need to vent

ChantalD75
ChantalD75 Posts: 680 Member
edited September 25 in Motivation and Support
So my office is not the healthy type of people... they work out but NONE of them watch what they eat. They order in on Fridays at least twice a month. And they go out often. I don't mind I bring in my lunch and eat in the small lunch room we have. When they order in I will sit with them and eat my lunch. But they don't seem to understand my struggle. They keep asking me to join them with the food and not ask only once.... Now today the whole office is going out for lunch and there is nothing healthy at this restaurant plus i would rather just eat the lunch I brought because I know what is in the food and it's easier for me to track and log it. But I have asked many times now to just go with them and have a side salad??? ARE THEY SERIOUS.... so what come back starving and eat the lunch I brought and now I have more calories to log??? don't think so... so I said I will stay behind and eat once again alone and cover the phones.... I feel like I am being punished for my new lifestyle (not a diet!!).... Anyone else out there feel the same way?

Replies

  • mandapanda001
    mandapanda001 Posts: 370 Member
    Actually I do somewhat. Our office eats out every day and not only is it not healthy but cost too much money to me. I was roped in to eating out a lot of times but trying to curb that now and bring my lunch more often. I got irritated that other day because a co-worker was undermining my struggle to watch my calories and watch what I ate. It almost seemed like she was jealous that I was taking this step but don't really know. I was talking about how many calories was in something I ate and this was before I joined myfitnesspal and she was like well I don't count calories because if I want to eat something I will eat something and I wanted to say well its your health and if you want to die young be my guest but of course I am sweeter than that, lol!! Hang in there you are not the only one that deals with the pressure at work!! Just stay strong and you will be the one who has the last laugh when you reach your goals!!
  • amymunn
    amymunn Posts: 115 Member
    I dont have the same struggles, but I just want to tell you that it isn't up to them what you eat! you can eat whatever you want, no matter what they say! in the end, you will be the one looking better and feeling better and being alot more healthy than them! good luck with everything :]
  • promiseskept
    promiseskept Posts: 119
    I think what I have found is that there are different things I can eat that when people order, I get differently. When every one ordered Pizza, I did get the greek salad that is offered in the same place and when my friends and I went out, I looked at the menue ahead of time and found quite a few things that fit within the food budget.
    You are on a life time change so you may want to figure out how to make it work with people and not apart from people.
    A group of mine went to the cheesecake factory. I googles the menue ahead of time, got a side salad and mahi mahi with asparagus and ate fresh strawberries and a cafe latte for desert and my friends were all kind of envious of my good choices and now want to order that next time. You are setting an example!
  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
    Definitely Google the menu ahead of time if you have to go with them. Plus you can also ask the server if the chef can accomodate food restrictions or allergies. Then maybe you can get a plain piece of grilled chicken with steamed veggies or something like that :)
  • Dponta
    Dponta Posts: 13 Member
    You can order whatever you want to and have them custom make it just for you. i do this all of the time. Find something on the menu that you like and then ask them to leave a few things out. You don't have to order anything just the way they make it. You need to stay involved, you don't want to isolate yourself. A lot of people don't understand or even think about the struggles others have when it comes to weight loss. So some of the people in your office may not even think they are offending you. Go out and have some fun! This lifestyle isn't going to work if you aren't able to adapt
  • poolcue
    poolcue Posts: 35
    Hope I don't offend anyone by saying the following.

    A strick diet is good, but a cheat meal or a cheat day is also good. It's both good for the emotional and your body. You want to use the cheat day to confuse your body so it will burn more fat.and that your won't have a plateau. So I say in moderate is a good thing to allow yourself to cheat a little, beside it always make your next workout that much more meaningful.

    PC
  • aflane
    aflane Posts: 625 Member
    Stick to your guns and just say "No!". I have people in my office that do the exact same thing to me.

