my chubby hubby

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michlingle
michlingle Posts: 797 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Regardless of my model behavior (ha!) I cannot get my husband to follow suit. I never nag him or get on him about his weight, he'd be fine to just lose 20 pounds. He golfs a few times per week and usually walks one of those rounds. I'm sorry, but golf does not get your heart rate up although it does burn some calories just like anything else. I have found that he is in denial about how much crap he eats. He came home last night with disgusting White Castle. I told him he shouldn't eat that garbage....that's the extent of my input. I hope as I continue on this journey he sees how easy it actually is and can finally see that he needs to make some healthy changes. I love him to bits but he eats too much late at night, smokes (1/2 pack a day), doesn't sleep enough, and rarely exercises. Help me help him!!!

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  • michlingle
    michlingle Posts: 797 Member
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    Regardless of my model behavior (ha!) I cannot get my husband to follow suit. I never nag him or get on him about his weight, he'd be fine to just lose 20 pounds. He golfs a few times per week and usually walks one of those rounds. I'm sorry, but golf does not get your heart rate up although it does burn some calories just like anything else. I have found that he is in denial about how much crap he eats. He came home last night with disgusting White Castle. I told him he shouldn't eat that garbage....that's the extent of my input. I hope as I continue on this journey he sees how easy it actually is and can finally see that he needs to make some healthy changes. I love him to bits but he eats too much late at night, smokes (1/2 pack a day), doesn't sleep enough, and rarely exercises. Help me help him!!!
  • songbyrdsweet
    songbyrdsweet Posts: 5,691 Member
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    :love: omg omg omg I loooooove White Castle. They don't have it in Va! :sad:

    *Ahem*

    But yea....garbage...it is. :laugh:
    You know, I was in exactly your spot last year, except my bf was drinking a lot rather than smoking. In the beginning of my weigh loss, I was like the Food Police...I tried to get him to stop cold turkey, and he was entirely uninterested. All it did was create bitterness. So I let up, and just kept going on my own. Once he started to notice how good I looked (hehe :devil: ) I started to invite him to go to the gym with me, or go on a run, or even a romantic walk at night (at about 3.5 mph lol). It's best just to voice your concerns in a nice way (which is what you've done here) and invite him to join you, then leave it alone if he declines. Only he can decide if he wants to change.
  • chilli
    chilli Posts: 211 Member
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    Maybe when he sees YOUR results ....BUT when he is ready..you can lead a horse to water but can't make it drink as they say ...
    Maybe all these MFP'ers shoud gang up on him to point him in the right direction????? :bigsmile::laugh:
  • Renae_Nae
    Renae_Nae Posts: 935 Member
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    Can you cook healthy meals every/most nights? With my husband, he'll eat what I cook, so the healthier I cook, the healthier he eats. Other than that, you can't motivate or make him want to change...he has to do that for himself.

    Once he sees how much you've changed, how much energy you have, etc...then he might, but you can't force him to want to change.
  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
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    You can't make him do it with you if he's not ready anymore than he could have made you do it with him had he been first- you can lead a horse to water, and all that jazz.

    Just live it, succeed with it, enjoy it and maybe he'll join with you-- maybe he won't-- ??
  • michlingle
    michlingle Posts: 797 Member
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    Can you cook healthy meals every/most nights? With my husband, he'll eat what I cook, so the healthier I cook, the healthier he eats. Other than that, you can't motivate or make him want to change...he has to do that for himself.

    Once he sees how much you've changed, how much energy you have, etc...then he might, but you can't force him to want to change.

    I cook almost all the meals in the house and they are always healthy. But it still doesn't matter he's a restaurant manager so he's around food all the time. I think he underestimates the amount of things he eats at work. I wish the switch would go off in his head like it did mine. I think as he sees my own improvements he will make the switch too....in time.
  • Poison5119
    Poison5119 Posts: 1,460 Member
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    I am in the same boat. :grumble:

    Despite that I've lost weight and have an almost religious devotion and tenacity to this way of life, I cannot get my BF to follow suit. He said "I'm impressed with your progress, hun, good job!"

    He has given up drinking Mountain Dew, which helped him drop about 5 lbs. Unfortunately, his diet consists of bratwurst, pizza rolls, Burger Kill, McFattys, Arbys, egg/cheese/miracle whip sandwiches, ham and cheese sandwiches. ON top of that he smokes and drinks sweet tea. He blames his unwillingness to join me on the fact that he doesn't like chicken or fish (which is almost exclusive to my diet at home), and has no teeth with which to chew raw vegetation. He won't eat my foods, just doesn't like 'em. So I cook for me and imagine what that hefty life insurance policy will buy me when he drops dead of a massive heart attack. J/K. :huh:
  • Poison5119
    Poison5119 Posts: 1,460 Member
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    I am in the same boat. :grumble:

    Despite that I've lost weight and have an almost religious devotion and tenacity to this way of life, I cannot get my BF to follow suit. He said "I'm impressed with your progress, hun, good job!"

