hubby is sabotaging my efforts

nuemmedigg
nuemmedigg Posts: 220 Member
edited September 24 in Motivation and Support
There are chocolate chip cookies and banana bread with lemon icing in the freezer, neatly tucked there for my husband. I haven't touched the stuff and been feeling strong. Yesterday he shows up with a 1 1/2 quart vanilla ice cream and apple pie, and leaves them on the counter. Does he want me to fail???

Replies

  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
    no he dosent,im sure hes just not thinking about it.have you tried talking to him about it.
  • annastasia76
    annastasia76 Posts: 123 Member
    My hubby does that too, he brings the stuff home from work because they need to get rid of it. I keep telling him not to bring him home, he says, "why not, you don't have to eat it"
    they just don't understand!!!
  • leomom72
    leomom72 Posts: 1,797 Member
    so unfair..i surely hope not, i would say depending on how long you have been on this site, he may be forgetting what you are trying to accomplish, out of habit of the old ways..best of luck to you, and feel free to add me if you need more support :)
  • bfrice1
    bfrice1 Posts: 62
    It's possible, but if it is, it may simply be because...yeah, he loves you. He may be worried that once you get your new, hot body you'll want to move to greener pastures. Make sure he understands that of course you won't, he's the only snuggle bunny for you...right??
  • Bridgetc140
    Bridgetc140 Posts: 405 Member
    I doubt he's trying to sabotage you....men truly just don't think sometimes....sorry guys....it's true! lol Be strong! When you want to eat that stuff....repeat to yourself "A moment on the lips.....a lifetime on the hips!"
  • mursey
    mursey Posts: 191 Member
    Wow, I feel for you. One good thing about me living alone is that there's almost nothing in my apartment that can tempt me. Maybe ask him to keep things in a drawer of the fridge/freezer. . . or like you say in a particular cupboard that you won't look in?

    Sometimes guys don't want you to lose weight because they're afraid you'll get all hot and leave them! I'm not saying your husband. . but I have seen that before. . no joke! I have seen friends' men get annoyed when the ladies go to the gym or whatnot too. Silly.
  • deerussell
    deerussell Posts: 9 Member
    That is just plain - not nice! No sense in trying to justify that. Ask him for support and not sabotage.
  • velvetkat
    velvetkat Posts: 454 Member
    I have decided to use my BF as an advantage to my weight loss journey. He loves to eat and can eat anything without gaining an ounce! He is 6'6" and 160lbs. Loves steak and butter and all things bad. One good thing though is that he loves to cook. I decided the only way I was going to win this war on FAT was to get him to really help me. He loves to cook so I challenged him to cook healthy and according to the recipes without cheating on any of them. He has taken on this challenge and is loving making the healthy low fat foods taste good. We've had good things and bad things that didn't turn out to taste like we wanted. All in all it has made me stick to this even more as he has taken this on as his quest to help me lose weight. Oh another thing.. THANK GOD he loves to cook! If your husband does the cooking maybe use it to your advantage and GOOD LUCK!
  • jenbk2
    jenbk2 Posts: 614 Member
    My husband the other day told me I was addicted to working out and it is hurting the family. Um- I work out 45 min a day and not even everyday. I got so mad at him I saw red !
  • Ningymouse
    Ningymouse Posts: 30
    I don't think he wants you to fail intentionally. Just keep trying to fight those urges to eat the bad!!!!!
  • ddao
    ddao Posts: 17
    consider it a true test of your will power. My wife and I both have sweet tooths and it was hard initially not to nibble on things w/ the kids when we gave them treats.

    But we pushed on through and it's made us a lot better in resisting temptations.

    Or you can just have him join you on your diet like I did w/ my wife and I ended up losing 21 lbs and counting...LOL
  • jmdoepp
    jmdoepp Posts: 3
    I think you should talk to him about how difficult it makes it for you when he does this. Maybe make him understand that it is like any other addiction and you just cannot be exposed to it right now because it is too much of a temptation. Once I explained to my husband, he was great about limiting the kind of snacks he brought home. He would get things he likes and knows that I don't so I wouldn't be tempted.
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
    I think you should talk to him about how difficult it makes it for you when he does this. Maybe make him understand that it is like any other addiction and you just cannot be exposed to it right now because it is too much of a temptation. Once I explained to my husband, he was great about limiting the kind of snacks he brought home. He would get things he likes and knows that I don't so I wouldn't be tempted.


    what she said.
  • glcarr65
    glcarr65 Posts: 74
    I know exactly how you feel. We got our girl scout cookies today and I put them right away in the freezer, next thing I know he has a box open on the counter. It is 1 thing for him to eat them but leave them open right out on the counter so every time I walk by I see them.