    Just this week, someone brought in leftover Chinese food from some party over the weekend for the ofice. I've said "No thanks" so many times that it's now assumed that I'll not be partaking. But someone came to my office to invite me to join them in the leftover lunch, wth the preamble "I know you'll probably say no, but in case you're interested.....". FIrst off, why would I want someone ELSE'S picked over leftovers??? DISGUSTING!! And more importantly, none of the people who were eating the leftovers actually knew WHAT they were eating? They weren't sure if they were eating chicken or duck! How would I track that? I stuck with my homemade soup and veggies, tyvm.
  • ej_xo
    ej_xo Posts: 75
    Yea...every day at my office lunch is an EVENT.

    We're a small office, so they all take turns making big meals the night before and then bringing it in as a type of POT-LUCK.
    EVERY.SINGLE.DAY! ...and it's always the worst things! CHEESY MASHED POTATOES, Burgers, Poutine (Fries/Cheese/Gravy), GIANT hot dogs, Mac n' Cheese, Lasagna. WITH DESSERT = Chocolate Cake, Brownies Donuts etc.

    No healthier options, no salads, no fruit...no one even drinks water...its always COLA!

    It's absolutely remarkable how much these people eat at lunch! ...and they ALWAYS pressure me to join in...even though they know about my struggles with food. It's ridiculous.

    I just stick to my own choices, I've learned to tune out the comments.
    It's also not too hard to resist the temptations, because during these lunches they all complain about their heart/health problems. HMMM. WONDER WHY?

    Anyways, I kinda continued the vent...just know that you're not alone.
    Today's society isn't conscious about what impact food can have on one's health - especially with indulgences like that!

    /RANT
  • cbirdso
    cbirdso Posts: 465 Member
    Been there, done that, starred in the movie. You DO get used to it, but our entire social interaction is centered around overeating and sharing fatting food. Stepping outside this social structure to take care of your own needs is hard at first. You can do this without alienating friendships or being resigned to loneliness. Bring your food to work, but join in once in a while on days when you can plan to have extra calories. Don't worry overmuch about what you eat, but don't overdo it. Try to record what you eat, then with practice overtime, it will become easier to make choices that won't derail your progress.
  • MJ5898
    MJ5898 Posts: 1,549 Member
    If possible see if there is anything healthy on the menu. If not, maybe you could ask for them to use the ingredients they stock to make something healthy - a lean meat with veggies as a side without all the sauces and stuff?

    Do not let them make you feel bad for taking care of yourself. But, since it is a lifestyle change, opportunities to dine out with others will present themselves repeatedly, so we need to develop strategies for dealing with them. Certainly, declining an invite is one method, but there will be times when that is not an option, so we need to know the relative calorie/nutritional values of foods to be able to make the best choices when we do eat out.

    You keep on taking care of you, whatever you do. If you are not comfortable trying to find something to eat off the menu, then stick to your guns and eat your lunch at work. In the end, you are the only one who has to live with the choices you make.

    Hugs!
  • armywife121110
    armywife121110 Posts: 117
    I know EXACTLY how you feel. The girls in my office eat out everyday and always ask if I want anything. When I tell them no I am watching what I eat they look at me like I have three heads. And the other day by boss (who weaights about 10lbs soaking wet) said to me, why are you watching what you eat just eat in moderation... Thats easy for her to say but for someone like me who has always struggled with weight it's not that easy!
  • trhonda2011
    trhonda2011 Posts: 35
    Yes I believe this is a common issue in the workplace. I work with a bunch of guys (engineers to be exact), not many are concerned with their health. The few women that are here are predominantly overweight, all struggling with the same issues, but choose to live with it instead of without it. Every now & then within our small bunch someone is on a quest to get healthy, so it helps motivate the others. We do have a cafeteria at my place of work, and I really get along with the staff there. They noticed that I went six weeks straight without having anything from the cafeteria, and they saw I was losing weight. When it was all said and done the staff joined the 90 day challenge I'm on! LOL! Its been a whirlwind but I've stuck to my guns for an entire 90 days and starting on round 2. My issue are those who want to demean what you're doing, in hopes their "plan" will work better. But when its all said and done, it works for me. I'm doing it the "healthy" way, not the "fad diet" way, and many don't understand it. But every now and then, I convert one over in a quest to win the war on fat! LOL! Okay off my soapbox.
  • ChantalD75
    ChantalD75 Posts: 680 Member
    thank you all for your post!! I have a girl here that actually just told me that she is proud of me for sticking with it and she asked the others to bring her back something and she will join me for lunch... I feel bad but she said that she would rather stay with me and let the others bring her back pizza!! I know I will have to deal with this issue sooner or later and don't want to issulate myself but the restaurant they are going to isn't healthy at all... and half the time they don't even have enough things to make what you order!! I think I will wait for a bit until I am more confortable with this journey before I join them for lunch... unless they go somewhere that has more healthier choices. I am the bigger girl in the office so it's hard for them to understand as they never lived this... I have lost the same weight over and over and I just want this to be my LAST TIME. I need to be healthy for my 3 boys. Plus I want to loose as much as I can before the summer.... so I can enjoy the summer this time around ... not hiding in the house like I did last year...

