Apparently, I'm a feeder.

kettlewitch
kettlewitch Posts: 277 Member
edited September 2024 in Health and Weight Loss
My husband says I'm a feeder. Apparently, since I've been getting healthy I'm trying to fatten him up. But if I can't eat it then he has to! Is it my fault the iced buns were 3 for 2?

I do buy chocolate for people. It's so I can still go through the process of buying it but don't actually eat it and my son did beg me to stop trying to feed him the contents of the fridge when he visited. Is this just me?

Replies

  • lutzsher
    lutzsher Posts: 1,153 Member
    Ha ha, Im the oposite. Im trying to convert everyone to eating extremely healthy!
  • thecanface
    thecanface Posts: 1,180 Member
    OMG I DO THE SAME THING!!! boyfriend is always asking why i eat salad and he has chili dogs, why i make cinamon rolls and i don't even taste one... i am eating vicariously through him lol
  • karenjoy
    karenjoy Posts: 1,840 Member
    I think it is just you, and really you need to examine why you need to buy chocolate and iced buns at all, after all, you KNOW they are crap and yet you want to give them to people you love to eat. STOP!!!

    Get them to eat healthy things with you, makes it so much easier, healthier and happier. Especially for your son :flowerforyou:
  • SmartFunGorgeous
    SmartFunGorgeous Posts: 699 Member
    I am sorta the same. If I can't control WHAT food is around me, I try to make sure everyone else eats it so I don't!
  • army_cobra
    army_cobra Posts: 136 Member
    This is kinda funny but i would stop buying any kind of junk food. You dont want to have it around and just have one of those days ya know
  • hroush
    hroush Posts: 2,073 Member
    My wife loves to buy chocolate bars and then "share" them with me, even if I told her I didn't want it in the first place. She knows my disdain for throwing away food, so she'll threaten to throw out the rest if I don't eat it. I'd rather burn off that extra 100 calories than watch money being thrown into the garbage.
  • khk2010
    khk2010 Posts: 451 Member
    Not me. I am of the mind that if I can get healthy and lose weight I want my husband to do the same. Not that he has…
  • amandabrady
    amandabrady Posts: 203 Member
    If you know that the food is unhealthy to the point that you yourself will not consume it, why would you feed it to your loved ones?
  • JulieBoBoo
    JulieBoBoo Posts: 642
    I've actually changed the whole family's diet and my husband has started eating less because I eat less. He's lost 26.6lbs to my 58 without actually breaking a sweat. I'm happy for him even if I'm a little jealous :P
  • JennLifts
    JennLifts Posts: 1,913 Member
    LOL!!!!! I make bad stuff for others every now and then ;)
  • quara
    quara Posts: 255 Member
    I am totally the same way. It's one thing if there's something in the house that I'm trying not to eat, I'll try to get my husband to eat it. And if I throw a party, I love to have way too much food for my friends. I'm a 'nurturer' that way! I"ll always bake cookies for my friends or coworkers.

    I also use food to represent love. I'll buy my husband's favourite chocolate bar or chips for him if I see it, because it means 'I was thinking about you'.

    But I think I sometimes also have this weird mentality that it doesn't matter how much I eat, as long as I eat less than the person next to me (usually my husband) then I'm OK. if I ate a bag of chips, then I want my husband to eat two bags of chips, so I feel better about myself. If he doesn't eat any chips, then I feel like a cow... if he eats two bags, well then by comparison, look at my awesome willpower! I know it doesn't make any sense but sometimes I find myself pushing food towards him even if he doesn't want it!
  • FitToBeFab
    FitToBeFab Posts: 537 Member
    I sometimes pawn off my goods to friends that work out like maniacs (I have a friend who's training for her SECOND ironman competition). It's usually little things like a bag of chips I'm not going to finish before it goes stale, or half a dozen cupcakes I brought to work and no one ate.

    But with my roommate and my boyfriend, I'm totally on the heathly bandwagon. I cooked dinner for all of us last night and couldn't stop gabbing about how low-sodium it was, and how it worked out to perfect three servings! My roommate ended up having cereal too, after dinner though.
  • hroush
    hroush Posts: 2,073 Member

    But I think I sometimes also have this weird mentality that it doesn't matter how much I eat, as long as I eat less than the person next to me (usually my husband) then I'm OK. if I ate a bag of chips, then I want my husband to eat two bags of chips, so I feel better about myself. If he doesn't eat any chips, then I feel like a cow... if he eats two bags, well then by comparison, look at my awesome willpower! I know it doesn't make any sense but sometimes I find myself pushing food towards him even if he doesn't want it!