    It really sucks because he can eat just about whatever he wants and it does not show...me I eat 1 M&M and I gain 3 lbs....
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
    I swear I must have a mans brain because I cant help but agree with the womans husband who said just because their there dosent mean you have to eat them.
    I used to have a real problem with soda,my husband would bring them in the house drink them infront of me all that and I never once had issue with it.It was my problem not his and I would have to learn to resist it sooner or later.Now its been 3 months since ive even tasted a soda and can look at them all day without the temptation of drinking it.
  • LazyMogg
    LazyMogg Posts: 162
    There are chocolate chip cookies and banana bread with lemon icing in the freezer, neatly tucked there for my husband. I haven't touched the stuff and been feeling strong. Yesterday he shows up with a 1 1/2 quart vanilla ice cream and apple pie, and leaves them on the counter. Does he want me to fail???

    Does your husband have a weight problem? If he does and sees you succeeding with weight loss he may be feeling threatened and scared that if you carry on and change your looks, you may change your mind about him too. You could reassure him about that but if he doesn't have a problem himself then he may just be being thoughtless and you will need to spell it out for him. Tell him you want his support not obstacles and he shouldn't just expect you to turn a blind eye to temptation - he just shouldn't put it it there to start with.

    One other thing you can do is tell him that if he does it again the unwanted foodstuff goes straight in the bin. He won't like it but he'll soon get the message. The longer it stays in sight the harder it will be for you to resist.

    Put your foot down and show him you mean business. xx
  • juliapurpletoes
    juliapurpletoes Posts: 951 Member
    I agree with ask her for support...make him understand this is really important to you.

    so sorry for this...why can men be so insensitive?

    :flowerforyou:
  • juliapurpletoes
    juliapurpletoes Posts: 951 Member
    I meant - ask HIM for support!

    need better lighting by my computer!
  • glittersoul
    glittersoul Posts: 666 Member
    I don't think he is trying to sabotage you, but one thing you have to remember is that you are doing this for yourself. So no matter what temptations are around you, you are in control. It's all about exercising your will power. Also, its ok to have treats just watch your portions and then take a walk or go clean something to if you are trying to be good.
  • mamacath
    mamacath Posts: 51
    I think You should just talk to him . maybe he just does not understand ... my husband and I both lost weight and we agree on what comes into this house .. we do however have our cheat days once in awhile which takes the temptations away ... we cleaned out the cupboards and now when my son comes to visit and has his girls he buys tons of snacks and that makes it hard cuz the little ones like it , but when the girls go home we get rid of it .. we are going to have a heart to heart with him for we are trying to get healthy along with working on our 13 year old daughter as well and it makes it hard on her too seeing cookies and chips on the counter that normally we never have .. some guys just dont get it .. my son included
  • kld1624
    kld1624 Posts: 20 Member
    I'm sure he's not trying to make you fail. I'm in a similar boat. My boyfriend didn't even realize that I was making all these big changes. Granted, I've only been taking this seriously for about a week, but he still didn't notice until I told him. Even though he's supporting me, I don't think he quite understands how seriously this is for me. He still thinks it's sweet to offer a handful of Girl Scout cookies or a drink at dunkin's before work every morning like we used to. I explain that I'm serious about losing the weight and if I'm going to do it, I can't keep drinking a 500 calorie dunk's hot chocolate. Especially when I can now get a muffin, yogurt, and unsweetened tea for only 300 calories. So I think part of him understands that I want to succeed, but he doesn't understand the changes I need to make to get there. However, I am really proud of him. He's been asking lots of questions about my Wii exercises and if I can start portioning his lunches for him. So I think he's also ready to start making some changes. But that's a whole different topic. Maybe you're in this same position with your hubby? He likely wants you to succeed, but doesn't quite understand that you can't eat the way he does if you're going to lose the weight.
  • Olona
    Olona Posts: 70
    I'm not sure, you have to remember that just becuase your on a diet or new lifestyle doesnt mean he has to be. Just don't touch the food if he's doin it to get you to fail then over time if you dont touch it he'll most likely stop. If he's doing it out of habit it'll continue.
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