Hosts offended by bringing own snacks?!?

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rmhand
rmhand Posts: 1,067 Member
in Food and Nutrition
A few weeks ago my BF and I stayed at his cousins house while I was apartment hunting a few hours from where I live. They had some summer sausage, cheese, and crackers for a snack while we were playing cards. After a few slices of sausage I remembered that I had packed some healthy snacks for the ride. I got up and got my baggie of cheerios and my host seemed offended that "his snack wasn't good enough for me". I had planned ahead after eating way too much the previous weekend while visiting my parents. The next morning I had a protein breakfast bar and again my host said "we have cereal and breakfast food if you want some thing". Like I was being rude.

Has anyone else experienced that? or if you are hosting a guest would you be offended that they brought their own food?

Replies

  • mcuevas1
    mcuevas1 Posts: 2
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    No, It wouldn't bother me. Today I just signed up on this and I am emailing all my fiends to let them know - I am not going to do Happy Hours for a while (they understood) and they get it I have a goal and am trying very hard to get there!!
  • Newfiedan
    Newfiedan Posts: 1,517 Member
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    Some people get offended in situations like that as they feel as if they are not being a good host or that their hospitality is not being well received. I would simply explain that you are trying to make changes and have preplanned these things and that you appreciate what they are doing for you.
  • cheshirehaze
    cheshirehaze Posts: 1 Member
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    Host's problem. Not yours. You had some of his snacks. Keep up with your plan.
  • Pandorian
    Pandorian Posts: 2,055 MFP Moderator
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    If they have special dietary needs ie lactose or gluten intolerances I much prefer my "guests" to bring their own thing than for me to attempt to figure out via quick google search and last minute shopping to have suitable items available for THEIR needs.

    And I'll always bring my own snacks places, after a huge over day when every meal was out and I indulged at the coffee shop I bring my own snacks so I can control my calories for the day. I take my own snacks to the movies too, no need to have a family pack of their chocolate or popcorn just because I'm at the theatre.
  • soccermom004
    soccermom004 Posts: 444 Member
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    Did you explain why you were eating your own snacks? Next time you might bring some stuff to share with your hosts instead of just having stuff for yourself. Maybe bring a fruit platter to share etc?
  • leafyq
    leafyq Posts: 21
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    That's bound to happen, because people who don't care to eat healthily often don't think of others who do. I personally wouldn't care. And I also think it's a bit silly, because it's not like they cooked a meal for you and you didn't want it. -_-
  • MrsCon40
    MrsCon40 Posts: 2,351 Member
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    Next time you might want to have your snack in another room so as not to offend...
  • SongbirdLandy
    SongbirdLandy Posts: 188 Member
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    Yes! I know how you feel! My cousin invited us over one night and ordered pizzas. She knew I was eating healthy, but still was offended when I came in with Subway for myself to eat. My hubby and son ate the pizza. She said the exact same thing, "What, my food isn't good enough for you?" In which I should've said, "Actually, no it's not! I shouldn't even be letting my husband and son eat that fat ridden pizza!" Instead, I just told her that I had eaten a lot of calories earlier in the day and wanted to make sure I didn't go over on calories. She still acted offended and hasn't invited us over since. I personally think it is rude that she EXPECTED me to eat the pizza considering she knows that I have changed my lifestyle, but whatever.
  • Becky1971
    Becky1971 Posts: 979 Member
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    I would never be offended, I always want people to feel comfortable and at home as much as possible, whatever that means for them.
  • ShellyMacchi
    ShellyMacchi Posts: 975 Member
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    i'd suggest in the future, before arriving, you let your hosts know you will be bringing some of the foods you yourself need to have so as to not inconvenience them, and doing so will prevent them from spending extra money on foods to have on hand for you, with all good intentions, but that just are not suitable for you... helps prevent hurt feelings all around *S*
  • therobinator
    therobinator Posts: 832 Member
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    While I can understand how/why some people might feel offended, I personally would not be offended at all. I have many friends with dietary restrictions or allergies, and I try to cater to them as much as I can when we host....but if they don't think they can eat what I am serving, who am I to say they should not eat their own stuff? I'd rather people be happy and "rude" than hungry and polite.
  • Katbaran
    Katbaran Posts: 605 Member
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    I have to agree with everyone else. I wouldn't be offended if folks brought snacks. I might know these folks but I don't know what every single person I know likes to eat or what kind of eating plan or diet they might be on. My son, ok, I know what he eats. I also know what my DIL eats. If they showed up and were dieting or decided not to eat meat, I wouldn't be offended. I'd punt. A host should do their best to make their guests comfortable and if it makes them comfortable to bring their own snacks, then I'd go with it.
  • rmhand
    rmhand Posts: 1,067 Member
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    Did you explain why you were eating your own snacks? Next time you might bring some stuff to share with your hosts instead of just having stuff for yourself. Maybe bring a fruit platter to share etc?
    I like the idea of bringing something to share. It would help us all.

    As for explaining to them when I'm doing I feel likes it tough because I am a petite person just trying to be healthier. Most people don't think I need to lose weight.
  • deeharley
    deeharley Posts: 1,208 Member
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    Did you explain why you were eating your own snacks? Next time you might bring some stuff to share with your hosts instead of just having stuff for yourself. Maybe bring a fruit platter to share etc?

    This is a good idea. I am going to face situations where I know the food won't be very healthy. I have already planned to take a veggie tray to share.
  • Newfiedan
    Newfiedan Posts: 1,517 Member
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    petite does not = healthy unfortunately society does not see it that way.
  • Georgie_P
    Georgie_P Posts: 62
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    Perhaps he was making the comments because what you were doing was reminding him that he was making bad choices.

    Remember alot of times we lash out at people who are trying to better themselves - education, weight, career, marriage, because we simply see our own flaws ...

    you did what was best for yourself and no one whould ever feel bad for that
  • karensoxfan
    karensoxfan Posts: 902 Member
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    Some people get offended in situations like that as they feel as if they are not being a good host or that their hospitality is not being well received. I would simply explain that you are trying to make changes and have preplanned these things and that you appreciate what they are doing for you.

    This was my first reaction too. That they were probably just worried that you were snubbing their offerings. It's also socially awkward for some people when everyone's eating one thing, and one person is eating something different. I've found it does help to bring enough for sharing.

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