and steady or sometimes not all but most importantly i will get there and i can't wait!!!
  • Oishii
    Oishii Posts: 2,675 Member
    What heart breaking stories!

    Having yo-yoed for years, I have had a couple of those moments.

    Teaching in Japan I pretended not to speak Japanese, so when a group of girls started discussing how fat my butt was they didn't bother lowering their voices even! That lost me the extra 10kg I was carrying :happy:

    Then, more recently, the head bell-ringer at church took me aside to tell me that a number of them had been wondering when the baby was due! I had to tell him I was just fat! I lost 10kg soon after.

    This time I was already a good weight for my height so chose by myself to lose weight. However, having lost the weight my husband told me I had been 'chubby' before (59kg for 165cm is not chubby!) but maybe remembering that will help me maintain my current weight.
  • time2move
    time2move Posts: 78 Member
    Almost every time I see my grandma, she makes a comment about my weight. She's 90 years old, raised me, and well she can do that. She's not being mean about it.

    She's been in the hospital for about a month and when I went to visit her two weeks ago, she noticed right away that I've lost weight. Once I took my coat off, she said "Hey, you look like you've lost weight!"

    That made my month.
This discussion has been closed.

Categories