    I think my wife is the same way. One time we went to Olive garden and I just wanted the soup, salad, and bread sticks (I had just started to eat healthy). She then got thoroughly pissed at me because if she ordered anything else off the menu, she'd look like a cow :huh: Because of this, she was "forced" to order the salad as well, which she didn't even touch. Thanks honey for the $17 salad meal.
  • SheliaN1960
    SheliaN1960 Posts: 454 Member
    LOL! I find myself doing that too!! i think we are just being sweet. Best wishes!
  • kettlewitch
    kettlewitch Posts: 277 Member
    Told off by a couple of people! Oops. It was supposed to be a bit lighthearted rather than an image of me sitting on my husband ramming iced buns in him. They were st patricks iced buns and he's from Dublin so it was kind of a treat. I would love to cook him healthy food, but when you've spent 7 years of marriage watching him pick out tiny bits of vegetables from whatever you've cooked until all you want to do is smack him in the face with the TV controls, you kind of give up trying. That said, he ate the very healthy Irish stew I made without having to have the TV controls removed from his face so maybe I'm getting somewhere.
  • beautyqueen1979
    beautyqueen1979 Posts: 151 Member
    I've actually changed the whole family's diet and my husband has started eating less because I eat less. He's lost 26.6lbs to my 58 without actually breaking a sweat. I'm happy for him even if I'm a little jealous :P

    THIS! My fiance has lost about 20lbs over the last 6-8months with zero effort. He eats what I make, has a slightly bigger portion usually and still has some snacks/treats if he wants to. One of my goals is to weigh less than him...but he keeps moving the goalposts :grumble:

    And regarding the 'feeding' - my fiance was already at a healthy weight BEFORE he lost the weight, so I would say that he doesn't need to lose anymore!! So in that sense I am a feeder, making sure he is eating more than me so he STOPS losing weight :laugh:
  • kettlewitch
    kettlewitch Posts: 277 Member
    My husband is a bit overweight,he put on2 stone when he gave up smoking 4 yearsago and has never lost it.

    This has raised an interesting point though. People have said that I shouldn't have junk in the house if I won't eat it but is it fair to inflict my diet on my husband? He is benefiting from the changes. No takeaways at all this year and he is hiking with me at weekends but he has an active job ( as opposed to my desk job) so can eat more than me. He has cut out full fat coke too so is making small changes but it's not for me to take his half of the household money and fill up the fridge with lentils.Also, to paraphrase a previous post, I find it harder to resist cravings when there is nothing tempting in the house. It makes me want it more if I can't have it rather than knowing its there.
  • hroush
    hroush Posts: 2,073 Member
    My husband is a bit overweight,he put on2 stone when he gave up smoking 4 yearsago and has never lost it.

    This has raised an interesting point though. People have said that I shouldn't have junk in the house if I won't eat it but is it fair to inflict my diet on my husband? He is benefiting from the changes. No takeaways at all this year and he is hiking with me at weekends but he has an active job ( as opposed to my desk job) so can eat more than me. He has cut out full fat coke too so is making small changes but it's not for me to take his half of the household money and fill up the fridge with lentils.Also, to paraphrase a previous post, I find it harder to resist cravings when there is nothing tempting in the house. It makes me want it more if I can't have it rather than knowing its there.

    The deal I make with my wife is that she can have junk food, but she must hide it from me as I'll end up eating more of it than she will.
  • kettlewitch
    kettlewitch Posts: 277 Member
    I've actually changed the whole family's diet and my husband has started eating less because I eat less. He's lost 26.6lbs to my 58 without actually breaking a sweat. I'm happy for him even if I'm a little jealous :P

    THIS! My fiance has lost about 20lbs over the last 6-8months with zero effort. He eats what I make, has a slightly bigger portion usually and still has some snacks/treats if he wants to. One of my goals is to weigh less than him...but he keeps moving the goalposts :grumble:

    And regarding the 'feeding' - my fiance was already at a healthy weight BEFORE he lost the weight, so I would say that he doesn't need to lose anymore!! So in that sense I am a feeder, making sure he is eating more than me so he STOPS losing weight :laugh:

    My initial goal will put my BMI at 29. Overweight, but after being super morbidly obese with a BMI of 53 I think that's a fair goal at this stage, I'm currently 43. To be at an equivalent stage my husband needs to be 3 stone heavier. I think when I go below that, he will panic and raise the stakes!
  • lovetowrite73
    lovetowrite73 Posts: 1,244 Member
    My husband is a bit overweight,he put on2 stone when he gave up smoking 4 yearsago and has never lost it.

    This has raised an interesting point though. People have said that I shouldn't have junk in the house if I won't eat it but is it fair to inflict my diet on my husband? He is benefiting from the changes. No takeaways at all this year and he is hiking with me at weekends but he has an active job ( as opposed to my desk job) so can eat more than me. He has cut out full fat coke too so is making small changes but it's not for me to take his half of the household money and fill up the fridge with lentils.Also, to paraphrase a previous post, I find it harder to resist cravings when there is nothing tempting in the house. It makes me want it more if I can't have it rather than knowing its there.
    I've "inflicted" my healthier lifestyle on my SO and family & while they miss the junk, they've learned to love the good stuff & actually put in requests. They're being supportive all while benefiting themselves.
  • SmellyMelly13
    SmellyMelly13 Posts: 30
    I'm a feeder too, somedays I'll bring cookies or cupcakes or something into work for everyone else, just so I don't feel bad about eating one and/or to eat vicariously through people that don't care about what they're eating.

    I think it's a sickness haha.
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