How to stop the "supportive" people?

honesty and love. That is all.

Give him alternitives....... a book you want...nail polish.....back rub........there are lots of stuff we ladies like that don't cost us any calories...good luck and give that guy a hug!!!!!

What about cooking together? Learn together and try new things together? Find healthier ways to make meatloaf (there are some great recipes on here for that).

As for the candy, tell him you appreciate the thought, but ask if he can limit them?

Here's another thing that came to mind when I read your post. It was something taught in the classes I had to take last year.
" You can still eat the things you love. You just need to determine HOW MUCH you can eat without throwing your numbers out of whack."
This was for Diabetic numbers, but it goes for calories, sodium...everything.

Tell him thanks, but no thanks to the reeses. Explain you are working hard and they are too much of a temptation.

As for dinner. I have always eaten all the same foods, made just a bit differently.

Meatloaf
Mashed Potatoes
Steamed veggies.

The meatloaf recipe I have always used works well with egg whites and 7% fat ground beef.
Mashed potatoes are delish when boiled in low sodium chicken broth and skim or 1 % milk

I make myself steamed brocolli and load 1/2 my plate with it.

I then give hubs his stick of butter to smother everthing in so HE is happy:happy:

We have to make choices for our own bodies. My husband still eats a pint of icecream a night-but I no longer join him. My choice.

Good luck to you. You can do this!!:flowerforyou:

Thank you for the Reeses, let's ride bikes for a couple hours so I can eat one . . .

I really like this statement because it shows the person how much hard work you have to put in to enjoy the old things you used to. It shows them that you have to make a change in order to continue eating those things.

I think it's kind of a cool way to say it (as long as you don't say it in a snarky or sarcastic tone of course).

I have to remind my husband that yes, I would absolutely LOVE to have those things, but I do not need them, and really should not have them. I ask him to help remind me to keep my portions down when we eat away from home, and he tries, but usually gets worried about making me unhappy. And he definitely doesn't want to make me mad at him. But I just have to remind him that sure, I'll be unhappy that I can't eat more (even if I've already had plenty), but I'll be SO much happier when I get to my goal weight. Those small sacrifices are worth it. And whenever he wants to go eat out for convenience, I remind him that we have food at home and that it costs money to eat out. We both love eating out, but he's so money-conscious that my tactic usually works.

Maybe instead of him surprising you with Reese's, suggest that he try surprising you with flowers or something else to show he was thinking of you. I'd go for that!

Tell him to stick to Reeses Pieces because they're easier to portion control

With the veg I'd do what I've done with my son: never stop serving it, he might eventually eat some. My son now eats most veg. Maybe it could work with your bf. :laugh:

Oh, this is a tricky one. You'll see here that I am not one to talk as I just joined last week and have -0- pounds lost. But here's some ideas anyway:

Explain to your fiance that giving you chocolate for your body is akin to putting a nail in the tire of your car or sugar in your gas tank. It is NOT what it needs.

Make dinner together - but either keep your portion small or modified, i.e.; meat to be plain (no gravy) or potatoes boiled and plain...broccoli steamed - etc. Same ingredients - just yours are paired down or cooked healthfully.

Ask him to check out this site's recipe's section for lean meals that appeal to him as well.

Go out to eat but resolve to be a little more picky (a la Sally from "When Harry met Sally" - "I'd like a salad but with the salad dressing on the side...") order steamed vegetables and egg whites for dinner. You never know if the wait/cook staff will accommodate you until you ask - even at a small diner. DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK. (and don't forget to be nice as pie - oh, but don't order pie!)

There are some meals that might appeal to your meat-and-potatoes guy that may not be that bad for you. Here's one that comes to mind:

McCormick's Slow Cookers Hearty Beef Stew (make with lean stew meat, carrots, kale or bok choy, yellow onion and small red potatoes) Yummy, manly, and not too unhealthy. (But watch your sodium intake on the rest of you foods the day you have this)

You're gonna have to get creative, but ultimately you are going to have to take ownership of what you put into your body, when and why. And maybe lead by example - if your finance sees that you are committed and sticking with it even when it is not easy or convenient then perhaps he will begin to take your goals more seriously - or at least they will become more "present" for him.

Hope this helps,

Jules

wait...are you engaged to my husband??? LOL....I swear you are talking about him. I am in the same situation as you! I, however, had to bend and start making two dinners. One for my meat and potatoes husband and kids and then a healthy one for me. Usually the meals I make myself are enough for 3-4 meals, so I have leftovers for the week....but, I FEEL YOUR PAIN!!!!

honesty and love. That is all.

I agree. You need to find something else to put in place of those chocolate fixes. Tell him, Honey, I know you love me and you are trying to show me that in these little gifts but honestly, since I've started eating healthier, I just don't feel like I want to eat them anymore. How about you get me ___ instead when you feel like you need to treat me to something? You will have to replace the blank with your substitution (maybe yogurts or fruit baskets... IDK, only you can make that decision). This why he knows that he can show his love and support by getting you a little something and you won't feel like he's the devil in disguise. My ex was the same way - not in the treating but in sabotaging my efforts and self esteem in other ways (verbal mostly).

As for the dining out... you might just have to resort to cooking separate meals if you definately don't want what you're cooking for him, or if he wants meatloaf and mashed potatoes, mix with lean beef and turkey and or chicken and then add a couple of veges that you can opt for instead of the potatoes and he can add if he want's to. You have to show him, no matter what you are determined to follow your plan. Right now he's kind of testing your waters of strength. You have to realize too that it's hard to accept change. You are growing and changing in ways that he's not ready to embrace. You have to show him that the two can coexist positively but that you won't tolerate his sabotage - whether conscious or not.

I know it sucks cooking different meals. How about you prepare a weeks worth of meals for both of you on the weekend and have things setup for single servings, this way when he want's mashed potatoes and meatloaf and gravy you can have a nice whole grain veggie lasagna in about the same time and they are home made so it's not like making prepared foods. I think having him involved in the cooking process more would help too. Maybe you can convince him to save money on nights out for dinner if you are saving that money for something.... maybe a weekend getaway when you're a little more stable in your diet plan (where you can forget calorie counting but make visual healthy choices instead). He will never understand what you're going through until he needs to go through it.

Maybe you could change everyone's eating by replacing some of your ground beef options with ground turkey and chicken or at least mixing it when you can't give it up totally. Honestly I rarely use ground beef now. Most of our ground meat is turkey and my 3 teens never seem to complain. It will be hard to make any lasting changes but you have to be strong and stay true to yourself. If you're going to be miserable giving in to his diet and meal strategies then there is no point continuing trying to stick to your diet because you are setting yourself up for failure knowing he will throw these wrenches at you.

What about an alternate night meal - you pick Sunday dinner, he picks Monday (and you tweak it for your diet - eat fewer calories, make meat substitutions where possible, skip things like hamburger or dinner rolls, etc.) so that you both get what you want (at least for now). Ideally you want him eating as healthy as you. And maybe, just maybe once he sees how happy you are being fit and healthy, then he might decide to join you. If that happens, half the battle will be won because you have begun already with the meat substitutes in his diet.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.