    He has given up drinking Mountain Dew, which helped him drop about 5 lbs. Unfortunately, his diet consists of bratwurst, pizza rolls, Burger Kill, McFattys, Arbys, egg/cheese/miracle whip sandwiches, ham and cheese sandwiches. ON top of that he smokes and drinks sweet tea. He blames his unwillingness to join me on the fact that he doesn't like chicken or fish (which is almost exclusive to my diet at home), and has no teeth with which to chew raw vegetation. He won't eat my foods, just doesn't like 'em. So I cook for me and imagine what that hefty life insurance policy will buy me when he drops dead of a massive heart attack. J/K. :huh:
  • lmwardx
    lmwardx Posts: 74
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    im in the same boat!! my fiance smokes a pack a day and drinks wine mixed w/ soda to make it sweet every night!! i beg him to work out w/ me but he rather sit and play video games on the computer all night. the only thing he will do with me is to walk right after dinner. he said he likes to relax when he gets home and has a routine but we had a compromis walk after dinner. its a little step but its somewhat helping! My man love to go tot the park and play frisbee so some weekends we do that even though im not into frisbee but its a great work out. he has me running all over the place. what he doesnt know is i have some hiking trips planned out for us. im taking him to see the redwoods but he probaly didnt realize he has to hike to see em!! be sneaky LOL!!
  • BrenNew
    BrenNew Posts: 3,420 Member
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    What's White Castle?
  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
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    burger chain--
  • DjBliss05
    DjBliss05 Posts: 682
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    He has given up drinking Mountain Dew, which helped him drop about 5 lbs.

    Heh, that reminds me of that diet pill commercial where the woman stays fat when the man drops all the weight from making little commercials. Hehe.

    So, I sympathize. My man has way more than 20lbs to lose and it worries me. 30 years old and taking high blood pressure pills seems like a bad thing to me. So my approach is to make small changes in the house. I started buying prepackaged meats from Omaha Steaks. It is so yummy and the portions are much smaller than he is used to! It is a good way to sneak in the changes. We also buy less junk in general and I try not to encourage eatting out.

    Another thing was that I asked him to help me. Now he is making the changes, too. But he isn't looking at it like that. He sees it as being my knight in shining armor and helping me reach my goals. Hey, I'm fine with that! LoL.

    Most important thing is not to nag. My mother (diff situation totally, but still applies) nagged the crap out of me when I grew up and it just made me feel bad. I also got really great at tuning her out. I know you said you don't nag, but I would say very little on the subject unless it is positive. Good luck! Would love to hear if he gets on board!
  • zoepane
    zoepane Posts: 209
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    First dont nag, most men just turn off at that point

    Fix healthy meals, dont buy the junk food, and maybe if he sees changes in you, he will follow

    My hubby, is chubby too, but he has about 10-15 pounds to lose...
    but he eats my healthy meals, he just loves pop tart before bed ugggggg!!!
    :noway:
  • BrenNew
    BrenNew Posts: 3,420 Member
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    burger chain--

    Thanks. I'd never heard of it. We don't have those in the sticks of NH! :laugh:
  • lmwardx
    lmwardx Posts: 74
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    im in the same boat!! my fiance smokes a pack a day and drinks wine mixed w/ soda to make it sweet every night!! i beg him to work out w/ me but he rather sit and play video games on the computer all night. the only thing he will do with me is to walk right after dinner. he said he likes to relax when he gets home and has a routine but we had a compromis walk after dinner. its a little step but its somewhat helping! My man love to go tot the park and play frisbee so some weekends we do that even though im not into frisbee but its a great work out. he has me running all over the place. what he doesnt know is i have some hiking trips planned out for us. im taking him to see the redwoods but he probaly didnt realize he has to hike to see em!! be sneaky LOL!!

    so we ended up hiking Monday and man it was nice!! i posted a topic on it yesterday. Any who he ended up really liking it because the place had water falls he doesnt really like the hiking part but just liked going and we comprimsed yet again this time he wants to ride bikes hes been begging for a bike this year. so next trip going to some bike trails and I looked up places that have creeks and water falls again so it more fun. any who we hiked for 2 hours and I showed him the calculations of how many calories burned he was amazed and can't wait to do it again! hope what ever it will work for you!!
  • ohthatbambi
    ohthatbambi Posts: 1,098 Member
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    A couple weeks ago we watched a 46 year old (overweight) man drop dead from a heart attack at a high school football game. It was AWFUL. They never revived him, but they were still trying as they made their way down the bleachers to the ambulance. The man's face was blue. It was awful. If seeing that doesn't make someone "see the light" then I don't know what will. It certainly opened our eyes.
  • jamerz3294
    jamerz3294 Posts: 1,824 Member
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    What's White Castle?
    OMG.... I ADORE sliders, especially for breakfast! And a Crave Case is my idea of a banquet! The deal is that the burgers are pertty small, so you can eat a LOT of them... especially after the bar closes and you've got munchies! WC is pretty much in the Midwest, in larger cities, which is probably a good thing for me *chuckle*
    B00032IW82.01-A3CDPEGSIQM61V.LZZZZZZZ.jpg
  • lmwardx
    lmwardx Posts: 74
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    white castle is a child memory growing up i sue to live in ohio where they have white castle every where and living in cali no white castle! But the other day i was grocery shopping and they sell em in the freezer section. I wanted one but i figure after i lose 20lbs it will be a treat just to have 2 lil burgers. I went to visit FL and they have the same except its called krystal.

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