    thank you all for the support!! I appreciate it!!
  • walkforever
    walkforever Posts: 11
    Honestly, its nice to read about all of these other similar situations as my own, I 100% know what you are going through. (Sorry, this is long.)

    In October 2010 I started a new job. Before then, I had been working very hard at exercising and counting calories and had acheived great results (went from 168 to about 153) and i felt so good. Then I started this new job.

    There is a kitchen packed with all kinds of candy and cookies, all the time. There is a soda fountain. I would say about 70% of the time someone brings in cake (for BREAKFAST!!) There are also (HUGE!) bagels and muffins available every morning for breakfast.

    This is not all. Everyday we order lunch. They pay for it, which is really nice and great and I am very grateful, but the options are hard to keep healthy. Mondays and Thursdays is sushi, so thats fine, but Tuesdays (indian) Wednesdays (Italian) and Fridays (Dumplings or Deli) are hard. And its so hard to walk past the big chocolate cream cake or carrot cake with cream cheese icing (extra icing available in the fridge at all times) or the mini milky ways and butterfingers. ITS SO HARD that for my first three months I didnt. I didn't say no, i ate and i ate and put on about 25 pounds. (SOOO QUICKLY TOO). I was having my current calorie allotment (apx 1200 cals) all during breakfast, so then clearly the rest of the day is shot too.

    I hit rock bottom, the scale showed my highest weight ever at 175 pounds. so, finally i got back on track, started exercising again and counting cals.

    What I learned is that the only person i hurt when I give in is myself. you can do it! you can keep saying no. and if I were you, i would try to not offer to cover the phones, go out for a walk or maybe do a quick gym workout if you can during that time. no reason you should be (or feel that you are being) punished for being healthy!!! you should give yourself a big pat on the back. we are all proud of you!
  • DayAtATime
    DayAtATime Posts: 72
    My office workers are definitely not thinking about their health and on all occasions, lunch purchased by the company will include the likes of pizza, burgers, fries, chinese food, etc. My office workers have gotten used to the fact that I don't usually participate but will say something like "we have pizza today, if you want some." Sometimes if I know in advance, I will plan so that I can participate and feel part of the group. I usually tell them that "if I am going to eat pizza or a big burger, it sure is not going to be at my desk but at night with my husband." No offense to my co-workers, but if I am going to splurge, it probably won't be with them. Another thing that I do when offered chocolate or candy or donuts, is to simply take some and then not eat it. I either return it to the break room or dispose of it discreetly. I have found this works great as I don't get the usual "Of come on, have a piece, no really you should try this, etc."
  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
    Sometimes lunch is about the social aspects and not the nutritional. They obviously enjoy getting together outside the office.
  • Triquetra
    Triquetra Posts: 270 Member
    I have a couple of strategies for this:

    1. Stay back or see if you can choose the restaurant

    2. When doing catering now I make sure I am the one who "volunteers" to order the food so that I can get healther choices, and surprisingly there have been few complaints about this ]

    3. Ask the chef to make a special request meal. I have a child with a severe allergy to corn and all corn products so when eating anywhere I have to make sure that there was no corn syrup used as sweetener or corn flour in the breading. I have found most restaurants to be very accommodating and a lot of restaurants keep a kitchen binder with the ingredients of what is used in the kitchen if it is not from scratch

    So plan accordingly and join the "girls" when it suits you diet and stick to your guns if it doesn't. :drinker:
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