Lazy, ignorant, clods!!

TheKitsune6 · August 2010

I'm wondering if I'm the only person that gets angry about this...

I have a lot of friends that are overweight. Most of these friends complain about being overweight but never do anything about it. Recently I was trying to convince one such person to work out with me and join this site and we could support and keep track of each other.

Her response was, "But you LIKE to work out, I don't."

I've heard this so many times and it makes me want to SCREAM! I don't LIKE to work out! I HATE it! It's BORING me for me to stand on a machine and not GO anywhere or be THINKING anything productive! But I still wake up at four in the morning so I can get an hour and half workout at the gym before work! I don't LIKE being out of breath and struggling with my asthma. I hate waking up, being tired, bored and in fear of an attack, but I DO it because I HATE being fat and unhealthy more!

Does anyone else encounter this and/or struggle with it?

weaklink109 · August 2010

I have two people in my life that both need to lose at least 100 lbs., but they can only muster the energy to come up with every excuse in the book for why they can't get started.

I have reached the conclusion that "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them jump on a treadmill.":noway:

I did go so far as to tell one friend. "If you think you CAN, you are right, but if you think you CAN'T, you are also right." I think she is still trying to figure out my point.

For the sake of my own sanity, I make my point and then move on. I have enough frustration in my life without setting myself up for more.

TheKitsune6 · August 2010

I understand that, definitely. I don't like that I'm being used as an excuse to not exercise rather than inspiration.

I think what bothers me most is that people are so willing to downplay the effort I put into the weight loss. Ie: You like it so it must not be hard.

springgrl · August 2010

I think what bothers me most is that people are so willing to downplay the effort I put into the weight loss. Ie: You like it so it must not be hard.

Don't let this reflect on you. They want to downplay the effort it takes because they want to believe it is easy and they'll get around to it 'someday'. Or they want to believe it is not something they could do cause then they'd have to put effort in themselves or face the fact they are lazy. Don't worry about their illusions - work on making your reality.

hroush · August 2010

I know some people like that as well. I now find myself yelling (in my head) at severely obese people using a motorized scooter or a cane. I know I don't know their situation or if they have a medical condition, but there is still something they could have done.

PLUMSGRL · August 2010

oh yeah!

people I work with (who are morbidly obese) think I have great will power, enjoy exercise, and only eat a low fat low cal no taste diet (just downed a skinny cow):laugh:
I've tried to show them how to do this weight loss thing the easy way (MFP)

THEY'RE JUST NOT READY FOR IT, HAVEN'T HAD THE AH HA MOMENT, NO REAL REASON TO PUT ANY EFFORT INTO THEIR LIVES, ect, ect, ect.......

I no longer bang my head on the wall, when they ask "How'd you do it?", just answer with the old fashion way- diet and exercise- no pills, no weird drinks, no excuses!:bigsmile:

rosemary10 · August 2010

Funny you bring this up. It sort of happens to me. People say to me "oh my, you have lost weight", so I tell 'em about MFP and if they want to join to look me up cause we could be friends and encourage each other. I've only had one person say they have set up an account and are trying to work with it. She hasn't asked me to be friends yet, but she has asked how to manuver the site. So I know she's here. (I chalk it up to my generation being more tech challenged than others). Probably we'll get together at some point. .......Guess I'm trying to say is don't give up on your friends. When you lose a big amount (and you will), just your presence will have a bigger affect on them than you or they realize. It's powerful. :flowerforyou:

rosemary10 · August 2010

Oh yeah, and I tell them the only reason I exercise is to get more calories to eat and thatdoing a diet journal changes how you look/think about food.

bparr · February 2011

Just found your post-- I too am completely fed up with with the lazy knot heads. I just want to say, put down the darn cookies and move your *kitten*-- get some exercise and quit eating so much crap!!!! :mad:

jmwolffyy · February 2011

I can (sort of) speak for the other side on this because I spent such a long time there myself. I *knew* I needed to lose weight, but it was such a big undertaking that I just told myself, as long as I am otherwise healthy, I don't NEED to lose weight. When in conversation with friends who were watching their diet or going to regular classes for exercise, I would complain, yeah I hate being fat. But if suggestions were made, I immediately went back to my own reassurance that "I am healthy, so I am okay." I had to come to the moment where I was no longer able to tell myself that because it is a flimsy excuse for eating like a pig and sitting on my backside all day every day. But I had to do it for myself, and not because other people thought it was a good idea. I have a feeling that if I HAD gotten an obesity-related disease, I would not be as committed to my lifestyle change as I am because I finally decided I needed to just DO it.
Give your friends the time to come to their own realizations and (considering MFP is such a great community) just let them know when they are ready that joining you here is an option. In the meantime, it probably feels like external pressure, which is not going to get them to the moment when they "get it."
As for yourself, you already "know it" which puts you ahead of the game! :smooched:

MzBug · February 2011

I gave up getting frustrated about it. If they want to know, all they have to do is ask. I will tell them once, after that they are on their own. If they come back with more questions I will help. Not gonna push, not gonna beg, not gonna try to change their narrow view of life. I have enough issues of my own without adding theirs. As my guy says "can't fix stupid".

weaklink109 · March 2011

I gave up getting frustrated about it. If they want to know, all they have to do is ask. I will tell them once, after that they are on their own. ........ As my guy says "can't fix stupid".

Right On!!! I learned a long time ago that until one "gets it," no amount of preaching on healthy diet or selling the benefits of regular physical activity will get through to them.

I posted back in August of 2010 on this thread that I had two friends who both needed to lose who couldn't seem to get the concept of what I was doing. I am happy to report that the lightning finally struck for one of them and she has lost 30 lbs. since October, so you see, it IS possible for people to "get it." We just have to let them do it in their own time, and when they figure out we were right all along, depending upon the relationship, it may or may not be okay to say "What did I tell you? It works!!!" Yay MFP!!

Edited to add: After reading my post, I don't want anyone to think that I am in any way implying that anyone who isn't "ready" to lose is "stupid"--far from it. I had to be in the right place in my head to start on this journey, and I don't presume to judge when and how that realization might come for another person.

That_Girl · March 2011

I don't think it's their fault for feeling that way, persay.

Our culture puts a lot of emphasis on the INSTANT gratification. Unnecessary surgeries, diet pills, plastic surgery are all ways that people can look good RIGHT NOW but not for the long run.

We are programmed that MORE is better and if you can get MORE for LESS then that's even BETTER!

The minute you talk about "will power" or "work" or "persistence", it's a big turn off for people because that takes effort and the pay offs aren't instant.

I get that. I understand that about our society. I can't stand that much of the USA is fat. I loathe that our country, which is so great, has some of the most apathetic, self-entitled creatures to ever walk this planet. Then I realized I was becoming what I hate. So I made a change.

I don't think about my overweight friends as lazy, ignorant or clods. I love them no matter what their size. They bring value to my life that has nothing to do with the fat on their bodies.

I just can't stand the words, "I can't". Maybe that comes with teaching 5th grade :laugh: I really hate the phrase, "I can't." It's not accurate. People should just say, "I won't" or "I don't want to". Fine. It's a personal choice and I respect that. But to say, "I can't" is to give up before you even try and that angers me. Why? Because you SO CAN! Really, you CAN. It just takes time and patience....something most people don't have a lot of.

:flowerforyou:

Lazy, ignorant, clods!!

Replies

Categories